whatislifebesidesrehearsal

[whatislifebesidesrehearsal]

Stage Tech: im so glad the program has the name of this song so i never have to listen to it again

[whatislifebesidesrehearsal]

Costume Designer: ill be in the audience so if you see someone run out in the middle just know i couldnt take the shoes any longer

[whatislifebesidesrehearsal]

Professor: i don't think anyone will be disappointed. I'll say that. ...Well, someone will be disappointed. There's always that one guy.

[whatislifebesidesrehearsal]

Prop Master: Don't Drop The Switchblades. they Will break. These are $100 a piece. [pause] also-theyre-illegal-in-[state]

[whatislifebesidesrehearsal]

House Manager: Hi are you here for [show]?

Audience: [noise of confusion]

HM: ....are you here for [unrelated thing]? that's around the corner to the left.

[whatislifebesidesrehearsal]

ASM 1: “Fiiiive kitchen rooooolls… six muhumuh— what the fuck is six?” *checks phone* “Double-D cups!” *rummages in a bag* “Well, we have four bras.”

ASM 2: “I mean, that’s eight cups. Like, each one has two cups.”

ASM 1: “That’s… not right but also not wrong. That kind of thinking will get you far in this industry.”

[whatislifebesidesrehearsal]

[Bad Romance starts playing during preshow, followed by copious giggling from the tech booth]

[whatislifebesidesrehearsal]

Designer: photo of very wonky model bookshelf

Des: Structural Integrity

[whatislifebesidesrehearsal]

Emcee: they also went to a small liberal arts college and that's where they met.

Panelist: im glad none of you clapped

[whatislifebesidesrehearsal]

Stage Manager, over headset: Could [Programmer] and [Master Electrician] please report to the tech table? [Tech Supervisor] has a list of OSHA violations with your names on it.

Programmer, to Master Electrician: It's sad that I can't even tell if she's joking anymore

.

[whatislifebesidesrehearsal]

Production Support: (photo of several foot wide patch of peeled off paint layers in the middle of the stage)

PS: Found some loose paint and started peeling. Oops

[whatislifebesidesrehearsal]

Production Manager: I need one more light out. [complete darkness] That's one too many.

[whatislifebesidesrehearsal]

Director, to Male Lead: Where were you? We waited for 2 minutes for you to get onstage!

Male Lead: Sorry, I was visiting [Male Stagehand].

Director: I need you in the auditorium at all times. You can’t keep playing Romeo and Juliet!

(I can’t do this justice it was so funny, the Male Lead and Male Stagehand even acted out a few seconds of the ‘balcony scene’ (Male Lead was Juliet))

[whatislifebesidesrehearsal]

Lighting Designer: Smoke machine’s on!

DSM: Are we isolated?

Lighting Designer: Think so, why?

*smoke alarm*

[whatislifebesidesrehearsal]

Director: You can’t die, your butt’s too big

[whatislifebesidesrehearsal]

Stage Manager: Could whoever is doing Duolingo stop or at least turn off the sound to pretend you’re paying attention until the end of notes?

[whatislifebesidesrehearsal]

Production Manager: the year before this they built a waterfall there and projected the logo onto it. The budgets were Pretty Good.