vaxyl

[vaxyl]

Chapter 2 of "The Cost Of One Soul" is out now on AO3!

[vaxyl]

[vaxyl]

My ability to write lately has been really inconsistent, but I'm trying to write whenever I am able to.

Here are the past 2 weeks' stats;

Now let's break it down -

CANCELLED;

"Rush" - a Formula 1 inspired fic with Vox Machina, The Mighty Nein, The Crown Keepers and Bells Hells as pro racing drivers. Reason for Cancellation? It's hard to write, and I lost the motivation for it. I'm not too upset about it going nowhere, to be honest.

NEW;

"Poisoned Petals" - a Heaven Official's Blessing crossover featuring Vax & Vex being adopted by Xie Lian and San Lang; Dealing with child abuse, stalkers, vampires, transphobia, homophobia, grief, falling in love, therapy and found family. Vax & Vex go by different names to fit the setting, as do other Critical Role characters who appear.

Chapter 9 of "Separation Burns" - an alternative universe where the twins accidentally went separate ways at a young age after leaving Syngorn forms a rift between the pair.

Attempt 4 at Chapter 2 of "Not My Mark" - an alternate universe exploring A/B/O mechanics where Vax is an omega and ends up carrying Sylas' spawn after he's caught by the Briarwoods in their guest room at Emon Castle.

CONTINUED;

"Growing Pains" - an alternate universe where Vox Machina learned of the Briarwoods' cult immediately after Whitestone, and while trying to dismantle it Vax gets turned into an infant and must grow up again.

"Truth Unclasped" - another alternate universe, this having Vax's secret deal with The Clasp, made to protect Vex, brought to light when Vox Machina run into The Clasp while scouting out a ruined Emon City in the run up to their big fight with Thordak.

Chapter 2 of "The Cost of One Soul" - an alternative universe where the ritual to save Percy's life in Season 3 Episode 12 goes awry when Orthax is able to get his claws into Vax's soul.

* Week One of Perc'ildan Week 2025 (Orthax!Percy + Treating Wounds) - an alternative end to Vox Machina fighting the Briarwoods under Whitestone.

"Kal's New Home" - a completely original work of fantasy about a newly orphaned magical bird.

* While I have started writing for Perc'ildan Week and have ideas for each week, I cannot say for certain that I will finish them.

I attempted to take part last year but had mental health troubles that saw me start but never finish the stories I wanted to write. *

LIVE STORIES;

The following stories can be read so far over here on AO3;

Separation Burns - https://archiveofourown.org/works/44830597

Not My Mark - https://archiveofourown.org/works/62872828

The Cost of One Soul - https://archiveofourown.org/works/60076099

[vaxyl]

🪷🗡🪷🗡🪷🗡🪷🗡🪷

🪷🗡🪷🗡🪷🗡🪷🗡🪷

I absolutely adore Xie Lian from Heaven Official's Blessing...

Binge watched the show twice, on Friday through Saturday and last night through this morning, and I already want to binge watch it all over again lmao. I may or may not have a little problem.

Can't remember when I first found it, but it's been in my top 3 favourite shows ever since.

Honestly, I got some fic ideas, too, but my last ones for Heaven Official's Blessing went nowhere fast, so idk if I'll write these ones.

[vaxyl]

After what has felt like a decade to me, I have finished chapter 8 of Separation Burns at last!

Check it out here on AO3!

https://archiveofourown.org/works/44830597/chapters/165516025

Please heed the warnings and enjoy! This is a longer one!

[vaxyl]

Thinking about the son of a seamstress growing up to manipulate the threads of fate and becoming a guardian of the tapestry those threads become.

Unintentional poetry that wasn't meant to happen but, on the roll of some dice, became a very important part of Exandria.

Gods, I adore Vax'ildan's story.

[vaxyl]

OH

can Percy fight?

[PERC'ILDAN]

i'm rewatching 911 (again) and oh well i do have THIS AU

[vaxyl]

HAPPY TRANS DAY OF VISIBILITY! 🏳️‍⚧️💕

A quick drawing of Vax'ildan for Trans Day of Visibility!

I am Trans Masc Nonbinary and I headcanon that Vax is too!

[vaxyl]

PERC'ILDAN WEEK 2025

Perc'ildan Week is an event created in order to celebrate Percy de Rolo x Vax'ildan ship from the first campaign of Critical Role and The Legend of Vox Machina. This year it will take place from the 21 of July 2025 to 27 of July 2025.

You can find themes, rules and important information below the cut

MONDAY, 21.07: TREATING WOUNDS | DEATH&REBIRTH | ORTHAX!PERCY TUESDAY, 22.07: RELIGION | TOUCHSTARVED | LOVE CONFESSIONS WEDNESDAY, 23.07: WHUMP | SUPERNATURAL CREATURES | CELEBRATIONS THURSDAY, 24.07: ARRANGED MARRIAGE | MUSIC&DANCE | HUGS FRIDAY, 25.07: FAMILY | POST CAMPAIGN | SECRET SATURDAY, 26.07: SOULMATE AU | WINGS | FLOWERS SUNDAY, 27.07: BODY WORSHIP | GENDERSWAP | DESTINY BONUS THEMES: MUTUAL PINING | ALTERNATIVE FIRST MEETING | QUIET NIGHTS

Our official tag is #percildanweek and account is @percildanweek

RULES

You can choose from 1 up to 3 themes for each day and include one, two or all three of the themes in your work.

Any form of fanwork (art, fanfiction, edits, cosplay, fanmix, etc.) are allowed and welcome

The week is focused on Perc'ildan (Percy de Rolo x Vax'ildan). Other characters and ships that does not include Percy or Vax are permitted but keep in mind the main focus of the week. Shipping Percy or/and Vax with other characters is strictly prohibited and not allowed.

Suggestive content and full nsft is allowed but must have appropriate tags and warnings to keep every Perc'ildan fan comfortable. Those works will be reblogged and tagged with a #nsft tag

Dead Dove Do Not Eat content is allowed but must be tagged and trigger warnings should be put on the post and/or in the tags. Those works will be reblogged and tagged with a #dead dove tag

If you see dead dove or nsft reblog missing a tag notify us by sending an ask or a direct message, please (we are, in fact, one person and, well, just a person)

We will continue reblogging your posts even after the week will be over so don't be afraid to post your work not during the themes day or the week -- better late than never!

And the most important: be kind to each other 🖤💙

Tag your works with #percildanweek or mention our account directly and we will reblog you!

If you have any questions our ask box and DM are always open

[vaxyl]

Get in line, Bryann...

He probably tastes as sweet as a cupcake, let's be honest. 😅🫣

Also;

MOOD

Here's a happy little Vax'ildan!

And yes, Gilmore kissed him!

🏳️‍🌈 😊 💕

[vaxyl]

Here's a happy little Vax'ildan!

And yes, Gilmore kissed him!

🏳️‍🌈 😊 💕

[vaxyl]

[vaxyl]

After having a really rough night, called my boyfriend Shaun and he talked to me until I passed out.

Something he said stuck with me though; "You know, Vax'ildan would stab your ocd for you if it were physically possible to do."

I was too out of it last night to truly appreciate it, laughing a bit at the time and quickly moving past it, but now I'm awake and my brain is far less scrambled...

It's really fucking funny. And cute.

Now I can just picture Vax angrily swinging his dagger at thin air and yelling at someone's ocd to "fuck off already, you bastard!"

And yeah, I didn't know I needed that image but I really, really did.

Thank you, Shaun! 😊 💕

[vaxyl]

Can my anxiety and intrusive thoughts leave me alone, I'm already dreading starting a new medication next Monday as it is.

GODS

All I want to do is write, play video games and hang out with my cule goddds fucking damnit.

[vaxyl]

Hey can you share some of your Vax headcannons? What happened when he was seven in the mill? He died and came back to life?

Ooo! I love talking about my Vax headcanons, of course friend!

Gonna give you 5 of my favourite, though warning they get angsty!

[ Content warnings for talk of child death, transphobia, stilbirth, and a bit of fantasy racism.]

1) I headcanon that the reason why Vax'ildan is Fate Touched is because when Elaina was pregnant, she originally was only with one child - Vex'ahlia - but she was almost killed in an incident that deviated from her intended Fate, so Purvan Suul came to investigate things and seeing how young and scared Elaina was he had to heal her. (*1)

Unknown to Purvan though, Vex's soul had shattered when Elaina almost died and by healing Elaina he unwittingly healed Vex's soul... But some parts didn't remerge with the complete soul and, over time, a second soul formed.

This soul would go on to become Vax'ildan, who technically has 2 dads as a result of this mishap; His shitty biological dad, Syldor, and his divine dad, Purvan - tho cause Purvan isn't his biological dad and isn't a god, maybe more demigod adjacent, Vax isn't an aassimar but could feasibly be a divine soul sorcerer instead.

A good portion of Vax's soul is made up of divine magic granted by The Matron as a result of the healing mishap, granting Vax his ability to alter the Threads of Fate to a degree, while the rest of Vax's soul is made up of the broken remnants of Vex's soul.

Vax's soul technically being an extension of Vex's soul means that they are tied to each other and can feel each other's pain, they can share dreams if they both sleep at the same time and they can hear each other's thoughts in moments of stress, pain, panic, anger or dying.

When Vex dies in Purvan's tomb and The Matron takes Vax as her initially unwitting and unwilling new champion, she cuts their souls in half which separates them and causes these shared feelings and dreams to stop.

2) I headcanon that Vax'ildan is trans, with Vax specifically being trans masc nonbinary like me.

I initially only began writing for this idea while trying to find a label for myself, projecting on Vax as I related a lot to him.

But over time, I genuinely began to imagine him as trans like me, and began exploring my fears, dysphoria and trauma through him - his father being the perfect avatar for all of the hate & disgust I've received for being nonbinary.

I imagine he never felt "like a girl" and didn't really understand what gender was due to growing up in poverty and having no proper education until he was 10 years old, but by then everyone had already labelled him as a girl.

And in Syngorn, the elves are very disgusted by the concept of transness due to mistranslated scripture about The Archeart (who I see as trans itself), so Vax realising he's nonbinary at 13 and trying to explore it goes poorly. (*2)

Vex is taught to shun Vax after he comes out, their father furious at the idea, but Vex feels guilty for it and slowly warms up to Vax's new identity despite her father's attempts to separate the pair.

When they finally run away and escape Syngorn, Vax fully adopts his new name and pronouns with Vex struggling to adapt at first but eventually getting the hang of it over a few years - she also gets very defensive of her brother.

I imagine Vax gets top surgery, like I hope to get some day, and he starts wearing clothes that are considered more masculine by society while still keeping his hair long and still wearing makeup.

He also tried to deepen his voice naturally, but struggled to pass this way - until one day he and Vex save a shopkeeper under attack from bandits while they travel home to Emon City from Westruun Village, and the very grateful shopkeeper reveals that he's an enchanter and creates a magical choker for Vax that lets him alter his voice as he pleases.

This shopkeeper is the glorious Shaun Gilmore, of course, and he's flirting with a very bashful Vax from the second the fight is over until the 3 part ways again. (*3)

The choker becomes a very, very important item to Vax over time.

3) I headcanon that Vax'ildan and Vex'ahlia are both Autistic with ADHD and OCD, and yeah, this is me projecting again, lmao.

Vax's traits are more obvious and his struggles are more severe, but Vex struggles a lot as well.

They both have sensitive eyes and ears due to being half-elves, but Vex's hearing is even more sensitive than Vax's while Vax has much more sensitive eyes.

They both struggle with eye contact and social cues, though Vax struggles with them more.

And while Vex is a fast thinker and quickly solves basic patterns and problems, Vax is a slower thinker who can solve more complex patterns and problems.

Vax also deals with pretty severe dyslexia and dyscalculia, but Vex doesn't experience them at all.

They also both experience quite intense intrusive thoughts and compulsions that make daily life difficult, but Vex copes with her's better than Vax copes with his.

When Vex's intrusive thoughts or compulsions get bad, she goes through her ledger and recounts all of Vox Machina's gold - while Vax has more unhealthy coping mechanisms, but he's started to braid his and other's hair as an alternative in his journey to heal.

They also both drink copious amounts of caffeine because it quietens and slows down their brains for a period of time, but Vax prefers sweet drinks like flavoured teas, flavoured coffees and hot chocolate, but Vex is more keen on bitter black coffee and plain old milky tea instead.

And both have a safe food in plain, hot buttered bread - Vax's other safe foods are gummy sweets, dark chocolate and blueberries, while Vex's are apples, cheese & crackers and raisins coated in milk chocolate.

Milk is also their safe drink, with both twins HATING water - but they both love bubbly drinks.

Vax's special interests are blades, hair styling, coins, baking, sewing and magic tricks, while Vex's special interests are animals, plants, flying and archery.

4) Vax'ildan is Rudiusborn, but Vex'ahlia isn't Rudiusborn.

Another strange factor in why Vax is the way he is - he was born during a Rudius Flare Event.

Vex was born first on the 17th of Sydenstar at roughly 2 minutes before midnight in 784PD, the sky calm and dark, but she was stilborn and couldn't be saved.

Then, everyone unaware there was a second child at all, the clock strikes midnight and a Rudius Flare Event begins.

Roughly 3 minutes later, now on the 18th of Sydenstar, Vax'ildan is born screaming the walls down.

Then the RFE stops as soon as his umbilical cord is cut and, with the croak of a raven, little Vex magically wakes up - this being the very first sign of Vax being Fate Touched and intricately tied to The Matron of Ravens.

While Vax is Rudiusborn, he doesn't seem to have powers but he does have the constant awful nightmares that Rudiusborn tend to have, as well as bad migraines.

Maybe he does have the powers, but just never unlocked them?

5) Last but certainly not least.

The headcanon that you asked about... Vax'ildan dying as a kid.

I have thought about this one so much that it's kind of concerning, but that's mostly because it started as a nightmare that I had about 2 to 3 years ago now.

Basically, I headcanon that the twins were born with no elven features and that for the first 7 years of their lives, they looked and functioned like humans.

But at around 4 months before they turned 8, they started to develop more elven features.

Their ears started to grow into small, dull points at night - the pain waking them up crying - and their eyes developed protective membrane sacks full of some type of thin clear liquid which grants them night vision.

Inside this liquid are small metal fragments that don't harm their eyes or impact their vision, these being called Fey Flecks. They glow in the dark and come in 4 different types of metal; gold, silver, bronze, and copper.

Vax'ildan has bright amber eyes with gold Fey Flecks, while Vex has dark copper eyes with lighter copper Fey Flecks. Vax also has longer ears than Vex, by an inch, but her ears are pointier than his.

People were shocked by this as Elaina had said the father was a human like herself, and rumours started to spread around the small village like wildfire.

In time, the suspicion about who the father was led to an elven man with a wife and kids being ran out of town by said wife.

This brought hatred down on Elaina and the twins, resulting in some of the older kids mimicking their parents and bullying the twins with cruel taunts & pranks.

Vax had looked a little too much like the man ran out of town, despite the man's innocence, and Elaina was labelled as a nasty homewrecker despite insisting the father was somebody else.

Vax has fair white skin and silky black hair like the elven man had, while Vex has her mother's warm brown skin and curly brown hair.

The twins are mocked, pushed around, laughed at and even start being called slurs targeted at their mixed heritage in time.

Vax is targeted the most due to his resemblance to the elven man, but both get it quite bad.

It ultimately cultivates into a tragic accident where Vax is found by bullies while he, Vex and their few friends played hide and seek out in the abandoned fields down south of the village.

He would be chased by these older kids, before he trips on something on the ground.

He would start to get back up when he's suddenly surrounded by these bullies who push him at each other and tease him.

Vax tries to break free, but gets shoved to the ground - only, the ground is made of rotten wooden boards hidden under tarp thats been covered in dirt over years.

The boards give way under the force of Vax being shoved down onto them, and poor Vax falls down into a long forgotten about mine shaft, not surving the fall.

Vex feels it immediately and her scream alerts her friends as she starts having what feels like a heart attack, her body being pulled towards her brother's.

Her friends follow her as she staggers over to where the bullies stand in horror around the hole in the ground that had quite literally swallowed Vax'ildan whole.

Someone runs to get help as the kids, even the bullies, try to help.

The older kids find rope and start preparing to climb down, while the younger kids try to console Vex and calm her heart down.

By the time the adults arrive, Vex has gone catatonic and the kids have failed to secure the rope.

Elaina's best friend, a lumberjack, is able to secure the rope and goes down to rescue Vax while Elaina and a cleric tend to Vex.

The kids are asked what had happened, and one of the bullies can't take the guilt, coming clean about what they had been doing.

Vax is retrieved, but it's too late.

Elaina begs the clerics to help him, but is warned they may not be able to bring the child back.

They try to Revivfy him anyway, and at first nothing happens...

Elaina is heartbroken, hugging a mute and unmoving Vex as she begs Vax to wake up for them, and then Vax does wake up.

But it's not the clerics' work.

The Matron has brought him back as his Fate is incomplete.

Vax wakes up with no memory of the fall, but he has a curl of while hair at his right temple now and his lower right leg is broken beyond even magical repair.

He's healed up and rushed to the only temple in Byroden for an emergency amputation and a thorough check up, while Vex slowly comes back to herself as her and Elaina wait to see Vax.

Now Vax matches Vex, who has a curl of white hair at her left temple from being stilborn.

It takes almost a year, but Vax does learn to walk again with a wooden prosthetic leg, as well as love and support from his mum and his twin sister - that, and the bullying finally stops after the fall.

But he's never quite the same, being quieter than usual and experiencing periods of deep sadness and exhaustion.

It wouldn't be until he's an adult that he fully recovers from the nightmares of dying and his fear of heights, his pact with The Matron of Ravens helping him.

Some notes under the cut!

(Spoilers for EXU: Divergence)

(*1) - Purvan sees Emhira, the little girl he raised into an adult and helped prepare for her duties as the avatar or The Matron of Ravens... And Elaina looks a lot like Emhira had at Elaina's age.

He isn't supposed to heal Elaina, her thread has changed and this is her new destiny, but all he can see is the girl he protected all those years ago pre-Divergence.

Everything that follows is Fate's way of setting things straight.

(*2) - Canonically, elves can and do change their gender at will thanks to their fey magic, gifted to them by The Archeart.

But I headcanon that Syngorn are a very proud and prickly people who believe they were designed as they are for a reason so they forbid the use of this gender altering magic and shun those who explore their gender identity.

(*3) - I have always headcanoned that the twins met Gilmore first, them befriending him before Vox Machina was ever formed.

I imagine Gilmore was probably one of the first to immediately adapt to the pronouns Vax asks to be called, this is because I headcanon Gilmore as being genderfluid or even pangender.

Gilmore doesn't experience dysphoria, but understands why it would make life difficult so he makes Vax a Choker of The Mockingbird - Mockingbird being a spell that lets you mimic voices you've heard at least once before - with a modification that lets Vax alter his voice to sound exactly like how he wants it to sound.

[vaxyl]

😭

It's been a long, long time

since I've seen my face in your eyes

[vaxyl]

Sorry for double posting but APPARENTLY those commission scammers have showed up on Tumblr at least for the first time for me.

For those who don’t know what I am talking about, there were/are commission scams going on in Instagram and even places like Artstation where people would pretend to be interested in your work and try to commission a pet or portrait for the sake of trying to get your bank details. Here’s how to (somewhat) sniff them out:

1- They don’t seem to be an average customer/ person that would be involved in your fandom, or has a blank template for an account or don’t even follow you.

2- They ask you to draw a portrait or a pet picture either for themselves or their children/family.

3- They promise to overpay you (in the hundreds) and do not listen to you even if you firmly state the price is cheaper.

4- They are constantly asking for your email name, or private details regarding things like banking details or passwords or other private information others should not know.

5- They try and over reassure you they mean no harm, try to guilt you into giving them the info, or become aggressive over you not giving them what they want.

What should you do if you come across one of these guys? My best advice is to block and report. Sadly these people jump account to account so there isn’t really much to do other than spread this info to prevent artists from being scammed.