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[viouleta]

xosappho​:

✎ . . .

yuri has to think long and hard on this question, her silence becoming heavy as she becomes lost in thought. truth be told.... she hadn’t thought that far ahead. she was so preoccupied with figuring out a way to leave, she had no idea what she was gonna do once she did. her hobbies -- embroidery, piano, being an ornament -- were all given to her, rather than something she had naturally garnered a love for. “i don’t know,” she answers truthfully, tone somewhat melancholy, “but at least i would be free to actually figure out what it is i like to do. i could travel, experience new things and new people. i wouldn’t be told what to do and how to act anymore.” her voice is soft and wistful, like she’s just talking to herself rather than junjie now.

she straightens her posture a bit, suddenly feeling a little too vulnerable. “and what would you do?” there’s a smirk that appears on her face, her tone lighthearted, “bed as many women you can?” she jokes. “i can’t imagine what else a man would be interested in considering most of the other freedoms you’re already granted.” she tries not to sound too bitter, but she feels she can’t lie to junjie either. her mind travels back to the idea of marriage. “though i may hold grievances against my parents, i do wish i had the kind of marriage they had. from what i’ve seen and been told, they really were in love when they married. i don’t really know what happened along the way to change that. after all, my father had this fountain and garden made just for her.” she says, a slender hand gesturing to the romantic atmosphere around them, “but the servants tell me she hasn’t set foot here since before i was born.”

her eyes widen slightly, realizing she’s said too much, turning quickly to look at junjie, “i do hope you won’t repeat what i’ve just said.”

[viouleta]

xosappho​:

✎ . . .

yuri’s jaw goes slack, for once speechless by what he’s saying. her eyes quickly dart across the garden in search for anyone within earshot, before looking back at him, “i don’t-” she starts, but isn’t really sure what she can say in response to that. it was true that the last time her sister was receiving proposals, more men showed up with an interest in yuri. each time her sister would throw a fit, and soon yuri was sent to stay in the estate for the rest of the year. she wasn’t allowed to attend balls or grand events, for it would ‘distract the boys from the woman who is available’ and just wasn’t ‘fair to dear aeri, who’s trying her best to attract a good man.’

truthfully, it wasn’t like her sister didn’t attract suitors, but rather her mother was insistent that he had to be the perfect man, which was code for extraordinarily richer than they were. and her father followed everything her mother said, though he would never admit it out loud and if yuri were to ever point it out she was forced away in her room for a week.

yuri blinks, trying desperately to regain her composure, knowing that being silent only allowed for assumptions to be made. “i think my parents are making the decisions they think are the best for the family, and it would be foolish for me to question those decisions. they have the family’s best interests in mind.” she continues walking forward, walking under a green arch and emerging to the central attraction of the garden -- a fountain her father had installed for her mother when they first wed. large hedges and trees surrounded it, providing privacy from anyone outside the garden. two stone benches are fixed on opposite sides of the fountain, allowing admirers to sit and watch the water fixture from a safe distance without getting splashed. she sits down on a stone bench, watching the water for a few moments, “i’m sure you can understand how important it is to uphold your family’s wishes.” she says quietly.

[viouleta]

aisha ♡ la di da (200927)

[viouleta]

[viouleta]

xosappho​:

✎ . . .

the change in atmosphere between the two of them is very sudden, and yuri finds it odd. when he brings up keeping a secret, yuri nods, “well then i guess you’re lucky i don’t agree with that particular part of society.” she says, an understanding smile on her face, “i don’t believe it to be my place to speak on it, so i won’t.”

her eyes widen slightly at his words, feeling flustered once more by him. before she can think of a response, his next words sit heavy with her. “ah, i don’t know about that.” she lies, knowing very well that her parents wanted her to marry him, but between her sister’s failure to court and yuri’s resistance, this is what happened instead. she can’t help the small scowl on her face when her own inevitable marriage is brought up, “i’d rather it be later.” she mumbles, looking down and smoothing out her skirt. she twirls the loose bit of hair that escaped it’s pinning, “my sister’s... nice.” she offers, though she wasn’t sure if she really believed that. the kang sisters relationship had always been odd, and half the time yuri wasn’t sure if she actually liked her or was just forced to like her because of their ties by blood. “i think she’ll make a good, faithful wife.” she adds.

"at least, she wants to be. and she’ll always have my parents favor for that.” 

[viouleta]

xosappho​:

✎ . . .

yuri truly wishes she was anywhere but here, having to entertain a rake on such a beautiful morning. “well at least that makes two things we can agree on.” she says flatly, though the look on her face remains the same -- a pleasant smile. she turns to look away from him, instead focusing on the beautiful greenery around her. she has fond memories of this garden, frolicking throughout as a child with her older brother despite the servant’s pleas to watch the flowers. 

she turns to find his smile directed at her, and despite knowing it’s fake she finds her skin growing warm to the touch. she clears her throat and finds a rose in her palm. she glances down at it, instinctually bring the white flower to her nose to inhale the light, sweet scent that she loves. “right.” she says softly.

she delicately pops off the thorns of the rose, holding it by the stem to admire it, spinning it slowly. she looks up at junjie, debating on whether she should say something or if it’s even polite to bring it up; but it had been eating away at her since she learned about it, and she really did feel sad about it. “i’m sorry to hear about your mother.” she says softly, her tone genuine this time. she wishes to say more but knows she would be overstepping even more than she already had, so she leaves it at that. 

she walks over to one of the marble statues, placing the rose at it’s feet and stepping back to admire it. “we should only need to be seen conversing for a few more minutes.” she says, “then we may part ways and you will not have to endure my unruly attitude again.” 

[viouleta]

xosappho​:

✎ . . .

there’s a mixture of emotions that entangle in yuri’s chest, and none of them positive. she throws her hands in the air, unable to understand what just happened and why she had to open her big mouth once again. she pads to the kitchen slowly, dumping her tea and heading back upstairs to her bedroom. she’s not in the mood to be in the library anymore, even with his absence. she removes her robe, slipping under the covers but sleep does not come to her.

once the morning arrives, her maid rushes into her room to get her ready. she explains that her father has learned of what was said last night, and the feeling of dread from last night only seems to worsen when she realizes just how irate he’ll be with her. she tries to prolong her getting ready, but her maid has her dressed and ready within only a few moments. not much longer she stands in one of the living rooms, getting an earful from her father of how she embarrassed their guest, and how it’s her duty to fix what she had ruined.

“you will show him around the garden and apologize.” her father finishes and yuri’s eyes immediately widen, “father—!”

“you will not argue with me on this yuri. you will not have your way this time.” he booms, and yuri shrinks away, nodding her head meekly. she excuses herself, leaving when he shows no sign of responding.

if it wasn’t pinned up she'd be running her fingers through her hair like crazy. instead she opts for twirling a piece of hair that frames her face. she’s told that he’ll be brought by a servant to meet her in the gardens, and she can feel her face grow warmth in anticipation of the embarrassment she’s to feel. at the very least she has makeup applied, hiding the blush more than last night.

movement catches the corner of her eye and she looks up to immediately meet his gaze, which seems different from the night before. she sighs softly, glancing down at her gown to ensure it looks nice. she looks back up, giving junjie a polite curtsy, “i’ve been appointed by my father to show you through the gardens this morning.” she says softly, “i hope you’ll find it to your enjoyment.”

her chest rises and falls noticeably as she takes in a deep breath, “i would like to also apologize for my behavior last night. i was out of line, and i can assure it won’t happen again.” it takes quite a bit of restraint to not say it through gritted teeth, but she must put her pride aside if she wishes to not enrage her father further.

[viouleta]

xosappho​:

✎ . . .

yuri shakes her head. she’s angry with more than just him, and she knows this. she’s built up anger at this society built to uphold men at the top of the chain while women have to adhere to every rule they make, for fear of damnation. 

“i do not wish to know what men do.” she blushes fiercely, “i merely find it abhorrent that while my sister must wait around, getting her hopes up of becoming married one day, you will simply run around and do as you please, without a second thought for anyone else. what’s the point of you coming here? surely you can’t be that much of an idiot that you would tell her sister that you have no intention of marrying her when i could easily go and relay that message to my father?”

she freezes as he gets closer to her, but she refuses to cower in front of him, nose tilted upwards, “i don’t care what you do. i care for my sister, who has all the intention and hopes of marrying you, after our father insisted for years that he was simply ‘waiting for the right man.’” 

she turns to grab her teacup, which has undoubtedly gone cold from all the time passed, and accidentally bumps his shoulder with hers, “you may stay in the library if you’d like; i didn’t expect to sleep tonight anyway so i think now that i’d rather stare at the ceiling until dawn.”

[viouleta]

xosappho​:

✎ . . .

yuri is surprised at how easily he gives in, having been ready to argue or at the very least pull straws to see who would succeed. she opens her mouth to speak but clamps it shut when she notices his gaze lower, and the blush darkens. she turns to pick up her candlelight when his words cause her to freeze. she feels her face warm for another reason, immediately turning to face his back.

her stomach drops with the realization that if junjie is like this, there’s not a man out there who isn’t. she wishes to never be married, if that’s the only type of person she can call her husband. “a bar or a brothel?” she questions angrily, before scoffing, “i know i really shouldn’t expect much from a man, but the fact that you would have the nerve to speak like that in front of your betrothed-to-be’s sister is... incredible— if i could use one word for it.” 

she pushes her hair over her shoulder feeling warm and angry, “how lovely it must be to go out to a bar or brothel any time you want and...” she pauses, unsure of what word to use, “engage with some stranger you’ve only just met. no shame or sense of decency.” she’s speaking too much, but she does not care, feeling the need to protect her sister’s integrity. “do what you must but i won’t be telling your father anything.”

[viouleta]

https://www.instagram.com/p/CCBsBEvA28Q/?igshid=swvd9mge25ec

[viouleta]

xosappho​:

✎ . . .

she realizes the harshness in her tone and tries to reign it in a little bit. she shouldn’t be speaking to him that way. regardless of her own personal feelings, she shouldn’t make her family, specifically her sister, look bad.

she adjusts her robe, suddenly realizing how she’s dressed. she blushes deeply, her hair covering part of her face. she feels exposed in front of him like this. she huffs, trying not to show that she’s flustered. “it’s not that you’re not allowed to be in here,” she says quietly, “i’m just not used to anyone else being in here at this time.” she sets down her candlelight on a side table, arms gently crossing over herself, “i also don’t wish for the servants to misunderstand, or possibly speak about us being alone together. it wouldn’t be... proper.” she explains, quickly moving to close the door of the library. 

her eyes trail to his open chest, and she forces herself to look away. as if possible she feels her cheeks grow even warmer. “so i guess we have to decide who will have the library.” she says firmly, head tilting high as she refuses to seem nervous around him.

[viouleta]

@xosappho​

proposals, in yuri’s eyes, were just another way that a girl’s rights were taken from her. she and her sister would be given to the highest bidder at her father’s discretion, and the idea of it repulsed her. why was it her father’s right to determine her life and who she would spend it with? she was always vocally opposed to it, so much so that her parents grew angry and upset with her often. but she didn’t care, if she could prevent it from happening as much as she could. it would be okay so long as she were able to keep what little freedoms she already had. 

so when her sister was going to take her place this year, and willingly at that, yuri had been relieved.

until junjie walked through their front door, bouquet of flowers in hand.

yuri wanted to blame it on the corset squeezed tightly around her ribs, but she felt faint when she realized why he was there, watching her childhood crush waltz right over to her sister. by then, yuri had disconnected, unable to hear the words being being exchanged between her sister and junjie. as soon as would be deemed appropriate, yuri excused herself with feeling ill, shutting herself in her room the rest of the evening.

but now she tosses and turns in her bed, unable to sleep with all that is on her mind. she huffs, staring at the ceiling for a moment. she admits defeat against her anxiety, pulling herself from her bed and slipping on her robe and house slippers.

candlelight and cup of tea in hand, she quietly pads through the hallways of her family home, making her way to the library. her family library served as the place she would go when she couldn’t sleep, which was often. she hoped that the smell of books and warm chai would be enough to get her sleepy. maybe she’d get at least three hours of sleep tonight.

the library door is cracked open, a dull light pouring out onto the hallway and yuri’s head tilts. why would a servant be in there so late? but when she walks in, she nearly drops her cup of tea. “what are you doing in here?” she whispers harshly, staring at junjie coldly.