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“But never have I been a calm blue sea. I have always been a storm.”
— Stevie Nicks, “Storms,” Tusk
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i love saying fuck me because it can either be sexual or self-loathing and those are two things that describe me perfectly
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“WHY AM I GETTING TURNED ON BY THAT”
— me every single time (via suspend)
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i wonder what version of me exists in your mind
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What if spent the next few years just floating in some atmosphere...
As I've gotten older, I've realized that i have a pattern. Its a pattern of self destruction. I get drunk every single night and although I've gotten my drug problem under control, i see my addictive depressed traits poking its face out in other ways. Nothing makes me happy. Id kill to have passion again. In. Any. Way. Im on a steady plateau of nothingness. Nothing amuses me, nothing truly makes me happy. Im almost 28 years old and honestly i have no excuse anymore for my "partying" ways. My rent is paid, car is paid off, ive worked the corporate job for the better half of my legal life, ive had plenty of beautiful women who only wanted to better me. But im here, an almost 28 year old person and nothing feels good anymore...
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