winterbears-things - Tumblr blog

[winterbears-things]

Am I really important in someone's life?

Tbh I really don't feel like that. Everyone has their own life okay I agree with that but that doesn't means I will be forgotten. I have to beg for bare minimums too. Should I live or just disappear from everyone's life ?

[winterbears-things]

Today I am remembering my old school days. It was really the best moment of my life. Missing those teachers who used to love me alot as supported me alot. I know it is just a memory now because after becoming a college student I realised in school the teachers used to be our 2nd mother but in college they are just professionals that's it. If I could time travel then I could really want to live my school life again and this time to the fullest with no regrets and all.

The adulthood is really bad and traumatizing.

[winterbears-things]

So if I stop reaching out for everyone they will forget me. Everyone has their special one in their life, I have too but sometimes it feels like I am all alone most of the time. He is ignoring as if I really don't exist in his life, and not only him but most of the people out there makes me feel a loner no matter what I do. It was really good to be an introvert as it was better than getting ignored by everyone. No one is there to reach me out that how am I, or am I really okay or not? Just it me and my loneliness. This world is really cruel for me.

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[winterbears-things]

There is an uneasy ness going inside me. I don't know what is it but I am getting a bad feeling already. I have took alot courage to date him. So if he decides to leave me or cheat on me surely I will die because my heart has became too much weak to this point that it gets suffocating to breathe sometimes and having health issues too. I love him to this point that I will forgive him if he does anything wrong except cheating on me. I m getting alot of trust issues too because most of the day he is busy and won't pick my calls and don't even reply to my messages. He doesn't have a idea what I go through everyday and he won't understand that too. I m too much hurt too but can't let him go. I just want him and I love him too much to this point that I can do anything for him.

[winterbears-things]

I feel like everyone has forgotten about me. I don't exist for anyone. If they need me they will text me other wise I m just a option in everyone's life. I really want to talk to someone so that I can explain what I am going through and how my overthinking is killing me, telling me to give up on everything. I am an understanding person that's why everyone expects me to understand everything they do even if it is hurting me as if I don't have any emotions. I m a listener too but there is nobody to listen what I m going through. No one has time for me just like the days are going on as if I don't exist. Why the people around me changes and hurts me always. But no one can understand what I go through everyday. What I m hiding behind my smile. Want to let go of all pain but can't because my mom won't have another daughter. Just surviving everyday and there is nothing to live.

[winterbears-things]

I belong from a place where no one understands me. There is none who could see why I am suffering. On Monday I got my periods but my boyfriend didn't even cared, I can understand that he is going through something too but I also need him to understand my side too, unfortunately he has been ignoring for few days atleast. I don't know what to do, can I get any suggestions please 🥺 from anybody. My parents priorities watching TV over my studies. Really good thing is happening around the me. Don't know what to do.

[winterbears-things]

when tae is literally 🥺🥺🥺

[winterbears-things]

So here I am again to write what I feel, even after knowing that no one cares about this anonymous person. I like to share it here because I am alone in this world even if I m surrounded by alot of people and it's quite okay for me too now. I wait for someone even after knowing that person is busy. I try my best in everything but why can't people see that. Efforts does matters but my mental breakdowns worsen the situations and I get hurt in the end. I get hurt by the slightest change in behaviour also. No one understands the person I am and I guess no one can expect Krishna. Traumas, bad luck in both friendship and relationship, depression, panic attacks, trust issues and mentally unstable with all these I try my best but get disappointed. Sometimes I really want to disappear from this place to the quiet one where no one knows me so that I can live peacefully. But I hope everything goes well in my life. All the best future you. ❤️

[winterbears-things]

I don't belong to this hookup generation. I really don't like how the physical touch is so much normalised now a days. I prefer the old school love. Gifting bouquets, handwritten lover letter, library dates , holding hands together , listening to music together and eye contactss. But this generation is more into hookups than eye contacts. I prefer to be the oldie rather than being cool. Sometimes I really want to have a time machine so that I can go back to that old days were eye contacts and getting blushed was cool, holding hand was an achievement, and in the end love was unconditional♡

[winterbears-things]

It is my fault. Again again and again can't they see the panic attacks I get because I talk to them. Just getting hurt for few words and i m being sorry but what about me, my panic attacks and the depression. Just want to escape this reality......!!! I JUST HATE THEM NOW!!!!!

[winterbears-things]

Life becoming worse and worse day by day. Feel like I was never meant for this world. I m trying my best and hardest to get results but the still becoming a failure. Most disappointed thing is i can't give my parents what they deserved except pain. I just cut my hands but there is no one to draw star over them. The person i neede most was there but not physically. I feel like dying is not the option but i can't take anymore. I m just becoming the villain of my parents story. </3

[winterbears-things]

It's my 1 year anniversary on Tumblr 🥳

[winterbears-things]

It's my 1 year anniversary on Tumblr 🥳

[winterbears-things]

In this world love is the most twisted curse......... because even if the person becomes your world, but can't become his world because his world is a different person 💔. I love him alot but can't confess, because I am scared of getting detached from him, I will love you in every way I can, let's see what destiny has prepared for me.... If you ever see this remember that my one sided love for you will never die.......♡

-사랑해요

-愛してます

-我爱你

[winterbears-things]

When I started to loved again, he is broking everything again. I don't feel like to love because of my family and him i am living. When everything starts to become perfect someone invades and destroys everything. Now he is questioning my love for, the love which I had for him is unexplainable and unrequited. I don't know when he will start questioning my life and then start to date another girl before leaving me and making my life miserable. I guess he will go away to even I m trying my best he questioned it. He does know what I have gone through but then also all these because of a third person 🥲. Atleast loving Taehyung never disappointed me. If he breaks everything i don't know what will I do. 🥲🥲 Already i m broken alot.

[winterbears-things]

I really want to say "I miss you" to the person I love most in this world. But he is far and far away from where I love. I could even touch him, kiss him, or hug him when I m sad.

[winterbears-things]

Why does love someone is so much difficult even knowing that they have a partner, still i had fallen in love with them. Just i am trying to focus on my life but these love issues are making me go through anxiety and depression. I guess I don't deserve to be loved that is the reason that I am all alone still now.