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aries-writings · 2 years ago

Note

ayo mf, can i request something from your prompt list with sunghoon, the plot being number 10 and from the dialogue, the numbers 1 & 10~ fanks miss ching��😻

drunk-dazed | p. sunghoon

plot prompt #10: and i try to refrain, but you’re stuck in my brain.

dialogue prompts #1 + #10: “i just wanna feel your lips against my skin.” + “could we pretend that we’re in love?”

pairing: sunghoon x fem!reader

genres: angst, fluff, second chance love

word count: 2.7k

warnings: alcohol use, light swearing, light violence, some blood, emo sunghoon, a heated makeout but nothing too bad, and i think thats it??

a/n: this is a repost from my main blog! if you’ve read this or seen it before, i had this posted on @dandelion-aj before revising and reposting it here!

see the full list of prompts here

It was a kind of routine at this point. An endless cycle Sunghoon had fallen into. It always started at home in his apartment. He’d be sitting on the couch watching a random show he’d found. Or in his bed trying to catch up on some much-needed sleep. Or in the kitchen attempting to cook. All things he had done plenty of times before. The only difference is that now you weren’t there with him.

You and Sunghoon had broken up nearly 10 months ago, but it felt like far longer than that to him.

The apartment the two of you shared was so much quieter after you left. The hallways that used to echo with your laugh were now filled with a deafening silence that served only as a reminder of your absence.

He’d tell himself it was fine. That everything was okay. After all, it was a mutual breakup. But the more Sunghoon thought about it, the more he’d second guess the decision.

And that would lead to phase two of this dreadful cycle: missing you.

Sunghoon missed you to no end. He realized that now. What exactly he missed about you, he couldn’t quite put his finger on. Maybe it was the way your hand felt in his. Or the sound of your raspy morning voice. Or the way his name rolled off your tongue. Or, maybe, he just missed you.

Right now, in this very moment, Sunghoon missed you, and that confused him. How can he miss someone that’s standing right in front of him?

“Hey,” you shouted. The sound of your voice pulled him out of his thoughts. He shook his head as he was now suddenly hyper-aware of his surroundings. The flashing lights. The booming music. The blur of people dancing around him. The cold cup in his hand. “Are you okay?”

Sunghoon sighed. “Yeah, I’m fine.”

Phase three of that damn cycle: drinking away any memory of you. He’d knock back shot after shot in hopes that he’ll forget who you are. But instead, he forgets who he is, and all he can think about is you. Funny how that works. No matter how hard he tried to force you out of his mind, you’d always come right back.

Everything he saw reminded him of you. He’d hear your voice in all the white noise. He’d see you in every face around him. As a matter of fact, he was 97% sure it wasn’t even you that he was talking to.

“You sure?” You quirked an eyebrow up. “You don’t look too good.”

“I’m okay.” He looked up at you, or some girl who looked a lot like you at least.

Alcohol has its downsides. Like how it filled him with this indescribable ache for you. But it also has its upsides, because god knows he wouldn’t have done this if he were sober.

Without a second’s hesitation, Sunghoon pulled your doppelgänger in and latched his lips to hers, dropping the half-full cup to the floor. His eyes fluttered shut as he let himself fully believe it was your lips he was tasting. His mouth began to move feverishly against yours, devouring every inch he could reach.

He pulled away and his eyes met yours as he caught his breath. He couldn’t tell if it was the alcohol, but for a fleeting moment, that ache was relieved. His hand gripped the back of your neck and pulled you in for another kiss.

His fingers tangled into your hair and tugged your head back, giving him better access to your lips. The kiss escalated with every passing second. The way your tongues danced. The way you were gripping each other’s clothes for dear life. It eased that burning in his chest.

That is until he felt a hand land on his shoulder. Before Sunghoon could comprehend what was happening, he was pushed back as a hard fist slammed into his face. The force of the punch sent him back into a group of people. People that were far too intrigued by the sudden violence to care about being shoved.

Sunghoon’s hand flew up to his nose as soon as he felt the blood begin to flow. He looked up to see a muscular man with his arm slung over a girl’s shoulder. The same girl who looked exactly like you seconds ago.

“You stay the fuck away from her! You hear me?!” the man screamed as he shoved Sunghoon once more.

He tried to catch himself, but lost his balance and stumbled to the ground. He glanced between the couple standing before him. It didn’t take long for him to put two and two together. “I’m sorry.” he muttered.

All eyes were on him. He could see a few people recording the scene and others whispering. Ah yes, phase four: getting too caught up thinking about you that he makes a fool of himself in public.

Sunghoon stood up, looking down at his bloodied palm then back at the couple. “I just- I thought you were- Fuck, I’m sorry.”

He snaked his way through the dense crowd, somehow managing to find the door. Slamming his body weight into it, he felt the cold night air hit his skin, almost tumbling onto the frigid concrete in the process. He threw himself to the ground beside the door and pulled out his phone as he wiped away the remaining blood from his nose.

Alas, the final stage of our cycle: wallowing in self-pity as Sunghoon tries to find a way home.

He scrolled through his contacts in hopes of finding someone who’d be willing to pick him up and give him a ride.

Jungwon.

Jake.

Heeseung.

Jay.

Ni-ki.

Sunoo.

Y/n.

He froze at the sight of your name. ‘Why do I even have your number still?’ he thought. His thumb hovered over your name for a second. 'No, she won’t answer anyway.’ He stared at the call button for a moment, and the next thing he heard was the calling tone of his phone.

His eyes widened, and he rushed to hit the 'end call’ button. His arm dropped down to his side and his head fell back against the shaking wall of the club. He sighed and let his heavy eyelids close. He would have fallen asleep like that if it weren’t for his phone vibrating in his hand. He opened his eyes just enough to read the name on the screen.

Y/n.

He had to read the name a few times, and even then he didn’t believe what he was seeing. He knew it wasn’t in his best interest, but he answered. He put the phone to his ear and waited.

“Sunghoon?”

He shivered at the sound of your voice. God, he hadn’t heard it in so long.

“Y/n?” His voice came out a lot shakier and weaker than he had intended.

“Did you call?”

“Uhh, yeah. Yeah, I did.” He looked down at his lap, nervously fiddling with the hem of his shirt. “On accident,” he added. “It was an accident. I meant to call Sunoo. My bad. Sorry for bothering you.”

“No no. It’s fine.” There was an awkward silence for a moment before you spoke again. “Okay, well, if you meant to call Sunoo, I’ll let you go now.”

'No.’ a voice pleaded from the back of his mind. 'Don’t hang up. I missed you. I missed your voice.’

“Wait!” Sunghoon called out, earning a few looks from people walking by. “Wait. I, uh,” He let out a shameful sigh. “I need a ride.”

“A ride?”

“Yeah. I don’t want to call the guys because they said if I ever got drunk again, they won’t be the ones to come get me. That if I ever put myself in this situation I need to find a way out-”

“Wait you’re drunk?!” you interrupted.

Sunghoon gulped. He must sound like an idiot. “Yeah.”

“Text me the address. I’m on my way.”

“Hey,” you whispered as you nudged the sleeping man’s shoulder. “Sunghoon.”

“Mmmm.” Sunghoon groaned.

You playfully rolled your eyes and stood. “Fine then. Guess I’ll just leave you here if you’re enjoying your nap that much-”

Before you could turn away, you felt Sunghoon grab your wrist. You looked at your arm, then back up to him. His eyes were still shut and his head was still pressed to the wall when he spoke in a hoarse voice. “Don’t go.” He opened his eyes, his bloodshot gaze catching yours. “You came.”

“You asked me to.” you responded.

“Yeah, but…” he trailed off. “I didn’t think you’d actually come.”

“Do you know what could happen to a handsome man like you at this time of night?” You pointed at the vibrating club. “Especially at a place like this?”

Sunghoon smirked. “You think I’m handsome?”

You rolled your eyes again. “Shut up and get in the car.”

“You’re not gonna help me?”

“Sunghoon, I can assure you I do not have the strength to carry a drunk, five-foot-ten man right now.”

“Come on, the car is like 7 feet away.”

“That’s far too many feet.”

“Pleeeease.” he pouted.

You huffed and wrapped his arm around your shoulders. You placed your arm around his waist and attempted to hoist him up, but to no avail.

“You know, this is going to require a little effort on your end, too.” you remarked.

“Oh, right, sorry. Okay, on three. One, two, three.”

With your joint effort, you managed to get Sunghoon off the ground. It took him some time to catch his balance, almost pulling you both back down a few times.

“Are you okay?” you asked.

Sunghoon put up a thumbs up in response while he wobbled on his feet.

“Okay, let’s get you to the car.”

It was a bit of a struggle, but you successfully got Sunghoon buckled into the passenger seat. “You better not puke in my car.” You walked over to the driver’s seat and started the car. “How did you end up here anyway.”

Sunghoon stared out the window at the club. “That’s a good question.”

'You. I’m here because of you.’

It was a mostly quiet drive to Sunghoon’s apartment complex. The only sounds heard were the hum of the car’s engine and the soft music playing through the speakers. It seemed like just a few minutes passed by the time you were parked in front of Sunghoon’s apartment building.

You shut off the car and turned to Sunghoon. “Are you going to be okay walking up there by yourself?”

He ran a hand through his hair. “I’ll be fine.”

“Are you sure?”

“Are you asking because you want to come with me?”

“Well, I didn’t know if you wanted me to go with you.”

'I always want you with me.’

“I mean I wouldn’t be opposed to a little company.”

Your lips pulled into a weak smile. You climbed out of the car and met Sunghoon at the door of the apartment lobby. You both walked in hand in hand and he directed you to the elevator.

“Can’t remember the last time I was in this elevator” You thought out loud.

Sunghoon hit the button for floor number three and shoved his hands in his pockets. “This place did used to be your home”

The second Sunghoon got the door to his apartment open, he made a beeline for the couch and threw his body onto it.

You stood awkwardly at the door. “Well, if that’s all you need, I’ll get going now.”

'Don’t let her leave. Who knows when you’ll be able to see her after this. Don’t let her leave.’

“Y/n.”

You were just about to step out into the hallway when he called your name. You looked back at him and you swear you’ve never seen a man look so desperate.

“Stay.” His voice was shaky, almost inaudible. “Even if it’s just for a few minutes. I know I’ve already asked a lot of you but- Just- Please stay.”

“Okay.” You closed the door and made your way back to the couch, taking a seat next to Sunghoon.

You took in his appearance. Not what he was wearing, but his face. His eyes looked sunken in, his nose was swollen, and his cheeks had hollowed in a bit. You had never seen him like this. “Sunghoon, what’s wrong?”

Sunghoon was a bit taken aback by your question. “What?”

“You look terrible.” You hadn’t realized the harshness of your words until you noticed Sunghoon visibly wince.

He rolled his eyes. “Gee, thanks.”

“No, I mean, you look like you’ve been through something.”

“I’m fine.”

'Now, we both know that’s a fucking lie.’

You shook your head. “No, I know you’re not. Look, I know things got kinda weird between us, but I still care about you.”

'Just say it. Tell her.’

“I miss you.” Sunghoon whispered.

You froze, absolutely certain that your ears were playing tricks on you. “What?”

“I miss you.” he repeated. He looked up to meet your gaze. His eyes were brimming with tears. Damn, why did alcohol make him so emotional? “I miss you so much.”

You tilted your head. “No, you don’t.”

“Yes, I do. You have no idea.” With every word, it got harder to keep the tears in. “I miss the songs you’d hum every morning while you made breakfast. I miss your bedhead. I miss the way you’d squint when you were reading something. I miss you, y/n.”

You heard the desperation in his voice, but you told yourself it was just the alcohol. His words now weren’t lining up with what he had said then. “Do you remember why we broke up?”

Sunghoon scoffed, but it sounded more like a sob. “How could I forget? You said you 'lost feelings.’ That you had 'fallen out of love with me.’”

“We both said we had fallen out of love.” you corrected.

“I know, but things are different now.” He placed a hand on your cheek and pressed his forehead to yours. Your lips were mere centimeters apart, and you could feel his shallow breath on your face. “Please, y/n.”

“Sunghoon…” It hurt you to see him like this. “It must be the alcohol talking. You’re not thinking straight. We both said it ourselves. We’re not in love anymore.”

“Then let’s pretend. I don’t care how long it lasts. I just- I need you.” His voice was shaking. “Even if it’s just for tonight, could we pretend that we’re in love?”

You leaned into his palm. You hadn’t been this close to him in so long. You’d be lying if you said you didn’t miss this. Sunghoon’s touch had this warmth to it that you were never quite able to feel in anyone else. It was one of the many reasons you had fallen in love with him in the first place.

You were so deeply in love with him throughout the two years you had been together. That made things harder when you noticed that you two had grown distant. For some indescribable reason, the two of you had slowly begun to grow apart. And during this time, any small thing could spark an argument.

After two months, it just didn’t feel like a relationship anymore. Neither of you knew what you wanted and it seemed like there was always a wall between you, and it didn’t take long to decide that it’d be best for you to go your separate ways.

It’s just like that saying. If you love something, let it go. If it doesn’t come back, you never had it…

“I know what I want now.” Sunghoon stated, sure of himself this time.

“And what is that, Sunghoon?”

“Right now, I just want you here with me.” he answered. “I just want to hold you. I just want to feel your lips against my skin. I just want you.”

… If it comes back…

You place your hand over his and looked deep into his pleading eyes. “I want you too.”

… love it forever.