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yllowjacketz · 4 days ago

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⋆⁺ ✮⋆⁺ Wilderness!Lottie Matthews x Reader

Synopsis: {Headcannons loosely based on this request} AN: I say loosely because I got so carried away with this, sorry. I love her sm. Thank you for the request annon. !!-18-!! towards the end.

♡︎ Lottie was attached to your hip from the moment she first met you—you were the new girl in the neighbourhood who moved in from out of town. There was just something about your energy she absolutely adored, and the pair of you immediately clicked together like puzzle pieces!

♡︎ You two soon became inseparable— wherever Lottie was you were and vice versa. The rest of the Yellowjackets have an absolute field day making fun of you and the whole ‘codependency’ thing you two have going on.

♡︎ Sleepovers were a constant thing— Lottie always went all out, like above and beyond. Daddy’s money paid for fancy face masks and other self-care stuff that cost what should be considered an illegal amount, matching pj’s, rented DVDs, nail polish, etc… etc.

♡︎ She borderline spoils you. Birthdays or a random ass Tuesday morning it didn’t matter to Lottie. You were her best friend so why wouldn’t she want to appreciate you?— or steal the occasional item here and there because it was literally made for you so duh you just have to have it!

♡︎ Lottie splurged extra hard on one particular piece of jewellery— it was a bracelet, a pretty rose gold colour encrusted with the most beautiful gems that twinkled oh so prettily with a matching one in a slightly different colour. As soon as she had seen the set she immediately thought of you.

♡︎ It was worth all the trouble, seeing your eyes light up in surprise— the “Oh Lot I can’t take this, this looks so expensive.” That flies from your lips, it makes her so happy and she immediately shakes off your worries with a gentle, “Don’t be silly, we’re matching now.”

♡︎ You go to every single one of Lottie's games whether they were away or at home and each and every time she’d be looking out for you in the stands— a smile so wide it hurts her cheeks, watching you jump up and down, waving at her with a Yellowjacket painted on your cheek.

♡︎ Lottie soon came to the devastating realisation that she felt a whole lot more than just friendship towards you after she won a game and you came rushing out onto the pitch with everyone else— beelining to her to congratulate her. It makes her head spin.

♡︎ Her heart has never pounded against her ribcage so violently before, the feeling of your arms wrapping around her tightly. It almost took her out— she doesn’t know if she’s shaking from the adrenaline or the fact that you’re so close to her, wearing her number, her jersey, in her team colours.

♡︎ Lottie really wanted to kiss you the night before they left for nationals. After the party when everyone else had left and the pair of you were sitting in your car outside of her house— your fingers drumming nervously against the car wheel. You looked so pretty, with gloss on your lips that she desperately wanted to kiss off as you went on about how much of a bust the party was— she wasn’t even listening.

♡︎ But unfortunately she totally chickens out and spends the entire night completely torn up over it— the poor girl didn’t get a wink of sleep.

♡︎ You weren’t even meant to be on that plane— but you were the photographer for the school's paper and they wanted you to snap some shots for the team during nationals so there you were, sitting next to Lottie, pinky curled around her own as she tries to calm your nerves.

♡︎ The crash had really taken everything out of you— the first day wasn’t bad, you clung to naive hope that you would be rescued— you clung to Lottie who made sure you were eating the rations and drinking water, changed the bandage on your palm and wrapped extra blankets around your shoulders during the nights, but then the days turned to weeks.

♡︎ It felt like everyone had embraced different roles with ease whereas you kinda just floated around— flitting between just sitting there with a blank expression to doing an odd job here and there with the least amount of effort, trying to not be seen as a deadweight.

♡︎ It scared her more than she’d like to admit, watching the light slowly dwindle away from your usually bright eyes— your attitude doing a complete one-eighty from normal. It only made her hold you extra tightly as you slept, whispering soft affirmations against your shoulder. “We’ll be okay.” Reassuring herself just as much as you.

♡︎ She felt so helpless just watching you retreat in your own head— you didn’t speak much to anyone and Lottie only got a few sentences out of you, little victories she’d call them. “Hey, come braid my hair?” She’d ask softly, nudging your shoulder in hopes the task might keep you grounded, anything to get you out of your own head. “Mhm, yeah, kay.” The smile that ghosts over your lips is enough for her. And for a few short moments, it almost felt like a sleepover again, one big fucked up sleepover as you weave the damp locks of her dark hair into a braid.

♡︎ Lottie got you to do a little bit more than just what was expected of you— helping you wash clothes and so on because she didn’t want the other girls to start berating you. “I’m sorry.” your words were nothing short of guilty, a dejection in your eyes that pained her. “Hey, it’s fine. You’re fine.” She’d always reassure you.

♡︎ She’d watch you sketch out the surrounding landscape— cheek resting against your shoulder marvelling at the way you drag the pencil across the paper. Those sketches would soon help make a map that Natalie and Travis became reliant on, it was one of the tiny ways you helped out. Plus it was fun, you enjoyed it— mostly enjoyed the way Lottie would sit right up next to you praising your work beneath her breath.

♡︎ The cabin could be suffocating at times so the pair of you would take walks— enjoying the nature and peace that it brought despite the rough times. Mostly she just liked to admire you, watching you pluck wildflowers to decorate the cabin. “Those a pretty.” Her voice would be impossibly gentle, always with you, her fingertips brushing past yours. “You’d suit them,” she adds in a whisper, tucking the flower behind your ear and all you can do is stutter out a soft— “O-Oh thank you.”

♡︎ The one thing Lottie couldn’t handle was you being distant— drawing away from her, she would call you out on it. “You’re acting strange.” She would state as if you hadn’t been acting ‘strange’ since the crash. Her words only make you scoff, shaking your head. “Yeah, no shit. Look around Lot, we’re fucked.” The quiver in your tone dismantles her into something much more gentle, her hands reaching out for yours to stop you from sharpening the hunting knife. “We’ll get through it, just— just please stop pushing me away, I need you.” She practically pleads with you, squeezing your hands a little tighter as her soft, brown eyes tear up slightly. You nod with a shaky sigh, “I need you too Lottie.” She doesn’t hesitate to pull you into a hug, face pressed into your neck with a mumbled, “I’ve got you.”

♡︎ You’re the only person she really trusts, she would spend all night talking to you about her ‘Visions’ and you’d soothe her— hand over her heart guiding her through breaths. “You— You can feel it too, right?” She asks, trembling. “Yeah, I feel it, Lot. I feel it.” And you did, you felt it through her. Something at least.

♡︎ Lots of late nights, your head resting in her lap as she plays with your hair— it was during these times that your voice would find you again, if only briefly. “I’m scared Lottie.” The words muffled against her thigh. She brushes her thumb over your jaw, making you look up at her. “Don’t be. It loves you, it’ll protect you. I promise.” and you trust her.

♡︎ Lottie would give you little trinkets to keep you safe. It brought you impossibly closer and you believed it was the only reason you kept surviving through each day, that Lottie was the only reason.

♡︎ She had a whole morning routine with you, she literally couldn’t start her day off without it— otherwise, she wouldn’t stop worrying about you even if you spend the whole day practically attached to her. “What do you hear?” Her hand was warm, clasped around your own. “The firewood, crackling, it’s like an applause,” you reply, thumb caressing over her knuckles slowly.

♡︎ It all became so different one morning— it happened after a particularly rough night and Lottie really just needed to feel closer to you more than ever. “What do you feel?” Her voice was low, calm as always yet now twinged with a certain edge— her forehead resting against your own. “You, I feel you, your breaths… it’s comforting.” Your words are hushed, breathing intermingling. “I feel you too. I always feel you.”

♡︎ The pair of you leaned in until your lips met, the kiss was slow— tender. “Lottie—” you whisper, her hands immediately cupping your face, mouth chasing after yours with a feverish, “I know…” as she deepens the kiss.

♡︎ Lottie quickly became utterly addicted, hooked on the taste of your lips and any excuse was a good one when it came to sneaking you out of your chores. You would be trying to hang up the washing when her arms would snake around your waist, lips grazing along the sensitive curve of your jaw— “It’s calling for you, the wilderness, it needs you.” whispered hotly against your neck.

♡︎ You’re all hers no matter the cheap excuse— she was just too damn good at convincing you and kissing you.

♡︎ Lottie would ‘bless’ you in her own unique way down in the lake— her thumb pricked and pearling with blood that she rubs across your forehead, a pattern you couldn't see. “Nothing will hurt you.” It’s a statement, a promise, that she seals by pressing her bloody thumb to your lips, dragging it across the pillowy flesh, before kissing you— the coppery taste only urges her to deepen the kiss.

♡︎ Blessings to the wilderness would just be her laying you down beneath the craved-out tree stump— her face between your thighs making come undone on her tongue and fingers over and over again until the ‘wilderness’ was sated— although it was never truly sated, it was a bottomless pit when it came to you.

♡︎ The codependency jokes from before the plane crash were never truer— you definitely got some snide comments from the girls especially during the colder, rougher days when everyone was really feeling the hunger. Lottie wouldn’t hesitate to immediately step up for you with furrowed brows and a curled lip— “Back off.” bared teeth and a wild glossiness glazing over her big brown eyes.

♡︎ Sometimes they get to you because a part of you— deep down knows what they say is true. You were dependent on Lottie, more than you even realise. She comforts you whenever their comments stab a little harder than usual. “They’re right, Lot. I’m useless— I don’t do shit.” you sigh, face pressed against her shoulder as her hand caresses your back slowly. “Sshh, they don’t know anything— they’ll understand soon, how important you are.” She gives you a caring smile, pressing a lingering kiss to the corner of your mouth and it's enough to make you feel better.

♡︎ There are times when you don’t understand her, but it’s the blind trust that keeps you by her side without question—a trust that she’ll keep you safe no matter what happens, and it makes all this a lot more bearable.

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