yapoholics-anonymous

[yapoholics-anonymous]

I think it's genuinely concerning how sex-negative we, as a society, are becoming. (This post brought to you by a few tweets I saw)

Does no one else think it's genuinely worrying how if you even find a fictional character attractive, you're called a gooner, or a degenerate, or some other pejorative to indicate that being sexual in any way is gross and nasty and yucky? Why does art suddenly lack artistic value because it's sexual in nature? Why are we so obsessed with associating a core feature of the human condition with shame and guilt?

Even more concerning is that it isn't just some niche little group of people on the internet, it's rampant. Every nook and cranny of the internet has these people, ready and raring to call you names if you dare speak anything slightly not-safe-for-work.

Like the people on twitter openly calling trans women degenerates and freaks for having an incest/rape kink (I've seen this one A LOT), because how can you claim to be an ally, or lgbt-friendly, or a feminist, but get mad at a woman expressing her sexuality? Why does sexuality gross you out to the point you feel the need to demean people over it?

And where does it end? Are we going to start calling women who dress a little too revealing 'sluts' again? Are we going to ban sex scenes in movies? Start preaching abstinence, say sex outside of marriage is bad, that lust is immoral, and being gay is a sin?

I'm sure that a large part of the problem is that these people are generally children, and still in the "sex is gross" phase, but I know that's not the case with all of them. I'm just worried for the future, because all the people saying these things are just reinventing conservatism under the guise of progressivism, and are (intentionally or unintentionally, I'm not sure) causing more harm than good.

I know we talk about puritanism and stuff all the time, but in my opinion, it's gotten to a point even the actual puritans didn't get to.

[yapoholics-anonymous]

Men wanna talk about radicalisation when boys start doing badly in school and voting for actual felons? Isn't it funny how leftist men have decided that *now* is the point where they need to put their foot down, as though it's been give-and-take battles between the sexes throughout history and not women getting abused constantly across nearly every single culture and religion and finally deciding they've had enough

[yapoholics-anonymous]

I wish that people who identify as nonbinary could just admit that it’s a subculture. They have more in common with emos and goths than with homosexuals and bisexuals…they aren’t experiencing oppression for the way they were born, at worst they’re experiencing bullying for the way they choose to express themselves. So why are we supposed to consider them Super Special And Oppressed Queers when they just aren’t? They need to just leave LGB people alone and embrace the fact that they are an aesthetic-based subculture, not an oppressed minority.

[yapoholics-anonymous]

[yapoholics-anonymous]

“Paraphilia”

[yapoholics-anonymous]

the double standard is telling.

people want an excuse to bash women. period. they look for whichever women society has deemed "bad" and "worthy of criticism," and use it to justify their hatred of women.

i feel like there needs to be more neil gaiman hate, i expected him to get the jkr treatment. everyone has just been like "oh i'm so upset, I looked up to him so much :(". where's the harassment? where's the pipebombs? where's the thinkpiece about how dead boy detectives was fascist this whole time?

[yapoholics-anonymous]

"women, if you don't include every group in your struggle against oppression, then you are no better than the men that oppress you" bffr

[yapoholics-anonymous]

people aren't saying "you can only talk about male victims and female victims sepertaly," they are saying that not everything has to be about men. op made a post specifically targeting 14-19 year old girls and was trying to specifically help them. op was not saying that anyone outside of that group can't be preyed upon.

there was nothing wrong with the original post, and adding an addition to said post about other victims of predation is fine, and actually can be helpful. but saying it in such a way that demonizes the original post by accusing op of not caring about male victims, asking "don't you think they should be told how to stay safe too," attacks someone just trying to spread support.

not explicitly including every single group in a help-post isn't oppressive, and staying that girls can be groomed doesn't mean that men can't be groomed either.

reminder to all 14-19 year olds girls. that grown man does not like you. you are a victim

[yapoholics-anonymous]

my fyp is beautifully curated

creds to @moidh8ter on tt

[yapoholics-anonymous]

they don't have male rape centers because men don't want to build them and male victims would likely be further victimized in an enclosed space that could be easily infiltrated by predators

When people are saying that rape is worse for male victims than for female victims, I feel like the quiet part is "because women are used to it."

[yapoholics-anonymous]

She was intimate w a transfem and showed allyship and her reward is being sexually degraded and mocked in public without her consent. If this is how they treat the women that sleep with them and support their identity, then what's the benefit of not being a TERF.

Notice that "transwomen are women" but they always go out of their way to specify "cisgirl" when bragging about "pounding" or being sexually degrading. They know exactly who the real women are.

Men never change.

[yapoholics-anonymous]

Genuinely, what happened to “feminism is for everyone”?

That’s the feminism I grew up with: encouraging people to recognize that fighting sexism and restrictive gender roles helps folks of every gender. We’d push back on the idea that feminists hate men, pointing to inclusive feminist literature and how many men are feminists.

Now, there are so many people insisting that the solution to patriarchy is to openly hate and ostracize men no matter what. Why? What is the benefit? It’s certainly not effective in fighting oppressive structures to exclude half the population from your cause on the basis of immutable traits. It may feel cathartic to say horrible things about men and try to punish them for your frustrations with patriarchy. But the only actual effect I see is the increasing right-wing radicalization of young men, who are being told that the left hates them for the way they were born and presented with an abundance of proof that it’s true.

Why are we going back to treating men and women as different species? It doesn’t fix things to say “well women are the good gender and men are the bad one” this time. If you sincerely want to dismantle sexism, you’re going to have to unpack and let go of all sex and gender essentialism—even that which considers women inherently pure and men inherently immoral.

[yapoholics-anonymous]

can't get over that the character the v-tuber chose to talk about feminism hurting men is showing at least half of her chest. like they aren't evening trying to hide what they think about women.

I couldn't have said it better myself.

[yapoholics-anonymous]

it probably is difficult to chose between:

mean people challenging existing and exploitive power structures that directly benefit you and nazis that are nice to you

I couldn't have said it better myself.

[yapoholics-anonymous]

"this post shouldn't have been gendered" make another post.

you can (and should) support male victims of grooming AND also support female victims. not everything has to be about men.

reminder to all 14-19 year olds girls. that grown man does not like you. you are a victim

[yapoholics-anonymous]

"In a capitalist culture that generates continuously-evolving countercultures and promotes self-discovery and uniqueness — a culture in which “basic” is an insult — the person who transitions even though their original “box” was a better fit is doing so in order to be measured as unusual on a new yardstick. If you’re a person who likes video games, does computer programming for a living, and watches a lot of pornography, your place on the “man” yardstick positions you as not terribly unusual, and not terribly desirable. But on the “woman” yardstick, measured from the perspective of their own male gaze (“why, I’d love to meet a woman who liked video games, porn, and programming!”), they become an unusual, desirable nerdy girl."

The fuck is the yardstick????

I am so glad you asked dear friend!! (I know this person in real life, lol. She's not being aggressive this is just how we talk.)

The yardstick is my favorite metaphor for trans ideology, and it comes from this article, which I heavily heavily encourage basically everyone I know (and everyone who runs across this post) to read. I think it's dead-on and I really don't have much to add to it in terms of content. It's an explanation of why at least I, and a lot of other radfems and radleaning, oppose the concept of gender identity. In essence, we should not be measuring each other according to pre-set societal and patriarchal standards at all, and so the yardsticks (aka gender identity) are detrimental, mostly to women, regardless of anything else. READ THE ARTICLE.

[yapoholics-anonymous]