cleencutsbae - Tumblr blog

[cleencutsbae]

I wish I was dead and cold

[cleencutsbae]

put a gun to my head, count 1 2 3 ......

[cleencutsbae]

if home is where the heart is, I can confidently say that I am homeless.

[cleencutsbae]

How many times can the same thing break your heart?

[cleencutsbae]

Probably wouldn't want to kms so much if my dad didn't treat me like shit all the time.

[cleencutsbae]

Im not that 'clean $h aesthetic', I'm the messy one.

The type who uses dull bl@des to brutal|y rip my skin open.

The one with g0ry w0unds, filled with bacteria and poorly covered by band@ids.

There's a disgusting smell, dried blood, used band@ges and shaking hands.

My skin isn't covered in beautiful white patterns but deformed by purple and red lines.

There's only cruelty, brutality against myself.

A war without rules nor morals.

[cleencutsbae]

How to not want to die all the time, no borax no glue......

[cleencutsbae]

Holding it together so my parents don't have to sit at my funeral wondering what they did wrong.

[cleencutsbae]

I'm tired of acting stronger than I feel.

[cleencutsbae]

I tried to write down what I was feeling but somehow the paper stayed empty, and I could not have described it better.

[cleencutsbae]

maybe i wouldn’t have a raging cvtting addiction and ed if my dad loved me

[cleencutsbae]

will i always be this angry?

[cleencutsbae]

Existing is exhausting.

[cleencutsbae]

tired of pushing people away then find myself wondering why i am so lonely.

[cleencutsbae]

The burnt child,

Loves the fire.

[cleencutsbae]

I’m the glass house people are afraid to walk through.

[cleencutsbae]

BPD

Grieving the loss of someone I could have been if my childhood wasn't fucked