amorphous-alien

[amorphous-alien]

disability advocacy went wrong when it became about inspiration porn and “differently abled” and savants. its incredible that that guy with no legs did a triathlon but your sister with no legs will not and she doesnt need prosthetics or five hour training days to deserve respect and compassion and accommodations. its incredible that that autistic guy can look at a city from a helicopter for an hour and then draw the entire detailed skyline from memory when he lands but your autistic friend cannot and they dont need to have a special Autism Power to deserve respect and compassion and accommodations. 

activism framed around “we are just as CAPABLE” means that when people genuinely are less capable they are left behind. activism framed around “we are just as WORTHY” is fundamental to radical compassion.

[amorphous-alien]

I'm taking a sort of music hiatus

My body pain has unfortunately gotten so bad that it has become very difficult to play stringed instruments, including bass. 🫠

Every time I try, I end up getting a shooting pain up my arm, and my wrist and fingers become very stiff and difficult to move. I'm going to try to still practice from time to time, and I'm going to experiment with other instruments like my keyboard. I'll also be practicing my vocals as often as possible, and I'm still going to be writing lyrics with my bandmates.

I appreciate them very much for still including me in the process even though I can't really do as much as I'd like to.

I put a lot of pressure on myself to be consistent with practicing, and when the pain makes it too hard to keep up, it crushes me, and then I feel bad and end up practicing even less. It just becomes this endless cycle where I end up not touching music for ages.

I'm going to do my best to cut myself some slack and just let myself exist for awhile. Play when I feel like I can and like i want to instead of making myself feel like I have to excel.

I'll still try to post bass videos when I have the energy to do so and come up with something I like, but don't expect any consistency 😭

I will be drawing lots soon, though. I can still manage that without any extra pain, thank God.

They think I most likely have EDS and POTS, and I have a rheumatology appointment coming up to try and confirm that and make sure it's nothing else.

Love y'all, see you soon. <3

[amorphous-alien]

Going to be using my Tumblr and Bluesky more now.

I deleted my Twitter already (I don't want the muskrat acknowledging me in any capacity), and I've never trusted meta, but trust them even less now.

I might still use tiktok, but probably a little less than I used to.

Stay safe out there, everyone. And stay alive, please.

We've gotta get through this even if it's the last thing we do.

[amorphous-alien]

Currently hyperfixated on Dandadan.

Consumed by the urge to start making AMVs and fan edits again like I did in circa 2009-2012. 😭 but what if..? 🤔

It's like if my two personalities from my teenage years met and fell in love. 😭 😭

I haven't watched anime or read manga since I was like 19 or something, and I'm obsessed.

[amorphous-alien]

I could get used to this

[amorphous-alien]

save me dandadan,,, dandadan save me,..

[amorphous-alien]

only a couple months late to the side ponytail miku drawing trend 💁‍♀️💙💕

[amorphous-alien]

Finally did a little sketchy redesign of my oc, Llyria. 🥺 👽

Gonna finish the last prize and then try to do a finished piece of Llyria. 💕

[amorphous-alien]

i drew Karlach for yokowalker_art on instagram for winning second place in my DTIYS!

i'm especially happy with how her horns came out. ^-^

[amorphous-alien]

Music Coming!

hey, y'all! just wanted to update you on music plans and post all my links.

i will be posting some short videos of me playing some bass and recommending some small bands on Thursday on my music accounts. :D

i will also be starting a collaboration project with my partner soon. we're just trying to figure out a name so i can make the social media accounts for it. this project will probably end up being mostly various kinds of metal - he likes everything, especially tech-death, and i like most metal as well, especially j-metal/visual-kei and prog. we both enjoy bands like Gojira and Lamb of God. expect lots of screaming and low, heavy tones! maybe some violin thrown in as well, when i can afford to get a violin and learn.

my solo music will be all over the place as my music taste is pretty much everything but country and a few other things, but the things i tend to go back to the most are metal, rock, folk, anything that feels dancey and has good bass, and pop-punk.

MY MUSIC LINKS:

https://www.instagram.com/xxlumithealienxx

[amorphous-alien]

getting back into music

hey, y'all!

i currently have covid, but once i feel better, i'm going to be working hard to get back into music, so here's my music channel!

it'll mostly be shorts of me fiddling on bass and guitar at first, but once my vocals are back to where they used to be, i have some covers and originals planned.

my music taste is all over the place, so there'll be options for everyone to enjoy eventually!

wish me luck

i'll still be making plenty of digital art to post, no stopping that.

also, my content is only gonna get even gayer coming up >:]

also random top surgery update: i'm currently debating if i still want to do it or not. i do really want a flat chest, but i also don't hate my chest as it is anymore - i actually kind of like them now. that being said, the dysphoria still hits me from time to time, and i know if i want something similar to breasts, i can always use prosthetic inserts when i feel like it.

but also, i don't know if i want to deal with recovering from surgery/don't know if i can afford to be out of work for very long while i recover.

i don't know, we'll see.

[amorphous-alien]

[amorphous-alien]

Yello, everyone.

Just wanted to make a post talking about my thoughts about wanting to make dark/weird art again.

I kinda stopped making it out out of shame and fear of both being shadowbanned on everything, and being perceived as "glorifying mental illness."

But here's the thing.

Dark art (and weird art in general) is a very important outlet for me and a lot of other people. It's how I express my feelings towards things like my chronic physical illnesses, and my mental illnesses like schizoaffective disorder and OCD. It helps me cope in a healthy, non-destructive way. It's also, honestly, just fun and interesting for me to make, so sometimes I'll just make it if I feel like I have a fun idea for a concept.

I see a lot of people (including other artists) accuse people who make things like creepy cute or dark art as "glorifying mental illness," or "portraying mental illness negatively/unrealistically" or "trying to trigger people into SH" without even stopping to consider if the artist might just be coping through their art, or just have an interest in dark themes.

I'm going to be very honest.

While I think certain things should definitely have content warnings attached to help prevent accidentally triggering someone actively struggling, I don't think dark art or even vent art should have to be censored or taken offline.

I am, most of the time, against censorship in general (unless it's something completely unforgivable and disgusting, or causing genuine harm through lies/speculation/misinformation). My general rule of thumb is if I disagree with someone, I'll start by criticizing/educating them if I feel they might listen. If I know they won't listen and they said something particularly heinous, however, I will usually report and block.

Finding other people's dark and vent art was very important to me. It let me know I wasn't alone in my struggles, that there were other people going through similar things, and that there were other people just interested in dark themes that weren't bad people.

There's one more important thing I want to talk about.

CW for SH

I have self-harm scars on my legs. Luckily, they healed quite well and honestly mostly just look like stretch marks at this point, but I know a lot of people hate when people depict them or even exist with them.

I'm going to be blunt.

I'm going to probably start drawing them in my depictions of myself/my persona.

I'm just...tired of being shamed for having them. Tired of being told I should cover them. Tired of being told I'm going to make someone hurt themselves by letting them be visible (that's a very traumatizing thing to hear btw, please stop telling people that).

Listen.

I know some people might see them and it might make them depressed or even worse. If seeing them depicted is going to bother you, feel free to unfollow or block me.

But it feels pretty ableist and cruel to say I should have to cover them up and pretend they don't exist.

I'm human. I did it, the scars are here now, and I like to view them as a reminder that I survived and got better.

I'm not trying to encourage other people to SH for them simply existing.

I talk very openly about mental health and encourage people to seek support systems and get help they need in whatever form works best for them. I would never, ever want someone to harm themselves for any reason.

Anyway, my apologies for the long post, I just needed to get this all out of my worm brain.

If I start posting darker stuff and you decide it's not for you, feel free to unfollow, no ill will. I'm still glad you were ever here at all.

I appreciate all of the people who have stuck with me changing accounts throughout the years, you guys rock.

See y'all in my first youtube video in years.

Lumi

[amorphous-alien]

Portrait. Love of 16 years <3

[amorphous-alien]

I have even more ideas but I'm trying to keep the list small 😭

If it's the old oc redesign, it'll be my old punching bag oc.

[amorphous-alien]

I know most of my followers are on tiktok, but I always wanted to host a DTIYS, so I'm just gonna let myself do it regardless of what happens. 🥺

RULES:

☆ put my original art in the post please

☆ tag me in the post, and use the hashtag #lumisdtiys so I can find you!

☆ you can change the pose and get as creative as you'd like, just please keep the character recognizable

☆ no AI

☆ no deadline, but winners to the prizes will be announced on July 20th

Prizes:

1st: one fully rendered bust commission

2nd: one colored sketch bust commission

Have all the fun! ^-^

[amorphous-alien]

Finally decided on her colors 🐰

I love her. Help me name her please. 🥺