conspiracyofcrazy

[conspiracyofcrazy]

The pettiness is just 👌😂

[conspiracyofcrazy]

USA people! Buy NOTHING Feb 28 2025. Not anything. 24 hours. No spending. Buy the day before or after but nothing. NOTHING. February 28 2025. Not gas. Not milk. Not something on a gaming app. Not a penny spent. (Only option in a crisis is local small mom and pop. Nothing. Else.) Promise me. Commit. 1 day. 1 day to scare the shit out of them that they don't get to follow the bullshit executive orders. They don't get to be cowards. If they do, it costs. It costs.

Then, if you can join me for Phase 2. March 7 2025 thtough March 14 2025? No Amazon. None. 1 week. No orders. Not a single item. Not one ebook. Nothing. 1 week. Just 1.

If you live outside the USA boycott US products on February 28 2025 and stand in solidarity with us and also join us for the week of no Amazon.

Are you with me?

Spread the word.

[conspiracyofcrazy]

Screw it. I'm adding another musician because girls are badass: the mayor of Boston, Massachusetts in the US is a very good pianist for an amateur. She confessed that playing with the symphony made her parents more proud than when she was elected mayor. She has played publicly several times during her mayorship, but the Boston Symphony Orchestra is top tier world class - and she was flawless

my 6yo piano student: did you KNOW that girls can marry girls and BOYS can marry boys? But they can’t do that romantic dance together when one has a rose in their mouth, because only boys can play the guitar :(

me: 👁️👄👁️well actually, girls can definitely play guitar??

6yo: WAIT REALLY?? :O

[conspiracyofcrazy]

Introduce her to Charo!!! She has been judged to be the greatest flamenco guitarist in the world - TWICE! She's been performing for over 50 years and is funny and oh, so very girly: big hair, sparkles, fluffy dresses. She's magnificent!

my 6yo piano student: did you KNOW that girls can marry girls and BOYS can marry boys? But they can’t do that romantic dance together when one has a rose in their mouth, because only boys can play the guitar :(

me: 👁️👄👁️well actually, girls can definitely play guitar??

6yo: WAIT REALLY?? :O

[conspiracyofcrazy]

Source

Source

[conspiracyofcrazy]

when people pop off with some ass take like "why should I have to put my pronouns in my profile or signature or whatever, my name is Tom and I have short hair and am wearing an oxford shirt in my profile pic, figure it out" I always think

so do you just not talk to people from other countries for your job, ever?

like, some people don't, and you can follow the flowchart to a different part of the argument about why pushing back about pronouns is stupid, but I e-mail people in Singapore and Dubai and Japan and India every day. A lot of those people have names that are probably their local equivalent of "Tom," but I have never seen them before and I have no idea if that's a girl's name or a boy's name. They usually have profile pics too. I don't know how common short hair is for women or long hair is for men in their country. I don't know if that style of shirt is more common for men or more common for women. I'm not writing this from some homogenous whitebread oasis, either, I live in New York City, it's just simply not possible for me to know the common names in every language of every country where the people I need to work with, live.

just put your stupid pronouns in your signature, some exasperated project manager in Mumbai will one day appreciate it

[conspiracyofcrazy]

[conspiracyofcrazy]

As a former resident of purgatory, myself, people really are wild.

Sometimes you get pulled over on Michigan Avenue because a passenger was peeing off your trolley into traffic and suddenly everyone is protecting the groom from his bad decisions.

Sometimes you get yelled at for other people's poor decisions and sometimes you get tipped two weeks worth of pay just for doing your job. Sometimes, the guy who was supposed to tip you forgot the cash in his hotel room and he buys you a much appreciated pizza instead.

Sometimes they try to haggle the price with you and sometimes you use your employee discount for someone who actually deserves it.

You get sob stories and you get stories that make you sob.

I was running early on a free trolley route and had 15 minutes to spare in front of the Field Museum. I pointed out a ladybug on the window to a little boy who was patiently waiting with his mother on the trolley. He absolutely lost his shit. The boy was on the autism spectrum (which I knew nothing about at the time) and had been bitten by an Asian ladybug at the botanical garden the week before. I had been reading about the new ladybugs and taught him how to distinguish between the two (more orange and less round). And his mother thought I was an angel. And the little boy helped the ladybug out the window so she wouldn't get lost. I have a kid on the spectrum now. When people help him, I think they are angels too.

I worked at an art supply store in the furniture department. Part of my job was lugging the stuff out to the customers' cars. Sometimes you get yelled at, sometimes you get dismissed as the help, and sometimes a customer remembers that you aren't allowed to receive tips so they put clementines in all the pockets of your apron while you are ratchet strapping down an even bigger easel than the last two for them.

Getting cursed at for doing your job safely and legally gets tired. But the little niceties I'll remember forever. And the camaraderie of your fellow inmates is irreplaceable.

Actually thinking about my time spent in purgatory, aka “the service industry”, I had some wild fucking events over the course of a decade.

There was the time a bride decided she didn’t want to go through with the wedding and tried to make her escape through the back kitchens of the venue and wound up sitting out back in the drizzling rain, bumming cigarettes from the delivery drivers, pristine white dress turning to mulch as she sat on an over turned catering crate. After a good half hour the groom came and found her and asked if she was okay. When she said she wasn’t sure if she wanted to go through with it he just nodded and said she should get out the rain because it was cold. The two of them ended up going back inside together, skipped the wedding part and basically had the most expensive party of their lives with all their friends and family.

There was another bride who could never decide on place settings, so in the end just turned to the coordinator and said “surprise me”. So we mismatched everything and called it “boho chic”. She loved it.

There was the groom who got caught in our supply closet during the late night reception…with the best man. And then there was also the father of the bride who absconded with the mother of the groom and had to be asked nicely to put their clothes back on and get out of the wine cellar.

At the same wedding.

There was the drunk best man who proposed to me using an umbrella cocktail and told me he was heartbroken when I told him I was flattered but married. He wore it behind his ear the rest of the night dancing like a mad man and telling anyone who would listen about “the one that got away”.

There was the Indian wedding with 800 guests. We rotated them in batches of 200 to fit them between spaces. All I can remember is never having enough drinks to hand out.

There was the arch bishop who only liked his coffee ground by hand because the effort of the worker “made it taste better”.

There was the time I took out the crystal drop of a chandelier with a champagne cork because the runners shook up the bottles for a joke.

There was the funeral party where the body couldn’t be delivered to the crematorium because the crematorium caught on fire.

There was the other funeral where a fist fight broke out over something our Jeanie said to our Mary 40 years ago, but then it turned out Mary was the one who said it.

There was the wedding where in a room of 200 people, the bride and groom only had eyes for each other.

There was the christening where the godmother kept crying to me over mocktails because she never thought she could love something as much as she loved “that bald little head”.

There was the old man at the wedding who came alone and smiled very kindly at everyone and always said please and thank you and who told myself and a coworker he’d been married to his wife for over 60 years and how she would have loved to see these two finally tie the not. She’d only passed the week before. He’d brought a picture of her so she could enjoy it in spirit.

There was the really tragic funeral where everyone kept hugging each other and saying “I love you” and us staff had to take frequent breaks to breathe because grief is tangible but so is love.

There were the times when nothing in particular happened at all, but they stand out so much because everyone there was happy.

Of course there was also the times when someone threw up on your shoes, or you got groped while serving the table, or someone was rude or snide because you were “the help”.

People are wild.

[conspiracyofcrazy]

Former Minnesota Vikings punter, Chris Kluwe, who was blacklisted from the league for standing up for marriage equality, speaks at a city council meeting where he calls Trump a Nazi. He is subsequently arrested and carried out by police.

[conspiracyofcrazy]

My husband and I have been watching Twin Peaks for a couple of weeks. We weren't that interested or able to watch when it originally came out. It's so fucking weird and unhinged. I adore it. Also, the opening credits are sooooo fucking long. And dull. It's like being reminded of life before everyone having internet and cell phones. Shit was slow. There were no other options. And this man, this adorable chocolate Easter bunny of a man is unflappable, enigmatic, and just as weird as the residents of Twin Peaks.

If you have a few spare days, please watch Twin Peaks.

Kyle MacLachlan by John Midgley 

[conspiracyofcrazy]

“Pratchett went back to older throwaway jokes (like dwarves being apparently unisex) and used them as metaphors to discuss social change, racial assimilation, and other complex issues, while reexamining the species he’d thrown in at the margins of his world simply because they existed at the margins of every other fantasy universe. If goblins and orcs and trolls could think, then why were they always just there to be slaughtered by the heroes? And if the heroes slaughtered sentient beings en masse, how heroic exactly were they? It was a long overdue start on redressing issues long swept under the rug by a parade of Tolkien successors who never thought of anyone green and slimy as anything but a notch on the protagonist’s sword, and much of the urgency in Pratchett’s last few books seemed to be related to them. “There’s only one true evil in the world,” he said through his characters. “And that’s treating people like they were things.” And in the last of his “grown-up” Discworld books, that idea is shouted with the ferocity of those who have only a few words left and want to make them count. Goblins are people. Golems are people. Dwarves are people, and they do not become any less people because they decide to go by the gender they know themselves to be instead of the one society forces on them. Even trains might be people, and you’ll never know one way or the other unless you ask them, because treating someone like they’re a person and not a thing should be your default. And the only people who cling to tradition at the expense of real people are sad, angry dwellers in the darkness who don’t even understand how pathetic they are, clutching and grasping at the things they remember without ever understanding that the world was never that simple to begin with. The future is bright, it is shining, and it belongs to everyone.”

— John Seavey, The Evolution of the Disc (via pornosophical)

[conspiracyofcrazy]

I've read conflicting things. Mostly, it seems to be a scanner to identify spam, phishing, or unwanted dick pics in messenger. The main issue with it seems to be that it was installed without anyone's permission.

I've uninstalled it on my Google Pixel phone. If I start getting dick pics from anyone other than my husband, I'll let you know

hey folks if you have an android phone: google shadow installed a "security app".

I had to go and delete it myself this morning.

[conspiracyofcrazy]

In regards of the Trump government scraping all trans inclusion in its queer information portion of its websites I have made this thing. Spread the word. Don't let them pretend we never existed.

P.S: Don't like! Reblog! <3

EDIT: Well this got a lot of attention! I got a few users asking to print or repost my art and I am unimaginably grateful to everyone's interest, especially since it's a really simple drawing I made on a whim haha! Anyone who is looking to print these out to hang or hand out or repost on another platform is free to do so, although I ask you to credit me and let people know it's from my Tumblr profile! If anyone wishes to do anything else with my art or post and wants to clarify what I consent to then they can message me privately and I'll explain! <333 all my love to my queer siblings

EDIT: I made an LGBTQIA+ version with a focus on trans and intersex folks, it's on my pinned if you prefer this version of the acronym.

[conspiracyofcrazy]

Met an old teacher today and we got talking about ‘the good old times’ and ten minutes into the conversation I jokingly said the one regret I have from middle school is that I never won anything at her magnificent tombolas? Because, like, she used to hold this game about once a month so we’d learn the numbers in French and it was never big prizes, but as a 12-yo I desperately craved them - a cactus-shaped eraser, a bright blue notebook with slightly larger-than-usual squares, a set of coloured pens - and never ever got a single one of them. 

(Actually spent a good few months thinking I was genetically unlucky and researching ancient family curses with my grandma.) 

So today I don’t know what I was hoping for - nothing, really?

(I mean, that part of me that’s still twelve was probably expecting this sweet old woman to have a set of glitter stickers in her purse and just go ‘You know what, you’re right - I’ve been saving this one for you all these years, here you go’ but I’m a solidly rational person and I know that’s stupid.)

No, I thought we’d just laugh and it would be a good shared memory and that would be it. Instead, my teacher got flustered and a bit embarrassed and explained the game was rigged. It was never about learning French at all. She’d just noticed some kids couldn’t afford even basic stationery, so she’d buy a few half-fancy items every month with her own money just for them. She didn’t want them to feel different or left out. And obviously the way she used to walk around in the classroom, looking over our shoulders - it wasn’t to prevent cheating. It was because she was cheating herself, wanting to see which number a particular child needed to get a Minnie Mouse pencil case.

Guys - the world is fucked up, but so many people out there are just good and kind and humbly heroic it honestly gives me hope. 

It’ll be alright, you’ll see.

[conspiracyofcrazy]

Love local coffee shops. your “refugees are welcome here” sign goes really well with the one that says “bathrooms are for paying customers only”

[conspiracyofcrazy]

Passing was very important for a very long time. It's one thing to be an adult with autism in a world that doesn't understand or accept differences; it's a much harder, crueler world for a child.

My step father didn't understand and said that his step father beat the ADHD out of him. He's gone. And I'm glad he never met my son. My son was a fairy - erratic, prone to rage, charming, suffered terrible night terrors... My son has a therapist and medications to help him, now. No one believed me that he needed help until he wanted to kill himself in 2nd grade. It was horrible. And kids like my son were beaten, abandoned, locked away until very recently - and some still are...

Sometimes hiding is safest.

Hello tumblr I heard you like changeling stories

Edit: If you want a physical copy of this comic!