yslgirly101

[yslgirly101]

"In a world full of cameras and social events, there’s no place for someone with anxiety, I need to get rid of it, save myself from isolation and become better."

This was said by me on Sept. 19 and I haven't done anything to make my past self happy so my future self can be happier.

I thing the worst thing in the world is letting YOURSELF down and I have done it million of times. I'm always talking about change but doing nothing to make it ¿What does that make me beside a failure? Maybe a Politician, lol.

[yslgirly101]

No Change

It's crazy to me how I fell on the rabbit hole again when I talked about it on Sept. 19 and I had the thought tha everything was going to be diffrent... it's not.

But still, I want to try, I want to try but I'm lazy, so lazy... It's so hard to wake up every morning from the bed knowing that it's going to be shitty day, that I will have to pretend to be happy once again, thata I have to pretend to go to Uni and that I'm not skipping classes becaus I feel like a fucking outcast.

[yslgirly101]

Finding comfort in the feeling of Loneliness is hard

Will I ever find someone who truly cares about me? or Will I have to be always there for everybody and have no one when I'm at my worst?

Why everyone´s life is moving and I feel mine stuck in the void? The things that I would do to have someone. The anxiety still with me, but it is kind of diffrent from last year, I feel kind of better, but at the same time I want to stop breathing and let my soul free from the mundane suffering.

What wrong I've done to deserve this? Where is this Karma coming from? I have to fucking get used to this. I don't think I'll ever get over it.

I am so lame, I will be 20 years old by 2024, why am I acting like this? why can't I create normal connections with people? Why is it so hard?

I want to talk with someone non stop about this but in my head I am no more than a burden to that person if I open up about my thoughts and feeligs. Ugh, I wish, I pray, I manifest for a better life but I don't know If I will be ever there...

[yslgirly101]

This so me core

[yslgirly101]

Me deciding which personality should I use to mask my social anxiety

[yslgirly101]

Anxiety is kicking back... Will I survive this crazy year?

I feel so anxious, I've been great all summer, why is it now that I feel like this?

My whole stomach is upside down and I've been so nervous all day, I barely feel like I am inside my body, but I promised myself I would be capable of doing this and more this year, I shouldn't let the best of me go away because I have social anxiety.

Is my future that is at stake.

Bigger problem is... I DON'T HAVE ANYTHING TO WEAR.

[yslgirly101]

Everything to my cart, even If I dont have money!

Don't we all love to shop online? I always end up having my cart with almost the whole store and the moment I get paid, I have to size it up to a normal and affordable amount of clothes.

I just wish to find a better job once I hit 25 and If I can achieve it sooner then great! Also, I'm going to the city tomorrow, I will try to buy some magazine to read on the train, maybe ELLE since I already have the Vogue September...

[yslgirly101]

How difficult is it to try to be someone when you can't count on nobody?

To achieve what I really desire, what I really aspire to become, I have to let go my need of always having someone there for me, depending on someone to understand my ambition and to help me make it real.

I have to become a strong individual, I have to beat this and I have to shine. I want people looking up to me, wanting to be me and no losing hope in trying because what I'm trying to do is not easy and especially with my background and financial status... still I am going to do my best.

First thing? Beat anxiety. In a world full of cameras and social events, there's no place for someone with anxiety, I need to get rid of it, save myself from isolation and become better.

[yslgirly101]

The style I want: Preppy Girl

I am going to be a University Student, so the most appropiate style to use is: Preppy.

Here are some examples of my vision

I've seen clothes like this in the new season of MANGO sO, If I bought them, I will share it <3

[yslgirly101]

Taking a risk but make it fashionable

I am 19 soon to be 20 and all my life, all I ever wanted, was be part of the fashion world.

First, I wanted to be a fashion designer but my family didn't approve, now I'm studying a degree I don't like, but I've been thinking really hard about enrolling myself in an online course of fashion marketing while I keep studying. I am ready for the double life.

If I find a job soon, I will enroll for Spring Season and I'll write my expierence to keep track. I am so excited, but I also realize that I might not achieve it... I only can hope.

[yslgirly101]

Theme Camellia by Seyche

Here I leave the link to the page, there's tutorials and everything in the page, the author has a lot of diverse themes but I felt in love with this one for now!