ask-asexual-crystal-gems

[ask-asexual-crystal-gems]

I saw 3 different TERFs on Instagram lauding Trump for ‘protecting women from da men dressing as women.’

Legit, this might’ve been a significant portion of his 2% increase in votes up to the ‘victorious’ 27% of eligible voters from the first term, along with pro-life women.

Voter turnout, despite all the begging, was still abysmal.

I don’t know how to fix this but we need to be canvassing harder IRL or SOMETHING.

We can’t be losing ground to idiots who somehow bewitch Latino men and white women into voting against their own self-interest.

not to be inclusionist on main but i find it shocking and frankly a little horrifying how easily the online LGBTQ community has turned on itself in the past 2 years. like, i need you all to know: i’m not old. i’m 23. so that leaves about a bit less than a decade of me knowing i’m gay, and a bit less than that of me learning about my new family and friends and lifestyle and such, as well as a bit less for actively campaigning/being deeply involved in civil rights and social justice issues.

like, i don’t know if yall realize this if youre newer here but: this whole “asexuality exclusion” thing and this “queer is a slur” thing? this is new. this is only within the past two or so years that its gained any real momentum, the same with terfs and radfems. it wasn’t a concept. there were massive, massive rallies in support of our asexual community. it’s horrifying to me how simply and neatly we as a group have gone from “The A doesn’t stand for Ally” to “There is no A at all”.

and i need you all to know: this is not a coincidence that TERFS have risen up in roughly the same time period. i need you all to realize that when you talk about your exclusion of asexuals from our community, you are parroting well-known TERF and neo-nazi rhetoric.

“they are invading [LGBT/women’s/white] safe spaces to steal our resources and oppress us.”

“they’re only pretending to be [gay/a woman].”

“[asexual/trans women/POC] aren’t REALLY [LGBT/women/human].”

and it goes deeper, fundamentally flawed: when you try to reason that asexuality isn’t inherently LGBT, but if you are otherwise LGBT but asexual it’s somehow fine and different but otherwise youre cishet…all you’re saying is that “you’re only allowed in this club if you don’t support others who are like you. you’re only allowed in this club because i as an authority say you fit nicely under a label that i agree with.”

it’s terrifying, to me, and i’m not asexual. it’s terrifying that this manufactured divide using literal talking points created by and stolen from TERFs and neo-nazis has such an appeal to so many LGBT people. i’m worried for our future on so many levels; climate change, political upheaval, the list goes on. standing strong together is so important right now, perhaps more than ever, at least in my lifetime. and yet we are so destructively focused on ideas of ‘the model of social justice’ and ‘purity culture’ and ‘respectability politics’ and so on that we would rather turn on our own–not even our allies but our own community–because we don’t think they’re LGBT enough.

we spent so long saying “my sexuality isn’t a choice” and arguing “why would i choose to be oppressed for my sexuality” and yet…here we are.

[ask-asexual-crystal-gems]

As a brown trans boy it sucked so badly to watch those “gender envy” slides on tik tok and see only white boys with fluffy hair. It was a little thing but it made me feel invisible even in my own community. So these are men that look like me and give me gender envy. If you’re POC disabled/ don’t see your self in common trans discussions feel free to add on.

[ask-asexual-crystal-gems]

“Yeah I’m aromantic and aplatonic, I got this thing on lock”

Most immortals become the angsty “everyone I have ever loved is gone” kind of immortal. You, on the other hand, instead took it upon yourself to be a loving presence to entire generations of your chosen family, because they are descended from someone you once loved long ago.

[ask-asexual-crystal-gems]

“obviously not ship art” You say that like platonic shipping isn’t a thing.

Stop putting them against eachother 😭😭 THEY ARE LITERALLY BEST FRIENDS

- (obviously NOT ship art)

[ask-asexual-crystal-gems]

Well the ‘as an agender person I am tired of the godawful level of hairsplitting in gender discourse’ post was better received than expected.

Gender and language are social constructs.

I heard that someone insisted “effeminate” and “femme” were entirely different things and I’m just like ……. ugh. If someone else uses them interchangeably it is not your place to dictate what’s ‘right’ to say or not.

Don’t become a mini-militant over STUPID INCONSEQUENTIAL things.

Go spend your energy out in the real world on gender essentialists or learning/educating about legislation. You using other people who largely agree with you as a punching bag is NOT CUTE.

[ask-asexual-crystal-gems]

QPR goals

For the past year and a half, my friend and I have been using the same 2 plastic lined gift bags back and forth. I give him a gift in the bag, then later he gives me another gift in the same bag. It’s a fun gesture between us, and I just realized how accidentally sustainable it is

[ask-asexual-crystal-gems]

Genuine question: why do people DM and then block? This is so incredibly rude and anti-open-discourse.

What’s the aim?

If you wanted to look like an asshole, then mission accomplished?

If you wanted to appear kneejerk, close-minded, and instantly judgmental, then mission accomplished?

If I were the type to make blacklists, or blogs dedicated to cataloguing this stuff, I would put these folks on the “Anti Open Discourse” list.

[ask-asexual-crystal-gems]

Me, a neurodivergent probably-aplatonic person: no the f%#& we don’t, Karen.

[ask-asexual-crystal-gems]

Poke the Bear: Silencing of Trans Masc Voices and Why it Matters in Relation to Patriarchy

I've made a previous post about my experience being a disabled trans man of color. As you can see from my profile pics I present masculinely. I occasionally paint my nails white, black, or navy.

I'd consider myself someone who is balanced. Despite everything, I am a whole and beautiful person. Flaws and all. I know my darkness as well as I know my light.

And I know humanity, just the same.

So, I know why this is happening.

Humanity doesn't want to grow up. Different people don't want to grow up. What do I mean by that?

They don't want to accept the complexity and multi-dimensional nature of reality. They don't want to accept people as they are -- they just want people to be what they think they should be. They're not really interested in the happiness and freedom of others.. no. Just their own.

How could I say such a thing?

Because they're decrying some of the most oppressed minorities on the planet. These minorities hold the key to ending this cycle of ignorance and hate.

That's all there is to it. Trans men, trans women, intersex people, and every form of outcast that you can think of? Yeah. We all have something to teach society. Society has things they could learn from us. If it wasn't so dead set on killing, ridiculing, silencing, etc the people who could help them see a way out of the darkness.

Am I making this seem grandiose? It's not. Every one of us has something we could possibly contribute - especially if we had the resources and support available to us.

Why else would you want to take those things away from any group of people?

Because you're scared of what they represent and what they can do.

I'm black. I'm white. I'm Greek. I'm other races I'm not sure of. I have a pussy. I'm a man. I love women. I like men. I'm autistic, I have cPTSD. I have low iron. I'm something most akin to a Buddhist. I know science and spirituality both have a role to play in helping humanity out of this stage in evolution.

So .. yeah. I know why you're scared. I am, too. Because I'm probably one of the most fit for this "role" and I very much do not want to be.

Especially considering how people have been thusfar.

[ask-asexual-crystal-gems]

semi-sane centrist or conservative: Why does the left make such a big deal about gender anyway? Why can’t we just all be ‘people’?

Me: My brother in Christ you are probably agender.

[ask-asexual-crystal-gems]

How amatonormativity causes people to think about QPRs:

(hierarchical)

-romo

-qpr

-friendship

How people in the know think about qprs:

-qpr-romo

(and-other-relationships-mishmash-and-sometimes-qpr-is-conceptualized-as-a-form-of-friendship-or-rather-what-friendship-SHOULD-be)

-friendships

-society’s shitty conception of what friendship is and how to value it

if i see someone define queerplatonic relationship as "between romance and friendship" one more time i'm exploding this planet

[ask-asexual-crystal-gems]

The most succinct summary of a sensual aplatonic spec person:

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Animals Memes (@animals.hilarious)

[ask-asexual-crystal-gems]

I appreciate the gesture but (oops here’s another spicy take) the overall point is I think (1) normalizing or endorsing surgeries in all but the most desperate situations is not a very good idea. I don’t experience strong dysphoria, and my mental health is not especially endangered by it, therefore taking on physical risks up to and including death is not within my personal aims nor my beliefs for the direction of humanity at large.

(2) There are also many individuals in the VoidPunk umbrella whose ideal forms are not human or not even physical at all. Therefore this reasoning applies to those types of ‘dysphoria’ (may have a different name idk) no matter what surgeries did and didn’t exist. I didn’t think of that ideal myself but lately I’m starting to agree with it, too. Makes a lot of sense for asexuals who experience ‘mirror shock.’

Oh and concerning (1) also, it seems that binary trans people who experience strong dysphoria lean towards endorsing any and all surgeries, which I’m skeptical of. And the general culture of lgbt is following suit. I’m not proposing top-down gatekeeping like transmeds do ofc, just talking about social interactions and decision-making. Like, giving unquestioned approval of someone who’s considering it or responding ‘yay’ to a social media post about getting a low-stakes surgery who’s stated it is such. (if they haven’t indicated personal info such as level of dysphoria, are keeping it to themselves, best to remain agnostic on it)

(Removing nipples would also be a huge leap that I don’t think current society would be ready for. If you wanted to endure a bunch /more/ interrogation or weird looks et al then go for it ig. It wouldn’t be like current passing or presenting. They’d at best assume it was from cancer, I guess.)

The thing is, (3) body positivity is about gradually developing the awareness to interrogate bad thoughts we have about our body and not taking them as gospel truth, and that conversation is healthy and sprouting among fat or obese people, people who don’t fit beauty standards, but suddenly hits a wall when the notion of gender is inserted. Which is particularly baffling to an agender person ig, because we’re on the outside looking in.

*Alloromantics talking about romance

Me, an aro: god make it stop

*Allosexuals talking about sex

Me, an ace spec repulsed person: god shut upppppp

*Gendered people discoursing enndddlesssly about gender which is so abstract

Me, agender: why. Just why.

(which is far more common in the ace community)

(I was gonna wait to post this until we found out whether Trump was thwarted in the election, but @galaxy--ace put out a call for spicy takes, and mentioned something very similar, so I guess here we go…)

*conventionally trans people waxing poetic about their ideal body and bemoaning the one they have

Me, agender: My ideal form is genital-less and maybe not even physical. I can’t transition to that. Oh, you can transition but are still complaining and not contemplating body positivity or body neutrality? Hm. I’m sure the people or teens you’re mentoring and those you’re socially influencing will benefit from that discourse omission.

*alloplatonic people talking about friendships

Me, an aplatonic(?): Yes. Yes that right there. Good shit. Keep going. More! Morrrre!!!! I have so much vicarious fun watching you do something despite the fact I don’t much seem to be interested in such.

*goes back to watching shows about various careers and stuff I’d never do

*returns

Wholesome! Nom nom! Feed me!

[ask-asexual-crystal-gems]

I'm always so curious about this stuff so: everyone drop ur controversial opinions about aspec stuff/attraction/relationships/etc. below. (Nothing hateful!)

My personal controversial opinion is that we should focus less on being seen as a part of the LGBT+ community (most queer people see us as a part of that anyway, and it's not really achieving anything concrete that I've seen) and focus more on visibility within the general population. Most people think asexual = aroace, and they have no idea what any other label means. Which is a huge issue!

[ask-asexual-crystal-gems]

*Alloromantics talking about romance

Me, an aro: god make it stop

*Allosexuals talking about sex

Me, an ace spec repulsed person: god shut upppppp

*Gendered people discoursing enndddlesssly about gender which is so abstract

Me, agender: why. Just why.

(which is far more common in the ace community)

(I was gonna wait to post this until we found out whether Trump was thwarted in the election, but @galaxy--ace put out a call for spicy takes, and mentioned something very similar, so I guess here we go…)

*conventionally trans people waxing poetic about their ideal body and bemoaning the one they have

Me, agender: My ideal form is genital-less and maybe not even physical. I can’t transition to that. Oh, you can transition but are still complaining and not contemplating body positivity or body neutrality? Hm. I’m sure the people or teens you’re mentoring and those you’re socially influencing will benefit from that discourse omission.

*alloplatonic people talking about friendships

Me, an aplatonic(?): Yes. Yes that right there. Good shit. Keep going. More! Morrrre!!!! I have so much vicarious fun watching you do something despite the fact I don’t much seem to be interested in such.

*goes back to watching shows about various careers and stuff I’d never do

*returns

Wholesome! Nom nom! Feed me!

[ask-asexual-crystal-gems]

Short 2-sentence post about an issue

[ask-asexual-crystal-gems]

When the neurotypicals insist you’re ‘an asshole’ but all that’s happening is you refusing to recognize a certain social norm and them assuming the social norm is a moral standard