capituloperdido1

[capituloperdido1]

ACOSAS chapter 6

Happy Thursday everyone, i want to apologize for not posting these last couple of weeks. I was off due to family matters, but i am now back and hopefully can post consistently.

Enjoy this chapter and as always let me know what you think and if you want to be tagged.

Warnings: mentions of alcohol and anxiety.

Azriel's sleep was interrupted by a insistent knock on his door, his shadows twirling around him to bring him into reality. He opened one eye, thinking about the ways he would inflict pain to whoever dared to wake him after a night where nightmares had not been present. None that he recalled anyways.

"Shadowsinger, it is passed midday, come on we need to go" The voice of the priestess comes through his window.

He opens his eyes, smiling slightly at the memory of their night together. He didn't remember a night where all his worries were thrown away just to have fun, he wanted to relieve it.

His smile fell at the thought of what they were doing today, the promise he had made her.

She had been so brave last night, going into stores, talking to people and walking by herself.

He didn't feel so brave, the simple thought of being near his mother gave him nausea. Too many memories and fears rising to his throat.

But he had to do it, if only to prove Gwyn that they could work together, that they could both get better.

"I'm coming!" He says.

He hears her laugh, and the whispers of something along the lines of sleepyhead, but he ignores it and gets ready as soon as possible.

He meets Gwyn in the entrance of the palace.

She looks more rested than normal, a certain brightness in her eyes that had not been there the day before. Her cheeks with a hint of pink and her lips darker than usual. She looked more healthy, as if she had slept for ages until her body had recovered from everything she had ever endured.  Her hair looked like silk,  tied in a low ponytail with two short pieces of hair that fell on her face. She stood taller, her Illyrian leathers framing her prohibited curves.

Azriel held his face as neutral as possible, trying and failing to stop his eyes from roaming her endlessly.

There was something about her that pulled him to be near her, something that made his hands itch at the sight of the hair on her face; begging him to tuck it behind her ear and kiss her cheeks.

He clears his throat, talking before his mind keeps taking him to impossible scenarios, "sorry i am late, someone kept me up until very early while they shopped in every store in Lux"

She smiled, her teal eyes looking at him deeply. "Shadowsinger, you invited me out last night, it is your fault we were out until late".

He returned her smile, extending his arms towards her, "you ready? we have to flight towards the border of the Night Court, it will probably take a while until we get there".

Her eyes dropped to his extended arms, a look of fear and discomfort in her face.

His heart squeezed at her reaction, "I will have to hold you through the flight, but i promise if you feel overwhelmed we can stop at any time"

She lifted her eyes and nodded slowly.

He grabs her by the waist, careful not to overwhelm her with his hands as they move to grab her tightly, "is this okay?"

She faces everywhere but his eyes, avoiding him completely as she says, "yeah... lets go".

Azriel worried that he was overstepping his limits with her, worried that she was uncomfortable with his hands touching her.

But as Azriel lifted them towards the sky, he could've sworn he saw a faint blush in Gwyns face.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

Gwyns body betrays her as she looks over the beauty of the day court, the warm feeling of Azriels hands on her waist flying down her core. When he first had extended his arms towards her, she had been nervous, afraid that a male was touching her. But once his hands had been placed around her, and she had sensed that it was not any male, but Azriel, who held her close to him; her body had overheated, and her cheeks burned at the not so innocent ideas that crossed her mind.

"we will be landing soon, close to the camps but not close enough for them to spot us" he says, pulling her from her trance.

The dark green forest of the night court welcomed her and Azriel as they flew over it, the mountains surrounding them get higher as they move deeper into the Night Court. She feels the sudden change in weather as they land in the middle of the dark forest.

Azriel begins descending, the trees slowly getting bigger as they near the earth. Azriel pulls her incredibly closer to him as they land, his warm hands pressing onto her sides to stabilize their landing. Once her feet are in the land, Azriel does not let go of her; the shadowsinger looks into her eyes for a moment, hesitant to let go.

It feels like minutes pass by, as they stare into each others eyes; as if words bubbled in their throats but their minds prevented any noises to come. She could not figure out what his eyes were meaning to tell her, but they burned with such fire that the heat she had been feeling before intensified greatly.

Something pulled them into reality, and he clears his throat before speaking, " I have never tried to teleport with other people, i want to know if you're comfortable with doing it before i try it" Azriel says,  "it is like winnowing, except in shorter distances. My shadows will transport us to where i choose, and then we can walk from there".

He moves away as if to give her space to think over her decision, but she stops him, "let's do it".

Azriel smiles as he wraps his arms around her once again, and shadows begin enveloping them into darkness. Her body suddenly feels lighter, as if she had become one with his shadows; she feels them whisper to her as they move, telling her where they are going.

One moment she was surrounded by trees the next she is in a lake at the base of a mountain.

"I am guessing your mom lives at the top of that mountain" she says.

"You guessed right" he says.

She pulls away from his warm body, convincing her mind to begin walking before she says or does something she is not supposed to. But as she begins walking uphill, she notices that the shadowsinger does not follow her, his eyes glued to the top of that mountain; no doubt regretting his decision to come here.

She smiles, extending her hand as she walks back to him, "come on Azriel, tip toe if you must, but take a step with me".

.-.-.-.-.

Azriels eyes widen at her words, remembering how yesterday they had been in the same position, only he had grabbed her hand, and he had pushed her to confront her fears.

She grabs his hand and pulls him towards her, reassuring him. He begins to walk, noticing the way her red hair flows as they move forward, ignoring the feeling of her soft skin in contact with his scared hands.

They walk in silence for hours, the only thing keeping Azriel from running away being the firm hold of Gwyns hand on his.

He looks behind him, noticing a quarter of the way already climbed, and stops suddenly.

"I need to stop" he tells her.

She turns around, letting go of his hand as they sit side by side, "you did great", Gwyn says.

He does not turn to look at her, but instead finds himself sitting with his knees to his chest as he looks towards the mountain. His back rests on a rock behind him, his leg muscles beating in pain from climbing. His mind begins to cloud itself with the thoughts of defeat, regret and embarrassment.

He feels Gwyn shifting closer to him, "what is going on through your mind?".

He sighs, "i am never going to be strong enough to see her. It has been so long, and all i have ever done is push her away. I can't look at her and avoid blaming her, and i hate myself for being so unfair; but i cannot help but wonder if she had been stronger, maybe things would've been different". He extends his hands to the light, looking at the rugged scars that mark his skin, "did you know i lost most of my feeling in my fingertips? After the accident, i was barely able to move them without feeling needles deep into my skin; as i grew up i realized my hands did not work as well as the rest of my body. So, as i began to train with the Illyrians i treated my hands as my biggest weakness, i pushed them further than anything else in my body. I trained with daggers, knifes, archer; i learned hand to hand combat better than anyone. I pushed myself so hard that no one would ever guessed that my hands are always in pain, that my bones ache after a long day; that the needles never stop poking."

He could feel Gwyns eyes on his hands, roaming and memorizing each marking on his skin; but he did not hide them, not after she had shown him her scars as well.

"You are not unfair Azriel" she says, "i cannot help to blame my sister sometimes for what happened to me. But i have to tell my mind that it was not my sister, but Hybern who attacked us, that we are the victims. You are a victim Azriel, but you mom is a victim as well. Neither of you could've done anything for each other back then, but you can now".

She extends her slender hand towards him, slowly and almost afraid that he would move away; but he does not move, knowing that he needs the soft contact of her skin to calm his mind. Her fingertips graze the top of his hand as she continues speaking softly, "Do you have any good memories of your mom?"

Azriel speaks as he leans his hands towards her touch, "For an hour once every week, i was allowed to see her. She would always cuddle me into her arms and sing the most beautiful lullabies. They were in another language, and she would spend the entire time trying to calm me down while she sang."

"Is that how you learned to sing?" Gwyn says.

He nods, looking at their interlaced fingers.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

Minutes pass in silence, and Gwyn waits for Azriel to speak again.

Her mind replays his words, the sound of pain and anger that flooded them. She had guessed that the scars would have a lasting effect on his mobility, but had never brought it up to anyone.

A soft mumble interrupts her train of thought, then a gravelly calm and rough voice takes over all the sounds around them as Azriel begins to sing.

She turns to face him, but his eyes are closed and his body is being surrounded by shadows. As he sings, they begin to envelop them like they did when they were winnowing; but this time, warmth and darkness surrounds her, as if a she had stepped into a cocoon where she would sleep until she was ready to fly.

His voice matched the beautiful darkness surrounding her, his rough voice hitting the high notes perfectly.

Tears begin to fall on her face, all in awe of Azriel.

He begins to sing softly, and the shadows retreat into his body; he ends on a soft note, his eyes still closed and his body trembling slightly.

She wipes her tears away, and extends her hands again, this time grabbing his knee; "thank you Azriel". He opens his eyes and looks at her, sadness and comfort fighting in his golden eyes. "I promise i will walk up this mountain besides you, i will stop at nothing until i see you and your mom signing together again. Because you deserve that, and deserve to be at peace once and for all".

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

Azriel flies back to the palace in silence, only talking to Gwyn to tell her that he needs extra hours of sleep and that training would be cancelled for that day.

Gwyn does not fight back, and understands that giving him space was good; that their relationship had evolved so much that she knew he would be back, and that he trusted her.

The priestess decides then, that her research on the trove and the Valkyries should also be a priority; and leads herself into the library.

She sets up her desk with the same book she had borrowed yesterday, and begins to read where she left off;

Ivor, allows only the worthy to step within its magnificence. Many have tried to conquer it, but no matter the power: ice, sun, fire, light, darkness or stars, they could never pass through the land without being killed. For hundreds of years, lords of all the courts tried to send their armies to explore the temple, only for their men to be killed or to disappear; not one of them ever came back.

It is said that Ivor was not only a training ground, but it was also the keeper of powerful artifacts of Prythian's history. The Valkyries had been around as far as to have fought besides the high king, who was rumored to have entrusted them with with valuable objects that no one knows of.

Each warrior that is pledged a Valkyrie is pledged with the responsibility to protect and die for Ivor, and what lies within.

Gwyns eyes read over the paragraph over and over again, her mind racing with millions of thoughts.

The Valkyries had been forgotten after the 500 year war, no one has ever been taught their stories. She had guessed this was a result of the embarrassment of male warriors at the thought of a female elite that surpassed them for centuries. However, it might all not have to do with the backward thinking of the High Fae; but also with magic, similar to what Nesta mentioned of the troves. Maybe Ivor, somehow, made itself nonexistent to the thought of those who knew about it, therefore erasing the Valkyries memories with it.

She grabs paper and ink, not wasting a second to inform her High Lord of her discovery;

Dear Rhys,

After long days and nights i can finally report of a potential location for the fourth trove;

I have copies of the book im reading for you to look over and remember.

My guess is that the Valkyrie temple: Ivor, hides within its walls our much needed object.

The fourth Trove is in Ivor.

Gwyn.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

The night sky accompanied Azriel in his misery. Since he had dropped Gsyn off in the library, he had made sure to hide in his chambers and think about all the was his actions in the morning had been nothing less thant atrocious.

He had grabbed onto Gwyn as a child, let his fears show and his walls crumble in front of her; he had shown her one if not the most vulnerable faces of himself.

But she had listened, and she had never once called him weak. She also hadn't tried to avoid the conversation and push him to train his anger and anxiety off; which was usually his brothers response. He had realized after hours of reflecting that his friendship with Gwyn was so strong, that there was no one or anything that would make them see each other differently.

Truth be told, it was the first time Azriel had felt a bond that close to his heart; and that scared him.

A knock comes to his door, and the raspy voice of the High Lord of the Day court speaks, "Hey Azzy, i brought whiskey"

"What kind?" Azriel responds,

"Rye Whiskey Azriel, i know your weak spots" Helion says.

Azriel opens the door, extending his hands to receive the bottle; "did you bring more than one? Im thirsty".

"I brought three bottles, but no cups because Amanecer was in the kitchen and she scares me"

The shadowsinger laughs, and seats next to his friend as they open the first bottle. He looks at the high lord, "since when are you and Amanecer so close?"

Helion takes a sip of his whiskey and smiles, "since you left me a couple of hundred years ago"

"Real funny Helion, as if i was the one who broke it off" Azriel responds.

"It was a mutual agreement, and if im being honest; you would've never wanted to leave the night court for me", he says, "Amanecer has always been a great friend, we have gotten closer as time passes by. She understands that i can never fully be hers, and that she will never be fully mine. We are friends, because we understand what is like to lose the one person you were meant to love."

Azriel sighs, "When will you move on from her Helion? its been almost two hundred years."

"I told you once before that losing her and not fighting for her was the biggest mistake of my life. I let Beron steal her away, knowing that i was... that we belonged together" Helion responds, "i realize that i will never be fully happy, which is why i broke it off with you, and why Amanecer and i work so perfectly. Because i will forever be cursed to love someone that will never belong to me, who sacrificed our love for the safety of Prythian".

Azriel stays quiet, reminiscing in Helions words, "why did you really break it off with me Helion?"

Helion laughs, "because, Azriel, you're just like me. We llive to give ourselves to a love that will never be reciprocated. Morrigan has given you hints of her lack of affection for centuries, she has gone as far as to sleep with me in order to prove it. But your heart and mind are stubborn, and do not want to move on."

"I am trying to move on" Azriel responds.

"Yeah, you're moving on to a mated female. Someone that in my opinion, should stay alone until she can fully heal. But you, you want to have her for yourself, and i have wondered for a while your reasons behind this new fixation" the high lord says, his tone expecting an answer from a shadowsinger.

Azriel gives in, his insides trembling with anger, "Elain does not belong to Lucien, he does not deserve her. I helped her when no one else could, thanks to me she was able to eat, talk and move again. No one else could've done what i did."

"So because you helped her, it suddenly means she owes herself to you" Helion attacks.

"No! But why was she mated to that piece of shit instead of me. How is it possible that both my brothers are mated to an Archeron sister, but i am not? I have waited for so long for this bond, i have prayed and looked everywhere for someone to match me".

"Because, Azriel, your brothers were lucky enough to be mated to someone they love; but it does not always happen that way"

Azriel laughs frustrated, "You would know! You are mated to Beron's wife and have done nothing for centuries to get her back! You have been weak, and too much of a coward to change that. Instead,  you have done everything to punish yourself, and mop around from lover to lover trying to a hole that won't ever be full until you have her again."

The shadowsingers eyes widen at the words that just came out of his mouth, regretting the sudden attack on his friend.

Helion lowers his eyes, grabbing a bottle and taking a long sip, "One day, Azriel, you will see that your desperate search for love has blinded you to real happiness. These last two weeks have changed you, and you and i know the answer of why there is a joyful look in your eyes. You have not noticed how much influence that priestess has on you; and when you do, i pray that it won't be too late." The high lord stands and begins walking out of the room, clearly hurt at the outcome of the conversation.

Azriel, unable to apologize for his words says, "Gwyn is my friend, nothing else".

Helion laughs sadly, opening the door and saying as he leaves "Keep denying the truth all you want, but i advise you to close those wounds with Morrigan and the Archeron sister. Cause if you don't get your shit together, she will move on. And what i wish for you the most, my friend, is that you don't become a coward like me".

TAGLIST: @imsointobooks , @gwynkyrie , @trashforazriel

[capituloperdido1]

ACOSAS Chp5

Happy Friday Everyone,

I apologize ahead for the short chapter, I've been traveling a lot the last couple of days and have not been able to write as much as i wanted. I promise to come back with 2 chapters next week.

As always, let me know if you have any feedback, or if you want to be added to the list.

Enjoy!

Warnings: sexual language, but other than that pure fluff.

Gwyn's stomach was fluttering as she walked behind the shadowsinger, Azriel's look towards her still piercing her even after five long minutes of walking. She checked herself again, her dress, her shoes, her necklace; she could not see her face but tried to touch and check if there was anything on her face.

Trying to decipher this male was more complicated than all the tasks she had done for Merrill.

The way he had just looked at her was just... lustful.

She had felt his scent changing as he took her in, combined with the intensity of his gaze.

But she still was not going to accept that it was out of attraction, there had to be another explanation. Because Azriel had too much history of tangling himself with far more beautiful women.

Elain... Mor...

She had heard bits and pieces from Nesta about the shadow's singer's love life. She knew from these short conversations that Azriel did not think himself worthy of having someone who chose him first.

She also knew that at the moment, he was pinning over the middle Archeron sister, graceful and wonderful in her own essence.

She could not blame him, from what she had seen of Elain, she was the beauty of the sisters. Her whole presence was light, class, and divinity. Even she would probably fall for Elain if she had the chance.

So there was no way he was looking at her with attraction, she probably had something on her face.

Feeling her stomach flutter even more at the idea of Azriel being attracted to her, she blurred "i read something really interesting today, about the history of Valkyries".

Azriel stopped, waiting for her to catch up to him, "i saw you reading today. I'm sorry i did not pay attention to you earlier"

"No! no please don't worry," she said, grabbing his elbow slightly, "it's not something that important anyway. I mean, the temples were probably destroyed after the Valkyries were ambushed".

"temples?" Azriel looked towards her confused.

She blushed slightly at the sight of his eyes, "right... i should start in the beginning. Basically, Valkyries were training in temples all across Prythian. They each specialized in different forms of training and powers, each court held a temple that would train females of all ages. Once their training was complete, they would be sent to a temple at the border of the Spring and Summer court. They called it Ivor, and it was said to be in a jungle-like environment that allowed only the worthy to pass through. Amanecer told me that this temple held the final test of the Valkyrie, only the women who passed through were considered full Valkyries."

She stopped, afraid she was rambling and talking incoherently.

Azriel looked amazed, "Ivor... I remember Ivor, there were rumors of soldiers who were male that were killed after setting foot there".

Gwyn's eyes opened widely, sometimes she forgot how old he was.

He continued, "it is weird i had forgotten about the temples, i remember Rhys, Cass and i would read about them. Mother.. even Rhy's sister dreamed about training in the temple of the Summer Court".

She smiled sadly, the mention of her high lord's sister squeezing her heart a bit. "So many women could've been warriors, they could've helped the last war", she looked at Azriel, "many of us could've been saved from so many tragedies if we only knew how to defend ourselves".

"There is no doubt in my mind that you would've kicked some Hybern ass out there in the battlefield. Everyone would've been scared shitless of the redhead Valkyrie running towards them", he said jokingly.

She laughed, appreciating his attempt to lighten the mood.

"In all seriousness, besides looking for the trove, we should definitely try to figure out how we can incorporate all of these Valkyrie books in our training. We have expanded in the last couple of months, but i know many more females have heard about you guys and want to train with you. That includes Amanecer" Azriel said.

She blushed, looking down to her hands,  "thank you Azriel, we will. I will make sure every female at least hears about us, and i will help them as much as i can."

The sound of fair music interrupted their conversation, Gwyn directed her view towards the street they were approaching. Stores overwhelmed the view of the road, vendors selling sweets, foods, clothing, armor and art. The smell of fresh fruits and vegetables filled her nose as she took in the sight before her.

The noise, the sight, the smell...

She was actually in a city, it was not Velaris but it was a place where normal people would go to.

She saw a few people walking, living in their own worlds as if nothing could suddenly happen that would change that.

There were only about fifteen walkings, but for Gwyn, that felt like if a pride of people was coming to surround her.

Her throat began to close, her heart racing faster by the second.

Vile rose at her throat, sweat poured through her pores.

She could not breathe, she needed to run away and get to a safe place.

She tried and failed to control her emotions, telling herself that it was fine. That all the people around her would not hurt her.

But she could not stop the panic rising in her body.

She took a step back, ashamed and humiliated.

She could not do it.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

Azriel's eyes were closed, taking in the delicious smell of spices traditional to the Day court. Out of all the things he had missed from visiting Helion, the food was at the top of his list. He remembers the night where Helion would take him walking through the city, feeding him all types of meats, rice, vegetables.

He smiled to himself, remembering when life had been a little easier.

His shadows began swirling fast around him, trying to catch his attention.

Panic, she is in panic.

Mistress is in distress.

She is leaving.

Azriel opened his eyes, turning towards the priestess.

Her brave face had turned into panicked and terrorized as she took steps to retreat from the city. Her eyes were sad, and she seemed to avoid his looks, afraid that he would judge her if she decided not to go through with this.

He extended his arms towards her, "we have two options, you can either tell me to take you back to the palace, and we will try again tomorrow. Or you can take a step forward, grab yourself on to me and look forward."

Her blue eyes shined with tears as she looked at him, hesitant to take that step.

Come on Gwyn, tiptoe if you must, but take a step towards me.

Her eyes widened, and Azriel blushed slightly at the realization that he had said that out loud.

She took one step towards him,

Two

Three

And then she grabbed his arm, looking straight in his eyes.

His shadows began to envelop themselves onto Gwyn, surrounding her arm and holding her.

She smiled again, turning her face and looking forward, "let's do this".

They take a step forward, and soon they are surrounded by the city lights.

Azriel guides her towards the small bookstore that he had visited all those years ago. The owner was an old fae who had collected books from the continent throughout the years, all genres and authors in his small stall.

Not surprisingly, Gwyn ends up almost buying the whole store. Enjoying particularly the romance section.

"This one is definitely Nesta's level of romance," she says, showing him the brown leather book with yellow pages.

"What is it about?" he says.

"A romance between an assassin and the princess" she hands him the book, "look, maybe you will finally read some good literature. Not those boring war books"

He smiles, opens the book in a random chapter, and begins reading.

I couldn’t get enough of him. I was tired and sore but I didn’t care. I didn’t want to sleep. I wanted the ache. I wanted him in me, all the time. His weight on top of me. I wanted to squeeze him in further and further. I wanted to watch his face. I wanted his sweat to drop onto me.

I got on top of him. Letting my breasts touch his face as i held him and put him in. He felt so warm in me.

I'll never forget it.

His face as i took control and he liked it. As i held his hands down and moved on top of him.

Azriel felt heat rising up his cheeks, looking shocked at Gwyn, "all you guys read is smut".

She flushed, noticing the page he now held open. Her face now of regret as she tried to take the book away from him, "that was just a coincidence. If you had opened any other page there would've been romance and adventure. This author writes really passionate romances, it just you don't know anything about romance".

He laughed, extending his arm high up so she would not be able to catch it.

Is that how she likes it? does she like to control? Words screaming in his mind.

He looked down at her neck once again, noticing the pendant moving as she jumped up trying to reach for the book. He noticed the red lips that pouted as she grew frustrated. He noticed the flushed cheeks giving away her shyness and embarrassment.

He stared at her intensely. She looked so flustered, that his mind could not help but wonder if she could be flustered in many other ways. After a kiss to her cheek, or to her mouth, or her neck. After a passionate encounter between them.

She stopped jumping, catching his strong gaze.

Her face became even redder. Which she quickly tried to hide as she looked down and began playing with her hair. Grabbing pieces of hair and tugging them behind her ear.

Azriel's temperature begins to rise at the sight of the smooth skin of her neck, the urge of grabbing it and kissing it overtaking him.

The image of Gwyn grabbing his wrist while on top of him on his mind.

Wait... What, he thinks.

Clearing his throat he extends his arm towards her and gives her the book back, "would you like to walk for a couple more minutes?"

She nods, still flushed and looking everywhere but him.

Idiot, you made her uncomfortable.

"I will take you to a couple more stores before we go, are you comfortable with that?" he asks.

"Y..yeah, it's just a bit chilly now. But i want to keep walking, if that's okay" she says, her voice soft and low.

Without thinking twice, he takes off his leather jacket, placing it around her shoulders.

Gwyn lifts her teal eyes towards him and smiles, "thank you".

They keep walking around the boardwalk, neither of them physically touching each other in fear of making a wrong move. Gwyn stops in a store that sells handicrafts traditional to the Day court. Telling him that she wants to take the chance to buy as many gifts for her friends as possible.

He waits for her outside of the store, as she insisted to go inside by herself.

Sitting on the stairs leading into the small building, Azriel traces his thoughts back to their encounter in front of the bookstore.

He had been feeling pressure in his heart, ashamed and angry at himself for making her uncomfortable.

He had lost control over his feelings, letting his mind play dirty thoughts with someone who was most likely not interested in any sexual activity.

But his mind also took him to her beautiful face, the way she seemed to shine every time she looked at him. The way the necklace highlighted the divinity of the priestess. The way her red hair looked during the day. The way her eyes changed shades during sunrise, sunset, at night.

Something in him wanted more, he wanted to see what she looked like when she slept when she awoke in the morning.

He wanted to inspect her completely, find out if she had freckles anywhere else besides her face. He wanted to taste her lips and find out if they tasted as sweet as they looked.

Sighing, Azriel grabbed his hair and looked towards the floor, frustrated and now even more angry with his selfish mind.

He was lusting after the priestess, while had unresolved issues with two females who he had also lusted over.

Elain and Mor, the two women who he could not have.

What made him think that someone like Gwyn would ever choose him?

She had to know, Nesta would've told her.

Told her how much he had hurt Elain, how Mor had done horrible things just to keep him away from her. How he had pushed his feelings onto them without thinking about the women he claimed to love.

Both Elain and Mor deserved so much better.

Gwyn deserved someone better, not him.

He could never be what they needed, his past had been clear enough.

He was destined to love but never receive love back, he was destined to hurt, destined to be alone.

"Azriel?" her sweet voice came to his ears.

Mother, he was obsessed, even hearing her while daydreaming about her.

"Azriel" sounded again.

The light and soft pressure of her hands on his arms startled him.

He looked up, finding the female looking at him with worry.

"are you alright?" she said

He quickly stood, "y...yeah I'm sorry, i was falling asleep", he lied.

She smiled, extending a paper bag towards him, "well we can head home after you open this".

A small pearl bracelet of blues and whites welcomed him once he opened the bag. White, teal, and navy blue pearls cold and smooth as he touched them.

"I know you probably won't always use it, but I wanted to give it to you, as a thank you for everything you have done for me," she said, flushing slightly.

Azriel's heart threatened to beat out of his chest, a knot forming in his throat.

No, I definitely do not deserve her. He thought.

"I will wear it, every single day," he said, putting the bracelet in his scarred hands.

She smiled, "Want me to put it on you?" extending her hands towards him.

He nods, looking at her smooth skin touching the imperfections of his hands. Looking at how the beautiful bracelet contrasted with the horrors of his skin.

"Beautiful," she said.

-.-.-.-.-.-

Neither of them said anything else as they walked back to the castle, both seemed too busy in their own minds to concern themselves with conversation.

They parted ways, promising each other to sleep only a few hours before meeting for their next challenge.

They go into their rooms, falling on their beds and closing their eyes as they hold on to that new piece of each other.

Gwyn smells the male she loves, covering herself with his jacket as she falls into a deep sleep.

Azriel touches the pearls, his mind imagining each color and what it represents. The navy blue of his siphons, which had and will dust anyone who might hurt her. White of her robes, the purity, and innocence of her heart. Teal of her beautiful eyes, that always looked at him so hopeful, so happy, so proud.

Even though the nightmares came, even though they were even more horrible than the ones before.

Neither of them noticed.

Whether by their exhaustion or by what they held so tightly, the couple awoke unaware of the terrors their mind just had endured.

Their only thought was each other.

TAGLIST: @imsointobooks @gwynkyrie @trashforazriel @meher-sumedha

Chapter 6

[capituloperdido1]

Hope You're OK (Emerie & Mor Modern)

As promised, an angsty one shot with a happy ending with my favorite women.

Enjoy!

The sound of her iPhone alarm pulled her into reality, the loud noise of Black Pink's latest hit drumming in her ears. Emerie extended her arm to turn off her phone, immediately turning to embrace the blonde right next to her.

Except her girlfriend was not next to her.

Startled, she pulled herself up from the bed, walking towards the bathroom looking for Mor.

-Babe!- she calls out.

Nothing.

Maybe she is in the kitchen, she thinks.

Walking downstairs, the female calls out for her girlfriend a couple more times.

No one answers back.

Pressure builds in her chest as Emerie runs upstairs to grab her phone, looking for the contact number for Mor to immediately contact her.

Except the line cuts off at the first ring.

She tries again.

This time it doesn't ring, it immediately cuts off.

Looking at her phone, Emeries eyes begin to cloud with tears as her thoughts drive her everywhere. What if something happened to her? what if she is hurt?

No.

After their fight a couple of days ago Emerie knows why Mor has left.

She left to avoid hurting Emerie more. She left because she is not ready to tell everyone the truth.

She drops her phone across the room, grabbing her face as she begins crying uncontrollably. Mor would never leave without waking her for a kiss, or texting her where she went. She always made sure Emerie knew where she was, not because she was possessive, but because Emerie's anxiety took her mind.

It had to be that, there was no other answer.

She kneeled on their bed, closing her eyes and trying as hard as possible to deny this reality.

Eventually, her mind took her to another time, where Mor and Emerie had been happy.

Nesta and Feyre had invited everyone to Rita's for a night of fun after their final exams. Emerie had been hesitant to go with them, preferring to spend her night reading and watching the newest episode of The Mandalorian instead of watching preppy white men drunk and throwing themselves at her. But Nesta had convinced her that it would be fun, that she would not be left alone at any time of the night.

She had also told her that Morrigan would most likely be there.

That had convinced her.

Emerie had only told her best friends, Nesta and Gwyn, her feelings towards the stunning blonde. It had been hard to come to terms with how she felt, but her friends had supported her and she was now completely open with who she decided to love.

However, coming to terms with your sexuality never meant that you magically learned how to flirt.

Completely the opposite.

She could not even look at Mor in the eyes without feeling the fire in her cheeks and butterflies in her stomach.

So as Emerie got ready, she decided that today she was getting over herself. She would at least talk to Mor and buy her a drink.

She had dressed in the black silk dress that left her back to the eyes of everyone, leaving her curly hair down and wearing silver jewelry. She had tried to look and feel sexy, confident.

That was the initial plan, she was now at Rita's bar, with a cocktail at hand, looking at the woman of her dreams being drowned of attention by all men in the building.

She took a long sip of her drink.

-This was a waste of time- she said.

Nesta, who had actually been beside her at all times, looked at Emerie amused. -You know, things might be different if you actually talked to her-.

Emerie took another sip. -I was going to... but she is surrounded by... them- she pointed out.

-Well, if you approach her then maybe she would pay attention to you. She seems to be ignoring everyone- Nesta said.

Nesta was not wrong, most of the men that surrounded her were being ignored;  Mor was looking at the dancing floor, drinking her champagne cup and enjoying her own presence more than all others.

However, Emerie could not stop feeling insecure. She did not even know if Mor could reciprocate her feelings, she was only guessing that she would.

As if Mor had guessed her thoughts, the blonde looked over towards the bar, meeting her eyes with Emerie's. Mor smiled softly, lifting her cup and taking a sip.

Emerie felt heat all over her face and took another long sip of her cocktail.

-Maybe i'll give it a try- She said, standing. -It is time i make a move- She looked at Nesta, waiting for some words of encouragement.

-You got this, you're the best-looking person in this bar -she said, -i'll beat her up if she rejects you-.

Emerie laughed and began walking towards the beautiful female with the short red dress.

Mor was still looking at her, her entire body had shifted towards Emerie; as if now she had the blonde's entire attention.

Emerie walked towards her, hoping she would not ruin the moment by saying something weird.

But as if a bucket of water was thrown at her, Emerie stopped in her tracks as a man with long red hair came up towards Mor and grabbed her hand. The man blocked Emerie from Mor's view, and Emerie saw as the guy sat in front of Mor, touching her legs and arms.

Mor did not seem to mind, smiling and laughing at whatever the man was saying.

Fuck it, Emerie thought.

Pissed at Mor, she went back to the bar and grabbed her purse. - I'm leaving- she said to Nesta, and without waiting for a response ran towards the exit of the bar.

How could Emerie be so clueless, Mor would never even glance at her. She did not even know her, Emerie had conversations with Mor; but they usually consisted of the blonde speaking while Emerie was quietly looking at her beautiful face.

She walked outside of the bar, running towards the nearest subway station.

Stupid, you need to move on from this stupid crush.

Rain began pouring down as Emerie walked as if the world wanted to make her night even worst.

The sound of heels interrupted her thoughts, ragged sounds of breath became clearer behind her.

-Emerie- Mor's sweet voice came up behind her, -Why are you leaving?-

Emerie turned, her heart squeezing at the sight of Mor's sad eyes and drenched body. She was worried about her, she had run all the way here for her.

But it meant nothing.

-I did not want to interrupt your fun- she said, bitter and mad

Mor's eyes widened, her mouth gaping at her, -what did you just say?-.

Emerie looked at Mor's eyes, anger taking over her words as they came out. -I said, i did not want to ruin your fun with the man that was just near you. That i left because i could not watch you being suffocated with men while you are sitting as if nothing happens. Were you even interested in me talking to you? or was that just you being nice?-

She paused, waiting for Mor to answer.

When she didn't, Emerie continued. -I have tried all fucking night to build the courage to talk to you, but how can i? You would not even see me with the sea of men near you. For cauldron's sake, i tried to come up with a compliment of your dress, how beautiful you look... But what can i say that other men haven't yet? How can make you understand that what you make me feel if i don't get the chance to-.

Emerie paused, walking towards Mor.

-I like you Mor, not in a friendly way... In a way that you are all i think about, all i want and desire. You make me feel things i have never felt before. You make me shy, happy, sad and angry all while talking to you. I am stupid when i am around you, i act as a child who does not know how to talk. You hypnotize me, the most stunning and gorgeous female in this entire fucking country. All i want is to worship you, get to know you, make you laugh and cry of happiness. But i cannot! I can't because you would never pay attention to someone like me... Right?-

Mor's eyes looked deeply into Emeries, the blonde's facial expression neutral as the words settled between each other.

A minute passed

two,

three.

Emerie smiled sadly, turned around and began walking towards the station.

She would give up, she had finally told her what she felt. Mor owed her nothing.

She was only able to take one step when the female grabbed her wrist and twisted Emeries body towards hers. Her slender long arms tightening around her, Mor's face falling on her neck as she sobbed. -Thank you, thank you- the female said.

Emerie returned the hug, uncertain of what those words meant.

Mor lifted her face, moving her hands to grab Emerie's face. -I only want you, i am sorry i was acting as if i didn't. I have not dealt with my feelings, but i will. I will deal with everything just for a chance to love you-

Mor's face got close to hers, their noses grazing with one another. Without a second to respond, Mor's lips crashed onto hers. The softness of her mouth overwhelming as they moved closer together and deepened the kiss.

They both cried as they felt the closeness of one another, as they felt the happiness of being in each other's embrace.

Mor's lips left hers as she said, -take me to your house if you are leaving i am leaving with you-.

Emerie was now breathed in the scent of Mor's sweaters, still crying and heartbroken at the thought that she had been dumped by the love of her life.

It had been three hours since she awoke, she had tried to call her again.

Mor had ghosted her. Left her without saying goodbye.

She stood from the bed, trying to move her body into any action that would help her stop thinking about what was happening.

The bell sounded,

her body begins moving towards the door, praying for Mor to be there.

She runs down the stairs, busting her ass almost at the end for how fast she was moving.

Emerie arrives at the door and opens it without asking who is it.

Blonde messy hair and bloodshot eyes welcome her, her girlfriend's face is swollen and sad as she looks at her.

She has been crying.

Emerie tries to speak, tries to say anything.

Mor beats her to it, -I came out to my parents- she says, showing her some plastic bags that seemed to be full with clothes, -they kicked me out-.

Emerie walks towards her, grabbing some of the bags. Mor does not let her, she drops all the bags to the floor and jumps towards Emerie, embracing her. -I'm sorry i left without a word, i wanted to surprise you. I am done hiding. I don't need or want anyone besides me but you. You are my happiness Emerie, my future. I don't care who i lose, you are who i love and no one or anything will change that-

As they embrace each other, she lets Mor cry for the loss of her family.

She will apologize for not trusting her later. Now she will do anything for her girlfriend

to be okay. She hugged Mor even tighter.

Minutes pass, Mor begins to calm in Emeries' arms. Her girlfriend looks at her and smiles sadly, -can i move in with you?-.

[capituloperdido1]

ACOSAS

Chapter 4

Happy Wednesday everyone! i apologize for the following chapter, it might be a little slow because i am trying to move some of the plot forward.

I will make it up to you guys with a Mor and Emerie one-shot that will come up later today or early tomorrow! Let me know if you want to be tagged in that.

As always, enjoy and let me know if you want to be tagged!

Warnings: Mentions of violence, anxiety attacks.

Gwyn had awoken at sunrise; she had dreamt of her sister again, the last two weeks had been a repetition of the dream. After the night she had accidentally made a bargain with Azriel, she had begun to cope with the weight of the dream much better.

She put on her Valkyrie leathers on, ignoring the need in her chest to knock at Azriel's door. The shadowsinger had been practically sleeping at her door each night, waiting for her to scream, talk or run out of the door startled.

Today was different, she had awoken conscious that what she had seen in her dream was not reality. She had decided once her eyes were open that she would not bother Azriel, even if his company helped ease the terror in her guts as she thought of the voice of her sister pleading and screaming.

Today, she had decided to go run at the beach.

Gwyn had grown accustomed to roam in the palace by herself, and even leave without anyone to the coliseum and the gardens. The palace at the top of the Lux city seemed to have no one around at any time; that made her feel comfortable, and safe.

Walking down the sidewalk towards the beach, Gwyn admires the view of the dawn's sky in the reflection of the salt-water. There was such beauty on the Day Court, the waters were clearer, the grass and trees fertile and strong, the animals seemed to have brighter colors in their skins. She did not remember much of her time in Sangravah, but she knew that unlike the Night and the Day court, the temple had lacked brightness and color. Or maybe that was just how her mind remembered, she didn't know.

The beach of Lux was as white as every wall in every corner of the city, the sand was soft, the seashells were pink and purple. She wondered how other courts did not become envious at the sight of such magnificent landscapes. Rhysand had the biggest court and Tarquin the best weather, but there was no doubt that Helion had built the court to be the best at everything else.

As she began stretching for her run, she heard the roaring sound of steps behind her. A spark lit up in her chest, hoping for a certain winged-male to come up behind her.

-I see the shadowsinger finally left your side- Amanecer said.

Disappointed, but happy to have some company, she looked at the female with bright eyes, - i think its the other way around, i finally left his side-

Amanecer took seat besides her, her training clothes were the color aesthetic of the court; white, gold and beige combined in her leathers. Her long locks were tied with a black band in the back of her head. -Do you mind if i train with you?- she said.

-Not at all, i am used to having someone around anyways-.

As they stretched, Gwyn began practicing some breathing exercises for long-distance training. Valkyries had developed different breathing patterns for different types of training; each one of them to control your mind and muscles to sustain whatever work they would be put under.

-When Helion mentioned you were training as a Valkyrie i did not believe him- Amanecer said, -It has been centuries since someone recognized them as warriors. After they were massacred, it was as if everyone forgot about them. I thought no one had any records of them, i see i was wrong-.

-Did you know them?- Gwyn asked.

Amanecer smiled, -my girlfriend was a Valkyrie, her name was Fortis, she was also from Lux; she worked in the court with Helion and my mother. I was able to train with the Valkyries, i studied with them and almost became one. -

-Why didn't you?-

-I tried, but i was not able to pass the final test- Amanecer responded.

Gwyn frowned, -I have not heard of a final test in the Valkyrie records i have-.

-That's because this court has most of the records, Helion was able to save their scrolls after they were massacred. We have them in a special part of this library-.

Gwyn felt her eyes open wide and her mouth gaping, -Can i see them?! I have been searching for more stories about them! I want to be able to honor them in our training back home-.

Amanecer's eyes found hers, her smile spreading as she heard Gwyn -I will take you there after we take our run- She said as she stood, - i will also teach you how to continue to focus on your breathing as you exercise, that will help your organs get stronger. It will help you channel the strength of your movements-. Amanecer began running as she finished her sentence, not looking back.

Gwyn followed her, writing down all the questions she would ask the female later in the morning in her mind.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

-Look at this bastard- someone said. -He believes he has the right to see the light, he should be kept here all day. No one should be able to see him, it would shame our family-.

Male laughter startled him a he opened his eyes.

He was ready to dream about it today, he always was ready.

But as his eyes opened in the dream he did not see himself kneeling in the ground looking up at his brothers; he was standing, looking down at a frail boy with long-curly hair and small broken wings.

The boy looked up, his honey-golden eyes and sharp features revealing the face of his brother.

Cassian was looking up to him, blood on his nose, his hands extended towards Azriel as voices besides him laughed.

Azriel heard a bump, and another body was placed besides Cassian. Long, dirty blonde hair and small female body keeled in front of him.

Mor.

Her brown eyes showed despair, they looked at him pleading. She trembled as she saw him.

Both kids looked at him with fear; their bodies bruised and bloody, their hands extended.

He realized as he moved his hands towards them that he was not in control of his own body. That these were not his actions.

In his right hand he had a lit up torch, in his left he had oil.

One male grabbed Cassians hand's, pullling towards Azriel.

Unable to do or say anything, he dropped oil on top Cassians hands, he neared the torch to his tiny hands...

As Cassian screamed in pain, Azriel tried and failed to stop, move away from his brother.

But he couldn't.

It wasn't long until he did the same to Mor, watching her fall into her knees as the pain of being burnt consumed her.

In his mind, he screamed and tried with all his might to move away from them, to stop inflicting pain.

But as Azriel saw Cassian's and Mor's hands being burnt to open flesh, he realized that he was in the body of one of his brothers. He was finally the monster he always thought himself to be.

Shooting upright Azriel lifted himself from the bed, startled and with tears in his eyes. He moved towards the bathroom, looking for cold water that would confirm this was real.

He remember how vivid and real that dream had been, the smell of the room, the feeling of the torch and the oil in his skin. As if the dream had been a reality.

But looking down to his hands he confirmed that it had been just that. A dream.

As he prepared himself a bath, he began recalling every instance of the dream. It had not been normal, the realistic feel, the fact that he was seeing Cassian and Mor so clearly.

He had met Mor as a teen, never as a child.

Something was wrong.

He had begun to suspected when Gwyn told him that the nightmares with her sister had continued, that they got more and more realistic as each night passed. As if with each passing night, the dreams became more the reality; and one day, neither of them would be able to awake from his nightmares.

Azriel had never dreamt of being the one inflicting pain. Whenever he dreamt about his brothers or his mom being burnt, he was on the sidelines doing nothing. He was never torturing.

Something was wrong, and he would find out. Before the nightmares would make him and Gwyn never sleep again.

-.-.-.-.-.-.

Valkyries lived all across Prythian, they had a temple in every court, and all high lords had been forced to recognized them as warriors. According to the books Amanecer had lent her, Valkyries had been around for millennia; they had fought besides the High King, had endured the first wars and some of them had made it to some of the wars of the last five centuries.

To the world, they had been eradicated after a surprise attack in the war of five hundred years. Some of them had survived the war, going into exile from all societies. A few of the high lords of the time, Autumn, Dawn, Spring, and Night had trashed or burnt every record of their existence. Others, like the Summer and Day court, had taken the scrolls and weapons from certain temples in their courts into safe-houses.

There were theories that the attack had been an inside job from some courts that wanted to stop the females from gaining popularity among women in patriarchal societies.

In the night court, according to the law of 300 years ago, spreading the story of the Valkyries was prohibited and would be punished by death.

Some high lords had fought side by side with the warriors; Helion had been one of them. One of the scrolls revealed that the High Lord had mandated that all young women would have training in at least one form of Valkyrie fighting style. He had even made a female unit just for his safety.

As she read, she realized that all of Prythian had done an excellent job of forgetting the power and influence of the female warriors. Amanecer had explained that everything they owned concerning the Valkyries had to be protected because of certain groups that wanted to erase them from history.

The book she currently read revealed several locations around the country where temples had existed. Each Valkyrie temple specialized in one form of fighting, they trained for different weather conditions, enemies and defense strategies according to where the temple was located.

A symbol marked with silver ink marked the temple Gwyn guessed was the principle one, across borders of the Spring and Summer court:

The temple of Ivor is in a forest thick with trees, slippery leaves, and rough vines; with a hot and humid temperature. The combined scent of vegetation, moisture, soil, and decaying plants and wood will be overbearing as you walk towards it. The location of Ivor had been decided in order to maintain people away from it.

Ivor is a place were only few warriors live at, but all warriors must survive.

There is a creature, deep in this forest that will test your bravery and will. Not many are able to survive it.

Only the worthy will pass to Ivor, only the worthy will become Valkyrie.

Heavy and slow footsteps pulled her out of her reading trance, as she lifted her head, she was welcomed with the sight of a winged male with a face looking towards the floor and hair covering his honey eyes.

-What's wrong?- she asked him

He took a moment to respond, walking closer to her and closing some distance between them. -I had a bad night- he said quietly.

She stood, bringing a chair to her current space of work and tapping it so he would sit next to her. -Do you want to talk about it?-

-No.- He said, quiet and harsh.

-Hmm.... would you like to go relieve some stress?- she said, trying to lighten his mood.

-If you don't mind, i would like to go train right now. Maybe that would help- he answered.

She smiled slightly, and nodded. -Go Azriel, i am sure i can be by myself a little longer.-

Without saying anything else, Azriel turned his back to her and walked out of the library and left.

Gwyn tried to go back to reading, tried to involve herself into the story as much as she could. But she was failing to read more than one sentence without thinking back to Azriel and his sad eyes.

She was worried about him.

He took everything that happened to him too hard.

He thought of himself so low.

Sometimes, she worried that he would not be able to move on. That he was not going to ever be happy.

She stood, putting the books in a pile she would likely not come back to until the next day.

She walks toward the door with one goal in mind: she is going to make Azriel smile, no matter what.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

The rock weights are heavy against Azriels sweaty shoulders, he squats low for the fiftieth time, trying to feel the pain as he releases all his emotions through the exercise.

He has been training for two hours, running, lifting, jumping and swimming. Doing everything in his power to stop thinking, stop picturing the nightmare in his mind.

He has not been able to.

-Oi! you're going to break your back if you lift more rocks man- Helion says.

He looks towards the high lord, dressed in his typical white robes and golden accessories. He carries a small envelope, he is coming towards him.

-I have good news my friend- he says, extending the paper towards him.

Azriel grabs the paper, and opens it without responding to Helion.

-It's an invitation to the next big event of Prythian, Cassian and Nesta are finally doing it. - Helion says,

Azriel had guessed that neither Cassian nor Nesta were going to come and give the invitation personally. They were probably too busy to stop by and check on them. Besides, the ceremony would be in less than a month; they were seeing them soon.

Azriel was glad that Cassian was not here, if he saw his brother he would probably fall down to his knees and beg him to forgive him. Forgive him for something he had not yet done.

-Thank you, Helion- Azriel said, going back to his training.

-What's got your wings on a twist now? - Helion asked

He rolled his eyes in response, -nothing, stop being such a busy body-

Helion smiled, getting dangerously close to him, -you use to like it when i was a busy body-.

Azriel couldn't help but to look at him amused, -stop flirting, you can't handle me- he dropped the weights and walked towards the water station. -Actually, i do have a question.... Have you had any unusual dreams, as of late? Anything that seems too real, to be true?-

The male looked at him surprised, -well... yeah. The last few weeks I've had terrible nightmares, I've barely been able to sleep-

-When did they start exactly-

-Well... when Rhys informed me that you guys were coming. At first they were just glimpses during my afternoon nap, but lately is every time i sleep. I feel like i am inside of the dream, actually living it. But, i wonder, why are you asking me?-

Azriel served the High Lord a cup of water, pouring one for himself, - Gwyn and i have been having them as well. She has been dreaming about the same thing nonstop. getting progressively worse. In my case, well, i had a nightmare that was out of the ordinary yesterday-.

-So what's the hunch?- Helion said.

-They are not normal, i think someone.... or something is causing them. And i think it has to do with the trove, the fact that we are looking for it. I think we should be careful, if there something that we should've learned by now is that magic is not subjective to what we know. There is so much that exists, so much we don't know about it. And we also have so much enemies, that we should not be surprised if they are doing something to us for trying to get somewhere we should not.-

Helion nodded, - alright, tell me what to do. I will help in any way i can, you're the spy after all-.

-.-.-.-.-.-

Azriel was stretching when Gwyn arrived.

She had guessed that he needed time by himself, but she was not giving up on talking to him yet.

-It seems as if an earthquake passed through this training field- she said, walking towards him.

He smiles as he looks up towards her, -I had to try out the equipment, before you go ahead and break it-.

Her heart flutters as he sees the half smile he throws her way, she had come all this way to make him smile and she had done it in less than two minutes. -I do not break the equipment, it is simply bad quality and using ti properly destroys it. The Night court is just too cheap to buy it-.

He stood, walking towards her as he used a towel to wipe the sweat off his brow. -I will tell your High Lord and Lady that you just called him cheap-

-You would not dare!- she said.

-Try me.-

She dropped her gaze slightly, feeling the heat rising to her cheeks at his proximity. -Are you... feeling better?- she asks, trying to ignore the filthy thoughts in her mind at the sight of the beautiful sweaty male in front of her.

His smile falters, -a little... I needed to sweat it out.-

-What happened? You were really affected by it- she says.

He stays quiet, looking deeply at her.

A minute passes, he does not answer. Instead, he exhales and says -we are working on our bargain today, there is something i want to show you-.

He does not want you to know, she realizes.

She drops the subject and smiles, -where? are we going today?-

-We are going to a board walk around the city, later tonight. It has some shops open, but it won't be crowded- he explains. -then tomorrow we can try to practice going near my mom. If you are comfortable flying towards the Night Court with me-.

-You know i wont back down, sounds like a deal shadowsinger- she said, leaving him to start getting ready for the night.

She wished she had Nesta besides her to get ready.

Nesta could've told her how in the mother she was to put on the dress she had in front of her.

The deep green gown decorated with white flowers had been a gift from her friend, who had encouraged to wear something other than her training clothes and her priestess robe. The dress was long, and it seem to be loose fitted with a somewhat tight bodice. The trick was to tight it in the back, the straps of the dress were supposed to form a corset like back that would be tight according to the body of the person using it.

She was nervous, freaking out even.

She could not believe she was finally going to a city, walking around with people besides her.

Two months ago this would have not happened, she would've never left the library. But now here she was, getting ready to hang out with the man she loved while also wearing normal clothes.

Gwyn looked at herself in the mirror, looking at the dress falling down to her knees, the long crimson hair that she had brushed so it would fall straight around her face. She looked different, powerful, pretty, happy.

Something is missing, she thought as she went towards her jewelry box.

She had not worn the pendant since it had arrived in her room all those months ago in solstice, it was the first gift she had received in the two years she had been in the library.

It was her most priced possession.

As she placed the flower pendant in her neck, she dreamt of finding whoever had given it to her. She had asked Nesta and Emerie about, both looking confused when she mentioned how it had arrived to her rooms.

The necklace was beautiful, the golden flower had a small amethyst stone as the center of the pendant making it delicate and elegant.

She looked at herself again, and smiled.

She gathered her courage and left the rooms, hoping this night would also bring her courage to get closer to the man waiting for her at the entrance of the palace.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

The sky in Lux was rather overwhelming, during the day it was bright and it shined excessively. At night, the stars seemed like another sun came into view, many parts of the city did not need to use oil lamps to light up their streets, the stars bright enough.

Azriel hated seeing something so bright when he was trying to be as broody as possible.

Even with all the hours at the training field, he had not been able to forget or evade the pain in his chest as he thought of the dream that haunted him.

He was such a hypocrite, two weeks ago he followed Gwyn everywhere to make sure she would not suffer from her nightmares. But here he was, burying himself in his feelings and ignoring anyone who wanted to help him.

He knew Helion and Gwyn would not judge him by his dream, but he was too embarrassed and angry at himself to tell anyone what he had seen.

He should be smarter, knowing it was just that... a dream.

But it had felt so real.

He had actually wanted to send a letter to Cassian to ask if he was okay.

Mor... he would evade Mor for a little while more. When he saw her again he would probably not talk about his dream, but they would finally have that talk he had needed for so long.

Azriel ran his fingers through his hair, pulling some strands to make himself distract that feeling in his chest that had been messing with him since the morning.

He would start investigating, the dreams were not normal. There was something wrong and he would find out what, before he could see anyone else being hurt by his hands in his dreams.

He exhaled, letting his mind travel to the flashback of the dream. Drowning himself in the pain of being alive.

The doors at the palace entrance opened, and a gust of wind settling him into reality.

Light, fast step sounded nearer as he lifted his head.

-I am so sorry I'm late, i could not find this damn exit anywhere- Gwyn said.

His eyes widened as he took her in.

His shadows darken and begged him to fly towards her, embrace her.

She had change out of her training outfit into a beautiful green dress, her hair down and flowing as she ran towards him.

But what caught his attention was not the dress, or the shoes.

The priestess wore the pendant he had given her in solstice. The golden chain jumping up and down in her neck as she neared him.

He thought he heard Gwyn say something as she stopped in front of him. But he was not listening, focusing his stare in the neck of the woman in front of him.

Something in his chest fluttered, happiness rising in him for the first time in the day.

His stupid male pride growing, Gwyn was wearing something of his around her neck.

A declaration his mind was not ready to understand but his heart pushed forward.

He finally moved his eyes to see her, chocked with how only three weeks of being in a new court has made Gwyn shine so brightly.

She seems happier, stronger, and even more beautiful.

He feels a smile appearing in his face, broad and full as he takes her deep blue eyes looking at him.

She is so brave.

She catches him smiling, and her eyes shine even brighter. A smile of plump lips and white teeth forming on her angelic face.

Right there, makes a promise to himself to try harder, to follow her example.

To do anything to bring her to smile like that again and again until it sticks forever.

TAGLIST: @imsointobooks , @gwynkyrie , @trashforazriel

[capituloperdido1]

ACOSAS

Chapter 3

Enjoy this chapter everyone!

Warnings: Mentions of SA and trauma

Azriel had felt it.

His shadows, already used to the nightmares, screamed in his mind.

This was not an ordinary dream, the usual fire and laughter from his brothers did not bother him. There was something else.

Someone was screaming,

No... Not someone, a woman.

The voice grew more desperate, more pained with each passing second.

Don't go

You'll die

You deserve to be alive, not me

Azriel's mind wondered why the woman as screaming the way she did, who was causing that pain.

In response his shadows whispered, Gwyn.

Gwyn...

Azriel's eyes shot open the moment he realized it, his feet took to the floor as his mind rushed to find the priestess. Something was wrong, he felt it to his very core.

He should not have let her by herself.

Opening the door, Azriel was welcomed by the desperate sounds of a sobbing Gwyn. She seemed lost, confused and sad; she didn't know where she was he realized.

He walked over towards her.

She flinched.

A tug on his heart made him talk, -Gwyn...Gwyn it's me-.

A minute passed as her eyes became more clear; she was still crying, but she looked more grounded.

Relief settled in Azriel's chest, he had arrived on time.

His fingers itched with the urge of hugging her, comforting her. But he settled by sitting in the marble floor in front of her, waiting for her to say something.

Out of all the nights he had seen her after her nightmares, this time it was different. Something had changed in her dreams, this had deeply affected her. He could only guess how far the dream had taken her.

-I....i dreamt of her. My sister. - She whispered as she sat. - It's the first time i saw her since the attack, and i dreamt of the moment she was killed by Hybern-.

-Do you want to tell me what you saw?-he said.

She nodded, -It was a different dream, i usually revive what happened to me before you arrived. But this time, it was me, right now, with the knowledge she was going to die. But i could do nothing, i said nothing as she jumped to danger; as she was raped and tortured by those men-

A moment passed, Gwyn's sobs calmed only a little. -It was as if my mind got tired of hiding my feelings, my true feelings-

-What are those feelings?- Azriel said.

-That i killed my sister, that out of the two of us she deserved to live more than me. That she would be a better priestess, a better warrior, a better woman. She would not have hesitated to train with Nesta as much as i did, she would have already seen Velaris. I am a coward in comparison of her- Gwyns eyes were clouded with sadness as she spoke. And Azriel could say nothing, how could he respond to something he felt himself.

What kind of comfort could he give her? His thoughts were similar to hers, he had wanted to die instead of so many others.

-I wanted to do better, to keep improving after the Blood Rite- Gwyn continued, -but i decided that i was too comfortable to do so. I decided to stay in the library because it was comfortable. It wasn't until someone else offered me a excuse to get out that i took the chance. I feel like a failure.-

-You are not a failure- Azriel interrupted her as he stood, -Let me show you how powerful you are. -He extended his arm to help her lift up, -I was planning to surprise you tomorrow, but i think we need it more right now-

She took his hand, and Azriel tried hard not to think about it as he lifted her. But the ragged and scarred kin of his hands felt dirty when the soft and cold skin of the priestess pressed against him.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

Gwyn followed behind Azriel as he took her outside of the castle, the shadowsinger only telling her to change into her training outfit.

-The day court is specialized in many things, they are best at math, science, magic and even fashion- Azriel started, -but one thing that not many people know about is that they are fantastic warriors. So much so, that many of the Valkyrae women came from this court. -

As they left the castle, Gwyn was welcomed with the dawn sunshine shinning bright on top of the beautiful green fields. As she took in the view, Gwyn realized that they were walking along a sand path towards a coliseum; tall and made out of marble and gold, the building extended itself as part of the castle, Gwyn was sure that it was bigger than the House of Wind in the mountain she lived in.

-This will be our new training field, for the next few weeks we will both train as Day Court warriors- He said, -Inside, there is a training course much different from the ones you have completed. There are three stations, one for speed, one for endurance and one for strength. A land course that will have obstacles as your run along, a water course where you will have to collect certain objects, an air course where you will jump from one side to the other using the strength of your arms.-

Azriel's description of the training field seemed easy in comparison to reality, the massive structure of the coliseum provided enough space for a pool, a track course and some obstacles. Gwyn was both impressed and threatened by the massive challenge that this new training provided.

-How is this going to prove I'm powerful- she said, half joking.

Azriel smiled slightly, - because we are not starting here today. We are going to fight there- Azriel pointed to a space in the gigantic pool where  a huge mat was floating. - Your training will begin with a simple one on one battle, later we can try on the training course- He threw her a long-sword blade as he talked, she grabbed it with ease, -let's go-.

That's how she had ended up on top of a wet mat, soaked from head to toe from all the times Azriel had dropped her to the water.

Panting, she looked at Azriel - I think this is not what you had in mind.-

-Stop holding back, you're holding back your strength, you are too scare to fall- he said, looking serious and somewhat angry -show me your true strength, show me what you have learned.-

She looked at the sword, her heart feeling squeezed as she settled Azriel's words in her heart. She had been holding back, not only from fighting, but also from living her life.

As she lifted the sword, she focused on her breathing; closing her eyes she remember the lessons from the books she had read about Valkyrae's.

The connection of mind and body made Valkyraes more agile and powerful than the average warrior; they used their senses to detect how their opponents would attack. Their breathing allowed them to jump, run and hit harder than everyone else; they were able to outrun many wild animals.

She began to settle her breathing.

-I am the rock against which the surf crashes. Nothing can break me.- she said softly, -nothing can break me- she said louder.

Azriel smiled satisfied.

Gwyn smiled too, and she jumped towards him with the sword pointed at him. He blocked her first attack, hitting her back with the end of his sword and almost pushing her against the end of the mat. She flipped backwards, grabbing the back of his neck as she dropped to the floor. When she landed, she had placed enough force against him that he had fallen on his face. As tried to lift himself by flying, she focused her entire strength in her legs that the next jump destabilized the mat. The force that her legs had created echoed in the water, creating waves that made the mat go sideways; taking Azriel down with them.

She tried and failed to land on a stable side of the mat, falling right besides him.

She smiled triumphantly, feeling the waves she had created.

As the water settled, both of them swam to the end of the pool. She lifted herself of the pool, shivering out of excitement and cold. -Did you see that? i had never done that with my body!- She exclaimed.

Azriel smiled, - i was not able to see it, but i sure as hell felt that-.

She laughed, taking her hair and squeezing the water out of it.

Azriel looked deeply at her, looking from her hair to her face.

Gwyn began blushing, -thank you, for bringing me here-.

-How are you feeling?- Azriel asked.

Looking into his honey eyes, she was surprised to find that the thoughts that had tormented her since her nightmare were not present in her mind anymore.

-Powerful- She answered.

His eyes traveled in every direction across her face, shadows darkening as the seconds ticked by. One of his shadows traveled towards her, she smiled and opened her hand welcoming it.

A sound similar to a gasp escaped Azriel.

She looked up abruptly, -s..sorry, am i not supposed to touch them?-

-No... i mean yes you can, it's just... you surprised me... That's all- He answered.

Gwyn always liked feeling of the shadows tangling themselves with her fingers, she felt comforted; and she loved that they belonged to him.

Azriel stood, -we should head back, we have a long day ahead and i can imagine you're hungry- he started walking towards the exit.

-Azriel- she called out

He stopped

-Thank you, for believing in me- she said.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

After breakfast, Helion had directly guided them to library. Gwyn currently stood with her mouth in the floor looking at the building that Helion called the center of knowledge of the Day Court. The glass windows illuminated the marble shelves, that as every single part of Helion's court was decorated with gold. The library seemed infinite, and unlike the one in Velaris, the end of the building was the sky not the center of the earth. She could not imagine one person walking up the library in one day. Thousands and thousands of books in all languages, colors and shapes surrounded her.

The library was straight out of a fairy tale.

Helion approached her with a smile in his face, -I heard from Rhys that you're a fan of books. I have something really amazing to show you.- He walked over a table in the middle, the table made out of glass had different genres of books written on it. -We have too many books to be handle by only humans, so we have enchanted the library so that it gives us the books we need. Just say the genre and topic you're looking for-.

She smiled, -history, Valkyraes-

A dozen of books began floating down the immense tower, falling on top of the center table.

-Just name what you need, the library will help you- Helion said. - We also have some staff that can help you guys find anything, including my personal adviser and friend, Amanecer-.

A tall slender female walked over towards her, her body adorned by gold chains and bracelets that decorated her beautiful dark skin. She wore the same white robes as Helion, but hers were tied in the middle by a golden belt decorated with flowers.  She had long black locks of hair falling around her, reddish brown highlights illuminating the sides of the  face of the woman. Her eyelashes were full and long, and her eyes were the color of gold.

She was simply the most beautiful woman Gwyn had ever seen.

-It is a pleasure to meet you Gwyneth- the woman said, and her voice just as enchanting as her physique. -I will assist you in anything you need, please do not hesitate to contact me at any time-.

-Thank you, Amanecer- Gwyn said.

Ignoring the shadowsinger's presence completely, Amanecer extended a hand towards Gwyn's; - let me show you around-.

When Helion and Amanecer left, Gwyn walked back towards the center table. Amanecer had showed her the entire first and second floor; they had talked about their favorite tropes, their favorite authors and genres. She was satisfied and impressed that there was someone as similar to her as Amanecer.

Azriel looked at her with a smirk in his face, -So, you're ready to begin or you're going for another tour?-.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

The library had provided them almost thirty books with the different historic records of the troves; they had decided to review the records before jumping to theories about the potential fourth trove.

Azriel was used to long hours of work, but he was not used to spend time reading. Reading for entertainment and reading for work were two completely different things; and Azriel did not like the latter.

Sighing, he looked over his book towards the priestess. -Have you found anything interesting?- he asked her.

She smiled, looking down as she wrote down notes on what she had just read. -As i said five minutes ago, i am still learning of previous locations of the troves-.

His shadows swirled with excitement as she spoke, begging him to let them go towards her.

He had been so surprised at her reaction when he let go one of the shadow's towards her earlier today. She had smiled when she saw the little black swirl of air, her eyes had lighten up for the first time since the nightmare.

His heart had squeezed so hard at the sight of her, something lighting up in him as well, as he saw happiness and not fear at the shadows he possessed.

Timidly, he send a couple of his shadows to grab Gwyn's pen.

-Hey!- She said, finally looking up to him. -Spy masters are supposed to be patient, Azriel- she said -you get bored too easily.-

He smiled, sending the same set of shadows to close the book and notepad she was writing with.

She laughed, -you're impossible, at this rate we are never leaving this court-.

-Would it be so bad?- He whispered.

She dropped her smile slightly, looking deeply into his eyes. -No... it would not-.

She blushed, and looked away from him.

Faster than he could see, she stood and began walking towards the door -let's go for a walk, stretch our legs-.

He stood and walked behind her, -i know the perfect place- he said.

The sky of the Day Court was pink and purple as Gwyn and Azriel walked to one of the castle's gardens. He thought of taking her to the small lake at the entrance of the palace, so they could sit and watch as dusk came upon them.

-How many times have you been in the palace?- Gwyn asked, -you seem to know the palace well-.

-I've been here very often, Helion and i were... close a couple of centuries ago. So i spent most of my free time over here, never in Velaris. - He said, surprising himself as he admitted to Gwyn yet another secret he had not even told his family.

She smiled, -I am envious shadowsinger, this court is beautiful-

-Wait until you see the beach-

He guided her to a wooden bench in front of the lake, sitting right besides a flower field.

Sitting next to one another, they stood quiet for what felt like hours looking at the sky. The sun slowly dispersing from their view, and the moon replacing the shine above them.

-I love the night sky- Gwyn said, - i hate sleeping though-.

He felt the shift of her thoughts, and how her mind began to drift to the darkness that was each night. He knew because he felt the same each night.

-I see my brothers each night, i see their faces as they burn my hands with oil and fire. I can sense the smell, the pain and the taste of metal. It's like i relieve it each night- he blurted out.

Gwyn's face shifted to look at him, a worried look on his face.

-Sometimes, very few times it is someone else. I have dreamt that is Rhys, Cassian and my mom. Those nights are the worst, when it is not me enduring the pain but someone i love- He said, looking down to his hands - i was kept in darkness for years, but the darkness that i feel in my dreams in unbearable. I always cower away from it, from the fire and the smell of oil. When you said this morning, that you felt like a coward; i understood that. Because i could not even kill my brothers myself, i needed Cassian and Rhys-.

Unsure if she would leave if he continued, he dropped his head on his hands, -I was unable to save my mother, i am still unable to visit her. Because i was a coward for not trying to escape with her-.

-Your mom is still alive?- She said

-Yes, she lives in a cottage outside of the Illyrian Camps; Rhys has provided everything for her. If i visit her, it would just be a reminder of what i caused upon her-. Remembering the beautiful dark haired woman, his eyes began to cloud in tears. He pictured her honey eyes, the golden brown skin surrounded of scars caused by his father. She always smelled like rust and old leaves, which others thought disgusting but Azriel found comforting. -She had the most beautiful voice. She taught me how to sing, she always said that music will accompany me in the darkness.-

Lifting his head and looking at Gwyn he continued, -i have done horrible things in this life, things that should torture me and torment me. But i am selfish and a wimp because the only thing that tortures me at night is what they did to me, not what i have done to others -.

Gwyn's hair fell on her face as she looked at him, the deep blue of her eyes tormenting him as he waited for her response. She was analyzing him, looking through him and through the words he had just spoken.

-You... you are far from selfish, Azriel- she said, dropping her gaze to her hands -I don't know how you have not realized it. But thanks to you i am alive. You saved me, even though you were completely outnumbered. There were ten men, and only one of you. -

She lifted her gaze, anger and determinations shinning in her eyes, -you are valued by everyone around you, you saved more than just me. You saved Nesta, Feyre, Cassian, Rhys and Mor. You saved the priestesses. You saved the court. You have saved the world- she pointed her slender finger towards him -you told me today i was powerful; well you are powerful too, and you are not a coward.-

He could expect nothing else from her, she always tried to make everyone feel better; even if they did not deserve it.

-As for your mom, maybe we can work together in facing our fears. You can come with me to Velaris, and i'll go with you to visit your mom- She said, - We can train for it too, each day we walk to get near to our goal. Until one day, we are ready. But we do it together, not alone-.

He smiled, admiring the priestess as she talked. He should not be surprised she would challenge him to leave his comfort zone; that was what he appreciated the most about her.

Everyone else was contempt with him living and staying healthy.

Gwyn wanted him happy, she wanted him to live peacefully.

-Together, then. We will face our fears together- He said, extending his hand.

She extended hers, and grabbed his as she said -It's a bargain-.

Dark ink began to appear in the neck of the priestess; her blue eyes opened widely in surprise as he felt the bargain tattoo forming in his skin.

The shape of a lotus surrounded by spirals now rested in her neck.

Resilience and strength.

He looked over her, the long red hair falling on one side of her face, the blue eyes shinning brightly from the light of the moon, the freckles of her cheeks and nose, the tattoo inked in her smooth skin.

Beautiful, she was simply beautiful.

TAGLIST: @imsointobooks , @gwynkyrie , @trashforazriel

[capituloperdido1]

Masterlist

GWYNRIEL

One-Shots

Traitor (3 parts)

Series

A Court of Stars and Shadows

MOR/EMERIE

Hope You're OK

[capituloperdido1]

ACOSAS

Hello everyone! As always please let me know if you have any feedback or want to be added to the taglist.

Enjoy!

Warnings: Mention of SA and anxiety.

Chapter 2

The day had arrived.

She was leaving to the day court today, she was finally leaving the safety of the library.

Gwyn had begun to prepare as soon as dinner had been over, she had talked to Clotho and Merril; the latter had reluctantly accepted and had sent her with even more research prompts to look over during her stay in the Day Court. Cassian had given her a full month schedule of training, and had ensured that she packed the Valkyrae uniform as well as her favorite dagger.  Nesta and Emerie had given her a list of souvenirs to bring back; which included an autographed book of one her their favorite smut writer, who happened to be a member of the Day Court.

Everyone seemed ready for her to leave.

Everyone but her.

As much as it excited her, the terror in her bones had not let her enjoy the idea of the outside world.

As she took the last of her bags up to the house, she began to lose herself into her thoughts; who really ensured her that everything would be okay?

Last time she had been in the outside world she had been kidnapped and forced to a crazy Illyrian trial.

The time before that, well... it was better not to remember.

She was not ready to see other people, specially not men.

She looked up and notice that she was in the middle of the stairs leading to the house, with her hand in her chest and bag thrown in the floor.

Was she ready?

She wanted to be.

What was that she had promised her sisters?

Never again.

Never Again.

It was time to see the world.

-.-.-.-.-.

Azriel had been looking at Nesta for an hour, his sister in law had been going on the different things he needed to remember in order to keep Gwyn safe.

-And remember, she told me she was allergic to some types of flowers; and since i don't remember which ones they are it is just better if you just don't let her near flowers- Nesta said.

-Flowers... Nesta what are you saying?- Cassian said, -Gwyn is not a child you are leaving for Azriel to babysit, she is your friend-

He smiled, he knew Nesta a was protective over Gwyn; he understood it himself, even if he never showed it. He also understood the courage and bravery from the priestess to leave the library. He would ensure that nothing would happen to her, he would protect her and help her; even if that meant she could not see any flowers.

His shadows had been singing with excitement since Gwyn had accepted the offer, he had to admit he was excited as well. It was the first mission he had ever done that did not require murder at the end of it, he was protecting someone precious to the court, his family and even if he would not admit it, himself.

This would also be a time for him to think over his actions of the past few months, being away from the one Archeron sister he had tried to avoid.

He had been selfish, he knew that.

Before he could think more about the subject, the light voice of the priestess interrupted his thoughts -Nesta, i am not allergic to flowers- she said.

Azriel smiled instantly, she really knew how to make everyone feel better just by talking.

-I'm ready- she said approaching him.

-.-.-.-.-.-

Rhys had arranged to winnow them to the border of the Night Court and the Day Court, where Helion would be expecting them to take them to his palace. According to Rhys, it had been Helion's idea to show Gwyn the beauty of the day court. Rhys had warned the priestess to be careful of the weather; the day court had the hardest summers, second only to the summer court. But according to Rhys, the cold of the Autumn arrived faster and stronger than in other courts.

Rhysand was right.

The border of the night court and the day court was cold in that afternoon, made even colder because of their surroundings. The forest that separated both courts was now attacked by heavy rushes of wind. It made Gwyn overwhelmed, as if the mother had chosen the coldest weather to make her body colder than it already was. She felt chills running through her body at the sight of the trees; it reminded her of the Blood Rite.

Vile had risen to her throat.

She was trying so hard to control it, her nerves and her thoughts. But taking this step had been harder than she would admit, specially because being surrounded by trees did not allow her to see the sun; it also did not seem to have an exit.

The sound galloping coming near them startled her, and the sight of 3 gold carriages with the most majestic white stallions waited came into view. Stopping barely feet away from them, the carriage doors opened; out of them stepped a beautiful man wearing a gold crown on top of his long black hair. His white robe showed off the beauty of his brown skin, and his smile made his face even more beautiful.

-Gwyn, this is Helion, High Lord of the Day Court- Rhysand mentioned.

Instantly, Gwyn bowed in front of the man; nervousness and fear creeping upon her.

-It is a pleasure to meet you Valkyrae, we have heard wonders about you- Helion said, his voice smooth and soft. -Thank you for coming to my court, i am hoping your stay will be enjoyable and you'll get to see real beauty; the night court has nothing on us-.

She smiled shyly, unsure of sharing her voice with the male.

A tingly feeling on her hand distracted her, she looked over her hand to find a shadow circling her hand as if trying to calming her. She breathed, the shadow giving her a sense of security.

Thank you Azriel.

-Thank you for having me, my lord-she said

Helion smiled broadly, -you heard that Rhys? She is respectful, unlike you and your friends -.

The two lords embraced each other and continued talking.

Gwyn did not listen.

She looked over to the shadowsinger, who seemed oblivious of the shadow on her hand. Maybe it had escaped from his side; maybe he had not sent it.

-.-.-.-.-.-

Helion had given her and Azriel their own carriage, he had made it a point to give her as much space as possible. She was deeply grateful for that.

He had explained that his palace was upon a mountain, surrounded by the main city; he had called it Lux, the city of light.

-Have you even been in the Day Court?- she asked Azriel.

-Yes, but it has been a while- he answered.

The sight of the end of the forest welcomed her, and as Gwyn peered out the carriage window she was graced with the most beautiful green fields. Grass and flowers of every color decorated the mountains, the smell of clear air filled her nose; the day court was beautiful.

The small village homes with farm animals became more frequent as they travel up the mountains, and as the city became clear, she found that the houses of the city circled the palace sitting at the top of the mountain.

The palace was clear, shining and reflecting the last of the sunshine; it was decorated with gold and silver, sculptures of every mythical animal at the top of every tower.

Beyond the palace, the sea was the perfect companion of the city; the sun reflected in the water transforming the transparent liquid into golden waters.

-I... this is beautiful- she said, tears threatening to come.

-it really is- Azriel responded.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

The initial annoyance of having to spend time with Helion was erased at the sight of Gwyn enjoying the view of the Day Court, it was worth it, if it made her smile as she did right now.

He had to admit, the sight was beautiful. The landscape of the Day Court was always one of his favorites. Even if the palace was rather flashy and not very secure.

-We should take a walk on the beach one day- he said to her.

She smiled even brighter -that sounds like a plan shadowsinger-.

Once they arrived, Helion organized a staff of females to guide Gwyn into the palace. Hesitant to leave Gwyn by herself, he sent a shadow to follow her. His shadows obey his every command, even the unconscious ones; he had felt Gwyn's distress when they winnowed into the Night Courts Border, and his mind had told him to do anything to calm her down. It wasn't until he felt her staring at him that he noticed how a shadow circled her hand in comfort.

It surprised him, again.

But he was glad that the dark power he possessed could be used for something good at last.

Helion approached him smiling, -I hope your stay will be enjoyable, i have accommodated your old room. I hope you don't mind-. Azriel felt heat rising to his cheeks, Helion knew how to make things awkward.

-Thank you, my lord- he responded.

He laughed, grabbing his shoulders -let's go, i'll invite you to a drink-.

The palace had not changed much since Azriel had been there, the same extravagant gold decorations shined in every corner of the building. Helion had changed the colors of the furniture into creams and whites, accentuating the light and life that the glass windows provided.

-I was surprised when Rhysand told me it was you who was coming, i thought he would sent Cassian- Helion started, -it seems as if your high lord was adamant to keep you away from Velaris, i wonder why that is-.

Azriel followed the male into the only room that had stone walls. Helion's study had dark wooden shelves in the left side of the room, with a golden map of Prythian as the center table and wooden chairs surrounding it. This was the only place of the castle the high lord never changed, the place where only his trusted people entered.

-I am sure he had his reasons- Azriel responded.

-Rhysand is worried about you- Helion started

Right to business then.

-I am unsure of what you mean- Azriel responded.

Helion scuffed, -Azriel, drop the formalities. It is me who you are talking to. I have known you for longer than most of your friends, i know you - Grabbing a set of cups, the high lord served him what smelled like whiskey.

They sat across each other, the high lord had taken his crown off and was looking at him with deep seriousness. -Rhysand has commented about your fixation with a certain female of his court, someone who according to him you can't love-.

Well then, why was Rhysand sharing that with Helion?

He was going to kill his High Lord.

-How does this involve you?- Azriel said, adding bite into his tone.

-Because i have been in your shoes, shadowsinger- the male said. -I have had many partners in my life, but no one will fill my heart as she did-.

He knew who Helion was talking about.

-But you don't see her in my arms, do you?- Helion continued, -That is because she made a choice, one that i was not okay with; but she choose him over seeing us both being killed-

A silent moment passed, Azriel daring to look at the powerful man in front of him.

-Beron is not her mate, i am. And there is a reason why i am not besides her, even though we have loved each other for centuries- Helion explained - He became obsessed  with the idea of owning her, and was blinded by how much he thought he deserved her. She chose to reject our mating bond, and to stay by his side forever.-

-I do not resent her, rather i love her even more for her bravery. I have spent every living moment praying the mother to give me her courage, courage to challenge Beron and save her. But i am unable to- dropping his head, Helion's voice dropped as he talked -Azriel, i am not here to tell you who to love; i am here to tell you that the choice is not yours, or the fox boys. The choice is Elain's-.

Azriel knew that, he knew Elain was not a price to be fought over.

-I am also here to tell you that this trip is not only to find the fourth trove, but also to find yourself- Helion continued, -You will not do any spy work, no torture or military work. You will simply assist and protect the priestess warrior as much as she needs you. Take this as a chance to think about the decisions you have made over the last centuries, it will be the first time you're away from your family for so long. -

-Did Rhysand say that?- he responded.

-No. This is me talking as a friend - Helion answered, -If you find that at the end of this you actually love her, then go for it. But if you find that there might be another reason over your fixation of her, maybe it is time to let your idea of love go. Maybe it is time to relearn what you think being with someone is-.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

Gwyn loved her room, the white furniture and rose gold accentuation made her feel peaceful and happy. A canopy bed at the end of the room with curtains of flowers seemed like the most comfortable and cozy thing she seen. There was a small study and pair of shelves on one side; the changing room and bathroom connected with one another, forming practically a hallway on the side of the room.

This was the fanciest thing she ever experienced.

Dropping the last of her bags Gwyn decided to take a bath before going to bed, the females who had helped her get in her room had told her that supper would be in the individual rooms for today; giving them time to rest to begin working tomorrow.

Once she had bathed, changed and ate; she sat on the fancy bed, immediately feeling the softness of the mattress. Laying down, Gwyn prayed that the bed would allow her to have better dreams; maybe she would finally be able to sleep without being awaken by nightmares, maybe all she needed was a comfortable mattress.

Screams of children sounded loud in her ears, Gwyn awoke in the hard bed from the temple of Sangravah.

Where was her sister?

She stood, looking for her sibling as her ears adjusted to the sounds of screams. Someone was here, someone was hurting the girls at the temple.

-Gwyn- Catrin said, -we need to keep them safe-.

Her sister came towards her with almost a dozen children trailing behind her. -What is happening?- Gwyn muttered

-They are here, Hybern is here. You need to get out of here, take the kids to the lake exit. I will stall them- Her sister gave her a small hand to hold on to. Unable to say anything Gwyn saw her sister go into the source of the screams.

Don't go, she wanted to say, you'll die.

Let me go, you deserve to be alive. Not me.

The high pitch of her sister's scream ringed in her ears, Gwyn could do nothing as she heard her sisters voice begging for the males not to touch her. She heard the laughter of the men as they took turns on her, she felt the cries of other priestesses as they all suffered the same fate.

And Gwyn did nothing,

Gwyn stood in place, paralyzed by fear.

Letting everyone around her die, at the hands of Hybern.

Startled, sweaty and with tears filling her eyes, Gwyn awoke from her nightmare.

She did not know where she was.

Panicking, she ran outside of the door. She needed to escape, needed to get back to the library; she was not in Velaris.

As she opened the door frantically, the door in front of her was opened with a thud.

She stood still, shaking and unable to say anything.

A male figure came out of the door rushing towards her; she flinched.

-Gwyn... Gwyn it's me- the male voice said.

She knew the voice, she knew the male talking to her.

Her vision became clearer, as she took a pair of honey eyes looking worried at her. She took in the golden brown skin, the short trimmed hair. She scented night-chilled mist and cedar.

Recognizing the male, she let her vulnerability show.

Gwyn dropped to her knees, letting the weight of the dream settle upon her.

She was safe, she was in the day court.

She was not alone.

She was with Azriel.

TAGLIST:

@imsointobooks , @gwynkyrie

[capituloperdido1]

Update coming soon

Hi everyone, i am so happy you liked the beginning of my fic. I will be posting soon during the week, hopefully, i can post updates of this fic around 2 times a week.

I will also upload this in AO3 soon!

Let me know if you want to be tagged!

ACOSAS Masterlist

[capituloperdido1]

ACOSAS

Chapter 1

Here is the first chapter, please let me know what you guys think! Warnings: Anxiety Attack, mentions of SA

There was not a night, in which the shadowsinger did not wake up sweating after his night terrors. It had become a routine for him, to see the flames in his dreams, to see the smiles and dark eyes of his so-called brothers while they laughed at his pain. At first, he would find ways to comfort himself, he would read, pray to the Mother, and even journal (a suggestion given to him by his blonde friend). However, after the years passed, and his nightmares did not disappear, he had come to realize that the nightmare was a punishment from the cauldron. The scars, the nightmares, the fact that he did not have a mate; it was all a punishment for the horrors that he had committed. So he accepted the nightmares, he accepted the scars, the accepted the loneliness, he accepted the punishment Azriel rolled over the bed, taking off the sheets that had covered his body; and sat at the edge of the bed. He took a couple of seconds to look around his room. Five... the grey walls, the black wooden desk, the leather chair in front of the fireplace, the basket of dirty clothes, and the book that the priestess had let him borrowed. Four... the satin sheets on his bed, the trim curls on his head, the fleece black pants he wore, and the wooden decorations that surrounded his bed. Three... the chirping of birds in the morning, faint music from Velaris, and the sound of trees moving with the wind. Two... whiskey and roses. One... the taste of the chocolate pudding the house had given him the night before. He exhaled as his mind acknowledged reality. Sometimes, when the nightmares were too real; he woke up afraid to be in that cell... prison that his childhood self had called home. He stood, looking for his fighting leaders as he got ready to go to the training ring. Maybe the day ahead was not going to be bad, maybe something good might happen. Maybe, a certain auburn-haired priestess would be there. -.-.-.-.- The sun was just rising, the cold autumn wind tickled his wings as he flew up the house of wind. As if she had guessed he wanted to see her this morning; Gywn moved with gracious velocity while she tried the new obstacle arrangement that was meant for that morning. Azriel smiled to himself, one thing that he admired of the priestess was her willingness to overcome any challenge. She had become known around Prythian, the priestess, and her Valkarie friends, as the fiercest women in their territory. Some feared the group of females, others wanted to become like them. After the Valkaryes had conquered the mountain, many more priestesses had come to train with them; even some Illyrian females, not more than a dozen, had decided to learn the ways of the warriors. Nesta, Emerie and Gwyn had to help him and his brother train the new recruits; so they had resolved that the hour after the normal training would be focused on the three of them. However, over the last few months, he had a few one on one training sessions with the priestess. Once her smell hit him, his shadows became restless; one mischievous shadow shooting towards Gwyn and flying around her. They always reacted to her that way, as if they were anticipating throughout days and nights when they would see her again. At first, Azriel had been mortified; he worried that being surrounded by his shadows would make her uneasy, afraid or even disgusted. But, as always, the priestess had surprised him by smiling and opening her hands every time she saw them; welcoming his shadows with eagerness, not fear. -I was wondering if you would come today- she said playing with his shadow. Stop, come back he said to the shadow; but again it ignored him and flew around her hair as if saying i'm not leaving until i want to. -I had a feeling you were going to fail the training course, i could not miss it- he said jokingly. -mhm, sure shadowsinger- she smiled, taking a sip of her water - we both know I'm faster and more agile than you ever were- He laughed and took his leather jacket off A moment passed, and he confessed,- i couldn't sleep- -me neither- she said smiling sadly. They had never talked

about it.

What kept them up at night, they didn't need to. They resorted to talking about books, trains and make snarky remarks to each other. He had to admit that her competitiveness matched his own; and in some way, it helped him forget about his nights. -well... how about you time me, and then i'll time you shadowsinger- she said. He smiled, he appreciated that she never pushed him; and in return, he never pushed her. He knew her terrors, he had been there to witness most of them. But unlike him, he prayed to whatever deity existed that she could overcome them. If there was one person in this world who did not deserve one bad dream was Gwyneth Berdara. -hmm... but let's make a bet priestess- he smirked. -you win, ill bring you the stash of chocolate brownies Nesta hides in the house. I win and you will let me look at more of your notes on mind-stilling-  The priestess had come one night with stashes of papers in her hands; she had dumped the papers in his lap and said - i have not finished it, don't judge the writing. But read it, and try some of the exercises, it has helped me with... you know- From that moment on, he read mind stilling exercises for his anxiety after a bad dream. Gwyn smiled, tying her long hair up in a ponytail. His shadows stilled for a moment, not in fear, but in admiration. -sounds like a deal shadowsinger- He dared to open his mind to his shadows, curious to hear what they were thinking; beauty, they said, autumn beauty. -.-.-.-.- Somehow, they ended up training until Nesta and Cassian came up the stairs. Neither of them had completed the course without busting their asses in the sand at least once. However, she was happy to convince him that even if there was no winner she would let him borrow another copy. Azriel knew that meant he would have to bargain with the house (who somehow held the brownies away from anyone) and exchange some smut books for at least one or two. His brother approached him smiling; after the Blood Rite and all the mess that had been the last couple of months, Cassian and Nesta were finally able to plan their mating ceremony. Azriel never pictured Cassian as the man who would talk for hours about how Magnolias and Lilies could not go together. But his brother was so happy, so excited to plan his ceremony; that he had been part of every decision made until that point. Nesta was more than happy to lay off the decisions of lighting and colors for their mountain ceremony; she was more focused on the guests. Cassian had insisted on inviting some of the high lords; to satisfy Rhys and make it somehow a place to prepare for Koschei. Nesta had refused and had threatened to poke Rhysands eyes out if someone other than Hellion, and Kallias arrived to their ceremony. -hey Az, you look like a whole building fell on your face man- said Cassian while tying a bun with a string of leather. -and you look like you need an ass-kicking, should I tell Nesta to humiliate you in the ring again?- he responded, smiling while he remembers the oldest Archeron sister kicking his brother out of the ring in their last hand to hand combat As the rest of their class arrived, Azriel took the chance to get near Gwyn. - Listen, I know I didn’t let you go back to your chambers. But... thank you, for ... you know being here - he said while scratching the back of his neck. She smiled. And his shadows danced happily looking at her dimples and red lips, beautifully matching her hair. -you know Azriel, I know I’ve never said it. But as your friend, I will be here whenever you need me. If you need to talk, fight, or read some smut... I’ll be here - Gwyn said. He nodded and attempted to show that her words had not just opened a light inside him that for five hundred years had disappeared. -thank you Gwyn-. -.-.-.-.-.- After the training, Azriel walked to his chamber when he heard the voice of his brother in his head. I need you, there is a mission that needs attending. Now. He sighed, he hated that Rhys sounded upset every time he talked to him; but after the mess during solstice, he had not been able to make

things right with him. With anyone for that matter; he had avoided Rhys and Elain, too scared to face the feelings that surged when he now thought of the seer. He flew to Rhys house, landing at the roof where his brother watched the bright morning of Velaris. - Azriel- his brother acknowledged him with a nod. After a couple of minutes, his high lord spoke. -how close are you with Gwyn, the priestess-. His eyebrows furrowed -why? Am I going to have to stay away from her too? - he said with an intentional bite in his tone. Rhys looked at him angrily -no. I need you and her for a new mission. One that requires trust, and your head on your brain, not your pants- -I would never think about her like that Rhys, not knowing what she had endured- he responded in a low voice. Rhys got close to him and put a hand on his shoulder - you’re right, I’m sorry. I know how much you respect and connect with her- -which is why I need you to take her to Helions library for a couple of weeks, I need her to do some research on the possibility of a fourth trove and how to help Vassa- It took Azriel a minute to process what his brother was asking of him... No, what he was asking of Gwyn. -no- he responded. Rhys grabbed his shoulder a little harder -what? What do you mean no?- -I mean that Gwyn will not leave the library under your orders. She is not ready for that- he said, his voice rising at the anger and protectiveness he felt in his chest. -how do you know that?- Rhys responded with the same tone. -because... because I know- Azriel answered -and you keep making decisions without regarding people’s feelings and fears, and that’s not okay Rhys- He knew that was unfair; his brother did what he did for the sake of the court, for the sake of the world. -Azriel that is not your call to make- his brother said in a softer voice. -neither is yours, especially because you don’t even acknowledge her existence. Or any of the Valkyries for that matter- he moved away from his brother. It took him a minute to look at Rhys, who had a pained look in his eyes. -you’re right, I can’t argue with that- he sighed-I’m sorry, I know I should’ve talked to her first; and now I will. However, if she says yes, I will task you to protect and help her. I can’t send Cass because he is ... mated now- Azriel laughed sarcastically. Of course, he thought, leave it to Rhys to make his cut bigger with a few words. -of course my lord- he said, and shot up to the sky without saying goodbye.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

At the library at the bottom of the house, things were usually quiet. That was one of the reasons why Gwyn had begun to train; the library offered no distraction to her mind, no way to still it if thoughts raced through her. She had been shelving books that Merril had given her for the past hour; thinking and avoiding the memory of last night's nightmare. The blood, the rough hands holding her down, the children screaming. It was all too much, it was all too real. She had gone up in the morning to the training pit. To avoid sleeping, yes, but also because she somehow knew that Azriel would be there. She hated that he had to go through what she went through, but she was grateful for his presence at the moments when she needed him the most. Steps sounded at the end of the hallway, and Gwyn stiffened. They sounded male, heavy, and loud. She knew it was not Azriel, his shadows always let her know that he was approaching. She looked up from her book nervously, ready to run away if needed.... But that was her high lord looking at her with a sweet smile on his face -hello Gwyn, Valkyrie, Carynthian warrior- he smiled. And she realized that out of the three brothers, Azriel had the best smell. She liked the smell of night-chilled mist and cedar, the others smelled too sweat and too flowery for her taste. -high lord- she courtesy nervously. -please, don’t do that, we are practically family right ?- he said while offering her a bag that she had not noticed he carried. -I’m bringing you the best chocolate croissants in the city, Feyre told me you and Nesta enjoy chocolate at the same rate. I hope you like them- he placed them in her cart, knowing she would not touch him. Another set of steps sounded at the distance, and her sister appeared walking with rapid-fire towards her. - I told you to wait Rhysand- Nesta said. -I...it’s okay Nesta, thank you High... Rhysand— Gwyn said, opening the bag and smelling it. Damn... that was dark chocolate in the croissants; her favorite. -what can I do for you guys?- she said while taking a bite of the soft, sweet bread. -we were wondering if you wanted to dine with us tonight, here in the House, only Az, Cass, Nesta, Feyre and me- The High Lord said. - we have a proposal for you, but we want to talk to you about it first-. She looked at Nesta, who was stealing some of her croissants. - su...sure... I’ll gladly accept. It would be an honor - she smiled. -.-.-.- After her shift with Merrill ended, she went to her chambers to bathe quickly. She should change, she knew they dined casually, she wanted to fit in with the group. So she bathed, braided her hair and decided to wear a flowery blue dress that showed the mid of her back; it had a tight bodice and a skirt that flowed until the top of her knees. It had been a gift from Nesta, she had told her to use it whenever she wanted to practice what she would do when she went to Velaris for the first time. As she climbed up the stairs, she imagined what life would be like if she was brave enough to leave the library. Gods she wanted to be in the city, wanted to try the food, hear the music, look at the people. But it all scared her too much. She was waiting for an opportunity, she said to herself, an opportunity to escape the library and be dragged to the real world. The smell of roasted potatoes, beef, and vegetables filled her nose; she thanked the Mother that the house cook. she approached the dining room and smiled at hearing Nesta laugh so hard, probably at something her mate had said. She was happy that her sister had found a man that grounded her, filled her (in every sense of the way) and that respected her. She was a bit jealous that she had found a mate though, she had studied the relationships of mates for months, and understood that they were rare but only rare among powerless faes. Which meant, that the possibility of finding hers was minimum... or as Merril liked to say an absolute zero. -you came!- said Nesta, smiling. Gwyn strode down the hall to sit beside Nesta; her eyes looking around the room to acknowledge everyone who was there.

-thank you for inviting me - she said, coming out as barely a whisper. Rhysand approached with a smiled that brightened the entire room, - thank you for coming, Gwyn, i know the effort it must have been but i appreciate it-.

She smiled -those chocolate croissants were really persuasive my lord-. Rhysand got even bigger -look at you, already teasing me as Cassian does-. The house placed food in front of her, adding extra vegetables. To which she frowned "i didn't know you cared for my vitamins". She ate silently, admiring how the dynamic between all of them was. She couldn't deny the jealousy that threatened to rise, she missed having a family. No, she missed being able to enjoy family without the fear of the outside world suffocating her. Minutes, hours passed and they all kept talking. Azriel had changed his seats to be in front of her, the shadowsinger looking deeply at her while she played with her water. She felt even more comforted now that he was near her. Rhysand stood and cleared his throat -well, i'm sure Gwyn has had enough of our voices; so let's get to the point-. He approached her slowly and passed her a paper she had not noticed he carried. -we want to officially invite you to be part of this court- he started. -Everyone that is here admits that there is no one more deserving and capable to be the official scholar of the Night court-. He laid the paper in front of her. A contract, offering an obscene amount of money. -you... want me to work for you?- she said -yes, if you are comfortable doing this of course- he responded. The contract asked her to inform, research,and educate the leaders of the court, on different matters she would be asked to. -Before you accept- Azriel spoke softly, looking at Rhysand, -you should hear what the first mission would ask from you-.

Rhysand nodded, -we are looking for the possibility of a fourth trove, and we can only do so in the biggest library of the country.... in the day court-.

Leaving the library, she would not only leave the library but also the night court.

Was she ready for that?

-Would i go by myself?- she asked him

-No, you would go with Azriel as your bodyguard, or assistant, whatever you need from him- Rhysand responded.

She smiled, looking at the shadowsinger. - And you accepted this?-

His mouth quirked upward -if i didn't we would have had Nesta to deal with-.

This was it, this was the push she had asked for.

-Rhysand, i would be honored to be the scholar of your court- she said, - and i thank all of you for trusting me, i will not let you down-.

She looked around the room to find every single one of the court's members looking at her with loving, proud eyes.

She would go to the Day Court, she would find a way to help her friends and her world.

Gwyneth Berdara looked at her future companion, the beautiful male with eyes of honey that she would daydream about.

Who knows? Maybe this mission would bring them closer. Maybe they would finally talk about their nightmares, their fears.

Maybe she would finally be able to show Azriel how she felt about him. And maybe this time, he would listen.

[capituloperdido1]

A Court of Stars & Shadows

This is a project i am working on currently, i am aiming for it to be slow-burn romance where we can see both Azriel and Gwyn grow into the couple we deserve. Warnings about this project: it will contain smut, mentions of anxiety, and SA. I will put the warnings of every chapter at the beginning. I hope you guys like this idea! Let me know any suggestions or comments!

Masterlist:

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Synopsis:

Gwyn was waiting for a chance,

A chance to leave the library,

A chance to travel the world,

A chance to confess the man she loved how she felt about him.

She was also waiting for courage,

Courage to walk around Velaris by herself,

Courage to be more open about her fears,

Courage to face said fears.

The chance comes when the High Lord of the Night Court asks her to research a potential fourth trove in the library of the Day Court; accompanied by none other by the man she is in love with, Azriel.

Azriel is angry,

Angry with the Mother,

Angry with Rhysand,

Angry with himself.

He is also tired,

Tired of the torture,

Tired of the nightmares,

Tired of not being enough.

When Gwyn accepts to work with him in the Day Court, he finds himself both relieved and annoyed. Relieved to help his friend, with whom he seems to have a very deep connection. And annoyed that he will have to spend more than a month with a High Lord who constantly flirts with him.

The journey will push them to challenge, protect and love each other in ways that they never thought possible. It will make them question themselves, as well as everything they have fought for. It will show them how fears can become reality. But most importantly, the couple will relearn their idea of love, with each other.

[capituloperdido1]

Traitor Pt 3 (Final)

Hello everyone!

So happy that you guys liked my little story, i am hoping to write much more in the future. So please let me know if there is anything in particular you would like to read. Here is pt3 and last part of the Traitor fic. There is a 'prequel' and it is very angsty, if you guys want that as well let me know.

Enjoy!

It had been three days, three days without seeing Azriel. He didn't show to practice, neither he looked for her in the library.

Coward, coward, coward

She was so mad, how was saying sorry so hard for him?

Or was he embarrassed that he lost to her? no, Azriel would never be embarrassed about that. He was just too afraid to face her.

Or maybe he didn't care, maybe he wanted to fix things with Elain and not her.

Yeah, that might be the answer.

That afternoon Nesta had asked her to come over to the house of wind and stay over with her while Cassian was away in a mission. She climbed the stairs of the library, while preparing to be in the same house as Azriel.

He was not talking to her, fine, she would not talk to him.

Nesta was waiting for her at the door, "please don't kill me, please, please". She said while grabbing Gwyns bags, "my sisters came over for dinner and have not left, i can kick them out but we have to wait a bit for Rhysand to leave Nyx at Amren's"

She smiled

Perfect this night has started perfectly.

"Of course, yeah no problem."

They arrived at the room, and Gwyn felt panic rising to her throat at the sight of the middle Archeron sister. She was probably pissed at Gwyn for all that had happened, she probably hated Gwyn because of it.

"Hi Gwyn!" said Feyre.

"Feyre" she bowed, "thank you for having me".

Elain looked at her, smiled, and kept talking to Feyre.

Well, that's better than the slap she had expected.

She sat besides Nesta and prayed that her High Lord would come soon.

------

An hour past, and the four women were tangled in a conversation about wine when a knock came at the door.

Gwyn felt a tug at her chest; he is here it seemed to say.

Fuck.

"Im sorry to interrupt ladies" a breathy voice said, " i am here for my high lady and her sister". She turned around and faced the male speaking, he wore rather casual clothing compared to the illyrian leathers. His black tight shirt and cargo black pants accentuated his muscles, and his hair was messier than usual.

His eyes landed on hers, and his slight smirk fell.

Oh, great. I'm not happy to see you either, she thought.

Elain stood and quickly walked towards Azriel, but he did not break Gwyns stare; not even while he grabbed the arms of both women and they said bye to Nesta and her.

He looked at Nesta, "is this... a sleep over?" he said softly.

"yes, and you are very much not invited" Nesta responded.

He smirked, "ill be back" he looked at Gwyn.

"Don't leave" he said.

She looked away.

"Please" he said to her, his voice pained and desperate.

And with that, he left.

Nesta smiled and crossed her arms. "You planned this didn't you?" Gwyn asked her sister, "mhm, he helped me get a mate i help him find the balls to talk to you" she answered.

-----------

Gwyn was not one for drinking, but waiting for Azriel to come had made her so anxious that she had considered asking the house for Cassian's oldest bottle of Whiskey to drink it all by herself. Instead, she had been served a big, fat piece of chocolate cake; accompanied by water.

Nesta was in front of her, watching with admiration as Gwyn devoured the cake.

Mother, she loved chocolate.

The tug at her heart began once more, the feeling of comfort and hurt that Azriel brought upon her growing as the seconds flew by.

"He is here" she whispered to Nesta, "I am not ready to face him".

"He is not ready to face you" she answered.

A soft knock came at the door, and the creak of the wooden door was the most terrifying thing Gwyn had ever heard.

"Shadowsinger" Nesta said, "you are just on time". Nesta stood, grabbed Gwyns hand and squeezed it softly, "i need to go fix some paperwork for Cassian, could you please stay with Gwyn while i come back?"

Really Nesta? Thanks.

"Sure, thank you" he answered.

-----------

She did not feel Nesta leaving, neither she looked up to see where Azriel stood in the room. Her hands had become the most entertaining thing in the world at that moment, and nothing would change that.

"Gwyn" he called.

She felt him getting closer, and it took all her will not to jump to his arms.

He stopped, "please, look at me".

"No" she said, "you don't get to demand for me to stay, for me to talk to you, for me to look at you".

Cauldron was he clueless, did he not have a sense of communication?

He is trying, the voice of her heart seemed to say.

"I know that, but... I need... I need to see your eyes" Azriel said. Slowly, she felt him kneel in front of her; not too close as to startle her, but close enough that she could feel the smell of night-chilled mist and cedar filling her nose.

"May i touch you?" He said, stretching his hand towards her.

Yes, please

She only nodded softly.

His hands grabbed her chin and lifted it to face him. "There you are" he smiled, "there they are". His eyes looked deeply into hers, as if he was trying to memorize each feature in them; he seemed... desperate to memorize her. As if what he was about to say would make her disappear from his side forever.

" I have a whole speech prepared" Azriel said, "but i don't think you're the type to want to hear rehearsed words, so let me give it a try..."

Quieter than she had ever heard him, Azriel began " I have always been alone, the shadows and the dark being my best friends..."

"I only knew friendship and love when Rhys opened his home to me; but even as my brothers and i grew, i still felt alone.... empty. I longed for something that would be entirely mine, something that no one else would share, something i would never have to part with." His voice breaking, Azriel inhaled and tucked his hands in his pockets.

"I met Mor when she was very young, she was such a happy girl; always teasing and playing, always happy even with the shitty family she was born into. She lightened my days, she gave me a reason to wake up in the morning; i began to love her before i expected" his voice filled with pain he said, "and i loved her for five hundred years..."

"I thought she had to be my mate, because no one else would make me as happy as her; and i waited for five hundred years for the mating bond to click. Disregarding her feelings, her insecurities and fears; i pushed my feelings down her throat, hoping she would pity me enough to give me a chance".

His confession broke her. What kind of thoughts went through the mind of this beautiful man to say anything like that?

"Meeting Elain was different, i was finally able to help someone as broken as me. I had a purpose beyond violence. I looked forward to sharing time with her, i wanted push her to be better, to forget about that undeserving human boy" He continued, "once she began to get better, i realized that i was not the only thing grounding her. Her sisters, the wraiths, gardening, and even her mate gave her courage to keep going. And i am so selfish, selfish enough to begin loving her; demanding from her what she is not ready to give".

"The winter solstice that i tried to give her the necklace, i did it out of a desire for her to be mine. My thoughts were never about how much i loved and admired her, but rather that i deserved Elain, that three brothers and three sisters made more sense than what the cauldron had chosen".

Gwyn shuttered, her heart squeezing lightly at the words coming from his mouth.

"But i realized long ago, that Elain deserves to choose her own path; neither Lucien nor me are entitled to her, she should be master of her own destiny" He said, no pain noticeable in his voice. "I had to let go, for my sake, my court's sake; but most importantly, for her".

"I could tell you more about my mistakes, and i will, but i have to explain why i gave that necklace to you." He moved closer to her, their knees touching. "That night, Gwyn, the conversation we had made my heart sing; you changed my mood so quickly, and you didn't even know it. You looked, so free, so competitive, so happy".

"Then, after i left that night, i realized that i wanted to see your smile again; so i left the necklace to Clotho and asked her to bring you some joy in that lonely solstice night. And my mind pictured your smile once you received that necklace. The selfish being that i am, has kept that memory in my heart; selfishly locked away so that no one will steal it from me" He smiled and looked into her eyes, "and then you kept showing me so many surprising sides of you. No one challenges me to better as you do, no one wants to see me bite dust as you do. No one is interested in what i think about coffee, or what my favorite mystery novel is. You have heard my voice more time than anyone before."

"You have showed me many times that you're my only match Gwyn".

He paused, as if the words weighted on his heart as much as they weighted on hers.

"You are my best friend, the person i admire the most in the world. I admire your courage, your patience, your perseverance, your happiness. I love the way you show love to your friends. I love how much of a fierce warrior you are. And even though i made a mistake by re-gifting the necklace, i could not think of anyone that deserves to be pampered and loved as much as you"

He stopped, inhaled and touched the top of her hands.

The happiest feeling crept into her heart, her feelings were not one sided.

He saw her.

She saw him.

But his eyes did not show the happiness she expected, not did they show the same desire that burned deep in her.

They showed fear, sadness, longing.

"But with all that i have said, i know i don't deserve you. I have hurt everyone I've ever loved, i have always been so selfish. I have been looking for a bond so desperately that i was blind to what i had right in front of me..."-"I have avoided confronting my fears of being alone, of facing my nightmares and acknowledging how much of a monster i can be. When i look at you, how much you have given me; i regret every moment i have not spent loving you".

He moved his hands away from hers, looked at them and shuttered.

She realized then, unlike her, his biggest fears and insecurities were visible for everyone to see. He hated his hands, he believed them to be the proof of his monstrosity.

He did not know how wrong he was.

Finally, after what felt like eternity he said, " i am sorry Gwyn, i have not been the man you deserve; and i will forever regret that i lost you before i ever had you."

Tears falling down her cheeks, Gwyn grabbed his hands and placed them in her face. How much courage had those words taken? How much courage had even touching her taken?

"Az... you're so blind" she responded with a sob. She turned her face to his hands and placed a slight kiss inside of his hands, "these hands saved me, they are so precious... you are so precious to me"

She looked into his eyes, "i was hurt because i wanted.... i wanted you to be honest with me"

"I thought the necklace had meant that you thought of me" she smiled sadly, "for the first in my life i thought someone had chosen me, someone had thought of me first".

He looked away sadly, "i know that, and i am sorry".

She interrupted him, " I lied when i said i never wore it, i wore it every day, every hour" she laughed softly and grabbed the empty space in her neck that once held her necklace, "i even bathed with it".

He smiled. And damn if she wanted to kiss him now even more than ever.

"Once i found out it had been you who had gifted it to me, i ... finally was able to confirm my feelings towards you" Gwyn confessed. "I knew i fell in love with you the moment in the training ring when you admitted you had given the necklace to me."

Was she really saying this?

Yes

She closed her eyes and talked before her courage disappeared.

"Azriel i am in love with you" she breathed, "i fell in love with the man saw the darkness in me, and did not run away. The one that taught me to fight my nightmares way. The one that listened to me ramble about the silliest things. The one that made an effort to open his heart to me, and answered every question i asked him" she laughed. "After the first night on the training ring; i knew you would be my best friend, my confidant. Once i shared more and more nights with you, i couldn't stay away... i can't stay away from you"

Placing his hands in her chest she said, "i love you, all of you; the spy, the friend, the brother, the shadowsinger"

She didn't dare to look deeply into his eyes, afraid of what feelings laid beneath them.

"You are my center, you are my hope, my ladder to keep climbing up the pit of darkness my mind is. I will never be enough for you; for the pure and innocent heart you have. But if you give me a chance, i will treasure you for eternity". Tears scrolled down her face as she spoke, "I am not you mate, nor i am what you were looking for. But i will fight beside you every step of the way, because you more than anyone deserves happiness".

There. I said it.

She took her hands away from his, looked down and waited.... Waited for him to stand and leave, to laugh and mock her.

But he didn't.

He kneeled there, in front of her.

Shocked

Happy

.... Happy

He was happy; in fact, he seemed joyous.

A grin emerged in the male's face, bigger and brighter than she had never seen before.

Grabbing her hand, he pulled them up.

There they were, facing each other; looking deeply into each other's eyes when Azriel said: "the one that does not deserve you is me". He came closer to her, grabbed her waist and pulled her body towards his "my best friend, my love. I want you to be my entire world Gwyn".

He smiled and pulled a strand of hair behind her ear. His face coming even closer to hers, "i am not worthy of your confession, your heart, much less your body". His nose touched hers, "but give me a chance, i will treasure you until the end of times".

She smiled, nodded and closed her eyes.

Warmth filled her body as Azriel's lips closed upon hers. Soft, warm and gentle. Moving in a pace that would not startle her, he grabbed her neck to pull her even closer to him. He took his time to explore her mouth, kissing every corner. "Thank you Gwyn, for choosing me" he said, "i have found my light where i never thought looking". He kissed her nose, her forehead and her lips. "Now that i have you" he said, not leaving an inch of space between their mouths, "i will never leave you".

-------

As they kissed, something golden and long appeared in Gwyns mind, her chest seemed to swollen at the sight of it. The golden string settling in front of her and pulling her to reality.

She flinched at the same time Azriel did.

Their eyes meeting once again.

And right there, she knew...

"Mate" they said.

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Traitor Pt2 (Gwyn & Azriel)

Hey Everyone, thank you for the nice reaction to my first fic yesterday. I am so happy to share this next part with you; i apologize ahead for the horrible description of the fighting scene. Let me know what you think! I have one more part and the 'prequel' written and ready to post either tonight or tomorrow depending on what you guys think.

Enjoy!

Nesta smiled, "well, i think you two would look so good together". She moved to be in front of her, " but... these feelings... I don't think they are one-sided" she explained. "Listen, Elain and Azriel have a history, and i am so thankful that he helped my sister after everything we went through. If it had not been because of him, she would not have been able to smile, fight, or even garden anymore" she laughed. "However, they are both tangled with each other because they are an escape; Azriel is an escape from the mating bond, Elain is an escape for Az from healing and loving himself".

Gwyn's thoughts flew back to those nights where she saw him fighting until his knuckles bleed, the nights he seemed darker and quieter than usual.

"I am not saying he is innocent nor do i think he is not an asshole for doing what he did, but, i think you guys should talk" Nesta stood up. "However, for now, give him the silent treatment, he will probably go crazy if you don't talk to him for more than two days. Give him hell, he deserves it." She laughed.

They spent the rest of the day together, Nesta had requested to take her to the room upstairs in the house and pamper her. The house had felt Gwyn's distress and done everything possible to make her smile. Emerie and Mor had arrived in the afternoon and they all enjoyed books, unicorns, and chocolate until the night fell.

After spending a day with her friends, she had decided to stop moping around. She would eventually get better, her heart would stop aching. For now, she would keep crawling out the dark pit of her thoughts; she knew Nesta, Emerie, and Mor would wait for her at the top and hold her so that she would never fall again.

She was coming back to training tomorrow, better than ever. After all, wasn't that what he liked about her the most? Competitive as Azriel was, no one was like Gwyn, and he would know that better than anyone after she showed him how bad-ass she was.

-------

The light and warmth of the sun felt nice against her skin, she had arrived earlier than usual to stretch and practice with daggers. According to Nesta, today they would run individual courses; physical strength, endurance, fighting, and logic. She was at a disadvantage, she knew it, but that made her blood run with more excitement. She was going to show off a little today, impress everyone.

Nesta and Cassian arrived first, the former giving her a hug once she spotted her. "Don't think we will go lightly on you because you missed" Cassian teased, his look showing how relieved he was to see her. "Wouldn't dream of it general, that would ruin your reputation".

As the rest of the priestesses arrived, she began growing a little desperate. What if he didn't arrive? Maybe he was in a mission or maybe he had stayed elsewhere with Ela...

The sound of rattling wings interrupted her train of thoughts. The body of a large Illyrian appearing in her view; the shadowsinger dropped in the middle of the training ring, his knee and hand in the floor; spreading his beautiful wings.

Does he have to do that pose? What a show-off.

She quickly took her eyes off him and went to the water station to fix her hair, ignoring the feeling of his eyes stabbing her back. She knew he was approaching her, she knew he wanted to talk to her.

Smiling to herself she approached Emerie, "hey, ready for today?"

She felt Azriel stop in his tracks, she could even imagine the smile on his face.

Oh, she knew it was on.

Cassian had explained the course, there would be two stations for each section. The strengthened courses would make them carry heavy rocks from one side to the other, and hold a squat while increasing the weight. The endurance tasks would be to climb up a mountain-like wall and to use a bar to pull their bodies up as many times as possible. The logical courses were puzzles that formed the Night Court's symbols and the shields of the Valkyraes. Lastly, each of them would fight one female and one of the instructors (That included Nesta and Mor for those females uncomfortable touching males).

"you got this," said Nesta.

"remind me why did I come to training?" she responded.

-------

As every priestess finished their rounds of fighting, Gwyn began to wonder if Azriel would make sure to be her opponent. If he was as desperate as she thought he was, the spymaster would definitely volunteer.

As if reading her thoughts Azriel said, "I got this one". Stepping into the ring, the shadow singer approached her; he had taken his jacket off,  showing off the golden-brown skin that seemed drenched with sweat underneath his black shirt.

Shit, why does he know my weakness?

She could play that game.

She slowly unbuttoned her jacket as well; the Valkyrae uniform had a white tight tank-top that hugged her upper body curves.

Nesta smiled at her proudly, knowing it had taken courage to be so exposed.

It was thanks to her and her friends that Gwyn had done this, she was proud of the body she had.

"You have to own your body," Mor said, "Whether that is by showing skin or not, that is up to you, but only you can learn to love it"

She loved the skin she lived in, it had taken her so long to realize that. And now, looking at Azriel's shocked face; she felt more confident than ever.

She wrapped her hands with bandages, tied her crimson hair up in a ponytail; and looked at her opponent in the face.

"Elain... please don't leave" he had said, "Gwyn, can we talk later? J..just wait here" he had said.

Idiot.

He had implied it was not a big deal, he ignored her feelings and had hurt both her and Elain. She was angry, disappointed.

She knew that she meant something to him, whether friend or lover, she knew their moments had been real.

He needed to be knocked into reality.

She was going to make that happen.

"Alright, no weapons, try not to aim to the face; it ends when one of you taps the floor three times or when blood is drawn," Cassian said.

Azriel approached her, "Gwyn, before this starts... I want to say.."

"I'm ready! Let'sets begin" She said, moving away from him.

She was not going to let him manipulate her into feeling sorry for him; she had a right to be angry and she was going to use that against him.

She drew her hands up and began circling him, he was still looking at her with a hurt look on his face. Before he could react, she ran towards him and jumped, grabbing his shoulders to unsteady him while she moved above him. She landed while he was falling on his ass. "that will serve you" she whispered.

He got up, and now a competitive look was shining in the face of the shadowsinger. He landed a few punches around her arms, trying to weaken her defense position; but she was able to duck and jump backward. Using her legs, she kicked him in the stomach while he tried to grab her.

"I didn't take you for one that solves problems with violence," He said while panting.

She laughed sarcastically, "i don't, must mean something".

Nesta yelled, "careful with your left". She ducked a punch to her center, but Azriel was quick to turn her around and fire a kick in her legs that made her fall forward.

She stood quickly, rose her arms to her face, and smiled; "there you are Azriel, don't go easy on me" she told him.

The shadowsinger responded with a voice that was barely a whisper, "only you can match me Gwyn".

The fight continued for more than she expected; Azriel launched punches and she ducked, she launched punches and he ducked. She was getting tired, the adrenaline quickly fading.

The hurt and pain that had overwhelmed her the night before began to rise; this was so inmature, she should not be fighting to get his attention.

Doubts, fears and sadness tried to rise in her mind.

Light

Purpose

Love

No, she had to win this. For herself.

Then, right when she was going to give up, Azriel made a mistake: He left his stomach open while throwing a few punches to her shoulder. She gathered all her strength, anger, and sadness; lifted her leg, and jumped while kicking his center as hard as she could.

Gasping for air, Azriel backed away and slowly fell on his back.

The training ring felt quiet, the only sound being the hard and pained breathing of Azriel. She quickly sat her upper body on top of him, looked at his eyes, and grabbed his arms to immobilize him.

His eyes looked for the game he thought this fight had been, they looked for the Gwyn that would let anyone step over her. But she was not there anymore; as much as she loved him, she was done fighting to be with someone who would not fight for her. "Give up shadowsinger, i am not letting you win anymore," she said, her eyes clouding in tears.

Azriel's look changed from teasing to pained, he opened his mouth as he extended his hand and tapped the floor three times. And without giving him any time to talk, Gwyn stood up and fled the training ring.

-------

She did not know how Nesta managed not to throw up while climbing down ten thousand stairs; Gwyn had to stop at step two-thousand and sat while trying not to feel her head spinning.

She had done it, she had beaten Azriel, both physically and emotionally. She knew he was hurting, that he hated her reaction, and wanted her to talk to him. Hell, she wanted to talk to him.

No, not yet.

He was going to find her this time, she was not going to look for him.

As much as it hurt her, Azriel was in the wrong this time; she could not avoid and ignore her feelings just to make him feel comfortable.

But fuck, if it hurt to not smile at him. She had wanted to bring happiness to the spymaster, she knew something dark clouded his thoughts. Nonetheless, a mistake was a mistake; she had to prioritize herself.

She laid her back against the wall and covered her face with her hands, praying that the tug in her heart meant he would soon come.

Praying that he would finally be brave enough to face her.

Part 3

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Traitor (Gwyn & Nesta)

Hi everyone, this is my first official post. I decided to make this one shot in honor of Nesta’s and Gwyn’s friendship. While reading ACOSF their friendship was what made me cry the most. There is more parts to this, if you guys like it and want to see more please let me know.

"it's just a necklace" he had said, "I gave it to her because she was there for me, i didn't mean any harm". Right, no harm. Gwyn laughed to herself, she knew that it had been dumb to dream; that the smiles, the slight touches and nights of talking did not mean to him what it meant to her. He was in love, but not with her. Getting to the library was harder than usual, the darkness of her thoughts drowning her. Why would he love her? she was a reminder of the worst of humanity; Elain was light, while she was darkness. She couldn't blame him, why would someone want to spend the rest of their lives with a partner that needed more can than they could provide. She was the middle of the maze, the confusing, frustrating halls that make you thing that there is no escape. Elain was the light at the end of the tunnel. She touched her neck, forgetting that the necklace was not there anymore. She had given it back to him. -- "I don’t want it Azriel, it was not meant for me" she had said, keeping her voice composed and light. "Elain is hurt, she thought that it meant you were going to fight for her" she smiles. "Gwyn i gave to you, what happened between Elain and i has nothing to do with it" he had said. Idiot, she had thought, it has everything to do with this. "still, you should try returning it instead; besides, i cant wear it that much, i leave it in my rooms everyday". Lies, lies, lies. She wore it every day, whether in her neck or in the straps of her bra. That necklace had become the most priced possession in her live.

--

He was probably looking for Elain, talking to her after the whole mess. Gwyn was proud of keeping her composure, she had even tried to console Elain while her tears fell. Hell, she knew both Nesta and Azriel would run to Elain; not her. She was never the first choice, not as a priestess, not as a Valkyrae, not as a friend, not as a lover. "I'm so tired" she whispered to no one in particular, "i’m so fucking tired". Her room was duller than usual, where the walls always this pale? had she even made the bed this morning? why does it smell like mold ? A painful nod in her throat appeared, her eyes stung so bad. Breathing hard, she sat on her bed and grabbed the sheets. Tears began to roll, and there was no stopping the waterfalls that came out. She didn't care if anyone heard her, there was so much bottled in her heart; she wanted the pain to stop.

Tears for the love she felt,

tears for the friendships she had ruined,

tears for the loneliness...

tears for the cowardice,

tears for the fear

tears, tears, tears....

---- Morning had arrived, today she would not train, she would not sing or laugh. For the first time in her life, she had no positivism left in her. Guilt and sorrow overwhelmed her, had she cried this hard for her sister? had she suffered this much? The answer was simple, no. Even after all that, she was still hopeful. She had been hopeful of goodness of this world because of the people that had saved her. She still remember the soothing caresses of Mor, the welcoming arms of the priestesses, the light brown eyes full of fury and protectiveness that had first saved her. Fuck.

----

The work in the library had distracted her, at least hearing Merrill tell her she was useless was better than hearing it in her head. She was kneeling on the floor looking for a book when she heard quick and loud steps approaching her. "GWYN! GWYNETH BERDARA!" Nesta. She looked for ways to escape, she was not ready to face her. No one for that matter. She probably was going to beat her up for hurting her sister. Shit shit shit, she said trying to hide behind a cart. Nesta's boots appeared in front of her, "are you kidding me? this is where you are?" Nesta said loudly. Gwyn did not respond. "oh no, no silent treatment. Come on, get up and face me" She grabbed her hand softly and pulled her up. "why aren't you in training?, you never miss"

"Nesta... I don't think this is the right time" She whispered

"Right time my ass" Nesta said crossing her arms. She inhaled, feeling a pressure on her chest and tears threatening to come.

"please... i don't want to hear it"

Nesta looked at her eyes, and her looked changed from upset to.... worried. "wait, Gwyn, whats going on? why.... Is this about what happened yesterday?"

She nodded.

Nesta stood quiet for a couple of minutes, as if expecting her to talk. She gave in, "it was not my intention to hurt Elain, i did not know about the necklace".

Nesta looked shocked "you think i am mad at you about Elain?" Gwyn nodded. "No Gwyn, you are also my sister, neither you or Elain are at fault here"Gwyn felt tears sliding down her cheeks, and warm long arms surrounding her. "I would never be mad at you. Mother I've been looking everywhere for you since last night; Clotho told us you did not feel well and that's why i didn't come last night".

She looked up at her sister " y...you came?" she asked. "of course i would come! Why would i leave you alone to suffer? i was so worried" Nesta hugged her tighter, and Gwyn cried harder.

They stood there, hugging each other for a while until Nesta pulled apart. "Okay, please, talk to me. I only arrived after Elain began throwing a fit; hell, everyone heard it"

Gwyn smiled a little, breathed and began telling what had happened.

-----

Nesta was sitting next to her by the time she had finished. Gwyn looked at the floor while confessing the last part of the story, "i am in love with him. I don't know when it happened, or how; but there is no one i would want to give myself to than him" she said, "and i know it's unfair for Elain, and for Az as well, but i can't help it. I feel something that tugs at me every-time i see him. I want to be near him, all the time". Warm tears in her cheeks her and she covered her face with her hands while saying "i am so selfish, i want him to choose me, i want you to choose me. I am so tired of being alone...."

Nesta grabbed her hand and made her look at her eyes, "Gwyn, i want you to listen to me very closely; you are my friend, my chosen sister and the person i trust the most", "i want you to trust me, to talk to me about everything".

Gwyn smiled softly. "Nesta... don't say it just because im crying...."

She interrupted her, "Gwyn, i am here because i love you; you are such an amazing person, you pulled me out of my darkness and gave me purpose" Nesta said. "all we have experienced, all we have accomplished; and you don't realize the light you bring with your smile","Gwyn you are the stars amongst a dark night; you are the light that guides us outside of the darkness".

Light

Purpose

Love

Nesta loved her, she had chosen her to be her friend; even with all the flaws Gwyn had, Nesta had stood by her. And above all, she had helped Nesta become that amazing woman she was.

She hugged her sister even harder, feeling the warmth and the love pouring from both of them; "thank you".

Nesta didn't know it. But those words had also pulled Gwyn out of the dark pit, they had brought back the essence of Gwyn’s character: Nesta had brought her hope back.

PART 2

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valkyrie

[capituloperdido1]

Hello dark academia lovers! I’m starting a new series on my instagram about writing tips from the masters and I picked the queen Virginia! If you’d like to see more of this, please check my instagram here: @labohemejulia. Thank you :)

[capituloperdido1]

Hey guys! As a writer myself, it’s hard to have a lot of resources for writing in one place. That’s why I decided to create this masterpost, and maybe make more if I find future resources. I hope you like it, and expect to see more masterposts like this in the future!

Generators

Character

Appearance Generator

Archetypes Generator

Character Generator

Character Traits Generator

Family Generator

Job/Occupation Generator, (II)

Love Interest Generator

Motive Generator

Name Generator

Personality Generator, (II)

Quick Character Generator

Super Powers Generator

Names

Brand Name Generator

Medicine Title Generator

Name Generator

Quick Name Generator

Vehicle Generator

Town Name Generator

Plot

First Encounter Generator

First Line Generator, (II)

Plot Generator, (II), (III)

Plot Device Generator

Plot Twist Generator

Quick Plot Generator

Setting/World-Building

City Generator

Fantasy Race Generator

Laws Generator

Pet Generator

Setting Generator

Species Generator

Terrain Generator

Prompts

Subject Generator

”Take Three Nouns” Generator

Word Prompt Generator

Misc

Color Generator

Decision Generator

Dialogue Generator

Journey Generator

Title Generator, (II), (III)

Some Tips

Just a few I found from the writing tips tag!

Writing action / @berrybird

How to create a strong voice in your writing / @collegerefs

How to plot a complex novel in one day! / @lizard-is-writing

8 ways to get past writer’s block / @kiramartinauthor

psa for writers / @dasakuryo

”Write Using Your 5 Senses” / @ambientwriting

How People Watching Improves Your Writing / @wherethetransthingsare

Writing Science Fiction: Tips for Beginners / @fictionwritingtips

Creating Likeable Characters / @authors-haven

Vocabulary

Descriptive words / @somekindofstudent

Words to replace “Said” / @msocasey

Obscure color words / @mintsteelpeachlilac

Words to spice up your stories / @busyibee

Words to describe someone’s voice

Words to Use Instead of Very / @gaybybirth

Touchy Feely Words / @gaybybirth

Some Advice

Stephen King’s Top 20 Rules for Writers

”But my plot isn’t UNIQUE or BIG enough!” / @youreallwrite

8 Things Every Creative Should Know / @adamjk

(How To) Get Over Comparing Yourself to Other Creatives / @adamjk

How to Get Over Common Creative Fears (Maybe) / @adamjk

14 Tips From Stephen King On Writing / @i-can-give-you-prompts

Playlists

Electronic Thoughts / @eruditekid

“Mix About Writing” An Instrumental Mix / @shadowofemirates

Shut Up, I’m Writing! / @ninadropdead

Chill / @endlessreveries

Breathtaking Film Scores / @tweedskirts

Music to Write to Vol. 1: Starlight / @crestadeen

Music for Written Words / @ghoulpatch

Dead Men Tell No Tales / @scamandersnewt

Fatale / @dolcegf

All These Things that I’ve Done / @referenceforwriters

Feeling Soaking into Your Bones / @verylondon

I Can Feel Your Pulse in the Pages / @rphelper

Morally Ambiguous / @scamandersnewt

Wonderwall / @wheelerwrites

Pythia / @mazikeene

Ballet: To Dance / @tanaquil

Websites and Apps

For Writing

ZenPen: A minimalist writing website to keep you free of distractions and in the flow.

The Most Dangerous Writing App: A website where you have to keep typing or all of your writing will be lost. It helps you keep writing…kind of. You can choose between a time or word count limit!

Evernote: An online website where you can take notes and save the product to your laptop and/or smartphone!

Writer, the Internet Typewriter: It’s just you and your writing, and you can save your product on the website if you create an account.

Wordcounter: A website to help check your word and character count, and shows words you’re using frequently.

Monospace: An Android app for writing on the go when you feel the inspiration, but you don’t have your laptop on you!

For Productivity

Tide: An app that combines a pomodoro-esque timer with nature sounds and other noises! (Google Play / Apple Store)

ClearFocus: An Android app with a pomodoro-type time counter to let you concentrate easier and stay productive.

Forest: An app with a time counter to keep you focused and off your phone, and when you complete the time limit, a tree grows in your garden! (Google Play / Apple Store)

SelfControl: A Mac downloadable app that blocks you from distracting mail servers, websites, and other things!

Prompt Blogs

@writeworld

@dialouge-prompts

@oopsprompts

@prompts-for-the-otp

@creativepromptsforwriting

@the-modern-typewriter

@theprofessionalpromptmaker

@writers-are-writers

@otp-imagines-cult

@witterprompts

@havetobememes

@auideas

@putthepromptsonpaper

@promptsonpaper

@fyotpprompts

@otpisms

@soprompt

@otpprompts

@ablockforwritersblock

@awritersnook

Writing Tips Blogs

@writeworld

@anomalously-written

@awritersnook

@clevergirlhelps

@referenceforwriters

@whataboutwriting

@thewritershelpers

@nimblesnotebook

@slitheringink

[capituloperdido1]

here is a thread of black gofundme’s that have still not reached their goals