carnivore-clown

[carnivore-clown]

the year was Two Thousand and twenty-four. I took a puff of my Electronic-Cigarette, inhaling the vapours. my mobile terminal buzzed in my pocket, a flat slab of microchips and glossy touchscreen. I ignored it....... probably another Electronic-Mail

[carnivore-clown]

feline figures (after fabergé)

[carnivore-clown]

Decided to say fuck it to my congestion. Closed myself in the guest bathroom, blocked out all ventilation, turned my massive humidifier on full blast and ran myself the hottest bath i can stand.

This is my enclosure. I live here now. I have recreated the water cycle in a matter of minutes and can finally breathe.

[carnivore-clown]

[carnivore-clown]

lost focus & had a consensual workplace relationship

[carnivore-clown]

making my humidifier and dehumidifier participate in a cruel and pointless war

[carnivore-clown]

What if I started posting exclusively in italics, thereby inducing you to read it in a soft gentle inside voice JUMPSCARE JUMPSCARE 1000 DEVILS NIGHTMARES FOREVER

[carnivore-clown]

I hope Hank doesn’t find out about my meth business lmao

[carnivore-clown]

*throws ibuprofen on the ground and watches the aging tumblr populous peck at them like chickens*

[carnivore-clown]

Happy 23rd birthday, Dipper and Mabel! 🌲🌠

[carnivore-clown]

Asking for directions

[carnivore-clown]

Sorry! We threw out your luggage because it was giving the airplane a tummy ache

[carnivore-clown]

pissing myself at newsnight showing the list of mps who have resigned with boris johnson's face in the background played to a dramatic rendition of bittersweet symphony like he personally murdered each and every one of them

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Matthew Perry being given the script for the Benny sex scene

[carnivore-clown]