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[anniyanen]

The highly sensitive [introverted] tend to be philosophical or spiritual in their orientation, rather than materialistic or hedonistic. They dislike small talk. They often describe themselves as creative or intuitive. They dream vividly, and can often recall their dreams the next day. They love music, nature, art, physical beauty. They feel exceptionally strong emotions–sometimes acute bouts of joy, but also sorrow, melancholy, and fear. Highly sensitive people also process information about their environments–both physical and emotional–unusually deeply. They tend to notice subtleties that others miss–another person’s shift in mood, say, or a lightbulb burning a touch too brightly.

 Susan Cain, Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking (via expeditum)

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Passed N2!

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誰から来たんかな〜？🎶

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Took N2 on Sunday

Hopefully I’ll pass

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浜田さかわいすぎ

[anniyanen]

A lot of people ask me what my biggest fear is, or what scares me most. And I know they expect an answer like heights, or closed spaces, or people dressed like animals, but how do I tell them that when I was 17 I took a class called Relationships For Life and I learned that most people fall out of love for the same reasons they fell in it. That their lover’s once endearing stubbornness has now become refusal to compromise and their one track mind is now immaturity and their bad habits that you once adored is now money down the drain. Their spontaneity becomes reckless and irresponsible and their feet up on your dash is no longer sexy, just another distraction in your busy life. Nothing saddens and scares me like the thought that I can become ugly to someone who once thought all the stars were in my eyes.

[anniyanen]

Japanese Photographer Documents The Beauty Of Everyday Life In Japan

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Back to Reality

After a month and a half since coming back from Japan I haven’t really had the time to reflect on my return and my feelings about it. I went to work literally the next week from my return and have been busy ever since, but now I want to talk about coming back from exchange and the reverse-culture shock I went through.

Like I said, I didn’t really have the time to reflect on the fact that the end of my exchange was coming so quickly (the last month of my exchange went by in a blink of an eye, or that’s how it felt like) and coming back to Finland, which never seems to change no matter how long you’re gone. 

My last week in Japan was crazy busy as I had predicted, every day filled with goodbyes and last meetings, but what I did not expect was that on top it all I would get the worst flu in the history of flus... So while frantically running from one place to another I had to live on painkillers to keep my fewer down. It was more than stressful, which was a shame as it was my last week in Japan and all the parties included all-you-can-drink alcohol (笑).

But it was a roller coaster of emotions nevertheless. On my last day all my Japanese (and one Korean :)) friends came to see me off to the station where my bus to the airport left from. Quite surprisingly, although it was around seven in the morning, it felt like any other day hanging out in Umeda. Of course it was heartbreaking to leave these people who had become my family in Japan, but at the same time I was sure we would meet again. 

Even while sitting on the plane, after much running and stress, it felt surreal that I was actually coming back to Finland. To be honest I didn’t realize it until I actually step out to the waiting lobby and saw my dad. 

It was the fastest 9h flight of my life (maybe because free alcohol on board?), but the following days would pass as quickly. I was living in a haze, not quite grasping the fact that I wasn’t in Osaka anymore. I felt lonely, but weirdly satisfied that I didn’t have to talk to anyone for a while. 

Nevertheless I would keep my friends in Japan updated on my life and spam them pictures of Finland. It kept me positively out of context for the first weekend. But at the same time I was ignoring my family and friends with me, as well as the full truth of being back in Finland. I was living in a happy limbo between Finland and Japan, not quite living in either one.

At this point I thought to myself: “Hey, I’m doing pretty good with this whole reverse culture shock thing! It’s not that bad.” But my mistake was exactly that. Later on when my internship started and real life came into the equation, it was like a slap in the face! No more cotton candy fantasies and the easy exchange student life style to run back to, just cold hard reality, which was Finland.

And I don’t mean to bash Finland, although I know I can be quite negative when it comes to my home country (ha). I just wasn’t mentally prepared to come back to my life in Finland and my first reaction was naturally to just hide away and sleep forever. But since I couldn’t do that the next best option was to suck it up and live like a zombie from one day to the next.

This wasn’t entirely too bad of an option, since it helped me keep distracted from everyday reality and thinking too much about it. On the other hand it was quite a different life style from my exchange one, which was tiring. I was constantly tired. This brought my mood down and made me very moody overall. I can’t call it being depressed, but maybe just being a tiny bit anxious all the time. Naturally this affected my relationships around me as well.

This all might sound very dramatic and scary, and at the time it might have been. But to be honest, looking back to my first month back in Finland it really went by in a blink of an eye. Only later I realized that all of this was part of a reverse culture shock that I was going through and realizing that made it a lot easier.

I can’t say I’m still a 100% back to where I started a year ago, and probably never will be, since a year abroad really changes you. But I wouldn’t trade a single moment of it no matter how hard it was coming back. 

I am currently studying to take the JLPT N2 this December and planning my next trip to Japan in the near future (maybe even this year?).

Thank you for those who have read my blog posts during this year.

I shall be back.

Anni

[anniyanen]

All roads lead to...

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Little Thing About Long Distance Relationships

These are just some of my personal thoughts about long distance relationships while being on an exchange :)

Looking back to my year away I obviously missed my loved ones, sometimes so much I wondered if I could really stay in Japan for a whole year.

But let me share some of my thoughts on what I have learned during my exchange, being away from my family, friends and my significant other.

I know for some people being away from their loved ones can seem like the end of the world and I do understand those feelings very well. But what I've noticed in my own relationship is that it's equally as important to have your own life, your own interests and dreams you want to fulfill. Exchange can be the time you actually realize these things about your relationship and yourself. A little space should never be a problem, on the opposite it can make your relationship even stronger.

I happen to be a very independent person and so is my SO. This doesn't mean we don't miss each other or want to be with one another, on the contrary. We respect each other's lives and dreams, which is why leaving for my exchange was so easy. Everyone around us was so worried for us and our relationship, while we didn't see any problem with it. There's so much time ahead of us to spend together in the future and I'm looking forward to it. In a way it feels good to know that there's someone waiting for me when I went back.

Studying in Japan has been a long-time dream of mine, which I needed to experience and I’m glad I did. For now I want to see how far I can go and realize my full potential. The beauty of this is that my partner also feels the same way; we both encourage each other to do better and look forward to seeing each other develop as people. I think this is very important in any relationship, not just when you are on a long distance relationship.

Communication is another important factor in any relationship, especially if you're apart from one another. What makes long distance relationship much easier today is the ease of communication; we have Skype, Facebook, Whatsapp, Line... you name it! Even if we're on the other sides of the world, it's still possible to communicate every day. This has made my exchange a lot easier, since I could chat with my boyfriend and family whenever I want to (Although you have to think of the time differences!).

Another big factor is trust. I cannot emphasize enough on this, since without mutual trust there's no way you'll be able to get through an exchange year. You will meet a lot of new people and so will your SO, but that shouldn't matter if you're in a committed relationship. I was lucky enough to find the most trustworthy guy on this planet ;) and I would have never betrayed his trust.

Of course there's going to be those times when you feel lonely or sad to be apart and really want to see them. Sometimes you might even doubt yourself and your relationship, but let me tell you; that's normal. When you're left with just your own thoughts and can't discuss these things, it's natural to feel lost. That's why communication is so important. Talk about your worries and face your fears. In most cases it's just inside your head.

What I personally loved to do, is send these little packages from time to time with all the things that I thought my loved ones would like, along with a love filled letter. I feel letters and packages are bit more special compared to chatting or Skyping, and it made me feel happy imagining how their faces looked like opening the package :)

Most importantly, I think long distance can also be a good thing for your relationship. Having a little distance and space for each other can do some good for both of you. During this time you'll have more time to think about yourself and what you want in life, what are your dreams outside of the relationship and what makes you happy. You'll also learn to appreciate your family and friends more. The feeling of missing can be a positive power that makes you realize how much you love one another. 

For now it has been almost 12 months since I last saw my family, friends and my boyfriend. Now I am back and everything feels weirdly normal; everything is like it used to be, but I am a new version of myself. Good thing is that the people around me understand that it will take me some time to get used to my old life in Finland, especially my SO. 

If I had to make the choice again I would still choose to go on an exchange, since it has and will be an experience of a life time!

[anniyanen]

最後の花火大会

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Back in Finland

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天神祭の🎆

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卒業！

今日は留学生として関西学院大学から卒業しました！

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ツッコんでー！

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関学前の漫才

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吉本新喜劇♥