westminster-insider
The Westminster Insider.
165 posts
Because it's about time someone held the people of Westminster to account. We thought it might as well be us. Enjoy.(for fictional purposes only)
Don't wanna be here? Send us removal request.
westminster-insider · 4 months ago
Text
Reports are scattered because you know, in spite of this happening on the regular, authorities still can't get their shit together...but it sounds like the shooter (potentially multiple?) is still at large. Gunfire has now been reported in Knightsbridge. Yike. Bad: Central London is going to be gridlocked for hours. Good: maybe the workers at Harrods will have a bit of urgency for the first time in their lives.
3 notes · View notes
westminster-insider · 4 months ago
Text
Apparently there's been an incident near South Kensington tube station. Police are saying it was a shooting, but no details yet on whether or not whoever was playing Rambo is in custody. Avoid the area. Like, avoid it anyway because it's full of French people, but avoid it extra now, I guess.
4 notes · View notes
westminster-insider · 9 months ago
Text
I know people are bleeding or whatever, but I would note that 1) fashion, too, is a matter of life and death; and 2) these results make me want to join them.
BEST DRESSED MALE(S):
Varden Lefebvre (basic bitches, you're just simping)
Maksim Kurylenko (you all deserve everything that's happening to you rn for this)
BEST DRESSED FEMALE(S):
Leyla Yilmaz
Eleanor Shipley (yas queen)
BEST DATES:
Leyla Yilmaz & Laurent St. Pierre
Make sure to claim your prizes if you survive the night. Much love. ♥
9 notes · View notes
westminster-insider · 9 months ago
Text
I wasn’t nearly drunk enough for that, and I’m pretty fucking drunk. You people are animals. I hate it here.
6 notes · View notes
westminster-insider · 9 months ago
Text
How many French bros does it take to make a librarian cry?
...not the start of a joke, by the way. I'm just asking for science.
7 notes · View notes
westminster-insider · 9 months ago
Text
Was going to comment on how Cecelia's look is so done to death it's already introduced itself to 25% of the Hathaway siblings...but I can't stop looking at the husband. Quite an accessory. Try not to misplace him.
6 notes · View notes
westminster-insider · 9 months ago
Text
I spy two new engagement rings from Leyla and Adriana. Sus.
'I murdered your girlfriend.' 'No, I murdered YOUR girlfriend!' 'Yeah, well I'm engaged!' 'SO AM I!' 'SQUARE GO LIKE.'
Can someone just tell Aviv and Laurent to make out and get it over with?
7 notes · View notes
westminster-insider · 9 months ago
Text
Is someone going to tell Maksim Kurylenko he's at the London Awards, not his own gay wedding?
9 notes · View notes
westminster-insider · 9 months ago
Text
In our defence, we’d already sorted out the announcements. Sorry he’s dead or whatever.
10 notes · View notes
westminster-insider · 10 months ago
Text
Henry and Leyla imagining ‘what if’ a little too loudly. We can hear you, you know. Not to mention see the eye fucking. Gross.
7 notes · View notes
westminster-insider · 10 months ago
Text
Lyudmila Vorshevsky—wait, my bad, Korshunova, as somebody should remind her—and Eleanor Shipley for round two?
2 notes · View notes
westminster-insider · 10 months ago
Text
I won’t lie, it took a little longer than I expected for the first punches to be thrown. French on Russian violence drawing first blood won me a not insignificant bet tho, so thank you. Just know that you guys are getting slow in your old age…
3 notes · View notes
westminster-insider · 10 months ago
Text
DATE NUMBER 25 - Paris, France. Winning Bid: Oliver Parra with £50,000. Total Bids: 1.
"An apartment in Central Paris, overlooking the Eiffel Tower, with prosecco upon arrival. A day of leisure, followed by dinner at the Sphére, located on Rue La Boétie."
Partner: @msmelissalin Special prize upon arrival for Biggest Donation.
3 notes · View notes
westminster-insider · 10 months ago
Text
DATE NUMBER 24 - Hallstatt, Austria. Winning Bid: @konstantinvorshevsky with £35,000. Total Bids: 9.
"Austria. Visit the lakeside alpine village of Hallstatt in the Alps and enjoy a picnic lunch via boat ride. Attend an Austrian Apple Strudel Cooking Class in the afternoon before venturing to Salzburg to tour Hohensalzburg Fortress. Dine at the restaurant atop and attend a night-time concert there while taking in the balcony view of the historic town of Salzach below, including the river and mountains."
Partner: @eleanorxshipley
5 notes · View notes
westminster-insider · 10 months ago
Text
DATE NUMBER 23 - Sicily, Italy. Winning Bid: @franciscovidal with £31,000. Total Bids: 21.
"A visit to San Vito Lo Capo, Sicily, to embrace the beautiful beaches. An afternoon spent climbing the face of Monte Monaco, before winding down with a relaxing dinner in the town, with plenty of local wine to share."
Partner: @cassandra-acton Special prize upon arrival for Most Bids.
2 notes · View notes
westminster-insider · 10 months ago
Text
DATE NUMBER 22 - Monaco, France. Winning Bid: @varden-lefebvre with £30,000. Total Bids: 14.
"A long weekend in Monaco. Enjoy the comfort of the iconic Café de Paris, spending the afternoon pampered in its spa before heading to an opera. Michelin restaurants, beach sunsets, and ultimate luxury mark a perfect weekend."
Partner: @elainahalevyx
4 notes · View notes
westminster-insider · 10 months ago
Text
DATE NUMBER 21 - Moscow, Russia. Winning Bid: @anatolyveselov with £25,000. Total Bids: 8.
"A night out in Moscow. Italian food and French Champagne at Mario’s, followed by a ballet at the Bolshoi Theatre. Finish things off with a late-night stroll to St. Basil’s to take in the architectural beauty of the city."
Partner: @lararutherford
3 notes · View notes