alienthoughts

[alienthoughts]

SECONDING THIS OPINION I will always have a massive soft spot for Cosmo Sheldrake and this song is incredible it’s soooo pretty…..

OMFG OTHERKIN AND THERIANS ALL OF YOU PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE GO LISTEN TO SONG OF THE CEDARS BY COSMO SHELDRAKE I HAVE SO MUCH SPECIES EUPHORIA LISTENING TO IT PLEASE I BEG OF YOU GO LISTEN TO IT

[alienthoughts]

Late at night for most…. The days only beginning for some 🧛

Sighhhh I just love drawing my perfect handsome vampire <3

[alienthoughts]

Majestic Angel comes down into a room full of fragile ceramics and immediately accidentally breaks everything by spreading their wings

[alienthoughts]

“Worship”

This Angel is very madly devotedly in love. He calls me his Angel so much… and his companion. Sweetest vampire in the whole wide world

[alienthoughts]

Need kin/nonhuman friends so bad... God I wish I knew any others irl but online ones too.... however most nonhuman spaces tend to be on discord and I haaaaate using it and big servers are just overwhelming

[alienthoughts]

I feel like a lot of people are under the impression that being an angel is all radiant sunshine, tranquil clouds, and majestic wings, but it really isn't.

Being an angel is also...

Struggling with people pleasing

Struggling to consistently think for yourself

A constant struggle between listening to authority and desiring freedom

Being overly trusting or distrusting

An overwhelming desire to be helpful, which can sometimes come off as condescending

Being prone to righteous anger, hatred, grudges, and revenge

Wishing harm upon people who you think have done wrong

Feeling guilty that you wished harm against said people

Frequent moral struggles

A constant fight between "They did wrong and deserve this" and "They're suffering and nobody deserves this"

Feeling extreme shame and self-hatred when you realize that you hurt somebody or have toxic traits

Black and white thinking

A difficulty accepting criticism because it feels like an insult or statement of your worth

Perfectionism

Having an ego or feeling like the pinnacle of morality (even if you factually know you're not)

And so much more

I'm not saying that you can't enjoy angelhood, or that is angels (fallen or not) are always miserable or toxic, but rather that angels, like any other being, are flawed and imperfect. It's not always pretty or sanitized.

[alienthoughts]

space and angels are the same thing

change my mind

[alienthoughts]

Need kin/nonhuman friends so bad... God I wish I knew any others irl but online ones too.... however most nonhuman spaces tend to be on discord and I haaaaate using it and big servers are just overwhelming

[alienthoughts]

im extremely devout but nobody can figure out what im worshipping

[alienthoughts]

Thank you, this is really helpful and really kind of you <3

I want to hear from polykins, or anyone with paratypes or any situation where you experience feeling like multiple things

Maybe it's just because it's new, but I'm finding it a little distressing. Like, for a long time I've just had a connection to angels but was 100% always just an alien. But now I realise sometimes I'm actually more of an angel. Not often, but I have become aware that it happens. This fluidness is what I find distressing, it just makes me feel a bit unstable in my identity.

Maybe this is connected to our DID, I just really latched onto knowing who I am through being Weyoun and adhering to my source to a certain degree. I don't know.

So, anyone who's felt like this before. Advice? How did you get more comfortable in yourself? Is this just a matter of needing time to feel comfortable in my new found identity? Thank you in advance

[alienthoughts]

HUGE discovery about this whole Angel/alien business. It feels like such a blur because for ages I’ve not been separating them at all and was just living as a combination of the two. Now that I’ve recognised my angel identity, I’ve realised why sometimes I feel more alien/ have had dreams about being in a more distinctly alien body. That’s my true alien self without any Angel balancing it out (this also explains for me why I occasionally feel quite animalistic, that undiluted alien self actually is) little drawing below

If you’ve seen how I’ve tended to draw myself, you can probably see how I’ve been blurring the two up until now. Now, I still think physically I’ll feel like that combination quite a bit. They are still very connected in a lot of ways. But this realisation really clears up some of the conflicted feelings I’m having. Yay!

[alienthoughts]

I want to hear from polykins, or anyone with paratypes or any situation where you experience feeling like multiple things

Maybe it's just because it's new, but I'm finding it a little distressing. Like, for a long time I've just had a connection to angels but was 100% always just an alien. But now I realise sometimes I'm actually more of an angel. Not often, but I have become aware that it happens. This fluidness is what I find distressing, it just makes me feel a bit unstable in my identity.

Maybe this is connected to our DID, I just really latched onto knowing who I am through being Weyoun and adhering to my source to a certain degree. I don't know.

So, anyone who's felt like this before. Advice? How did you get more comfortable in yourself? Is this just a matter of needing time to feel comfortable in my new found identity? Thank you in advance

[alienthoughts]

Musings on my angel identity, still struggling to accept it but if there's any positive side to insomnia it's that I had a lot of time to think about this

Truth be told, I haven't quite felt like myself in a while now. Like there was something missing. Something that just wasn't right anymore. My name still feels right, that's who I am. But the life I lived? My memories? Well. They're my past now. That's the best way to feel it. For as long as I've been here, of course technically they've always been my past. But recently that disconnect has just felt like something stronger. That is a life I have lived. It's not a life I live now

I'm still Weyoun, though. And still that particular Weyoun. And still an alien. It's not my current life but it's very important to me. When I first formed it was.... rocky. I mean, I'd suddenly found myself in a different time on earth far from my one purpose. The only thing I'd ever known. The only memories I had revolved around Gods that I no longer served. And then, after I had come to understand how all this works, I was pushed into this role of being in command of this life.

This will never be my body, I'll never call it that. Its a human body I am in charge of taking care of. I try to take care of him, anyway. Most of the people I interact with will never know who or what I really am. This used to be upsetting, then it was fine, then upsetting again, I'm not really sure where in the cycle it is now. Its like a job to me really. I take care of him. I act as him. And in private spaces or around certain people I am myself. And I think now, myself is just as much an angel as an alien

These are inseparable identities. They don't really exist without each other, particular traits are just more important to one than the other. But all the traits belong to both. The stars in the night sky make me homesick. Earth is strange and beautiful. Humans are fascinating but so distant from myself. Love and devotion are the same feeling to me. This is not my body. But I take care of it. Even a lot of the physical traits I feel like my angelic self should have mirror my alien self. Sometimes it's a blur as to which I can feel

This is still new, I'm still accepting this change in how I view myself and what I am. I'm not good with change.... but I'll get there. I've spent a very long time just keeping this body alive, I'd like to rediscover who I am as the person that does that

[alienthoughts]

Oh my God that's exactly it!!!! I'd never heard this term before, thank you for adding this

Don't 100% know how to phrase what I mean here, but does anyone else feel like their species (or most prominent species, if you know you have multiple) influences you to feel like other species?

Okay I'll explain further. For a long while now I've been questioning angelkin, because I relate so much to so much angel stuff I've seen. But also, I connect with so much of that because of my source memories. So my alien-ness and memories influence this angel-ness feeling. So it's not really separate at all, I guess. But in those moments there is a level of comfort in connecting these things to a connection to angels.

Angelhearted maybe? I don't know much about being otherhearted, I'll look into it

[alienthoughts]

I feel like this whole Angel consideration is half what I’ve already said about why I feel so connected to angels, and also because we’ve had several angels in our system over the years who have since decided to fuse. So like… yeah of course I’m going to feel like this. It’s just a part of me. And I definitely feel it really strongly sometimes then it fades, so I think I like. Switch between being myself and being an Angel. But I always feel a connection to them

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Okay I feel pretty confident in this appearance (and a comparison to my regular form) I’m not completely certain about the wings, and I’m not sure about having a halo or not yet. Not confirming that I’m an Angel yet gonna think it over more

Hm.... might indulge this feeling and draw what I think an angelic form would look like. See how I feel about it then. Talking about questioning species stuff with my partner so much the past few days has some wheels turning.....

[alienthoughts]

Hm.... might indulge this feeling and draw what I think an angelic form would look like. See how I feel about it then. Talking about questioning species stuff with my partner so much the past few days has some wheels turning.....