bestbakingbitty

[bestbakingbitty]

shitty: (picks up phone) Jacques L’Sexymann. how’s it going  jack: (voice cracking) i haven’t seen bitty since the album came out jack: please do you know where he is shitty: ah shitty: fuck… shitty:… shitty: ……….LARDS

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okay okay hear me out….

jack and bitty playing “my boyfriend sucks at celebrity trivia” like jenna marbles does on her channel……

oh my fucking god this is the best headcanon ive ever had

bitty: now y’all gotta be nice in the comments, jack spent his formative years pretty much exclusively in a hockey rink.

jack: this is the worst idea.

bitty: it’ll be fine!

TEN MINUTES LATER

bitty, slumped halfway down in his chair, playing the Titanic theme and staring at jack in abject horror: jack. jack oh my god. jack, staring right back at him blankly: i have…no idea what this is.

bitty: okay, fine, let’s try this one. *plays two seconds of the next theme song* jack, instantly: Breaking Bad.

bitty: oh for god’s SAKE

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tango: wow, you guys are so close! you must have been best friends for like ten years? did you meet in middle school?

wicks: uhh, no. we met on our first day here in freshman year

bitty: i- really?

ollie: you literally introduced us to each other!

[bestbakingbitty]

Honestly the thing that is most unbelievable to me about the Check Please universe is that we’re supposed to just accept that self-proclaimed TV connoisseur Adam “Holster” Birkholtz saw the iconic moment in season 7 of Parks & Rec (early 2015, btw) when Ben Wyatt gets drunk and describes wife Leslie Knope as his “sexy roommate and we love each other” and that did not cause a lightbulb in his head to go off like, “hey!! I have one of those, too, but we’re not— oh.” Like, come on. Grow up.

[bestbakingbitty]

derek “always burns his toast” nurse and william “whip up a quick three course meal” poindexter

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nursey: its cheaper to share the rent poindexter nursey: dex its cheaper if we keep the heat off and just snuggle for warmth nursey: william, why are you buying shirts? it would be cheaper if u borrow one of mine nursey: why would we buy two beds its cheaper to just buy one. will. i have a bed right here

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So, I know we’re all in mourning but do you imagine how WILD it must be for the new group of Frogs to have JUST missed all that. Like some kid from the Midwest shows up and finds out that last year’s captain made national history, is engaged to the lead scorer and assistant captain of the Falcs THE Jack Zimmermann, and apparently has a book deal that sometimes may involve him showing up with half the Falcs staff to make JAM. 

[bestbakingbitty]

we dont talk about the year 2 zimbits era enough… the flirting without realizing it’s flirting (””””chirping””””)…. the pining…. becoming best friends….. hair tousling & roughhousing….. coffee at annie’s… checking practice… taking  a wgss/history food class together…. bitty knowing he’s falling in love, thinking jack is straight, falling anyway….. jack not investigating his feelings enough to know he has feelings for bitty but still being a huge dork in love…. jumping over a snowbank to ask him for coffee… showing bitty all his photography…… buying him a fucking oven��… them going out on the reading room to talk when they can’t sleep….. bro i’m fucking misting up

[bestbakingbitty]

after samwell, jack barely sees shitty because they’re both so busy. he misses him so much that he gets a turtle and names him shitty

Does a turtle really encapsulate Shitty’s energy?

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10 years into his NHL career, PR finally convinces Jack to make a Twitter and absolutely no one was prepared for how good he’d be at it (Bitty takes all the credit)

__

Based off of these tweets by Tony Hawk which gave me BIG Jack Zimmermann vibes…so this was born-

[bestbakingbitty]

I like to think that Jack is so 110% that he can somewhat tell how Bitty is feeling based on the way his food tastes.

-Jack eating his sandwich with Marty, Thirdy or Tater (really anyone that is aware of Jack and Bitty)

Jack takes one bite, makes a contemplative face, puts down the sandwhich, takes out his phone and steps into the hallway. He returns 15 mintues later and continues eating as if nothing of significance occured.

“What was that about?”

“ Something was bothering Bittle so I just wanted to make sure he was ok.”

They ponder a moment for it seems whatever the issue, it has been resovled and prying isn’t a good way to talk to Jack. So they drop it and continued with their lunch.

This happens every so often and they start to wonder how suddenly in the middle of the day, Jack claims that something is “bothering” Bitty? One day someone decides to finally ask.

“If somthing is bothering Bitty why do you wait til you eat half your food before you call him?”

“I’m not always completely sure if he’s upset unless i talk to him directly or at least eat his food.”

“His food? Like what, it tastes bad?”

“No its still delicious, but different somehow. So i just call to check up. Usually its stress from school, so we talk through it and discuss how its going.”

“But how can you taste something like that?”

And Jack Laurent Zimmermann, as if someone casually asked 1+1? His response accompanied with the slightest shrug:

“He’s my boyfriend.”

Like what a silly question to ask?

Multiple sighs are released and heads hang low. Food is put down as eyes stare blankly at the ceiling. Some even have to leave, overwhelmed by Jack’s insane sincerity.

After practice Jack notices quite a few guys on their phones. Not meaning to, Jack passes and overhears variations of “Wondering how your day has been” And “Just thinking about you so I wanted to call and say hi.”

He doesn’t think much of it, (since it oblviously has nothing to do with him), and heads home.

[bestbakingbitty]

Art request- Alicia and Bob!

they’re such a power couple

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AU where Jack comes out when a reporter asks him mid-playoffs if he’s dating some actress and he scratches his playoff scruff and says “I try to have only one beard at a time.”

[bestbakingbitty]

JACK: [watching that frog keel over in practice AGAIN] I don’t deserve this

JACK: [storming over to the shower to stop Bittle singing AGAIN at SEVEN AM] I don’t deserve this

JACK: [trying not to look at Bittle’s Spring C short-shorts] I don’t deserve this

JACK: [meeting Bitty’s eyes over breakfast in Madison, trying not to blush when he smiles back] I don’t deserve this

JACK: [surrounded by people who love and support him, wrapping an arm around his boyfriend’s shoulders as he explains the difference between jams and preserves] I deserve this.

[bestbakingbitty]

a compilation of some good things

[bestbakingbitty]

As far as unexpected character reveals go, I’m still SUPER into “overbearing hockey dad with impossibly high expectations, Bad Bob Zimmermann” turning out to be largely an invention of Jack’s anxiety, when actual Bob’s main dad moments turned out to be: -nice goal, short kid! I’m also silently enjoying your mother’s massive middle school crush on me!!!! -Hey, Jack, bud, have you noticed you’re in love with that boy? Maybe you should go kiss him on the face, eh? We can wait!

[bestbakingbitty]

stupid ass check please conspiracy thread