whyhii

[whyhii]

Sometimes, the pain of love is more fulfilling than the ache of loneliness.

[whyhii]

[whyhii]

Too many

I read a post recently that really moved me to the core. Im constantly having debates and arguements with people about feminism and why its still soo essential to rant about in todays times - thats what this post is about, for the most part, anyway. I felt that perhaps if i shared my story/ experiences as well it’ll give me some closure, and to people who still doubt in the neccesity of feminism, some thought.

1. After coming back from Christmas holiday we made a stop at one of my dads olds friends for a night or two. He is an alcoholic who is slowly killing himself. His wife has devorced him and he has nothing to live for except for maybe his son. (Note: he is like 63) He lives in a flat next to a house with a pool. The neighbours were nice enough to say we can swim there for the time being if we’d like, since its incredibly hot there. So naturally my sister and I took the opportunity of sun tanning and swimming. In a period of 48 hrs this alcoholic sexually assulted me probably 4/5 times. Without one of my parents noticing. Whenever I got in the pool, he’d suddenly decide to join, and conveniently “almost slip” everytime and grab a handful of my butt. Wherever I would swim, he would follow, watching my every move, grazing past my breasts very subtly, but enough for me to know its a lot more than an accident. I’d get out and sun tan, and he would follow and fall ontop of me to grab another handful of my ass. My sister is a witness to the act he put on to touch me at every chance he got. In the kitchen, when I’m making salad for the fam, his hand would wonder about up my thighs (god i feel sick typing this) I told my parents what happened, and luckily they said we never have to go back there.. I’m not one who likes conflict, so I left it at that, karma will get him I guess.

2. Two month later, February to be exact. We’re at my cousins wedding. My cousins new father in law made moves on just about everyone in the family, naturally including me, my sister, my aunt, and my mother. Throughout the evening we’re talking as a family when suddenly he looks at me with his drunken face and decides to hug me very inappropriately, his hands on my lower hips, pushing against me very tightly, the kind of hug you’d give a lover youve missed a lot. His hands wondered up my thigh and rubbed it, and he whispered in my ear that he really likes me a lot. The hug carried on WAY passed when a regular hug should. I pulled away and did my best to not make a scene AT A WEDDING for the rest of the night. Later, my dad caught him with his hand up my sisters thigh, rubbing and touching her very fucken inappropriately (with her in a very awkward position, not knowing what to do) may I add, SHE IS 14. After all this, he pulled my aunt aside at the wedding and asked her to sleep with him that night, and that shes an attractive woman blah blah blah. And the same to my mom, asking to have sex with her, telling her how attractive she is and how he had these needs for them to be together that night. To save my cousin and her new husband the embarrassment, we didnt make a scene right there.

3. A music festival. Thats it. Need i say more? Too many stories of rape at music festivals, too many stories of too much alcohol and guys thinking drunk girls mean its okay. Too many stories where the presence of countless drunk no’s were taken as synonyms for yes. Too many times where girls feel used and disgusting the next morning, too many times when you blame yourself for everything. Too many times victims have tried to reach out for help, but instead were belittled by people they’d notmally call their friends. Too many goddamn times.

Im not even mentioning the endless times Ive been catcalled or flirted inappropriately with by men I’ve never met before or shown an interest in. This is only the tip of the iceburg. Its sad to say that this has happened to too many other women aswell.

Too many.

[whyhii]

[whyhii]

I discovered an amazing editing app, so naturally i had to take my clothes off and put my phone on self timer.

[whyhii]

In a country well governed, poverty is something to be ashamed of. In a country badly governed, wealth is something to be ashamed of.

Confucius, Analects (via philosophybits)

[whyhii]

Damaged people are dangerous. They know how to make hell feel like home.

(via bubbaleft)

[whyhii]

[whyhii]

You know that tingly little feeling you get when you like someone? That’s common sense leaving your body.

[whyhii]

But honestly though, caramel corn, coconut and strawberry jam was kinda teally nice

highlights from jelly belly’s ‘literally eat shit, we hate you’ line of flavors

[whyhii]

I think my cat's curious sniffing nose is something the world should see and appreciate 💞

[whyhii]

I want to love her inside and out

[whyhii]

Happiness ❤

[whyhii]

Love this, so many night pass me by where i wish i had you to keep me company

[whyhii]

[whyhii]

[whyhii]