I wish I could make friends so easily.
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It’s hurts so much that you’re so afraid of people hurting you again, that you just won’t ever open up to anyone beside one person.
I’m too afraid to cry for help knowing that I’ll be judge or that my emotions are invalid and no one will really help me. I’m afraid to be such a burden to anyone that I’ve fully accepted to be silent and sadly be okay leaving this world if it means that everyone will be safe not having me around.
I’m
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Guess this is my life.
28 years old and I still haven’t figured myself out. Have a part time job but with how my schedule works I have a lot of free time to where I can figure who I am, thing is, I don’t know what I am beside the label of fiance, daughter, christian, and human.
In High School I used to be really creative to where I did win art awards and had exhibit the school put out. Though, after trauma I stopped touching anything creative and just, survive. Now I’m where I want to be creative but just, afraid to. I tried to do billing and coding but dropped out of that and now I’m at a stand still.
Should I go back to the arts and go to school for art school? or should I just give up.....I don’t know anymore. I don’t want to be someone who just watches a shit ton of anime and be a shut in, I want to explore and try to be creative. Who knows, but I’m not getting younger. So maybe I should use this blog that literally no ones know and just put my artwork?
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s4 was…. eventful, least we got more Haida :]
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I had a sudden urge to paint Chinese porcelain snakes with plants. Not exactly holiday themed but who knows how inspiration works anyway lol
Merry Christmas!
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Seasonal Dread of the Dark
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Groovy baby!
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celi_arts on Instagram / Etsy
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no longer fits
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Abandoned window in the forest. Ink and watercolor on paper. Really loved working on this. Prints available soon x Shop | Instagram
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