cillians-sweetheart

[cillians-sweetheart]

𝓟𝓮𝓻𝓼𝓮𝓬𝓾𝓽𝓸𝓻𝔂 ☣︎ Chapter 4

Description: Johnathan Crane x Patient Reader. An 18 year old girl suffers from a mental disorder that Dr Crane takes an interest in, but It isn't just the disorder that catches his eye. Their love becomes so strong it drives her dangerously mad... more mad then she or him could ever imagine. You will be questioning everything, even after the book...

ROMANCE + HORROR + SMUT STORY

No Batman and not everything about crane that's mentioned is correct to the actual character in DC.

TW: Violence, Sexual Content, Alcohol/Drug Use, Gore, Mental Illness, Parental Issues, Smut, Murder, Extreme Kinks (dom/crane, blood, choking, hair pulling, spanking, age gap, toys, dub-con and daddy kink) and Mention of Abuse, Assault and SA.

Not all warnings shown will be used in this exact chapter! Bold warnings are some to be expected throughout the chapter below!

I sit at the diner table, fidgeting with my finger nails as my mother pours herself a large amount of wine. Filling the glass to the rim.

"He's seems nice" My mother grins at me. "Dr Crane" She sits in the dining chair across the table from me. The dim light above us makes the room feel small and empty.

"He's alright"

"A handsome young man too"

"Not really" I lied.

"You know being negative all the time isn't going to make you better" She sets her wine glass down onto the table aggressively making bits spill out.

"I don't need to get better" I mumble while continuing to stare down at the table. The images from his office keep replaying in my mind.

"Everyone needs to get better sometimes. No one is perfect all the time."

"So why can't you accept me as I am" I look up at her.

"Because you are hurting people. That is not normal and not something any parent should accept Y/N. End of story."

"Dr Crane accepts me" I say with an undertone, rolling my eyes to the side.

"He has too. It's his job." I sigh and role my eyes again. Laying my head down onto the table.

"If you're gonna nap, you have a bed for that."

I slam my hand on the table and walk off to my room. I slam the door and lay down onto my bed. My bed folds around me as I grab a pillow and hug it in tightly to my chest. It comforting. I feel less alone. More protected. More loved. I close my eyes to try and think of something less stressful. My thoughts kept getting interrupted by remembering Dr Cranes touch. His hands all over my body. The thought just kept coming back. He haunted me. But I wanted to feel him again. I wanted him to make me feel good. When I tried to slip my hands between my legs I couldn't find that same feeling.

Why did I want him so suddenly, what was he doing to me.

And eventually after continuous hours I was able to fall asleep.

Wednesday

"Y/N get up" I am awoken by my mother bursting into my room. My brain takes a moment to comprehend what she had just said.

"What why" I groan.

"You have an appointment today. I just got off the phone with Dr Crane and he'd like to see you."

"Right now?"

"Soon, so get up. It's 11am." She closes my door and I rub my face with my hands. I roll off the bed and sit myself down at my desk. I stare at myself for a moment.

Bags under my eyes, redness in my cheeks, dryness in my lips. Like a corpse.

I then grab a mascara and add a thicker layer to my eyelashes. Then concealer, which I covered majority of my face in, and some light lipstick.

Once I am looking like a human again I just put a tight, black, long sleeved shirt and jeans.

"Okay let's go" I sigh, finding my mother in the kitchen. She picks through her purpose seemingly looking for something.

"Okay. And actually try to except his treatment would ya. He's a professional you need to trust him." She takes a wad of cash from her pocket and shoves it into her pocket like I didn't notice. But I did.

"Yeah okay. I have been doing the best I can" We sit in silence for a few minutes in the car.

"He seems confident in you, you know"

"What?"

"On the phone he sounded like this is something he can see you improving on"

I ignore her and stay silent the rest of the way. The familiar asylum comes into view.

"Y/N, welcome back. Dr Crane has been expecting you" A woman at the entrance says greeting me. "Right this way".

"I'll be waiting!" My mom yells to me while I walk off with the nurse.

I am outside his office once again. I wave of nausea and nervousness passes through me.

"Y/N." His eyes hold the same evilness since the last time I saw him "welcome back. Take a seat." He brings me over back to the dentist looking chair again. I already know what's going to happen.

He's going to touch me. He's gonna try to hurt me. Last time was just a trick so I'd trust him. He's really gonna do it this time.

My heart rate increases as I lay back. I take slow, long blinks.

"No need to be scared sweetheart. Not yet" He moves a stool in and sits down next to me. "Has anything new came up since our visit?"

"No"

"Trouble sleeping?"

"A bit, but it's manageable"

"And what is making it difficult to fall asleep? Anxiety, too much energy, daydreaming"

"Just anxiety.."

"About?"

"Everything. My mom, these appointments and everyone around me"

He scribbles my answers down.

"Do I make you anxious?" He asks leaning into me while bringing his stool closer.

"Everyone does"

"What about me makes you anxious?" I look at him thinking of what to say. "You can tell me sweetheart. I don't bite."

"I just haven't had the best experiences with doctors."

"Y/N do you ever feel as if you are going to harm yourself, the same way others would do to you?"

"No?"

"Perfect. We may have a way to treat you."

"How?"

"Isolation"

"How is that going to work? I don't live on my own yet"

Dr Crane stands from his stool and walks over behind his desk. He lifts a briefcase and comes back over to me. The briefcase lands down onto the chair next me. My face turns as he pulls out a mask that looks like it was make from a haystack. He quickly puts the mask over his face. "Wanna see a magic trick?" He presses a button and a gas fills the room. I don't even get enough time to react. My vision begins to blur, and shake. Dr Crane is no longer recognizable. Just a scarecrow, coming at me. Hands wrap around my neck, squeezing. I scream and try to grab his face but my body is too heavy. My arms, and legs become nothing but bags and bags of thick sand. I continue to scream. The scarecrow releases my neck just as I'm about to pass out and leaves the room.

I can still feel the tightness around my neck. Hands crawling over my entire body, pinching and poking. The air feels thick's and my body is heavy. I scream and scream waiting for this to end. The skin of my throat burns from the screams, echoing through my hollow seeming body. Hands reach up from all around me, holding my body down and poking; prodding at me.

"What was that! What is going on!?" My mother yells running up the hallway. Dr Crane comes out of his office. My screams still in the distance.

"I will have to have Y/N admitted, our treatments seem to have taken a turn."

"What?! Let me see my daughter!" She tries to push past him but is grabbed by two security guards. "Let me see my daughter!" She screams and kicks. "You can't keep her here!". Her voice fades off as she's dragged out of the building.

[cillians-sweetheart]

𝓟𝓮𝓻𝓼𝓮𝓬𝓾𝓽𝓸𝓻𝔂 ☣︎ Chapter 3

Description: Johnathan Crane x Patient Reader. An 18 year old girl suffers from a mental disorder that Dr Crane takes an interest in, but It isn't just the disorder that catches his eye. Their love becomes so strong it drives her dangerously mad... more mad then she or him could ever imagine. You will be questioning everything, even after the book...

ROMANCE + HORROR + SMUT STORY

No Batman and not everything about crane that's mentioned is correct to the actual character in DC.

TW: Violence, Sexual Content, Alcohol/Drug Use, Gore, Mental Illness, Parental Issues, Smut, Murder, Extreme Kinks (dom/crane, blood, choking, hair pulling, spanking, age gap, toys, dub-con and daddy kink) and Mention of Abuse, Assault and SA.

Not all warnings shown will be used in this exact chapter! Bold warnings are some to be expected throughout the chapter below!

Sunday

My mother seats herself in the waiting room while a nurse walks me down the familiar hall. I was let in without question, as Dr Crane said. I didn't even have to wait.

"Dr Crane?" The nurse knocks gently. "Y/N is here." Her voice was soft, and delicate.

"Come in" I hear him say through the door. The nurse opens the door and closes it behind me. "You've returned" He says looking up from his paper work.

"You told me to." I approached his desk slowly and cautiously.

"I did. Just didn't know if you were going to obey me." He stands and comes around his desk with a long stride of his leg. "Over here, take a seat". He points to a dentist like chair in the corner of his office. Next to it, a small machine with many wires. I lift myself up and lie down. He pulls over a stool and sits next to me with a clipboard in his hand. "How have you been feeling since we've last spoke?"

"Fine, I guess..."

"Try again."

"I've been alright, the same as always. Nothing new"

"Gonna need more than that Y/N." he scribbles and looks back up to me.

"I've just been tired, and a little uneasy at some times with my thoughts. But I'm living.."

"How are things with your mother? Has she continued to nag you on these appointments since we last spoke?"

I never told him that.

"Only when we left last time and this morning" I wondered how he could've possible known something he wasn't there for. He must be able to read the energy.

"I see. Now does mommy ever try to hurt you? The same way others do?"

"No, not yet. I hide before she can or lock myself in a room if I get scared."

"Good. Mine did." He takes a deep breath. "Now Y/N, I want you to do me a favour and look down at your arm". I look down to see his hand wrapped on my arm. I hadn't even noticed.

"How did you do that?" I ask, shocked.

"Distraction. Now we're gonna try something even harder."

"What?"

"Touch without distraction". My face feels cold. Almost as cold as his hand on my bare skin. As he stares at me he slowly moves his hand up my arm. Remaining eye contact the whole time.

He stands as he reaches my shoulder. Getting closer to my neck every second. I feel my heart race and my skin lift with goosebumps. He knows I hate it but that's what makes him enjoy this more.

He's gonna strangle me

"How are you feeling now?" His voice is intimidating.

"I don't like it"

He's gonna strangle me

"And why's that" His hand moves across my collar bone, going lower towards my breast.

He's gonna strangle me

The instincts to protect myself emerge. I grab his hand and throw it off of myself. I begin hitting and pushing him away from me, screaming like a child. Before I'm even able to injure him he grabs my arms and pins them down along side of me. I can't fight his strength. I squirm and kick as he leans his body weight onto me, holding me down. "Y/N this isn't going to work unless you sit still and cooperate." He says with his teeth and jaw clenched. "Now tell me, why don't you like it?" He slams my wrists again onto the chair while his face holds an expression of anger.

"Let go of me! You'll never kill me!" I bite at him. Continuing to squirm.

"No one is going to kill you. Could you stop squirming so I can continue." His grip loosens slightly. "If I try to kill you, you can pound my head into the pavement, alright?" He said mockingly as my body quiets down and I nod. "Thank you" He sits and continues slipping his hand down my chest. I watch his big hand slowly slide underneath my shirt. He begins to press down on the bare flesh of my breast. "86" he says to himself, removing his hand and scribbling again on his clipboard. He then continues, pushing his stool down to the end of the chair. this time starting at my ankle. He moves his hand onto me gripping onto my ankle. The eye contact remains as he slowly moves up my leg. Once at my knee, he stops. "Bend your knees sweetheart." His voice; as smooth as water. I bend my knees, planting my feet down. He stands up from his stool and peers over me.

His hand still on my knee, he begins to move down my thigh. His grip is tight, occasionally squeezing as he went down. Dr Crane watched every moment my face made while also evaluating my leg movement's. I would try to look away but felt pressured to stare into his blue eyes. "You're doing so good Y/N." His hand reachers the bottom of my thigh. Without stopping he moves his hand down in between my thighs. His pace slows even more and my heart quickens. This felt wrong. I look away in embarrassment. He doesn't remove his hand but instead keeps moving it. Slowly. "Y/N. Look at me." I turn to look at him while little jolts shoot through my body. I use every muscle to stay as still as I could. Without noticing I look at away again. He grabs my face tightly in his other hand, turning me to look at him. "I didn't say you could look away. You look away when I am done." I watch his face. He is amused by watching me struggle. "The female anatomy is so interesting". I twitch below his hand as it moves along the thin fabric of my leggings. It begins to get more difficult to compose my face. I've never had such an experience with a man before; And I hated to admit that I liked it. I didn't want it to stop.

"How do you feel now?" He smirks moving his hand slightly faster, with a stiffer grip. His face held a look of pure obsession.

"Fine" I manage to say through my nervous breath.

"Try again."

"Good" I exhale heavily.

"You just needed to be touched by a man. Thats all." Dr Crane smirked unsettlingly. His lips separated as he began breathing from his mouth while his stare remained in my eyes. Then his eye begins to slide down my body. "You seem less frightened but your heart rate is still the same"

"How can you tell my heart beat?"

"Oh trust me. I can feel it."

He then stops. Removing both his hands from my face and between my legs. "That will be all for today sweetheart. I will walk you back to your mommy" he writes on his clipboard then gives me his hand to help me off the chair. "Right this way."

My legs still feel shaky. Along with my breath as I realize what had just happened. I don't know if I should feel threatened or afraid by his actions or pleased. May this treatment be strange but maybe it's helping. Maybe I just need to be touched by a man, like he said.

"Oh Dr Crane, good you're here" my mother stands. "How is she doing?"

"Y/N is delusional."

"What-"

"Persecutory delusional disorder" He interrupts.

"And what the hell is that" my mother asks concerned crossing her arms.

"She believes that she is being targeted or attacked by someone. To her, everyone plans on harming, or even planning to kill her. That is why she does what she does. It is all just the human instinct defending against her delusions."

"She's hallucinating people are trying to kill her?!"

He sighs. "Yes"

"Ca- can this be treated?"

"In my care, yes."

"Thank you doctor, really"

"Not a problem" his gaze turns to me. Evilness in his eyes.

"Come on Y/N, let's go home" I continue to look at him for a moment before going with my mother. He doesn't take his eyes off me until I've left the building.

[cillians-sweetheart]

𝓟𝓮𝓻𝓼𝓮𝓬𝓾𝓽𝓸𝓻𝔂 ☣︎ Chapter 2

Description: Johnathan Crane x Patient Reader. An 18 year old girl suffers from a mental disorder that Dr Crane takes an interest in, but It isn't just the disorder that catches his eye. Their love becomes so strong it drives her dangerously mad... more mad then she or him could ever imagine. You will be questioning everything, even after the book...

ROMANCE + HORROR + SMUT STORY

No Batman and not everything about crane that's mentioned is correct to the actual character in DC.

TW: Violence, Sexual Content, Alcohol/Drug Use, Gore, Mental Illness, Parental Issues, Smut, Murder, Extreme Kinks (dom/crane, blood, choking, hair pulling, spanking, age gap, toys, dub-con and daddy kink) and Mention of Abuse, Assault and SA.

Not all warnings shown will be used in this exact chapter! Bold warnings are some to be expected throughout the chapter below!

Dr Crane leans in forward, making the air between us heavier. His eyes beamed into mine waiting for my answer as he took in a large inhale. I didn't want to tell him what truly frightened me as it was pathetic, but he seems to know when I lie. He will interrogate me until he gets every bit of me figured out. That's what made him powerful.

"Being touched." I look down at my hands beginning to pick at my skin again. I feel the air lighten as he leans back into his chair, knotting his fingers together.

"Have you ever heard of exposure therapy Y/N?" he asks confidently.

"No"

"Well I think if we can expose you to touch slowly over time, we can fix this fear of yours, and trust me, fear is my specialty." His tone grew from reassuring to devious as he spoke.

"Will that make me better?"

"You feel people want to harm you, yes?" I nod. "Overcoming your fear of physical touch will make you less afraid of what people may intend to do to you. You think everyone wants to hurt you, but when you're unafraid of touch, you will be unafraid of these peoples actions. Making you stronger than all of them without even trying too." His brilliance and quick thought really sinks in. "This will be a success treatment if you can put in the effort and gain enough strength to try. Are you willing to try?"

"Yes, sure"

"Have you ever been touched by a man before?" His voice is low and calm. I feel tingles in my stomach, not knowing how to respond. I questioned myself if it was normal not to have been touched at my age yet or not.

"Not.. really" I answer quietly. Feeling small under his power as he stands from his chair, looking down onto me.

"Then I'd get some practice in. Next appointment we will be starting." He came from around his desk and reached his hand down to help lift me from the chair. I hesitated at first then slowly reach up to meet his hand with mine. His hand was deathly cold, yet soft, and much larger than mine. He walks behind me and guides me out from his office. " I'd like to see you within the next few days. Week maximum. Just come in and say your name and they'll let you in." Dr Crane whispers as he gets very close in behind me. So close I can feel his breath on my skin.

"Okay"

"See you soon sweetheart" He opens the door and walks me back to meet my mother. Who had been sitting, picking at her hair and her leg shaking.

"Hey!" She jumps up noticing me. "How did it go?!" I turn behind me to see Dr Crane was already gone. I was hoping he had an answer for my unstable mother. The situation has had her on edge. She becomes hateful or overly emotional every time I'm around. I wish I just had an excuse already to get her to lay off.

"It was fine."

"Does he have any ideas yet?" She asks eagerly while speaking what sounds like 1000 words per minute. "He's supposed to be the one of the best please tell me he does".                                                                 

"I don't know yet, he didn't say. I'll be going back in a few days maybe then we'll know why I have basic human instincts" She rolls her eyes. "To be honest this is all stupid, I don't need to see a fucking psychiatrist-"

"Y/N normal children do not behave the way you do. I have never seen a child as juvenile as you and it is sickening. You don't even feel like my daughter sometimes. It's like you become a whole different person, a fucking demon." She interrupts, completely changing her tone.

"I'm not a child."

"Well you sure act like one! I've had enough! You need help and you are going to get it. End of story." She grips my forearm in her hand and pulls me out of the asylum into the parking lot.

My mother and I were silent the rest of the way home. I stared out the car window with my head in my hand as soft music played through the radio. I thought of the exposure therapy.

It all feels like an excuse for Dr Crane to poke and prick me with needles. Stealing my blood. My DNA. Draining all my blood and filling me with toxins to kill me. This is what my mom hired him to do. To kill her disgrace of a child.

My heart throbs in my chest. The air around me grew heavy as I felt a negative energy hit me like a brick.

She wants me dead.

My mother parks the car as we pull into the driveway. She doesn't get out but instead sighs and looks over at me.

"Y/N" I ignore her. "Can you look at me please?" I slowly turn my head to look at her guilty face. "I'm sorry about snapping, you know I get stressed about these things."

"Then let me do it on my own"

"I don't think it's healthy you go through this alone"

"I'm already unhealthy so what's the difference?" I say irritated from her narcism. 

"I'm your mother Y/N."

"And I'm an adult now. The only way I'll learn life is to live it" I open the car door and slightly kick it open. My mother stays in the car until I'm at the door. I wiggle the key around into the door while she comes closer to me.

"I want to come to your appointments until he can figure out a solution. Then you can knock yourself out. Go, don't go, I don't care." I use my shoulder to push open the front door. I kick my shoes off at the wall and go straight to my room. Not looking back at her once.

I begin to think about the day I would go back. I would just ditch the whole thing but I feel I don't have a choice. Dr Crane's look seemed serious when he told me to return. Though he always looked serious this felt more intense.

If I disobeyed him he'd tie me to an electric chair. He'd touch me, touch every part of my body. Picking and probing at my skin. Licking and kissing my lips. This was a bad idea. I can't go back. I'm not going back.

Sunday, I'll go sunday. It's only 4 days away, no more than a week as he demanded.

I grab my sketchbook from the drawer of my nightstand, flipping through the filled pages. Seeing my drawings and analyzing the details is my way of distracting myself. It gave me a sense of self worth seeing I'm able to do at least something. I continue flipping until I come across a plank sheet.

I dig once again through the drawer for a pencil. I grab one and begin sketching light, messy lines.

He is going to touch me

The angles and shapes of the drawing begin to form.

He is going to touch me

A lady, with delicate eyes and plump lips.

Dr Crane is going to pinch me. He is going to touch my face. Dr Crane is going to pull my hair. He is going to kiss my lips. Dr Crane is going to stab me. He is going to touch my sweetness. Dr Crane is going to kill me.

I slam the sketch book shut and throw it back into the drawer, hurdling myself into a ball. The mixed thoughts. The mixed feelings. I couldn't handle it anymore. It rotted my fragile brain.

[cillians-sweetheart]

𝓟𝓮𝓻𝓼𝓮𝓬𝓾𝓽𝓸𝓻𝔂 ☣︎ Chapter 1

Description: Johnathan Crane x Patient Reader. An 18 year old girl suffers from a mental disorder that Dr Crane takes an interest in, but It isn't just the disorder that catches his eye. Their love becomes so strong it drives her dangerously mad... more mad then she or him could ever imagine.

ROMANCE + HORROR + SMUT STORY

No Batman and not everything about crane that's mentioned is correct to the actual character in DC.

TW: Violence, Sexual Content, Alcohol/Drug Use, Gore, Mental Illness, Parental Issues, Smut, Murder, Extreme Kinks (dom/crane, blood, choking, hair pulling, spanking, age gap, toys, dub-con and daddy kink) and Mention of Abuse, Assault and SA.

Not all warnings shown will be used in this exact chapter! Bold warnings are some to be expected throughout the chapter below!

"Y/N?" A nurse asks, coming from around the corner. "Dr Crane is ready for you now."

I sat and rotted in solitude on the playground watching as a group of eyes turned to my direction. The group of girls laughed to themselves staring in my direction. Their eyes held disgust, piercing through me. I glanced up and down at my little pink sundress, then at my hair and then at my hands. I couldn't figure out what was so wrong about me, and why they laughed and stared.

As I made eye contact with one of the girls she began to approach me. Her hands clenched in fists and her friends standing alongside her. I felt the blood begin to drain from my face. My hands and chest went cold. In instinct I jumped to my feet and sprinted to the girl, grabbing her hair and pushing her to the ground. I repeatedly smashed her face into the pavement until the area around her was red. All her friends ran and teachers bolted to me, pulling me off her. So many sounds and so many feelings at once. It was over they all were going to kill me. Right then and there.

My 6 year old self sat in the principal's office confused as to why I was there. I didn't do anything wrong, I was protecting myself.

When I was told the girl just wanted to play I was in udderly disbelief. That is not what I saw in her, she was going to hurt me and I don't regret nor feel bad for what I had done.

Now I am 18, finally able to see one of the best physiatrists in my area. I don't think I need to see one, but my mother believes there is something wrong with me, something that the other physiatrists couldn't figure out.

"Do you want me to come with you?" My mother asks standing up with me, reaching her arm out to mine.

"I'll be fine."

"Oh, okay" she sits back down onto the leather waiting room chair. I was shy so I always liked my mom to be in the appointment with me, but I find when she is, I never get to express what has actually happened. It's always her side of the story. That her daughter is sick and distorted like some monster.

I follow the nurse down the dull, prison like hallway. At the end of the hall she stops and opens a door motioning me to go in with a gentle grin. I went in to see a handsome, dark haired man sitting at a large desk with his hands folded, staring straight through me. A desk and chair so big it made him look small.

"Come, sit" he orders calmly. I slowly walk in sitting in a chair across him. He leans back and lifts a piece of paper from his desk, scanning through it. "Y/N?"

"yes" I respond quietly.

"Great, And you are 18? Correct?"

"yes"

"Still fresh" he nods while lying the paper back down with an unsettling facial expression.

I ignored that comment.

"So what's the problem dear" His passionate blue eyes looked deeply into mine, making it feel hard to speak. Making the air feel heavy. Like I couldn't breathe right.

"My mom thinks there is something wrong with me... but there isn't really."

"Then there is definitely something wrong." I look at him in confusion. "Usually people who think there's nothing wrong with them, have something wrong with them. So, what did you do." His eyes turn to a look of interest, and obsession.

"I didn't do anything"

"Yes you did. What did you do to cause your mother to send you here. Big event, tragic moments?"

"Well she always tells me to talk about an event from elementary school, all because I attacked a girl but it was because she was gonna hurt me. I was just standing up for myself."

"Hurt you how?" His eyes narrowed.

"Hit me, yell at me, take me away... I don't know. It wasn't that serious"

"Was this the only occurrence you attacked someone?" He licks his lips, still making eye contact with me; Though my eyes were looking down.

"No, it's happened quite a few times"

"And because these people were going to hurt you?" He pushes his glasses up from his nose.

"Yes"

"And what made you think they were going to hurt you?"

I didn't like talking about this, I didn't want to be here in the first place. He's asking too many questions and I just want to go home.

"They either had a look on their face or they came running at me. it's like they become possessed and they want to rip me in half."

"What kind of look did they have?" He takes a pen and a clip board into his pale hands.

"An evil look, they looked angry"

"And in response what did you do?" He scribbles on his page. His eyes staring through his eyebrows.

"I got them before they got me."

He looks up at me, interested.

"Give me an example"

"Well one of the times when I was elementary school I had to... beat a girls face into the cement. Another time in middle school I stabbed a pencil through a boy's hand. So he couldn't grab me.. and choke me."

"You're a murderous little thing aren't you" he says admiring my words. "Tell me more" he says hungrily.

"Oh. Um.. another time a girl was looking at me strangely and when I asked her why she just kept calling me crazy over and over, even though I'm not. She was going to hit me. I-I got scared so I pushed my fingers into her eyes."

"Now why do you think these people were so mad with you?"

"I don't know, that's what I've been wondering for years but everyone always is. It wont stop they wont. Go. Away."

"Well I'm not mad at you"  He says calmly, leaned back in his chair with his fingers crossed in his lap.

"Yeah sure" I say looking down to my lap.

"Y/N. Look at me." He says seriously. I look up.  His ice blue eyes stare at me through his glasses.  I feel an overcoming power come through me. His stare feels so intimidating yet enchanting. "I wouldn't lie to you."

"You sound like my mother. This isn't gonna help me". I picked at the skin on my fingers.

He sighs and rubs his eyes. "I imagine we can figure something out sweetheart, I am the best you're gonna get."

"Then what's wrong with me?"

"Well I'll need to do some physicalexams along with talking to you more about these situations you're having, because 'hunny you do have something wrong'" He said that last part with an irritating, sarcastic form of 'empathy'. I stared waiting for him to say more. "But it's okay, no one is perfect. Everyone's got something wrong with them" he smirks lightly. "Just some of us are better at hiding it than others."

"What's wrong with you?" I ask softly, not knowing if it was a good idea to ask that.

"That's not for you to worry about sweetheart" he says delicately with a smirk. "But I am curious, have you always used violence as a way to solve these situations?"

"Mostly... yeah"

"Y/N, what are you scared of?" He changes the subject with a stern look on his face.

"Oh, um..." I think for a moment starring down at my hands. "Drowning, I guess?"

"What are you really scared of."

Full book on my Wattpad! But all chapters will be posted here, just be sure to keep yourself updated!