typingtakoyaki

[typingtakoyaki]

Midnights is a wild ride of an album and I couldn’t be happier that my co pilot on this adventure was Jack Antonoff. He’s my friend for life (presumptuous I know but I stand by it) and we’ve been making music together for nearly a decade HOWEVER… this is our first album we’ve done with just the two of us as main collaborators. We’d been toying with ideas and had written a few things we loved, but Midnights actually really coalesced and flowed out of us when our partners (both actors) did a film together in Panama. Jack and I found ourselves back in New York, alone, recording every night, staying up late and exploring old memories and midnights past. We were so lucky to also work with our brilliant collaborators Sam Dew, Sounwave, Lana Del Rey, Jahaan Sweet, Keanu Beats, William Bowery, and Zoe Kravitz. Laura Sisk was our excellent engineer. The wonderful and wise Beth Garrabrant took the album photographs. Midnights is a collage of intensity, highs and lows and ebbs and flows. Life can be dark, starry, cloudy, terrifying, electrifying, hot, cold, romantic or lonely. Just like Midnights. Which is out now  

https://taylor.lnk.to/taylorswiftmidnights

[typingtakoyaki]

102422 23:54

it's me, hi. i'm the problem, it's me.

anti-hero

[typingtakoyaki]

Midnights, the stories of 13 sleepless nights scattered throughout my life, will be out October 21. Meet me at midnight.

Pre-order now: https://taylor.lnk.to/taylorswiftmidnights

[typingtakoyaki]

inferior

applauses used to be my vice and now i can't stand a minute in the crowd, because they said it's no good bearing praises. i used to say, "i can do this, it's not that hard," but now i feel like i have nothing left of me. i'm empty, they're filled. i'm clouded, they're clear. so i hide myself away because i'm afraid their eyes are all on me, watching my every move, monitoring if i've been a good girl today.

and just like that, i'll survive a rain just to face another hurricane.

i used to know that levels of difficulty are there to be distinguished, but right now, i just couldn't bear to understand whether if it's harder to make up excuses to fill my absence or just never be there at all so i don't have to endure my invisibility and the nothingness of my role.

i wasted my potential for their approval and i could not do anything to turn things back to the way they were before i was their prisoner, but i know how to fake half of everything so i can survive.

my world becomes smaller as i step into the tiled floor of their building, and i turn into a stringed puppet when i spend the night with them.

not being allowed to speak my mind i can bear, but now they have taken away my chance to speak my heart too and i don't know how much longer do i have to be put under the custody of the ones not of my blood.

i still struggle to find meaning in these, though i know there are a few i can live with, and i know i've read the terms and conditions beforehand, thinking it's for the bigger cause.

maybe, this is just a proof that though a line is point to point, it can still curve. but i wish, from the bottom of my heart, that i won't get tired of the process and see myself as one of them rather than their captive.

because whether i wholeheartedly accepted this fate or made my way here with resentment thinking "it's not like i have a choice," i will still live the rest of it for what it's worth.

i just hope there is something in this inferiority for me.

[typingtakoyaki]

never felt so alone in this togetherness.

never felt so lost in plain sight.

never felt so fucking disappointed amid the praises.

[typingtakoyaki]

i can't fix my body clock and i sometimes forget to take a bath (i'm so depressed that i stay up all night self-loathing and i chose not to tell anyone because i'm afraid i'll be a burden and they will feel bad for me so i stay quiet to avoid ruining their peace and for them to think it’s just normal to have insomnia and not take a bath because it’s cold and they won't have to worry about anything else because they sleep peacefully and their life is so put-together they won’t even have to forget about taking a bath).

[typingtakoyaki]

i hope the pool of tears make my eyes so tired that i fall asleep tonight, because falling asleep makes me feel nothing and i like that better than being awake feeling everything.

[typingtakoyaki]

032622 09:21

and my words shoot to kill when i'm mad; i had a lot of regrets about that.

this is me trying

[typingtakoyaki]

011922 00:08

i'll be summer sun for you forever.

forever winter

[typingtakoyaki]

god i'm so pretty

[typingtakoyaki]

[typingtakoyaki]

you are.

i remember summer love that lurks in dark bedrooms and pretends last night didn't exist when everyone reveals to be awake in the sunrise.

i remember our own plotted movie scenes and the songs that became our soundtracks just in case we decided to run away together.

i remember the month of august, how we met behind the mall with matching boots and sore feet. i remember the lipstick stain on my coffee cup from every time i sipped when i opened up to you for the first time about things i'm not proud of, nervously.

i remember october. i remember how i taught you how deep love should be and how worthy it should sound when you finally relay the words to someone through my five handwritten letters. and in return, you taught me a slow-burn friendship to lovers trope; not rushed, not forced. you taught me that love was not burning red, but rather golden — golden like daylight.

and how could i forget about that november night?

when i got tipsy from an expired bottle of pink gin and being annoyed with you for alienating yourself from me because i was doing not-your-thing things.

i remember you said sorry while my head was spinning, i remember you caressing my hair like you always do, but this time while telling me i'm the most beautiful girl you've ever seen.

i remember asking you to lay in bed with me. i remember saying things i'm not supposed to and you telling stories about your life no one has ever heard before.

and then i remember you said "i love you" for the first time.

i, who was shocked, tensed, and half-drunk, did not say it back — yet. but i remember wishing you meant it. so i kept playing a classic song from carole king called "will you still love me tomorrow?" in the morning. on repeat.

you did. you loved me the day after that, and then the next days that followed.

and then i loved you too — undoubtly and without a care in the world.

you hang around like an early gift for december. i remember falling asleep in your room on christmas eve and you waking me up at exactly twelve o'clock just to greet me and give me a kiss.

i never thought that summer love could turn into something autumnal and that someone like you who used to play with fire is now keeping me warm. my heart remains brittle and soft — but now, it's only breakable for you.

i tend to forget a lot of things, but the series of memories i made with you are engraved in my soul and i encapsulate your blueprint as if we are written in the stars.

you are my soulmate. you are the person at the end of that invisible string. you are the one i wanted to get out of every turmoil with as my teammate, even if it means leaving an avalanche behind.

i could break my ribs and just casually hand you my heart because nothing will ever take good care of it for me but you.

you are, my love, is a dream so surreal that reality feels ashamed to co-exist with you. even when my brain rots, or when my heart breaks, or when my soul loses, i will never skip a part of a life that has you in it.

i love you and i will always remember you. in everything.

[typingtakoyaki]

120321 14:47

but you know what they say, you can't help who you fall for, and you and i fell like an early spring snow.

i bet you think about me

[typingtakoyaki]

120121 14:47

and i know for you, it's always me.

i know places

[typingtakoyaki]

[typingtakoyaki]

The first ever performance of All Too Well (10 min version) was at the AMC 13 theater in front of 400 fans. We recorded the acoustic performance so now we can all experience it together. It’s available here https://taylor.lnk.to/atw-collection

[typingtakoyaki]

111421 00:18

just between us, do you remember it all too well?

all too well (ten minute version)