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what true purpose could i yearn for when the dawn's so huge and the whiskey so sweet? when the two of us are out there i fear nothin' could chase my smile away. i ain't ever found that company round any folk 'cept for him.

-@cowpoke-confessions

My son, there is nothing wrong with having close friends, but you cannot let your brothers in Christ get in the way of your future wife or your journey with Christ.

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hamson... man...

What?

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dear sir, i fear i may never reckon myself a family man. who am i to raise a chil' when i might never grow up in myself? there's somethin' to be said about a man makin' children when he frets himself still a boy. what if the only company i ever need is my partner out on the plains? what sorta man does that make me?

-@cowpoke-confessions

My son, you forget your true purpose on earth. You need more than just a "partner out on the plains", you need a wife. It makes you a sinful man.

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good mister, i'm not quite sure who i hold myself to be. why is it this world seeks to tie me down like some sorta stallion? i fear there'll never be someone for me to hold while im above snakes. it makes me all-overish to think about needing to return home to some woman someday

-@cowpoke-confessions

My son, it is your duty as a Christian to start a family. Whether that be on the road or in a house is your choice, but neglecting your earthly duty is a sin.

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well who’s to insinuate I’m not a man for women. I find myself in Ms Jenny’s house as much as any single boy, but chasin’ the saddle seems to satisfy my soul far more than any young gal. I do fret for who will hold me by the fire and long into the night, but women ain’t for the bulls nor the desert

-@cowpoke-confessions

My son, you must make a choice then. If you are a man for women, you must find one and marry her and have a Good Pious Family, or you can return to your "saddle chasing" as you called it. You should not be wishing to be held by the fire, but to hold someone. Find a woman who needs her masculine ways tamed and marry her.

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Now listen sir I ain’t usually one to turn to religion for such n such like this but i must ask… how is it a man can’t find himself a wife even when husbands are in high demand. It’s not even there’s a shortage of young ladies but i fear none of them perk my interest enough to chase ‘em. Now father, is it a sin for a good man to ignore his earthy duty to start a family?

-@cowpoke-confessions

My son, starting a family is not a young man's only job, especially since you still have a bit of time before a wife is a necessity for a fine young man such as yourself. Give yourself time to gain interest in women, until then, focus on God and personal growth. I never found myself quite interested in women, so I devoted myself only to God. Keep an eye out for a pious young woman, though, God needs more healthy Catholic babies on this fine earth.

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hanson

You forget yourself, my daughter. What did you mean to say?

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Apologies for the absence, congregation. I was hard at work fighting the devil.

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My son, I am on hiatus and @god-offical is a heretic and a false God. Pay it no mind.

who knew impersonating the most important figure in several world religions would be a hit on the gay website

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Hey dudes! My names bronon, welcome to my radical blog! I'm all about being the best bro I can, to both my dudes at home and the big G-man up in the sky! Narly! Welcome to my wicked blog, I'm here to reach my truest brotential and get closest to the most radical dudes of all time! Wicked!

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Yeah, father bro. Its been rough. I've never had such an uphill battle with my radical relationship with the G-man, but dude, its just been so not tubular. Just- all of my dudes and bros support my relegious journey, but sometimes I miss their freedom. And like- I know envy and whatever are wicked deadly bro, as far as sins go, and I dont wanna go to hell cause thats just mad not chill, but, like, you know? I'm just totally glad you're here to lead me on the righteous path, bro. Mad chill of you. Respect.

Sonbro. I am so happy you are betting your relationship with God. Your dudes and bros may have "freedom" but that freedom is only freedom to sin. I can forgive your envy so long as you work on it.

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hey daddy…… me again……🥱🥱

I’m going to touch you.

No.

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hey babe i mean daddy i mean father have you read unholyverse, your holy dicklessness?

No.

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can you put a catholic inside me

No.

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Father I'm have Ng señx incmunecraft

Sinner.

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father I have a big fat crush on a woman

If you are a man, pray and ask God if she is the woman for you. If you are a woman, marry a man.

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heh…. yeha I’ll repent……… I’m on my knees, praying to god…… heh……………… guakc guak guak guak guak guak PLAP PLAP PLAP PLAP god is pregnant. PLAP PLAPPLAP PLAP PLAP FAP FAP FAP FAP CLANK CLANK CLANK CLANK CLANK UGHHHHH

There is no hope for you.