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I hope your parents got you a tombstone for Christmas!

- Marv Murchins

I never made it to the 6th grade, kid. And it doesn't look like you're going to either.

- Harry Lime

Home Alone 2: Lost in New York

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Never forget.

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People were, for the most part, good at heart. But there was always a small and unfortunately productive contingency of the population that would use any excuse to be unmitigated arseholes.

True Love Bites by Joy Demorra

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Lady Riya hummed thoughtfully. “Well, if it keeps up, I highly recommend the infirmary down by the square. They might be able to help.” “Oh yes, what a wonderful idea.” Mrs. Collins brightened. “The Viscount has done wonderful work there. Hardly anyone dies anymore.” “A ringing endorsement to be sure, Mrs. Collins.”

True Love Bites by Joy Demorra

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“Listen, I think he likes you, and given how your previous encounters have gone, I don’t think it’s literally possible for you to fuck this up.” “That is both depressing and uplifting,” Oliver said. Gem grinned. “That’s my sweet spot.”

Passing Through Purgatory by Nik Knight

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“I’m worthy of love that’s freely given. Why would I settle for anything less?”

How to Survive a Summoning by Nik Knight

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It’s so funny to me when the water people in fantasy are all named after sea life. You know their kindergarten class had like four kids named Anemone and at least two Kelps.

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I only approve of food in the form of casserole.

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Haven’t we all been both Jonathan and Ethan at some point in our lives?

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chonky boy goes sledding

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“You know,” he added, “there are a number of recommended methods of dealing with ghosts— salt and iron, harmonic resonance, some people swear by exorcism, and not just priests— but that’s the first time I’ve seen anyone try a left hook.” “Now you say that,” Crane said, “it strikes me that it was a very stupid act.”

The Magpie Lord by KJ Charles

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Using the term "cronies" is a great way to out oneself as a conspiracy theorist.

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Y'all I'm crying. Why does it have nipples??

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