chil02

[chil02]

Niall: Harry and I are so close we even share a toothbrush.

Harry: We what?

[chil02]

Carlos: Why won't the damn FIA leave us alone?

Lando: Maybe they are homophobic.

Carlos: We're not gay, Lando.

Lando: We're not??

[chil02]

Oscar: What are you writing?

Lando: red bull wants to know what kind of improvements we have made to the car. I'm letting them know it's private information.

Oscar, looking over Lando's shoulder: This just says 'fuck around and find out' in calligraphy

[chil02]

Liam: *seeing the empty cookie bag*

Liam: How many, roughly, did you eat?

Nial: ...I ate them gently.

Liam: niall…

[chil02]

Lando: So... I see you’ve been spending a lot of time with Rebecca lately.

Carlos: No, Lando, it’s not what it looks like, I swear.

Lando: Oh, really? So no reason for me to get jealous?

Carlos: I promise! Rebecca and I are just dating, okay? She’s my girlfriend

Lando: So there are no best-friend-feelings involved?

Carlos: You are still my one and only best friend! She’s just the love of my life, nothing more.

Lando: But I’m still the platonic love of your life, right?

Carlos: Of course!

The rest of the grid: What the f—

[chil02]

Carlos: Horrible things kept happening to me, it’s like I have bad luck.

Oscar: Carlos, you don’t have bad luck. Bad things happen to you because you’re a dumbass.

[chil02]

Lando: Carlos, for the love of God, PLEASE go to the hospital.

Carlos: Excuse me, Lando. Is this YOUR appendicitis? OUR appendicitis? No? So STAY OUT OF THIS

[chil02]

Policeman: What are your names?

Lando: Don’t tell him Carlos

Policeman, writing down: Carlos, and?

Carlos: Fucking damn it Lando!

[chil02]

Louis: As a responsible adult-

Niall: *chuckles*

Louis: … As a responsible adult—

[chil02]

Store worker, over the intercom: Would Liam Payne please make his way to the front desk?

Liam, arriving at the front desk: Hi, is there a problem?

Store worker, pointing to Harry and Niall: I believe these belong to you?

Harry and Niall, simultaneously: We got lost

Liam: I didn't even bring you guys with me-

[chil02]

Harry: (pushing a door that clearly says pull)

Louis: you’re not pushing hard enough

[chil02]

Niall: Louis! You're forcing me to be the voice of reason here and it is NOT a good look on me!

[chil02]

Liam: What the fuck did y'all do???

Louis:

Harry:

Niall:

Zayn:

Liam, closing the door: Guess I'll never know what they've done...

[chil02]

Zayn: I can't take it anymore!

Liam: Then leave!

Zayn:

Liam:

Niall: Alright, I'm about to leave-

Zayn & Liam: YOU STAY THERE, NIALL

[chil02]

Liam: You need to lie still. You’ve lost a lot of blood.

Harry: I didn’t lose it. I know exactly where it is *Points to puddle of blood*

[chil02]

Zayn: I have the sharpest memory here - name one time I forgot something!

Niall: You left me, Liam, Louis and Harry in a Walmart parking lot at 2am a day ago.

Zayn: I did that on purpose, try again.

[chil02]

Liam: I'm gonna ask you to be respectful.

Louis: I will politely decline.