xjoel

[xjoel]

❁◕ ‿ ◕❁

[xjoel]

Oh, baby girl.

[xjoel]

club penguin bans sentence starters

"i'm a fucking piece of pizza,"

"holy shit toto, we sure as fuck ain't in kansas anymore,"

"i ain't fucking with these christmas lights anymore,"

"why is the only angry one black?"

"get in loser, we're going sledding,"

"jesus fucking christ, that cookie hot as shit,"

"ah yes, my meth lab is ready,"

"i need this life vest 'cos i'm drowning in the pussy,"

"i could kill you right now, no one would wear you scream,"

"i could go back and pretend to be you,"

"fashion police, you're definitely under arrest,"

"you're tearing this family apart, ___"

"what do you mean you're being murdered? that's illegal, people can't do that,"

"i'm wanted for stealing yo girl/boy,"

"wanna hear a joke? your future,"

"i would like to order all the money,"

"when i see stars i think of you. because you're only beautiful from a distance,"

"do it for the vine,"

"you dress like an idiot,"

"girl/boy, are you because i want to take you out,"

"hey you forgot something. your social life,"

"help me hide this body in here,"

"did you just propose, using emojis?"

"do drugs they said. it will be fun they said,"

"it's called capitalism,"

"thank you for helping me commit cannibalism,"

"shit, we on national television,"

"bitch, throw one more snowball at me,"

"can you leave my house please?"

"i'm sensing you're a bit of a bitch,"

"can i pay you in swag?"

"excuse me, do you know where i can find the booty?"

"what the flipper?"

"santa isn't real,"

"what do penguins do in a race? they peng-win,"

"a milkshake ain't a goddamn pizza,"

"locked up because my eyebrow game was too strong,"

"man, look at all this fuckin' dope,"

"fuck it, i ain't running,"

"hey, do you wanna join my gang?"

"i'll ask my mom,"

"smooth as butter,"

[xjoel]

❛❛ All I want for Christmas is peace & quiet. ❜❜

                ❛ ain’t it awful shameful how you stay around someone so long,                                                     you start soundin’ like them? ❜

[xjoel]

💀

       DARK STARTERS --

                    ❛I won’t tell you anything. ❜

[xjoel]

❛❛ Is this what you do every Christmas? ❜❜

                CHRISTMAS. how could it possibly be called that anymore? how could one possibly celebrate it anymore?                                  ❛ ain’t nothin’ but a hallmark-holiday. ❜                       such a grinch, but he truly hadn’t celebrated a single Christmas since that previous year... before everything...

[xjoel]

“can’t you listen to me?”

            icy shock struck his spine, frozen in place by her words. her outburst interrupting his lecture, once again putting herself in danger without thinking of consequence, he went off on a rant, chewing her ear off with harsh words, tone even harsher. the flames that burned in his veins calmed as he stood, eyes fixated on the girl in front of him. far from the one he had met, that fourteen year old with only a knife to protect herself and the fear of god in her. now she was older, wiser, unafraid, willing to prove how much she was ready to protect herself.                                     ❛ you’re not ready yet, Ellie. ❜                    but was it really her that was not ready? or himself.

[xjoel]

“you mumble in your sleep.”

             a flash of a memory, hand dragging down weathered face, nails scratching at the salt and pepper beard, each day giving one more white hair it seems, but he’s hardly noticed, time passed him in what seemed like a haze until the moment he found HER.                               ❛ did I wake you, kiddo? sorry... ❜                     the nightmares plagued him again, even with her back, but now instead of her young face, round and innocent, free of the pain of the apocalypse, it’s her grown up. aged 20 years forward, he craddled her in his arms, blood pouring from a gun wound, but instead of a soldier... there stood a firefly.                                         ❛ go back to sleep, b-- SARAH. didn’t mean to wake you. ❜                            she wasn’t his baby girl anymore, she was a fully grown adult, but the slip wasn’t of his fault, simply reactionary... especially after THAT dream. he turned over, but didn’t fall back asleep, he stayed awake, listening to her, every once in a while stealing a glance back.

[xjoel]

hxnestthcef

                     death glares.

me? bully her? she’s the one threatening to break my nose old man!

                    & I’m very proud.

[xjoel]

                   death glares.

[xjoel]

Suicide Squad: The Album

Purple Lamborghini.

‘ murder on my mind. ’

‘ it’s time to pray to God. ’

‘ I might make a mistake ’

‘ this is Gotham City. ’

‘ got that purple Lamborghini lurkin’. ’

‘ forgive me for my wrongs, I have just begun. ’

‘ don’t be beggin’ for your life ‘cause that’s a lost cause. ’

‘ make up your mind, baby, ‘cause the time is here. ’

‘ need a couple gang members for these new endeavors. ’

‘ from this point on anything we do we do together. ’

‘ seven figures, I spend that every other month. ’

‘ every day was life and death, that’s when the cash came. ’

Sucker For Pain.

‘ i torture you. ’

‘ take my hand through the flames. ’

‘ i’m a slave to your games. ’

‘ i wanna chain you up. ’

‘ i wanna tie you down. ’

‘ i’m just a sucker for pain. ’

‘ i got the squad tatted on me from my neck to my ankles. ’

‘ pressure from the man got us all in rebellion? ’

‘ we gon’ go to war, yeah, without failure. ’

‘ love and the loyalty that’s what we stand for. ’

‘ alienated by society. ’

‘ all this pressure give me anxiety. ’

‘ so we put the world on our shoulders. ’

‘ you don’t know me. ’

‘ we’re the ones you trust in. ’

‘ I won’t hesitate to go straight to your head like a concussion. ’

‘ devoted to destruction ’

‘ a full dosage of detrimental dysfunction ’

‘ see I’m a fool for pain ’

‘ that’s why my heart cold, full of sorrow, the lost soul ’

‘ this is what we wanted from a young age ’

Heathens.

‘ all my friends are heathens. ’

‘ take it slow. ’

‘ wait for them to ask you who you know. ’

‘ please don’t make any sudden moves. ’

‘ you don’t know the half of the abuse. ’

‘ we check the guns at the door. ’

‘ doesn’t mean our brains will change. ’

‘ how’d I get here, sitting next to you? ’

‘ please don’t forget. ’

‘ we don’t deal with outsiders very well. ’

‘ they say newcomers have a certain smell. ’

‘ you have trust issues. ’

‘ they say they can smell your intentions. ’

‘ why’d you come? ’

‘ you knew you should have stayed. ’

‘ I tried to warn you just to stay away. ’

‘ they’re outside ready to bust.’

‘ it looks like you might be one of us.’

Standing in the Rain.

‘ i saw you standing in the rain. ’

‘ you were holding his hand. ’

‘ i’ll never be the same. ’

‘ dressed like a playboy. ’

‘ the money eases everybody’s mind. ’

‘ i should have known when you stole money. ’

‘ slide your panties to the side. ’

‘ i got old money. ’

Gangsta.

‘ i need a gangsta to love me better than all the others do. ’

‘ always forgive me. ’

‘ ride or die with me. ’

‘ i’m fucked up. ’

‘ i’m black and blue. ’

‘ i’m built for it, all the abuse. ’

‘ i got secrets that nobody knows. ’

‘ i don’t want what i can get. ’

‘ i want someone with secrets that nobody knows. ’

‘ my freakness is on the loose. ’

‘ running all over you. ’

‘ take me to places that nobody knows. ’

‘ you got me hooked up on a feeling ’

‘ i’m barely breathing. ’

‘ don’t let me go. ’

Know Better.

‘ you should know better. ’

‘ i’m a winner. ’

‘ now we’re getting it for real. ’

‘ shoulda left you right there where i met you. ’

‘ i’m a bread winner. ’

‘ no talkin’. ’

‘ we finish it. ’

‘ some say i’m ignorant. ’

‘ maybe i’m different. ’

‘ looked at you like you were special. ’

‘ somebody called a riot? ’

‘ teach them how to trust one another. ’

‘ all we have is us. ’

‘ shit like this is hard to come by. ’

You Don’t Own Me.

‘ you don’t own me. ’

‘ i can always have just what i want. ’

‘ she’s the baddest. ’

‘ i would love to flaunt. ’

‘ take her shopping, you know yves saint laurent? ’

‘ she got her own dough. ’

‘ i’m not just one of your many toys. ’

‘ don’t say i can’t go with other boys. ’

‘ don’t tell me what to do. ’

‘ don’t tell me what to say. ’

‘ when i go out with you don’t put me on display. ’

‘ don’t try to change me in anyway. ’

‘ don’t tie me down cause i’d never stay. ’

‘ i get bored of basic bitches. ’

‘ straight up vicious. ’

‘ i texted her asking her if she’s alone and if she’d send some pictures.. ’

‘ she said no. ’

‘ she said come over and see it for yourself. ’

‘ independent woman. ’

‘ stay up til we see the sun. ’

‘ she does it better than I’ve ever seen it done. ’

‘ that’s when she told me she ain’t never ever gonna be owned. ’

Without Me.

‘ guess who’s back. ’

‘ back again. ’

‘ i’m chopped liver. ’

‘ if you want shady this is what i’ll give ya ’

‘ all the memories that we make will never change. ’

‘ you waited this long. ’

‘ now stop debating. ’

‘ but it feels so empty without me. ’

‘ I just settled all my lawsuits. ’

‘ fuck you, debbie. ’

‘ now this looks like a job for me. ’

‘ so everybody, just follow me. ’

‘ we need a little controversy. ’

‘ little hellions. ’

‘ feeling rebellious? ’

‘ could start a revolution. ’

‘ so just let me revel and back in the fact that i got everyone kissing my ass. ’

‘ testing, attention please. ’

‘ you sent for me? ’

‘ nobody listens to techno. ’

‘ i’ll be there with a whole list full of new insults. ’

‘ i’m not the first king of controversy. ’

‘ there’s a concept that works ’

‘ it’ll be so empty without me. ’

Wreak Havoc.

‘ they call me a menace. ’

‘ they say that i’m cursed. ’

‘ something about me is making them jealous ’

‘ so listen and learn. ’

‘ i’m surrounded by cowards. ’

‘ that’s why i got all the power. ’

‘ i’m where you wanna be. ’

‘ all of my enemies made a decision, it’s better to follow me. ’

‘ i make no apologies. ’

‘ all of my sins I would repeat and repeat. ’

‘ i’ll be me til the death of me. ’

‘ i can smell your fear. ’

‘ the only reason that i’m here is to wreak havoc. ’

‘ everybody’s praying that i’ll change, yeah maybe one day but tomorrow i’ll be back at it. ’

‘ bad habits they die hard ’

‘ we live fast we die hard. ’

‘ go against me you’ll die hard. ’

‘ Thrive when I’m beating the man ’

‘ straight outta context. ’

‘ hate that you need me. ’

‘ wanna destroy me but you can’t. ’

‘ and if love is real maybe I’m just too bad to remember how good it feels ’

Medieval Warfare.

‘ i’ve been looking for a diamond. ’

‘ it shines like ice. ’

‘ baby you can have it if you say it nice. ’

‘ come on, baby, let’s do something ugly. something you would never touch yourself. ’

‘ can you kill a man with your hands? ’

‘ are you hot? ’

‘ do you want me? ’

‘ think i don’t understand? ’

‘ i’ve been sleeping with a rifle. ’

‘ come on, baby, let’s do something pretty. something you would never touch yourself. ’

Bohemian Rhapsody.

‘ Is this the real life? ’

‘ Is this just fantasy? ’

‘ no escape from reality. ’

‘ i need no sympathy ’

‘ because i’m easy come, easy go. ’

‘ mama, i just killed a man. ’

‘ put a gun against his head pulled my trigger now he’s dead. ’

‘ now i’ve gone and thrown it all away. ’

‘ didn’t mean to make you cry. ’

‘ if i’m not back again this time tomorrow, carry on. ’

‘ send shivers down my spine. ’

‘ body’s aching all the time. ’

‘ i don’t want to die. ’

‘ i sometimes wish i’d never been born at all. ’

‘ i see a little silhouetto of a man. ’

‘ thunderbolts and lightning very, very frightening.  ’

‘ nobody loves me. ’

‘ he’s just a poor boy from a poor family. ’

‘ so you think you can stone me and spit in my eye? ’

‘ nothing really matters. ’

Slippin’ Into Darkness.

‘ I was slippin’ into darkness when they took my friend away. ’

‘ he loves to drink good whiskey. ’

‘ i talk to my brother. ’

‘ i got a wife and a baby. ’

‘ I was slippin’ into darkness when I heard my mother say. ’

‘ you’ve been slippin’ into darkness. ’

‘ pretty soon you’re gonna pay. ’

Fortunate Son.

‘ some folks are born made to wave the flag. ’

‘ they point the cannon at you. ’

‘ it ain’t me. ’

‘ i ain’t no senator’s son. ’

‘ i ain’t no fortunate one. ’

‘ some folks are born silver spoon in hard. ’

‘ don’t they help themselves? ’

‘ the house looks like a rummage sale. ’

‘ I ain’t no millionaire’s son. ’

‘ how much should we give? ’

I Started a Joke.

‘ I started a joke. ’

‘ But I didn’t see that the joke was one me. ’

‘ Oh, if I’d only seen that the joke was on me. ’

[xjoel]

“the last of us” inspired sentence starters

change pronouns/ect if necessary

“i sell hardcore drugs.”

“we need help.”

“you’re gonna be okay.”

“believe in the fireflies.”

“got enough ration cards to last us a few months.”

“be careful.”

“i am the romantic type.”

“don’t leave me to turn.”

“it’s gettin’ close to curfew.”

“going outside the wall is suicide.”

“you mumble in your sleep.”

“i hate bad dreams.”

“it’s called luck—and it’s gonna run out.”

“are you still breathing?”

“we’re shitty people.”

“our luck had to run out sooner or later.”

“don’t touch me.”

“she’s infected.”

“just fucking go.”

“i can’t swim.”

“does it sound like i know how to whistle?”

“i’m a pretty good shot with that thing.”

“let’s get the hell outta here.”

“goddammit—i’m clean!”

“i owe you nothin’.”

“there’s one inside.”

“it’s the normal people that scare me.”

“you of all people should understand that.”

“i can handle myself.”

“once upon a time, i had somebody i had to look after.”

“you don’t need to worry about me.”

“fuckin’ hunters.”

“i’ve been on both sides.”

“so–you kill a lot of innocent people?”

“you sacrifice the few to save the many.”

“i don’t think they saw us.”

“trust me, it ain’t easy.”

“damn it—spores.”

“somethin’ on your mind?”

“you make every shot count.”

“just so we’re clear… it was either him or me.”

“how’d i do?”

“yeah, well, i was tryin’ to kill you.”

“you’re bleeding.”

“we can help each other.”

“i saved you!”

“you wanna hear a joke about pizza? …never mind, it was too cheesy.”

“how is it you’re never scared?”

“what are you scared of?”

“i’m scared of ending up alone.”

“it’s all your fault!”

“thanks for not blowin’ my head off.”

“you survived because of me.”

“you lay your hands on me again, it won’t end well for you.”

“you still remember how to kill, right?”

“hey, hey—are you hurt?”

“i guess we’re both disappointed with each other, then.”

“what do you want from me?”

“i can’t get infected!”

“you are treading on some mighty thin ice here.”

“i’ve lost people, too.”

“you have no idea what loss is.”

“everyone i’ve ever cared for has either died or left me.”

“sounds like runners.”

“can you walk?”

“stay the fuck back!”

“i think we’re safe.”

“you’re a better shot with that thing than i am.”

“don’t sound so disappointed.”

“you handled yourself pretty nice back there.”

“i believe that everything happens for a reason.”

“you’re just a kid.”

“i can protect you.”

“i’ll come back for you.”

“you’re a fucking animal.”

“you have no idea what i’m capable of.”

“i’m gonna teach you how to play guitar.”

“another city, another abandoned quarantine zone.”

“is this everything you were hoping for?”

“we don’t have to do this.”

“i ain’t leavin’ without you.”

“i guess you can’t escape your past.”

“hands in the fucking air!”

“i pretty much lost everything.”

“no matter what, you keep finding something to fight for.”

[xjoel]

fircflycargo:

you break one goddamn vase and suddenly you’re a CRIMINAL

             thinks of the many times Joel has heard crashing sounds and found Ellie and AK standing in a pile of rubble. shudders.

[xjoel]

"Whoa, that's purple... It looks like your shoulder is dislocated."

               groans of pain escaped, lungs pumping as he tried to regain his composure. taking hold of her hand, he pressed it to the shoulder, his eyes catching hold of hers.                            ❛ push it back, Ellie. ❜                    she was the only one who could do it in that moment, and it needed to be done. he didn’t care if he had to yell to get her to do it.

[xjoel]

              Deer in the chase                  There as I flew     Forgot all prayers of joining you                                                                                     I clutched my life                                                                                    And wished it kept                                                                                      My dearest love

                        —  I’m not done yet

                                ind. Joel rp 3 years exp as Joel.                                               By Sel.

[xjoel]

“Don’t be an ass.”

                      resisting the urge to roll his eyes, he simply turned away from the girl, continuing on his way. it was impossible for him to leave off the cold attitude, the grime of survival coating his personality into the hardened man that stood before her.                                              ❛ don’t get in my way. ❜

[xjoel]

Ask a Killer

| Heroes or Villains, Killing May Be Relative |

♔ :First kill

♕ :Last kill

♖ :A kill you regret

♗ :A kill you have been known to boast about

♘ :How you prefer to kill someone

♙ :Most malicious act tied to your name

♚ :A time when you showed mercy

♛ :A time when mercy was requested but not provided

♜ :Post-kill actions, thoughts, or emotions

♝ :Ever killed for sport?

♞ :Define a good kill

♟ :A close call to being killed yourself