workplacecomedian

[workplacecomedian]

[workplacecomedian]

okay so i finished checking if we were friends in every universe and, uh, it turns out we're only friends in 6 of them. but look, i need you to understand these universes vary like crazy, okay? like 6 is actually insanely high, like way higher than most. and one of those is the universe where i accidentally killed the actor who played Dipsy from Teletubbies when i was 7 and my life went completely differently as a result. and we still ended up friends! also you were a girl in that universe for some reason. what? oh, uh, yeah, you were cute as hell. like really cute. did you just fucking giggle

[workplacecomedian]

[TMAGP spoilers] Because i love providing the tiniest grains of false hope for Somewhere Else believers: if its assumed that hilltop is trying to balance by getting rid of counterparts, and this world's martin and john died to it, then something decided TMA's john was Enough of a john to compare and replace- aka, enough of a human, or at least little enough inhuman

[workplacecomedian]

that old whump trope of the character hiding their injuries until they cannot anymore but they’re hiding their injuries because they got hurt in a really stupid way and it’s too embarrassing to explain. not because they’re stoic and everyone is depending on them or whatever.

[workplacecomedian]

It feels. I dunno. Almost ironic that the first time i listened to tmagp ep 1 i thought the username was 'redkinherring' or something. Red herring isnt the exact opposite of canary in the coal mines, but damn

[workplacecomedian]

This has been keeping me up at night. What about Danny was special to the Stranger that Nikola would bust out Grimaldi? What were they planning with him? Was he special or was she just saying that? And if Nikola was just saying that then why did she wear Grimaldi’s skin and put on a show to kill him (or I guess not kill but. Show) in front of Tim? I’m going insane.

[workplacecomedian]

Polycule but it’s just two people in a romantic relationship with each other and their third who’s pretty obviously aroace but also somehow so deeply intertwined in their lives that it’d just be wrong to not count them as involved. Is this anything.

[workplacecomedian]

idk how to describe it but the vibe of the magnus protocol versus the magnus archives is different. tma is like. real and serious scary stories with some levity every so often just so we don't go crazy and start eating each other. but tmagp is almost...silly? whimsical even? there's a man made out of needles that kills people by hugging them. there's the Most Obvious Rich People Are Evil metaphor ever. someone dies from heart failure after getting canceled on the internet. bloodsucking baby. a guy gets eaten by many snakes at once and that's it that's all it is. don't even get me fucking started on mr. bonzo or we'll be here all day. y'all are getting up to some absolute gravity falls shit in here. what's next triangle yaoi?

[workplacecomedian]

Gertrude Robinson in her recordings:

This statement is worrying. It would indicate that the Evil Bastard Conglomerate™ is more active than ever. How is Geoff Von Poopenfarten involved in this? What are his intentions towards the Scrimblo artifact? This completely changes what we know about The Scrunkly, and what it wants. I have to consult The Dipshit League on this matter! If you're listening to this, I will store all the answers in my secret base on Mars that i have built. They should be safe from prying eyes there.

Jonny boi sitting at his stupid little desk, listening to his stupid little tape recorder:

:0

[workplacecomedian]

Do you ever think about the fact Jon and Tim die together, and in the process Tim kills the man Jon was and replaces him with the monster he thought was already there.

[workplacecomedian]

Avatar of the Buried thats obsessed with the Falling Titan in a loving fearful and awe filled way, like those 'artist falling in love with their art' kind of dynamic. They feed the Choke by terrorizing hikers in old growth forests and burying them below (on inside?) massive trees like sequoias as a little treat for the Vast. Megalophobia seems like it could fall under both powers honestly, in the right context

[workplacecomedian]

Cant stop thinking about some kind of atla x tma au- at least to the extent of having modern element bending- and having martin be a waterbender. Yknow, the element assumed to be on the peaceful side compared to others, the Healer Element, etc etc. Except he's completely practiced in bloodbending, he just never lets that bit of info slip. Not much reason to under normal circumstances, especially since that kind of thing would probably be illegal

[workplacecomedian]

Need me a guy to match my freak (severe lack of communication)

[workplacecomedian]

Hey psst hey hey. Did you know that um. Daisy Tonner Jon Sims friendship. Did you know. They’re so friends. They’re friends they’re buddies and nothing bad happens to either of them ever at all

[workplacecomedian]

on one hand, i understand not being able to see the future and how confusing it'd be to change a main character's name on the fly and that it may well not have been That big of a deal for jonny to give john his own name. With That Said. can you imagine if they just had a scene or two where john tells the archival crew that he had a name change and it's just a vaguely trans coded short interaction. it'dve been so funny

[workplacecomedian]

Saw a post suggesting that putting characters into qprs should be called canoeing rather than shipping, and while that's very clever, it makes it REALLY tempting to give the archive gang qpr the shipname(? relationname?? ..dynameic) kayaking. Just straight up named, Kayaking. But it makes zero sense out of context. Sad

[workplacecomedian]

i like to think the archives has a shitty workplace kitchen with no counter space and a creaky folding table with two mismatched chairs and a fridge that always has jon’s lunch in it with a note that declares “tim: do not touch” that’s consistently half eaten (not by jon) by midday.