whitesnakewine
one thousand kabuto ship ten thousand headcanons
397 posts
+20🔞🐍🐦‍⬛🐍 orokabu/ kabukabu/ itakabu
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whitesnakewine · 8 minutes ago
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kb stoat/ferret from my prev hc ☃️
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whitesnakewine · 40 minutes ago
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itakabu and kabu meme ✍️
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whitesnakewine · 2 hours ago
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whitesnakewine · 3 hours ago
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thinking about orochimaru telling kabuto that what happened to him was because of konoha's betrayal and oro carefully lay out plan to destroy konoha and after killed hiruzen oro insist he will destroy konoha for good once his arms were heal and immediately after oro died the first thing kabuto did in oro's name is world domination
while sasuke called oro a bitch the entire 3 years and during the war he dgaf whats going on he just want that stupid village to blow up even after the 4th war end he still locked in like i get why sasuke was oro's star pupil
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whitesnakewine · 4 hours ago
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I actually completely forgot about Kabuto when i watched naruto back in 2006 or sth and i vividly remember oro's intro and was really invested in the chunin arc until i dropped bc of school then i pick up again during middle school to catch up jiraiya and itachi then they both died and oro died too so i dropped off again
it was until 3 months ago i went back to recap the entire timeline but only watched the part with Orochimaru in it i sort of notice theres this other guy who follow oro around and i vaguely keep track of him during this time and was dubiously cautious thinking he'd pull a starscream on oro but as the story process it dawns on me that he wasn't playing about being oro's righthand it was until the part when oro died and he reacted so strongly that i continue following him and was delight to see itachi again and oro again and the rest is history 🧍
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whitesnakewine · 4 hours ago
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they can never make me hate Orochimaru the way he done so much for konoha during his sanin years and summoned the last 4 kages to back up dance the 4th war and ok he murdered ONE special guy which none of us actually even like and he was old anyway and dissected a few villagers which im almost certain are scums the way absolutely no one seek oro for revenge he can do whatever he wants to that stupid village
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whitesnakewine · 5 hours ago
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whitesnakewine · 5 hours ago
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Should be at the club: Orochimaru
They're at the club bc they got dragged there but honestly rather be home as early as 6pm and sleep at 8pm: Kabuto, Kakashi, Yamato, Iruka, Itachi
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whitesnakewine · 7 hours ago
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I love taking my readers on a journey.
Where are we going? I dunno. How fast am I driving? Don't worry about it. Unlock the door? Just put your seatbelt on you'll be fine.
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whitesnakewine · 7 hours ago
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Hey my dear mutual! Another super stupid and weird request coming, so, please, feel totally free to ignore completely if you want, really. So, let's say instead of a criminal organization, the Akatsuki are actually a lab team. Which would be their roles, their work focus or their research topics? How would they behave at work with each other or, I don't know, whatever you can think of. Inspired by your agar plates post, by the way, hahahaha
Hello Sasuke, my dear. Don't call your asks weird, I love how creative they are! If anyone wants to write a fic about this please TAG me!
Big thanks to @the-real-sasuke-uchiha for requesting!
The Akatsuki in a modern research lab AU
Akatsuki Labs, Inc. No one knows what they're actually researching, and how they get their funding, however everyone hires them, they're incredibly popular with institutions and businesses alike...
Deidara is a lab rookie who is still at the beginning of his study. He went to a scientific high school and an absolute ace at chemistry. Besides studying chemistry, his other major is pyrotechnical engineering. He blows shit up on the regular and even adds copper sulphate to fires when he is the one supposed to put them out. He frequently steals minerals from the lab to use them for his pottery projects. And yes, he knows how to make meth.
Hidan is on his way to become a neurologist. He is fascinated by the way the nervous system works (especially while processing pain) and has the ego of a neurosurgeon twice his age. However he is regularly asked for a second opinion because he knows his shit. He's pretty popular with the ladies due to his confidence, however many of them are freaked out when they find out what a huge masochist he is.
I've never seen Itachi as a huge stem guy, but I've actually had a discussion about this with my dear moots @pet-plasma-bubble and @suki91 and came to the conclusion that he's either a plant biologist or studies medicine because he's one of these kids with a chronic and/or underdiagnosed illness going into medicine to make a change. Plant biologist!Itachi regularly talks to his plants when no one is looking and he gives them names as well. He doesn't really care much for the actual lab work and prefers to take care of the plants in the different lab greenhouses. Med student!Itachi is one of these anatomy girlies who draw their stuff in fancy colors and actually enjoy studying human anatomy.
Kakuzu is a senior scientist/professor who initially studied pharmacology/pharmacy to save many lives and prolong the lives of millions, but eventually got disillusioned and sold his soul to the pharma industry. He should technically be retired now, but he joined the Akatsuki labs inc to make some money on the side.
Kisame started out as a marine biologist specializing in shark research, however, seeing these beautiful, innocent creatures get bastardized by Hollywood and pollution made him apply to Akatsuki labs inc to help find solutions to the current crises caused by humanity. During his free time, he volunteers in a dolphin rehabilitation center.
Konan is the cofounder of Akatsuki labs inc, everyone respects her and even looks up to her. Once a brilliant scientist in the field of engineering, she got tired of how male dominated it was and how her male colleagues kept getting the credit for her ideas. She frequently holds lab courses for young girls interested going into the scientific field.
Nagato is the Akatsuki labs founder, and rarely seen in the lab. He has made himself a name in the field of robotics by inventing the Shurado robotics system which helps millions of automated machines run to this day. Rarely seen in the lab, he communicated with his employees via his Pain Alias Email. though to be fair, Konan writes most of these emails for him; she's the only one regularly talking to him face-to-face.
Orochimaru is a geneticist and biochemist, his focus being finding ways to avoid cellular decay, as well as the human genome and anti aging research. His parents are academics as well and he lived up to their expectations to the fullest. He has his own skincare formula which keeps him looking snatched at all times. Given the rumors about several scientific ethical code violations, everyone is kinda scared of him except for his personal lab tech, Kabuto.
Sasori is a renowed mortician who's also very interested in histology. His preparation techniques are unmatched and he even invented new preparation- and histological staining methods, which are called "Red Sand" and "Red Technique", respectively. He often gets into fights with Kakuzu about his microtome collection being unnecessarily expensive.
Tobi is the Akatsuki labs CEO cosplaying as a clueless intern that always steals from the candy bowl in the waiting room. In reality, he has a PHD in physics, his thesis being about rifts in space time and interdimensional interactions, however all of his papers are published under an alias. He has a soft spot for Deidara and refuses to fire him despite the latter's frequent "accidents".
Zetsu is a biological anthropologist fascinated by human evolution and human behavior. Some think even his colleagues are subjects of his studies. Some people say he's two-faced, but he is very chatty and inquisitive most of the time. He volunteered to have Itachi's venus fly traps in his office and can sometimes be seen feeding them dead flies or mosquitoes.
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whitesnakewine · 7 hours ago
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HI FREN!!! Am here to pick your big brain 🧠 🤗 I had a question about finances?! How much do you think ninjas make for being ninjas, by the time shippuden ends, and how much do you think Naruto as hokage makes 🤔 Sasuke as a missing nin has no money so how do they all pay for stuff?! Thank you for even reading this 🤗🤭🙂❤
*SIGH* Finances in the shinobi world... I have thought about this way too often. It should've been a way bigger part of Naruto's worldbuilding, considering the many money driven motvations we see in the story, but it sadly isn't. For the sake of this post I will convert everything into USD, but feel free to convert that into any currency of your choosing. This will be a mixture of canon and headcanon, you've been warned.
Money in the shinobi world
Let's see what the wiki has to say about money in the shinobi world first.
The ryō (両) is the currency used in the Naruto world. It is based on an old Japanese gold coin that was used in Japan before the Meiji period. It was later replaced by the yen. The exchange rate of 1 ryō is 10 yen. Although money isn't focused on much in the story, certain prices and sums of money have been mentioned. For example, Asuma Sarutobi had a bounty of 35,000,000 ryō (...) The Mujina Bandits made a demand to the Ikkyū Madoka, the daimyō of the Land of Fire, of a ransom of 500,000,000 ryō for the safe return of his son, Tentō Madoka, which Ikkyū had to make preparations to gather.
35,000,000 ryō are about $430,000 while 500,000,000 ryō are about $6.24 million.
Shinobi usually earn their money from completing missions. The rewards for these range from 5,000 ryō for a D-rank mission to more than 1,000,000 ryō for an S-rank mission.
5,000 ryō is about $60, while 1,000,000 ryō equate to about $12,400.
Currency
There are three types of currency in the shinobi world, one being copper coins, the other actual money bills and the last one being gold ingots. Copper coins are the most commonly spent currency, while ingots are the rarest. Bills start from 100 ryō ($1.25) and go up to 10,000 ryō ($125), while there are ingots from 10,000 to 1,000,000 ryō ($12,500).
Pricing
In Naruto Part 1, we see Naruto and Jiraya bump into a man who says his designer jacket is worth 10,000 ryō ($1250), to which Jiraya (who is loaded btw) says that designer jackets of that quality aren't usually "that" expensive. Aside from revealing designer brands exist in the shinobi world, it also implies that the pricing in Naruto isn't comparable to our world, since 1000 dollars for a designer jacket isn't outrageously expensive.
While hubs of economy, the ninja villages are mainly used to produce ninjas and economic growth is not their first priority. Most money is made (and exchanged) in the capital cities of the continent, which is where most of the rich and wealthy live.
I do think there is some basic universal healthcare in the hidden leaf village, however, long term/large scale treatments often have to be paid out of pocket. (ex. Mukai Kohinata, Shisui Uchiha)
Salaries
Given the large majority of missions go along the hokage village and a part of the money is taken by the village and the large position of power that the hokage position provides, it's reasonable to assume the hokage earns quite a lot. My estimate is about 100M ryō, which equates to $1.25M.
The average genin, assumed they do 4 D-Rank missions a week and pays an income tax of 20%, makes about $10,300 anually, most of which will be spent on ninja weapons and training equipment.
Aside from official missions, there are also ways to 'illegally' hire ninja, especially when talking about rogue ninja outside of the village. They are directly payed without paying taxes to their village. Aside from state sponsored killing, there are other missions to do, like transporting intel or other goods, which Sasuke most likely could've done during his time in exile, considering he traveled so much. People with ninja skills are a rarity outside of the ninja villages, so hiring a nukenin to do a job for you is a viable option, at least for more wealthy civilians.
When talking about Sasuke in Orochimaru's hideout, I think he gets an allowance from Oro as well as making money doing "illegal" missions. I think Orochimaru comes from a wealthy family and he makes a lot of money from his lab work and experiments. You can hire him/his men for intel gathering and experiments, as well as medical services if you're a nukenin. Out of the sannin, Oro is probably the richest of the three of them.
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whitesnakewine · 16 hours ago
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What I think is so crazy is that you can essentially immortalize yourself through writing. My fanfiction? It contains pieces of myself in it. The mannerisms of my characters, the random line about an allergy, or how they slice their sandwiches—it’s me. It’s all me. I am them and they are me and each and every one of my characters is a fragment of myself. I’ve never been truly whole when I’ve poured myself into everything that I’ve ever loved. All my characters, every facet and every detail. It’s all me. I love writing and it’s everything I’ve ever loved.
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whitesnakewine · 17 hours ago
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✍️ fixed kabu posture
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whitesnakewine · 17 hours ago
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whitesnakewine · 17 hours ago
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🍷 ❤️
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whitesnakewine · 21 hours ago
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au where chronical ill! itachi did get caught by oro and he was put under kabuto care
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whitesnakewine · 22 hours ago
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furry orokabu
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