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her mind lives tidily, apart from cold and noise and pain, and bolts the door against her heart, out wailing in the rain

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love is tough, but loneliness is twice as hard

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Happy birthday, beautiful stranger.

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am I more than you bargained for yet?

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at parties i point to my body and say this is where love comes to die » Karen/Grant. An AU set in the Grantverse. Episode 190, Lick the Clock. “I was pretty sure I didn’t have breast cancer [...] but scared the shit out of myself for, like, a good fourteen days waiting to find out if I did or not.” Karen and Grant during this ordeal. (This is unfinished and might never be finished, but here it is.)

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Finally, a little bit of a Karen/Georgia fic.

This is for all the Karen/Georgia 'shippers who are lurking quietly. If you're there, this is part of a five times fic that it's taking me 8475 years to write.

the heart that's had enough stays shut

Karen/Georgia. Crossing lines, or the lack thereof.

---

They are in Karen’s hotel room after one of their first live shows. It’s all fresh and new and exciting. Karen is getting back into the groove of being on stage and Georgia is just learning the ropes, and they are practically buzzing with adrenaline after every show. 

This evening, they returned to Karen’s room late, laughing and singing and being silly. As soon as the door closes, Georgia backs Karen against a wall and catches her lips in a smudged kiss.

It’s euphoric and heady and as the air between them grows more fevered, Karen clutches Georgia’s lower back, desperately wanting to feel her closer. 

Abruptly, Georgia pulls away and drops to her knees, and Karen grapples for her shoulders immediately. 

“Wait, wait, no. Please. You shouldn’t–“ Karen says frantically. 

“It’s okay. I want to. I’ve wanted to for a long time.” Georgia’s hands travel slowly up under the hem of Karen’s black dress.

This isn’t new for them, but kissing and fingering is as far as it’s ever gone. That’s as far as Karen will allow it to go. She has morals, for Christ’s sake, flexible though they may be right now.

“No, no, I can’t– We can’t do this.” Karen is pushing at Georgia’s shoulder, keeping her other hand between them, trying like hell to keep that tenuous boundary in place. 

As much as she wants it, has wanted it for as long as they have been doing this, oral sex is crossing a line that she just isn’t comfortable crossing. It feels too much like cheating. She doesn’t want to do that to Vince, even if Georgia insists he won’t care. 

“Please?” Georgia asks, sitting back on her haunches. Nimble fingers run up the backs of Karen’s thighs, stroking with feather-light touches. 

Karen says nothing, just looks at Georgia for a long, quiet moment. Then she shakes her head and says, “I’m sorry, I can’t. I can’t let you do that to him–” 

They both know she’s talking about Vince. 

“He doesn’t care, I’ve told you that already, and–”

“I know, I know, but I just… It’s that thing of like, if we do that… It’s just the point of no return, it feels like. I’m sorry, but I can’t cross that line.” 

Georgia stands up and presses herself into Karen’s body, captures her lips in another searing kiss. She wastes no time finding and cupping the juncture of Karen’s thighs. It’s familiar territory by now.

“But this…” Georgia’s fingers slip down into the waistband of Karen’s panties and Karen can’t help but spread her legs a little, habit and instinct taking over. 

“This is still okay, right?” Georgia asks, cheek-to-cheek with Karen, mouth right by her ear.

Karen’s head tips back against the wall and she blows air slowly through her nose, trying to gather her resolve. It’s no easy feat because now Georgia’s fingers are slicking through her folds and it feels as amazing as it always does. She knows they should not be doing this, but she can never tell Georgia no. 

She needs to work on that.

“It shouldn’t be, but–” Karen’s words falter on a gasp when Georgia starts rubbing her clit determinedly.

“‘But’ what?” Georgia teases with a smile, pulling back to watch Karen’s face.

It took Georgia exactly no time at all to learn exactly how Karen liked to be kissed, and not long after that, she could bring Karen to orgasm with such ease that she almost didn’t believe it. Neither of them did. She’s been absurdly proud of herself since.

“But I–” Karen gasps and reaches down to lightly encircle Georgia’s wrist with her hand. She gives up trying to protest and grinds down into Georgia’s palm. It feels too fucking good.

Georgia’s fingers slip inside to explore and she sounds pleased with Karen’s faint gasp. 

“Fuck, you’re so wet,” Georgia says huskily. She captures Karen’s lips again and then mumbles against them, “It’s hot as fuck.”

“Jesus Christ,” is the only thing Karen can manage to say.

Georgia refocuses her attention on Karen’s clit and smiles brightly at the sight of Karen’s eyes fluttering closed. 

She asks knowingly, “Right there? Is that where you want me?”

An affirmative hum is all Karen can manage. Goddamn Georgia, anyway. It’s been years since someone has taken the time to learn her body so well. It feels too fucking good to say no.

“You’re sure I can’t eat you out right now?” Georgia asks. She always does this and it always sends Karen into a spiral.

Her eyes slide open, she finds Georgia’s gaze and holds it, shaking her head almost imperceptibly. She feels the orgasm building low in her belly. She grips Georgia’s wrist tighter and sucks in a breath.

“There we go,” Georgia says knowingly, recognizing the signs of Karen’s impending release. She can feel the muscles of Karen’s body becoming taut. It won’t be long now.

The finger on her clit flicks fast, hits a spot that causes an involuntary moan, and Karen’s knees go a little weak. Georgia presses into her, both of their bodies tense and trembling, sweat beading in the bends of their elbows and smalls of their backs.

“Are you close?” Georgia asks quietly. Her hand is getting tired and her arm is twisted at a weird angle, but she dares not stop.

Karen nods. “Yes. Yeah,” she breathes out. 

Then there is the white-hot snap of release and she comes with a moan, her head falling forward onto Georgia’s shoulder, gasping into the fevered skin of her neck. Georgia keeps working her clit and Karen uses the hand on Georgia’s wrist to adjust the pressure, blissfully riding out her orgasm.

As she comes down, she tips her head back against the wall and looks at Georgia with gratitude.

“Thank you,” Karen says sincerely.

Georgia slips her hand out from between Karen’s legs and nods. “I wish you would let me–”

Karen stops her with a shake of her head. “Georgia, don’t–” She shifts her eyes to the ceiling in resignation and exasperation.

Georgia puts her hands up and takes a step back. “Okay, okay,” she concedes. 

Karen takes a deep breath and releases it slowly, closing her eyes and counting to ten. 

One, two, three. 

She has to say no next time. 

Four, five, six. 

She knows it will be damn near impossible, but she has to. 

Seven, eight, nine. 

They can’t go on like this.

Ten.

When she opens her eyes, Georgia is gone.

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i threw stones at the stars, but the whole sky fell » Karen/Grant. Karen gets jealous (kinda). She and Grant explore their relationship in a new way. (Unfortunately, this is unfinished and might forever remain so, but I got sick of sitting on it. So, here it is in all its WIP glory. ♥)

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Happiness damn near destroys you, breaks your faith to pieces on the floor. So you tell yourself, that’s enough for now. But happiness has a violent roar.

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i'll dream each night of some version of you

that i might not have but i did not lose

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⁘

i've been awake in every state line

dying to make it last us a lifetime

trying to shake that it's all on an incline

⁘

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i knew i'd have a bad time shaking you

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i've got skin like birch bark / you can peel me off and lose me to the wind / i guess it's too late to protect myself from this you've been building these walls for a long time / it's not that i didn't know, but you'd flash me another smile / as you'd lay another stone / and i still fall for that / i still fall for that one every time tell me a joke or two, i could use one now

-chris pureka, driving north

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Fic Master Post

• if you were church, i'd get on my knees — rpf; Karen/Grant; rated E; “It’ll never happen again because I’m an emotional lighthouse on the very tip of Maine, and I’ll be there forever.” -Karen Kilgariff → So this is the one that started it all. I got this flash in my head of the scene where Grant sees Karen in the hotel lobby and it spiraled from there. I have a lot more of them written than I will probably ever get posted. I think of this one as the beginning.

• somehow escape the burning wait — rpf; Karen/Grant; rated E; Karen and Grant making it work long distance. → I have a whole narrative in my head of how they would make things work between meeting and getting to live in the same city. There would be long months of enduring the distance. I imagine visits would be a rarity for them.

• i love you better when you're wild — rpf; Karen/Grant; rated E; Karen and Grant. Backstage fooling around. → I enjoy imagining them at live shows, as it would undoubtedly be a big part of their lives. I also like to think that Grant brings something out in Karen that she might not have found in herself otherwise.

• i threw stones at the stars, but the whole sky fell — rpf; Karen/Grant; rated E; Karen and Grant. Karen gets jealous (kinda). Things get interesting. → Karen Kilgariff is a babe but she doesn't seem to realize it. Grant is fine with trying to make her understand that. Forever.

• at parties i point to my body and say this is where love comes to die — rpf; Karen/Grant; rated E; Karen and Grant. An AU set in the Grantverse. Episode 190, Lick the Clock. “I was pretty sure I didn’t have breast cancer [...] but scared the shit out of myself for, like, a good fourteen days waiting to find out if I did or not.” Karen and Grant during this ordeal.

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MSR Fic Tropes

Scully is The Ice Queen

Mulder was hated even in the VCU (in canon it wasn't until he rooted himself in the basement.)

Scully is shocked anyone thinks she's beautiful because Melissa was always "prettier."

Mulder married and divorced someone before his relationship to Diana (or concurrent to their early partnership.)

Scully is a bad cook (in canon she baked the Christmas dinner in One Breath, which Maggie complimented her on-- "delicious as always".)

Mulder was beaten as a kid by his abusive father (which I would argue is not canon-- slapping, yes, spanking, yes. Assault? No.)

Scully always "sighs, letting her eyes slip closed."

Mulder HATES hospitals: he is always allergic to the first pain killer he is given, always has a hidden secondary injury that is worse than the original one, and is always uncooperative and sabotaging to medical staff in his petulance. (In canon he's very pleasant to hospital staff-- Folie a Deux, Kill Switch, Signs and Wonders-- and only lashes out when he's panicked about Scully-- One Breath, Memento Mori, Redux, etc.)

Scully refuses to tell Mulder "I love you" or commit to anything other than a casual relationship because she's a commitment-phobe (in canon, she starts the family planning discussion in Home and the motel cheese reception in Detour, and the "get out of the car" in Dreamland, etc.)

Mulder had a childhood dog growing up, or Samantha had a cat.

Scully's Katherine comes from her grandmother or great aunt.

Mulder would have become a child psychologist if he didn't go into the FBI.

Scully frequently has body dysmorphia or self-esteem issues.

Mulder is described as a puppy (no joke, I've been collecting every time he's referred to as puppy in fic... it's 17 pages long. Doesn't seem a lot... but it's a lot.)

Scully whispers. About. Everything. (I've also been collecting sentences in fic when Scully has whispered something... it's 113 pages long. And growing. Look for whispers-- you'll never unsee it.)

They leave notes in the office for each other signed with -S. or -M.

Mulder dog sat Queequeg at least once.

Mulder constantly gets caught up in VCU/BSU cases, losing himself in the process and almost committing suicide constantly (in canon, the first time he tried that-- the Bill Patterson method-- was in Grotesque; and he seemingly hasn't since. In fact, he highly discourages others from delving too deep and losing themselves in madness by doing so.)

Scully and Mulder cry over songs about each other frequently.

Scully is justified in toying with Mulder's emotions by dating someone else to bait him but if Mulder does it then she cuts him out of her life (he usually doesn't because he's just so distraught with emotions for his Scully.)

Mulder's cologne is always spicy and his aftershave is always fresh.

Scully's shampoos smells like strawberries. Or peach.

Mulder has amazing cholesterol despite his garbage diet.

If they have a tryst before canonical dating and Scully ends up pregnant, she will never communicate this to Mulder-- he will only find out years later when he runs across her and sees their child. This is always somehow his fault, of course.

If Mulder and Scully get together and get pregnant before canon, their first child is always a girl. She is named after Melissa, Samantha, or another woman from Scully's family.

If the pregnancy is somehow connected to the mytharc, it will usually always be twins or triplets (once it was two bio twins and one miscarried other, but that was a surrogate story.)

AU S9 fics: in older fics, Scully became a stay-at-home mom. In newer fics, Mulder became a stay-at-home dad. Rarely do they go back to the FBI together, even if Mulder got the X-Files back.

Mulder starts cooking and gardening at the Unremarkable House.

Scully likes aging and Mulder does not.

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These perfect humans.

(screencap source)

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💛🧡💚

I love this so much

💚🧡💛

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Melissa Scully loved Stevie Nicks and Fleetwood Mac. Pass it on.