a-mind-full-of-rats

[a-mind-full-of-rats]

It is a strange thing living each day as if there was nothing left for me in this world.

My mind races at every single second of my existence.

There is not a single day that goes by in which I'm not longing for a moment of silence.

A quiet and quick escape from everything around me.

Everything nowadays seems so tasteless.

Everything sounds the same.

It's like all of a sudden everything had been turned into black and white.

I'm forced by my peers to take part in souless routine.

It really crushes a man's spirit being unwillingly dragged into an unwanted and unwarranted amount of daily pain.

If only I had the courage to take the coward's way out.

If only I could actually do something about my sad existence.

[a-mind-full-of-rats]

There's this thing I keep dreaming about.

There is this girl that only appears in my dreams.

I don't think I've ever seen her in real life.

Or if I have, I don't remember who she is.

But whenever I dream about her, I feel this warmth, this feeling of comfort, like I've tapped into a part of my mind I haven't felt in a very long time.

She's always smiling, sometimes she's telling jokes, other times she's being goofy.

But she's always there for me, keeping me company like no one's ever done before.

I think that's why I keep seeing her so often.

Whenever I wake up from seeing her I feel heartbroken, devastated, that I must continue living an empty and meaningless life in a world where I'm truly alone.

I think this might be the first sign that I'm truly going crazy.

Maybe I've just been alone for too long...