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I feel like I’m sucking on a PowerBank…

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The Four Commandments of Watching an ‘A Nightmare On Elm Street’ Movie

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Actually Supernatural Freddy Kreuger HCs:

• OK OK HEAR ME OUT: Burning Plant Zombie Freddy.

• imagine opening on someone running in the dark, and following behind them is a burned corpse being carried around by black, thorny vines.

It’s eyes do not blink.

It’s mouth does not move.

The ghostly voice comes from everywhere and nowhere.

“You can run, but you can’t hide…”

And the vines eventually approach and consume the dreamer, and pulls them within.

The corpse opens it’s eyes.

Title card.

• Eventually the whole story is him leading Nancy to his real body, hidden within a huge twisting bundle of thorny plants.

• I imagine this Freddy having his ‘Demon mode’, which is the Burned Corpse within a bush of thorns, but at the end, for his final transformation, the burns fade, and the plants around him become more green. I can VIVIDLY picture him sort of ‘waking up’, and cutting his way from out of the greenery.

• I can picture him having quips about plants, and a lot of the dreamscapes being outdoors where his victims wander into the poisonous or otherwise trapping plants.

I can imagine a death by a Giant Pitcher Plant, (‘How’s this for a wet dream?’), maybe a body horror skin infection death from Poisonous Ivy, etc.)

• Having the imagery in the dreamscapes also be plants that promote sleep like Lavender and Mugwort.

• In Conclusion: PLANT DEMON FREDDY.

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JEH Freddy was too powerful God had to curse him with The Allegations(tm) or the Slasher Fandom would have ATE HIM UP.

And that’s that on THAT.

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x / raymond carver

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sorry i never replied. everyday is blending together and im losing sense of time

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Thinking about ‘The Cullens’ feral Brother, Jacob Black’ and how we were ROBBED of he and the Cullens actually becoming friends.

…

• Who moves around with the Cullens and actually… likes it?

• has long talks about Cars with Rosalie (Crazy, right? The family Mountain Lioness and Werewolf actually both really enjoy Cars and are the Family Mechanics. They scheme to Open a Shop and Esme even makes them Blueprints, but time will tell if they ever finish tweaking it.

• Gets into friendly scraps with Emmet and they’re the Family Athletes. They organize family Baseball, Foorball, and even Tag games.

• Alice and Jasper like him because he helps Alice to ‘Close her eyes’ every once in a while, and Jasper likes feeling her be content, and feeling Jacob becoming more Accustomed to the Family.

• He and his ‘Older Younger Twin’ Bella getting into Indestructible Adrenaline Junkie stuff and Ness and Edward being their Polite, Polished besties cheering them on.

• Jacob and Nessie are the absolute strangest Siblings you’ve ever seen. Anyone who knows them knows ‘The Really Tall Native one, and the Curly Red Haired girl are nice and actually kind of cool but do not say anything about how weird she is or he’ll get mad.’

• Jacob is Nessie’s bodyguard, and it’s kind of hard for her to act normal because she’s always communicated like that, why should she say out loud what she can show you much simpler and quieter?

• I actually imagine an older Ness as a sort of Oddball Fashionista like Alice, but very quiet and introverted like Bella, Rose, and Esme. I think she and Jacob spend a lot of time researching fun Outdoorsy places for the family to visit to Hunt or just Vacation, and Jacob specifically helps the family stay a little more grounded.

• Gives Esme a reason to cook sometimes when he’s particularly famished and a Raw Hunt just isn’t doing it, or if his Pack visits.

• “Esme, can we play Mario Kart in the living room tonight?”

“Jacob, Honey, that’s a wonderful idea! Ooh! I’ll make you and Ness some Cookies, and I know Carlisle just got a shipment of Yak’s blood all the way from Tibet! I could make Cocoa!”

An hour later, a house full of Supernatural Creatures are playing Mario Kart.

Jacob and Ness scarf down two scratch made batches of Chocolate Chip Cookies, Medium Well!

The Vampires and Ness are all sipping on Mugs of Warmed Yak’s blood, and Jacob shows Ness how to pile the Marshmallows on!

Jacob and Bella actually help out the odds of beating Alice and Edward VASTLY. They would dominate if it wasn’t for Bells and Jake.

• I NEED JACOB BACK TO BEING A FUN, GOOFY MECHANIC PLEASE THE EMO-WOLF PHASE IS SO BAD.

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hey kinda messed up that 1st degree burn is the mildest burn but 1st degree murder is the worst murder. they should have collaborated more on that one.

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“[kink] is bad because [thing the kink is based on] is bad” is such a funny take. we’re acting. you hate theater. you’re standing up in the audience and mansplaining to lady macbeth that killing people is wrong

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SINNERSSSSSSSSSS

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“What the FUCK? What’s that MEAN?”- Nancy Holbrook 24/7

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HEAR ME OUT, HEAR ME OUT:

Grandpa Clark Kent.

He’s retired to the country with Lois, Johnathan’s gotten married himself and has a couple of kids.

Imagine Clark, Grey haired and grinning, flying his grandkids around town because “it’s funner with Papa Clark! He flies better!”

Imagine Clark having the most devious ‘old man strength’ on the planet.

Clark, retired, working on his truck while listening to the Radio with Lois as he re-chills their Iced tea with his breath.

Clark holding meetings with young metahumans, and becoming the head of a larger outreach of Justice League Programs, showing them they can have a full, long life even with their powers.

OLD MAN CLARK I NEED OLD MAN CLARK.

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Burn for you: ANOES edit

Sometimes burning for someone is absolutely NOT a good or romantic thing…

(Jackie and Rooney stop looking at each other like that challenge: Level impossible)

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NANCY HOLBROOK: AKA LITTLE MISS NO NAME

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Repeat-listening to this banger and thinking Blorbo things…

“I burn for you.” “You burn… for me?”

Hey so I’m actually about to lose it.

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"The creator definitely didn't put that much thought into it" well then clearly someone else has to and I think I'm the weirdo for the job

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baby i could treat you so good you just have to get past my strange and off-putting demeanor and my kubrick stare and my inability to behave like a human and the 40 layers of icy fortress walls i have up and answer my riddles three