apathetic-tortoise

[apathetic-tortoise]

Pie, without looking: Oh, Ryan is here

Ryan, walking in: Hey guys

Pah: How could you have possibly known that? Can autistics fucking sense each other??

Pie, who got a Life360 notification: Yes, absolutely we can

[apathetic-tortoise]

IT HAPPENED AGAIN!!!

Pluto (2024)

Not me (2021)

Apparently gay sex is a miracle cure 😂

[apathetic-tortoise]

Kim: Chay’s been trying his best to make me feel better. He gave me this sticker this morning for waking up

Macau: Ew, it’s like you’re dating your teacher

Kim: I know, it’s so hot

[apathetic-tortoise]

Toi Ting: Where’s Joke?

Jack: We broke up

Toi Ting: The fuck you did, I will NOT be a child of divorce

[apathetic-tortoise]

Style: Are you this rude to everyone?!

Fadel: Yes, don’t think you’re special

[apathetic-tortoise]

Black, glaring at Sean: If God doesn't strike him down with lightning then I will with a gun

[apathetic-tortoise]

Fadel: I hate you

Style: Enemies to lovers, slow burn, angst with happy ending, 300k+ words

[apathetic-tortoise]

Boeing: Your boyfriend takes ownership of you as if you’re his dog

Sand:

[apathetic-tortoise]

Pah: Okay but why are you helping me?

Ba Mhee: Because my life is a mess right now and I compulsively take care of other people when I don't know how to take care of myself

[apathetic-tortoise]

Style: Fadel! I've been looking for you everywhere!

Fadel: Funny, because I've been avoiding you. Everywhere

[apathetic-tortoise]

Luna: WHY DID YOU KILL HIM?! HE COULD HAVE HAD HOPES AND DREAMS, HE COULD HAVE HAD A FAMILY!!!

Aylin: Luna

Aylin: It- it was just an ant-

[apathetic-tortoise]

Tankhun: Who's your favorite brother?

Kinn: Porchay

Tankhun: Not me?

Kinn: You can't be mad, he's your favorite too

Tankhun: Fair enough

[apathetic-tortoise]

Bunn, on 2 hours of sleep: Here’s a list of suspects I’ve put together so far

Tan, concerned husband: Babe, your name’s on this list

Bunn: I don’t remember where I was last Friday night, Tan. Therefore, I have no alibi. I’ve been tailing myself for the past three days

[apathetic-tortoise]

Pete: I'm going to take a shower, you want to join me?

Vegas: I keep a gun in the drawer next too my bed. If I ever say no to that question I want you to shoot me with it

[apathetic-tortoise]

Style: I can’t believe I’m gonna sleep with him

Kant: Well, you don’t have to

Style: Nah, I’m gonna

[apathetic-tortoise]

Pah: Guess who’s getting his booty blasted at 4 PM today?

Tae, shocked: There has to be a line, Pah! WTF

Pah: No, no, no, no, it’s an exercise class I signed up for: Booty Blast Cross Training

[apathetic-tortoise]

Yok: We all know you’re in love with him

Black: I’m not in love with Gram, shut up

Yok: I never said who

Black: Fuck, okay, hold on, JUST LISTEN—