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txaritsa · 23 days ago

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🌊Beneath the Abyss🌊

♡︎ synopsis: Lured by a haunting melody, you find yourself pulled into the depths of the sea, only to be saved by Rafayel, a mysterious merman.

♡︎ pairing: Rafayel x fem!reader

⭒˗ˏˋ𓆩 ⚠ 𓆪ˎˊ˗⭒MINORS DNI (18+ ONLY)⭒˗ˏˋ𓆩 ⚠ 𓆪ˎˊ˗⭒

♡︎ cw: depictions of (almost) drowning, mermaid au , semi-public seggs, oral (f!receiving)

♡︎ word count: 6.2k

♡︎ a/n: the second story for kinktober 2024. the beginning was very fun to write for someone with thalassophobia 🙂

♡︎ Thank you to my dearest friend and my beta reader ♡︎@its-de♡︎ for helping.

divider by @cafekitsune

Tonight is like any other night - where you sit on a wooden bench by the cliffside and read an old book. The sky is dark as ink, the stars distant and blinking slowly. The moon hangs low and casts a silvery light, illuminating the worn pages of your book. The sea is far below, its waves like whispers, soothing your thoughts as you read. Each wave crashes against the cliff’s base in a rhythmic hum. This place seems cold and unwelcome, but it’s yours. You’ve always come here, seeking solitude that only the night can offer. The dark doesn’t frighten you—it embraces you like an old friend. You feel safe here.

But then, it happens.

A sound, soft at first, like a breath carried on the wind, slips through the night. As it drifts closer, it wraps itself around your mind, around your soul. It’s a melody unlike anything you’ve ever heard—haunting, hypnotic, and achingly beautiful. It calls to something deep inside of you, and before you even realize what you’re doing, you’re standing, the book forgotten, your feet moving on their own.

The song grows stronger, tugging at you, pulling you toward the cliff's edge. You don’t resist. You can’t. The sea below crashing, dark and deep, but it no longer feels distant or dangerous. It feels inviting. The melody grows stronger, filling the air with its melancholic beauty. It’s not the sweetness of the song that unnerves you, but the way it seeps into your bones, like the sea pulling at the shore. You take another step, the rocks beneath your feet slick and uneven, but none of it matters now. Only the song matters.

And then—you fall.

The world tilts, and the sky spins above you as you plummet toward the water. Panic grips your chest, your heart racing as you crash into the icy depths. The cold is shocking, like needles through your lungs, and the once inviting sea now feels like it has you in its grasp, pulling you under. You thrash, desperate, your limbs sluggish as the water envelops your whole being. You open your mouth to scream, but no sound escapes—only bubbles rising to the surface.

You can’t believe this is happening. You’re going to drown.

Terror floods your veins as you sink deeper, your lungs burning, the black water pressing in from all sides. The song, the beautiful, irresistible song, has led you to this cold, watery grave.

You’re sinking into the deep. How could you let this happen to you?

But then, through the suffocating darkness, you see him.

A figure, a shadow, moving swiftly through the water. His form isn’t human, but sleek and graceful. His movements are too fluid, too fast. You blink, your vision fading as the last of your air escapes in a stream of bubbles.

For a brief moment, you think he’ll leave you to this terrible fate. But then, his hands, cool and firm, wrap around your waist, pulling you upward with a strength that feels effortless. His touch is strangely gentle as he propels you toward the surface, through the crushing weight of the sea.

You break through the surface with a gasp, sucking in air as your body shakes, your limbs still heavy and numb from the cold. His grip remains on you, guiding you through the water as he swims toward the shore. He brings you to a sheltered cove hidden from the world. Here, the water is calm, the sea’s roar softened to a murmur. He releases you gently onto the shore, your body trembling, your mind reeling from what just happened.

You lie there for a moment, catching your breath, your heart pounding in your chest. When you finally lift your head, you see him.

You can’t believe it. You sit in the sand, your breath ragged, lungs burning from the saltwater you swallowed, but your eyes—your eyes are locked on him. A figure not human, not entirely, but something out of stories you were told as a child. Stories you never believed. Myths, you always thought.

A merman.

The word seems impossible, heavy and foreign in your mind, yet he is there before you, dripping with seawater, his form half in the waves, half on the shore. His dusky purple hair clings to his forehead, eyes the color of shifting sunsets—blue fading into pink, hypnotic and unreal. His pale blue tail glistens under the moonlight, every shimmering scale catching the silver glow, moving with a grace that seems almost too smooth.

Are you hallucinating? You struggle to grasp at the fact what you're seeing is true. Mermaids were the stuff of stories, tales sailors told after too much drink, legends spun to explain away the strange sea. But now, here he is. A merman. He saved you.

You feel the weight of that thought settle in your chest—he saved you. Pulled you from the dark, icy depths. His hands had been firm around your waist, his strength undeniable as he swam you to safety, your body limp and helpless in his grip. The memory of it sends a shiver through you, a mixture of fear and awe. And now he is watching you with those strange, unreadable eyes. Your heart beats faster, not out of fear but something deeper—curiosity, wonder, gratitude. You don’t know how to feel.

“Thank you,” you manage to say, your voice hoarse and trembling.

He doesn’t respond, his gaze flickering as if trying to understand your words. He’s silent, but there’s something in his eyes—something that isn’t cold, something that isn’t indifferent. He’s saved you, and yet, you can see the hesitation and caution. His lips part, as if he wants to say something, but no words come. He seems frustrated, as though language is a barrier neither of you can cross.

Still, there’s a connection between you—fragile but real. You stand up and take a small step toward him, your eyes meeting his. He stares at you, taking in your wet form, the way your clothes cling to your body. There’s a flicker of something in his expression—something that looks almost like curiosity. But then, as quickly as it appeared, it’s gone.

As he slips back into the water, his eyes linger on you one last time, and without a word, he disappears beneath the surface. You realize then, with a strange certainty, that you’ll see him again. He may not have meant for you to be drawn into his world, but now, neither of you can escape it. You’ve crossed a threshold, and there’s no going back.

Tomorrow, you’ll return. You both will.

𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𓇼 ࣪ 𓈒ㅤׂㅤ⋆｡𖦹 °. 𓇼

You arrive at the cove just as the sun begins to set, the sky turning into shades of amber and rose. What happened last night feels surreal. But the ache in your muscles tells you it was very much real. In your hand, you clutch a small gold bracelet. It’s a token, a simple gesture, but it feels like the least you can offer him for saving your life. You hope he’ll accept it.

You sit by the shore, the same place where he left you, eyes scanning the horizon. You don’t know how long you’ll wait, but something tells you he’ll come. And you don’t wait long.

The water stirs, a ripple moving across the surface. Your breath catches in your throat as you see him. He emerges from the depths with that same graceful ease, his scales glistening in the fading sunset. His eyes find yours, and for a moment, neither of you speak. You simply stare, caught in the same strange tension from the night before. He stays just out of reach, half-submerged in the shallow waters of the cove, watching you.

You shift towards him slowly, trying not to startle him this time. You hold up the bracelet. “For you.” your voice hesitant. You know he doesn’t understand the words, but maybe he’ll understand the gesture.

His gaze flickers to the bracelet, and slowly, cautiously, he moves closer. He raises one hand from the sea, fingers delicate, reaching toward the gift. His gaze never leaves yours as his fingers brush against the gold. You clasp it around his wrist gently, and a breath you’ve been holding leaves your lips. He stares at it for a moment, watching the way it catches the light. Then, he looks at you, his expression unreadable, but his guard... lowered. He doesn’t speak, but there’s a softness in his gaze now.

You smile, gesturing to yourself. “I’m...” You say your name slow and clear, hoping he’ll understand. You point again, repeating, “My name is...”

He watches you, brow furrowing in concentration. He lifts a hand, mimicking your gesture, pointing to himself. “Rafayel,” he says, and your heart skips a beat at the sound of his silky voice.

A smile tugs at your lips. You repeat his name, savoring the sound of it. It’s a small step, but it feels like a bridge between your worlds.

For the next few minutes, you try to teach him more. Simple words. “Water.” You gesture to the sea. “Sky.” You point to the sky. Each time, he watches you closely, though his lips struggle to form the words. He repeats after you, hesitant at first, but with growing confidence. It’s slow, but it’s something. You laugh softly when he stumbles over a word, and his lips twitch, just the slightest hint of amusement in return.

The moon starts to rise. You sit by the shore while Rafayel rests in the shallow water, his body half-submerged. The quiet between you feels comfortable now, no longer heavy with uncertainty. He watches you with a mix of curiosity and caution, his guard still there, but not as rigid.

𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𓇼 ࣪ 𓈒ㅤׂㅤ⋆｡𖦹 °. 𓇼

You bring a book the next night, an old fairytale, the kind with simple words and enchanting stories. He’s there again and you sit together by the water, turning the pages. You point at the pictures, saying the words slowly, and he listens, repeating the ones he can manage. Each night, you bring another, reading to him in the soft glow of the moon. His words are broken, but he tries. He watches your lips when you speak, mimicking the movements, and each night, you get a little closer to understanding each other.

And as the days pass, something else shifts between you. His wariness fades, replaced by a playful curiosity. He teases you with small splashes of water, grinning at your surprised reactions. His hands linger when he helps you stand up, his touch growing bolder, more confident. You catch him staring sometimes, his eyes roaming your face, your body, with an intensity that sends warmth rushing through you.

You talk more now, not just with words but with gestures, shared looks, and smiles. He asks questions, his voice thick with the unfamiliar human language, but eager to learn. You tell him about your world, your life, and he listens, even if he doesn’t understand it all. And when he speaks of his world, you try to piece together the meaning from the few words he knows, from the way his hands move as if painting a picture.

And each night, as you leave the cove, there’s a part of you that doesn’t want to go. There’s a part of him, too, that lingers in the water, watching you with a look that makes you think he feels the same.

The gold bracelet still gleams on his wrist, a reminder of the night he saved your life.

𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𓇼 ࣪ 𓈒ㅤׂㅤ⋆｡𖦹 °. 𓇼

Rafayel has always been wary of humans, but with you, he finds himself wanting to know more. There’s a softness in your eyes that eases him, a vulnerability that makes him open up, bit by bit. Each time you smile at him, something stirs in his chest, he can’t quite explain it. It’s different from anything he’s ever known. You’re not like the humans he’s been taught to avoid; there’s no malice, no threat in your presence.

Your beauty, though undeniable, isn’t what captivates him the most. It’s the way you see him. He is not a creature from the deep, something to be feared, but something - someone you want to know. And it confuses him—this growing need to be closer to you, to understand you, to touch you. He’s never felt this way before, and it scares him. But he can’t stay away. The more time he spends with you, the more he begins to desire your presence, the way you make him feel more alive.

The comfort of the cove has become a sanctuary for Rafayel and you. But tonight, something lingers in the air. You’ve been thinking about that first night—about the song that led you to the edge of the cliff. You turn to him, your voice soft but curious “That night, the song... were you the one singing it?”

Rafayel’s gaze hardens at the question, his eyes showing a mix of emotions. He doesn’t answer right away, and for a moment, you worry that you’ve overstepped. But then, his head dips, as if looking for the right words. He takes a breath, his voice low. “Song... not for you.” His eyes meet yours, and there’s something darker there now, something painful. “For sailors, bad men. Hurt... my kind.”

You feel the weight of his words. You’ve heard stories of sailors plundering the depths, but seeing the pain in Rafayel’s eyes—it feels real now. His hand reaches for yours. He explains, his voice thick with emotions he struggles to contain. “Revenge, for my kind. They come, take… kill. They don’t care. ”His fingers tighten slightly around yours, as if bracing himself for what he’s about to say next. “I... stop them. I sing, they follow.”

You realize then what his song was meant to do. It was a lure for the sailors, to drag them beneath the waves. The weight of that presses down on you, and yet, there’s no fear. Only sadness for the pain he’s carried. You swallow, trying to find the right words. “But... I wasn’t meant to hear it.”

He shakes his head, his grip on your hand softening, his voice quieter now. “No. You... not like them. You hear, but...” His brow furrows. “I... not want to hurt you.” The vulnerability in his voice catches you off guard. This creature, so powerful and full of vengeance, pulled you from the depths when he could have just let you drown.

You look at him. “I’m sorry.” you say softly, though you know it’s not enough. “I’m sorry for what they did to you. I didn’t know.”

His eyes soften, the darkness in them fading as he looks at you. “You... don’t need to know,” he murmurs. “You are... different.”

You squeeze his hand gently, offering what comfort you can. “I’m glad you didn’t let me drown.” you say, a soft smile tugging at the corners of your lips.

Rafayel smiles back and you see a glimmer of warmth in his eyes. “Me too.” he says quietly, his thumb brushing against the back of your hand.

𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𓇼 ࣪ 𓈒ㅤׂㅤ��｡𖦹 °. 𓇼

The nights spent by the cove have become a routine. You sit with a fairytale book in your lap, your fingers tracing over the worn pages as you read aloud. Rafayel lies on his stomach, his body still, but his gaze is not. He watches you, ombre eyes tracing every movement of your lips, every flutter of lashes as you speak. You glance up from the book, catching the intensity of his stare. A playful smile tugs at your lips, and you pause mid-sentence. "What are you looking at?" you tease.

Rafayel’s brows furrow in concentration. He still struggles to find the words, but he gestures to his own face, then to yours. "You... beautiful."

The words catch you off guard, a blush peppering your cheeks. You are taken aback by his honesty. He says it so simply, as if it’s the most natural thing in the world. Your heart skips a beat, but you brush it off with a soft laugh. “Thank you.”

He tilts his head with confusion in his eyes, as though he doesn’t understand why you would laugh. You shake your head, reaching out to rest your hand on his arm, feeling his cool skin. His body reacts instantly to your touch, a shiver running through him, but he doesn’t pull away. Instead, his hand comes to rest over yours.

Each evening, the distance between slowly fades. Touches become more frequent, more intentional. A hand resting on his arm, fingers tracing his jaw, the way his tail brushes lightly against your leg as he moves closer.

One night, Rafayel’s curiosity takes a new turn. You’re sitting on the sand, the fabric of your flowy dress bunched up around your legs. His gaze lingers on the material that shifts with the breeze. He tilts his head, lips in a small pout. Then he reaches out, pointing at your legs, gesturing to the flowing fabric. “Why... clothes?” he asks.

You laugh softly. “Humans wear different clothing depending on the weather, or their style. And we wear shoes to protect our feet.”

At the mention of shoes, his eyes drop to your bare feet. He looks back at you, his lips parting as if to ask something, but hesitates.

"Do you want to touch them?" you ask.

His face lights up with a mix of curiosity and caution. He nods. You stretch your leg out toward him, offering your foot, and he reaches for it, his fingers brushing lightly over the arch. You smile, watching his face as he studies your foot with such focus that makes you chuckle. But then, his fingers accidentally graze a ticklish spot making you pull away from his grasp and laugh as a reflex.

He jerks his hand back, eyes wide with concern, but you shake your head quickly, still laughing. “It’s okay! You just tickled me.”

His expression softens into a playful one, and he does it again, deliberately this time. He watches as your body reacts, your foot flinching away from his mischievous hands, your laughter bubbling up again. You can see the spark in his eyes, the way his lips curl into that rare smile you’re starting to see more often.

Now your eyes trace pale blue tail that glimmers in the water. You can’t stop yourself from staring. You’ve wanted to touch it from the very first moment you saw him.

You take a deep breath. “Can I... touch your tail? It’s okay if you don’t wa - .”

He chuckles at your stammering and nods, easing your anxiety. He takes your hand in his, and lowers it onto his tail, around where knees would be. Your lips part in awe, feeling the cool, sleek texture of his scales beneath your fingertips. It’s smooth, almost silky.

You look up at him. “Your tail... it’s incredible.”

Rafayel’s lips twitch into a small smile, pleased by your fascination. He shifts his body, fully focusing on your legs again. His eyes travel up, towards the space between your thighs. He glances at your face, then back, as though trying to make sense of something. Slowly, he leans in, his head tilting as he peers under the hem of your dress, his curiosity as innocent as it is bold.

A flush of heat rises to your cheeks, scooting back and pressing your thighs together. "Uh, Rafayel..." you murmur, your voice catching.

He looks up at you, confused. You can tell he doesn’t fully understand what he’s done to make you flustered, but he’s aware of the shift in your energy. “What... there?” he asks, his voice uncertain, his hand motioning toward your dress.

You bite your lip, the blush deepening. There’s no hidden intent in his question—just pure curiosity, the same way he’d ask about the books or the language you’re teaching him. You take a shaky breath. “It’s... private,” you say, choosing your words carefully. “Humans have parts that are personal, and we usually keep them covered, especially around others.”

He nods slowly. His eyes go to your dress for just a moment before they return to yours. “Private,” he repeats, the word unfamiliar on his tongue, but he seems to grasp the meaning of it. You can see the restraint in him now, the way he pulls back slightly, giving you space.

In the quiet that follows, you smile at him, reaching out to touch his face lightly, your fingers brushing over his soft skin. “You’re learning quickly,” you say softly, and he leans into your touch, his eyes closing for just a moment. But now you have a question. Your heart races as you summon the courage to speak. "Rafayel..." you begin, your voice barely above a whisper. You swallow hard, feeling the heat rise to your cheeks. "Where... where are your private parts?"

The words hang awkwardly between you, and you immediately regret it. Your body tenses as you brace for his reaction. Instead of laughing or brushing off the question, Rafayel’s expression softens with understanding. He lies on his back, glancing down at his sleek, muscled form. There’s a pause as he considers how to respond, his lips curving in a soft smile.

"They're hidden," he says quietly, pointing to the area right below his pelvis. "Beneath, for… when we need them."

You find yourself staring at the spot where he’s pointing. You bite your lip, glancing at him out of the corner of your eye. His gaze is already on you, soft and unassuming, as if waiting for you to speak.

"So… how does it work?" you ask hesitantly.

Rafayel tilts his head, his brow furrowing slightly as he processes your words. "Work?" he repeats. He looks down at his tail, then back up at you. "You… want to know?"

The heat rises to your cheeks, and you glance away, your fingers fidgeting with the hem of your dress. "I—I guess, yeah," you stammer. "I mean, you asked me, and I…" You trail off, embarrassed.

Rafayel’s lips quirk into a small, knowing smile, and his eyes soften at the sight of your flushed cheeks. Slowly, he speaks again. "I can… show?"

Your breath catches in your throat. The idea of him revealing that intimate part of himself makes your heart race. But before you can respond, Rafayel adds "If… I see yours too?"

Your hands tighten on the fabric of your dress, your mind racing. There's an openness in the way he asks, a genuine desire to understand you better. "You want to see mine?" you ask, your voice trembling just a little. Rafayel nods, his eyes flicking downward for just a second before meeting yours again. “Yes. You… show me. I… show you."

The tension hangs heavy between you, and for a moment, you both just sit there. You consider his words and finally, you nod. "Okay."

Rafayel hesitates for a moment, his eyes searching yours for permission one more time. With a slow nod from you, he shifts, moving just enough to give you a better view. The area he pointed at begins to part slightly, the scales pulling aside to show what is hidden. Your eyes widen as you catch the first glimpse of what lies underneath. The sight is mesmerizing, a beautiful hybrid of human and something entirely otherworldly. His member, long and thick, tapers slightly toward the tip. The texture is smooth with faint ridges along its surface. Your breath hitches as you notice how his arousal throbs gently, merging seamlessly with his aquatic form.

Rafayel watches you, how fascinated you are by this part of him. His lips quirk into a teasing smile, but a faint blush colors his cheeks. He’s aware of the tension of this moment, but there’s a playful, mischievous glint in his eyes as he tilts his head.

"You… stare long time," he teases, "You… like?"

Your breath catches as you meet Rafayel’s gaze, embarrassed for staring for so long. "Maybe," you admit with a shy smile.

Rafayel’s smile widens, his blush deepening. He glances down at himself, starting to feel bashful under your gaze, before his eyes return to yours. He shifts slightly, his hand moving to caress your cheek. His eyes move downward, toward the thin piece of clothing, then back to your face. You know it’s your turn.

The realization makes your palms clammy. Rafayel’s gaze never leaves yours, patient but full of expectation. And you want to match his vulnerability, to let him see you in the same way you’ve seen him. With a trembling hand, you reach under your dress, tugging down the bottom part of your swimsuit, his eyes following your every movement. Discarding the piece of clothing to the side, you lean back on your hands, spreading your legs.

Rafayel’s eyes widen as he stares at your exposed form, lingering on the soft skin between your thighs, on the slickness already gathering there. He looks mesmerized, his gaze flicking between your face and your body, as if he can’t decide where to focus.

"Can… I touch?" he asks, his fingers twitching with anticipation.

You nod, your heart racing. Slowly, his fingers brush against your inner thigh, cool and soft at first. His fingertips graze your entrance, and you let out a small gasp as a jolt of pleasure courses through you.

He pauses, glancing up at you with concern. “Hurt?”

You shake your head quickly, breathless. "No, no… that feels good," you assure him, your voice a little shaky. "But… if you keep touching me like that, I’ll get more… aroused." The honest answer makes your face flush even more.

Rafayel seems both intrigued and flustered by your response. Rafayel watches you closely, his fingers still resting gently against your slick entrance. He looks down, his breath catching as he feels the wetness coating his fingers. You can see his chest rising and falling as if he's trying to keep control of himself.

He glances back up at you. "Can I… touch more?"

The question takes you by surprise. This isn’t just curiosity or playful exploration anymore—this is crossing into something more intimate. You look at him, your breath catching in your throat. There’s a need that’s been growing inside him for so long—one he’s kept carefully in check, unsure if he could ask, unsure if this moment would ever come.

You feel a rush of warmth flood through you at the realization, and with a soft, shaky breath, you nod, guiding his hand a little higher. "Touch me… here," you whisper, your voice barely audible as you place his fingers on the sensitive nub just above your entrance. "This is… very sensitive. If you touch it the right way, it’ll feel incredible."

Rafayel’s breath hitches as his fingers move under your guidance. His touch is light at first, but as he watches your reaction—how your body tenses with pleasure—he grows bolder, circling the sensitive spot with slow, deliberate movements.

The sensations are overwhelming, sending waves of pleasure crashing through you with every stroke of his fingers. Your hips instinctively move, seeking more of his touch, and you can’t help the soft moans that escape your lips. Rafayel’s eyes are locked on you now, his breath coming faster, his arousal clear in the way his body tenses.

"Yes," you gasp, your hands gripping the fabric of your dress as you struggle to hold back the rising tide of pleasure. "Just like that…"

Your body is trembling now, shaky gasps leaving your lips, each stroke pulling you closer to the edge. He watches you intently, eyes wide with fascination. He’s studying every reaction, every sound you make. Your fingers dig into the sand, gripping tightly as the pressure builds inside you, a tight coil ready to snap. His touch is gentle but insistent, the perfect rhythm against your most sensitive spot, and it doesn’t take long before you feel that wave approaching. Your hips buck against his hand, and the pleasure becomes too much, too overwhelming to resist.

“Rafayel -” you moan, your voice shaky. Everything seems to blur as the intense pleasure crashes over you in waves, your thighs trembling, your back arching helplessly as you come. Rafayel watches in awe, mesmerized by the way your body reacts to his touch, his hand still gently moving over your clit, prolonging your release as you ride out every last wave of pleasure. Your chest heaves, breathless, the sensation so intense you can barely focus, your body still twitching from the aftershocks. But as the pleasure subsides, his curiosity hasn’t. His fingers, still slick from your release, hover near your entrance, and he glances up at you. His fingers brush against your wetness, lingering just on the edge.

“What… if I…” he trails off.

You’re still catching your breath, your body sensitive, but you manage a nod, giving him permission. He moves slowly, his fingers slipping inside you, cautiously exploring. His finger slides into you easily, your entrance wet from your orgasm, and you let out a soft gasp as he pushes deeper. When he adds a second finger, stretching you just a little more, a shiver runs down your spine, the fullness making you moan softly. His eyes flick up to yours again, watching your face for any sign of discomfort, but all he finds is more of that same pleasure, your hips gently rocking against his hand, guiding him.

And then, as he curls his fingers inside you, searching, he finds it—the spongy spot deep within that makes your body jolt with pleasure. You react immediately, a gasp escaping your lips as he presses against it.

“There,” you gasp, your voice breathless and needy. “Right there…”

Rafayel’s eyes light up, his fingers moving with more confidence now, curling and stroking that sensitive spot inside you. The pleasure is overwhelming, a different kind of ecstasy that makes you arch into his touch, your walls tightening around his fingers. Each movement makes your moans grow louder, more desperate.

Without warning, he leans down, his mouth hovering just above your clit. Then he presses his lips to the sensitive nub. The shock of his warm mouth against you makes you cry out, your hips jerking against him as the pleasure intensifies tenfold. His tongue flicks out, tasting you, and when he hears your moan, he repeats the motion. Your hands instinctively tangle in his hair, guiding him as his tongue moves over your clit, licking and sucking in perfect rhythm with the motion of his fingers inside you. The combination is almost too much, the sensations making you dizzy, your body on the verge of losing control.

Rafayel seems affected by your reactions, his own breathing heavy now, his face flushed. He’s learning fast, his fingers curling just right inside you, hitting that sensitive spot over and over, while his mouth works your clit with growing skill. Your hips move desperately against him, seeking more of the pleasure he’s giving you, unable to stop yourself.

And then, you feel it—the tight coil inside you, about to snap again, but this time it’s different. The pleasure so intense it’s almost unbearable. You can feel your muscles clenching around his fingers, wet sounds filling the air as your body responds to him.

“I can’t… I’m going to…” you gasp, but before you can finish, your orgasm crashes over you, more powerful than anything you’ve ever felt before, your body convulsing, your hips bucking wildly against his hand and mouth. A sudden gush of wetness escapes you, your release splashing against his fingers, your muscles spasm with the force of it.

Rafayel freezes for a moment, startled by the intensity of your release, but he doesn’t pull away. His fingers stay inside you, his mouth still working your clit as you ride out the most intense orgasm of your life.

As your release finally subsides, you collapse back against the sand, panting and spent, your body still tingling. Rafayel pulls back, his fingers slipping from your entrance, wet with your release. He looks up at you, awe and a hint of pride in his eyes, as if he can hardly believe what he’s just made you feel.

When you catch the sight of Rafayel’s face, glistening with the remnants of your release, a shy smile tugs at your lips. You reach out, brushing your thumb gently across his cheek, wiping away the wetness. Both of you share a soft, breathy chuckle. Rafayel, his gaze lingering on your lips, leans down slowly. His breath fans across your skin, and then, with a soft press, his lips meet yours. It’s gentle at first, but the moment your lips connect, something shifts. The kiss deepens, grows more urgent, as though all the pent-up desire comes to the surface.

Your hands tangle in his hair, pulling him closer, needing more of him. His lips move against yours, his tongue teasing yours, and you feel the weight of his body pressing against you. His tail shifts in the sand, positioning himself between your legs, his hardened member brushing against your thigh. The contact makes you moan into the kiss, and you both know where this is headed. It feels natural, like this is where you were always meant to end up, like the bond between you has been building toward this moment. Rafayel’s gaze locks onto yours, checking for any sign of hesitation. But all you offer him is a small nod, your body aching to feel him inside you.

He begins to push forward, slow and careful, the head of his throbbing member pressing against your wetness. You can feel the stretch as he starts to ease into you, your body accommodating his size. The sensation is intense, your walls fluttering around him as he gradually sinks deeper. His eyes never leave yours, his brow furrowed in concentration, his mouth slightly parted.

“You… okay?” he asks softly, his voice strained with the effort of holding back.

“Yes,” you gasp, your body trembling. “Don’t stop.”

Encouraged, Rafayel moves deeper. Rolling his hips, each thrust pushes him further, until he’s fully within you, his body pressed flush against yours. He stills for a moment, savoring the warmth of your body wrapped around him. His hand moves down to where your bodies are joined, his thumb finding your clit, pressing against it in slow circles. You moan, your hips instinctively bucking against his, the stimulation pushing you closer and closer to the edge again.

Every thrust brings him deeper, hitting that sweet spot inside you, and you can’t hold back any longer. Your orgasm crashes over you, more powerful than the last. Your walls clench tightly around him, drawing him deeper, and you cry out his name. Your entire body shudders with the force of your release. The feeling of you pulsing around him pushes Rafayel over the edge. His thrusts become erratic, his breath ragged. With a deep groan, he buries himself inside you, his body shaking as his own orgasm overtakes him.

As the last hints of pleasure fade from your bodies, the night air settles around you, cool and soothing against your flushed skin. Rafayel’s body remains pressed against yours, his chest rising and falling in rhythm with your own as he holds you close. Your legs are still tangled with his tail, the beautiful texture of his scales brushing against your thighs, grounding you in this moment.

Rafayel presses a tender kiss to your temple. His lips trail down to your cheek, then to the corner of your mouth, and you turn your head, meeting him in a soft, languid kiss. Neither of you speaks for a long moment, simply resting in the aftermath. Rafayel shifts slightly, easing out of you carefully, and you can’t help but shiver at the loss of connection. He watches your face for any sign of discomfort, but all you offer him is a lazy smile.

A faint blush lingers on his cheeks, and his lips curve into a small, sheepish smile. "You not hurt?"

You laugh softly, shaking your head. "No," you reply, your voice gentle. "Not at all. That was… wonderful."

He exhales in relief and chuckles softly. "Good."

You move to rest your head against his chest, listening to the steady rhythm of his heartbeat. He wraps an arm around you, pulling you closer, as if he can’t bear to let go just yet.

Then, after a few moments, you both start to chuckle, the sound light and easy. "I… didn’t think this would happen," you admit with a smile. "Not like this. Not tonight."

Rafayel hums in agreement. "You… so different. So... human," he adds with a playful smirk, but his tone softens. "And yet…"

You smile, lifting your head slightly to meet his gaze, finishing for him. "And yet, it feels right." Rafayel’s lips curve into a slow, gentle smile, and he leans down, his breath warm against your skin as he presses a soft kiss to your forehead. "Yes," he whispers. "It… feels right."

For a long time, you simply lie there together, wrapped in each other’s arms, your bodies warm and comfortable against the cool night air. Rafayel’s fingers continue to caress your skin, his touch tender and slow.

"Stay close," he whispers after a while, his voice barely audible, as if he’s speaking to himself, as if the thought of distance—any distance—is unbearable. His arms tighten around you, his embrace full of warmth and need.

You smile against his chest, nuzzling closer. "I’m not going anywhere," you murmur back. And you mean it. Whatever comes next, you’ll face it together.

#🔖 for later

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txaritsa · 23 days ago

Text

period cramps

warning: fluff — soft!sylus taking care of you during your 1st day of period 🤍

main acc: @sushiyuzu

the cramps hit hard, making you double over in bed, clutching at your lower abdomen as the pain radiated through you. you’d tried everything—heating pads, painkillers, lying in every position you could think of—but nothing seemed to ease the discomfort. it was one of those days where your period felt like a heavy weight on your body, and no matter how hard you tried to push through it, you just felt drained.

sylus had been in the other room, giving you space, but it wasn’t long before you heard the soft padding of his feet as he came to check on you. you were curled up on your side, wrapped in blankets, but your face must have given away how much pain you were in.

he sat down on the edge of the bed, his crimson eyes filled with concern. “still bad?” he asked softly.

you nodded, unable to muster the energy to say much. the cramps had you feeling so weak that even answering felt like a chore. instead, you just closed your eyes and tried to breathe through it.

sylus didn’t push for more. instead, he slipped off his shoes and settled himself next to you, his large body filling the space on the bed. without a word, he placed his warm hand on your lower back, rubbing slow circles that were so gentle, you could almost melt into the touch.

“let me help,” he whispered, his voice soothing.

you sighed, grateful for his presence. the way he rubbed your back felt like he was trying to massage the pain away, his hand firm but careful. “it’s just really bad today,” you finally murmured, your voice strained. “nothing’s helping.”

sylus frowned, a flash of frustration passing through his eyes. “i hate seeing you like this,” he admitted, his silver hair falling into his face as he leaned down to press a soft kiss to your temple. “i wish i could take it all away.”

you felt the weight of his words in the warmth of his touch. he always hated seeing you in pain, especially when there was nothing he could do to fix it. but even in moments like this, when all he could offer was comfort, he did it with so much care that it almost made the pain more bearable.

he stood up briefly, disappearing into the bathroom before returning with a fresh heating pad. he carefully placed it against your lower stomach, adjusting it until it was in the perfect spot. the warmth immediately began to soothe the cramps, at least a little.

“here,” he said softly, sitting back down beside you. “try this.”

you gave him a weak smile, grateful for the gesture. “you’re spoiling me,” you mumbled.

“you deserve it, sweetie,” he replied without hesitation. “especially when you’re feeling like this.”

he lay down beside you again, his arm wrapping protectively around your waist, pulling you close against his chest. his body was warm, solid, and the way he held you made you feel safe, like nothing else mattered but making sure you were okay.

“you know,” he said after a few moments of silence, “i read that massaging certain spots can help with cramps.”

you raised an eyebrow, glancing up at him through tired eyes. “did you really?”

he smirked, his crimson eyes twinkling with amusement. “i did. i looked it up earlier.”

“i can’t believe you looked that up,” you muttered, feeling a soft laugh escape your lips despite the pain.

“i’ll do whatever it takes,” he said with a shrug, then started gently kneading your lower back in slow, steady motions. “is this okay?”

you let out a long breath, feeling the tension in your muscles begin to ease under his touch. “yeah,” you whispered, closing your eyes. “that’s perfect.”

his hands worked magic, applying just enough pressure to relax your aching muscles without causing more discomfort. he was slow, deliberate, as if every touch was meant to ease your pain, and you could feel yourself starting to relax under his care.

“just let me take care of you, sweetie,” he murmured softly, his voice low and comforting. “you don’t have to do anything right now. just rest.”

you didn’t argue. the combination of the heating pad and sylus’ gentle massage was starting to lull you into a peaceful state, your body finally beginning to loosen up after hours of tension. the pain was still there, but it wasn’t as sharp, dulled by the warmth of his hands and the feeling of him beside you.

he shifted slightly, pulling you closer so that your head rested against his chest. his heartbeat was steady, a calming rhythm that made you feel more grounded. “i’ll stay right here,” he whispered, his lips brushing the top of your head. “i’m not going anywhere.”

you smiled faintly, your hand resting lightly on his chest as you snuggled into him. “i’m lucky to have you,” you murmured, your voice barely audible.

“no,” sylus replied softly, his hand continuing to rub soothing circles on your back. “i’m the lucky one.”

the two of you lay there in comfortable silence, the world outside forgotten as he held you close. the pain might not have gone away completely, but having sylus there, his warmth, his touch, made it so much easier to bear.

“just rest,” he whispered again, his voice so soft, like a lullaby. “i’ve got you, sweetie.”

#sylus 🏷️#fluff🧸

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txaritsa · 23 days ago

Text

💙🎀KOKOMI TERUHASHI💙🎀

💙I am the perfect example of a pretty girl, it's a fact ! I am the PERFECT PRETTY GIRL !

🎀I am beautiful on the inside and outside so I am incomparable.

💙People are lucky to be in the same room as me ! Infact , they are lucky since they exist in the same era as me . Afterall , I'm perfect from both inside and outside.

🎀I am out of everyone's league , no one can resist my beauty !

💙Poor people :( they are always so surprised that they lost for words .

🎀 I am truly an ethereal being !!

💙I am an attention magnet !

🎀My beauty has an effect on everyone, everyone is flustered & they go crazy when they see me. They all gasp at my beauty.

💙Whenever I go somewhere , all eyes are on me . It's a normal thing for me. I don't blame them , I am a GODDESS.

🎀I have lived as the definition of perfection on the inside and outside for __years. ( your age).

💙Everything is a piece of cake for me !

🎀I never disappoint 7 billion people on earth aka my fans !

💙God /Luck / Universe is really on my side !

🎀Anything I wear will fly off the shelves !!

💙I am so adorable , I look like a model since the day I was born !

🎀As I continue to grow , I become even more beautiful every year !

💙I receive countless compliments on my looks because I am the perfect,most beautiful girl.

🎀Try picturing the prettiest girl you have ever seen and make her 18 times more beautiful and you will get me !

💙The world is too kind to me !

🎀It's amazing how everyone is always memorized by me.

💙My perfect image is indestructible!

#self concept #she’s an icon #and she is the moment

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txaritsa · 23 days ago

Text

GUTTER BALL | changbin first date series. one night stand to lovers.

pairing: changbin x fem!reader word count: 5.2k genre: non idol au, fluff warnings: implied sexual content, swearing, mentions of drinking summary: a one night stand with changbin ends in pancakes and the promise of a date. the rest is history.

a/n: finally! the changbin chapter! i just want to take a second to say THANK YOU for all the support you guys have given this series so far. reading everyone's comments is genuinely the highlight of my day and i'm so happy you're all enjoying it. please remember that both my taglist and my requests are open, so don't be shy. once again, any and all feedback is appreciated. you guys are awesome, happy reading <3

The first thing you notice when you wake up is that this is not your room.

Blackout curtains, a lamp on the bedside table painting the walls in a warm glow, navy blue sheets that are pulled over your bare chest and—oh.

Oh.

“Fuck,” you mutter, throwing your arm over your eyes, “Fuck, fuck, fuck.”

Everything comes flooding back in an instant: the bar, dark curly hair, one too many drinks, a voice low in your ear, stumbling through his apartment door, the most ripped arms you’ve ever seen, and that tongue—

The sound of a door unlocking shakes you from your thoughts, followed by shoes being kicked off as you scramble to sit up and hug the sheet tighter around your body.

What was his name—Changbin? Changbin. That sounds right. At least from the memories you have where it was coming out in strangled moans from your throat. Which is dry, by the way, undoubtedly from the amount of alcohol and the…strain it was put through.

You don’t really have time to unpack that particular part of last night’s events when there’s a knock at the door—funny, because this is his room.

Flattening your back against the headboard, you clear your throat as best you can, “Come in.”

When it opens, Changbin’s head pops through, tufts of his hair sticking out from under a baseball cap. “Hey,” he says softly before stepping all the way in. He takes one look at you, your hands holding the bedsheet in a death grip, and wordlessly walks over to his dresser.

“I bought food,” he says with his back turned, pulling out a sweatshirt. He pulls out a few sweatpants too, shuffles through them until he finds some with a drawstring, and then turns back around to face you with the clothes held in his hand.

He looks…apologetic? Nervous? Really, really cute? That’s not a question, actually. He is cute.

You’re not sure if it’s the fact that you’re seeing him in better lighting for the first time, or maybe because you’re sober, or maybe because the only other image you have of him is when he’s hovering over your body and making you see stars, but you can’t help the little fluttering feeling that starts in your chest when he gives you a small smile.

“Your dress is kind of…I, uh…it’s ripped.”

Your eyebrows shoot up in shock at the same time you feel heat rush to your cheeks. “Oh,” is all you can say as you desperately try to remember that part of the night. Hands are all you see, big and strong, and you silently let your gaze fall to them as he moves forward to place the clothes at the foot of the bed.

“Yeah,” he rubs the back of his neck, “You can have these. They should fit you, and I don’t mind losing them. Consider it my reimbursement for ruining your dress.”

You lean forward slowly, still holding the blanket to your chest, and Changbin has to stop himself from staring at the exposed skin of your shoulder when your hair falls forward in the process. “These are—” your eyes go wide, “Balenciaga?!”

He blinks like you didn’t just name drop a brand that sells singular articles of clothing for double your paycheck. “Yeah?”

“I can’t take this.”

“Why not?”

“This costs more than me,” you say incredulously.

He moves to argue, but then a slow grin starts to spread across his face. He tones it down, minimizes it to a single upturn of the left side of his mouth. “I mean, you don’t have to wear anything. I don’t mind either way.” Changbin smirks, and you narrow your eyes.

“However,” he continues, “I would really, really like to see you in my clothes.”

🎳

“He gave you a what hoodie?” Felix’s voice is distant on the other end of the line. The clicking of his keyboard stops, there’s a rustle, and then suddenly his mouth is a lot closer to the speaker than it’d previously been.

Changbin’s en suite is huge, just like his bedroom. Once he slipped out to give you privacy, claiming he was going to set up the food, you’d allowed yourself to fully take in your surroundings. A california king sized bed, a walk in closet, an attached bathroom with a balcony.

You sigh, leaning back against the marble sink. Changbin’s sweats sit low on your hips, his hoodie all but swallowing your figure into the material.

“That’s not the point, Felix. Were you even listening to me? An entire five minute monologue about how I’m in his house and all you care about is the Balenciaga?”

“Does he have any, like, really hot friends?”

“Felix.”

“Wait. Is he really hot?”

“Felix!” you bring a hand to your forehead, using your thumb and middle finger to rub at the spots just above your eyebrows. “You’re not helping here.”

“Okay,” Felix says, his voice low, “It’s just that I’m having an issue seeing what the problem is.” You pinch the bridge of your nose to fight the oncoming headache as Felix rambles on.

“This guy brought you back to his place, rocked your world, and then what? Cuddled you? Bought you breakfast? Gave you his clothes that are worth more than my car and is now waiting for you to come out of his bathroom and enjoy a nice meal? And that’s bad because…?”

“You know what? I’m hanging up.”

“The hell you are! I left my fucking fortnite match for this! You’d better go out there and—” You slam your phone down on the bathroom counter, the sound echoing. If Felix wasn’t going to validate your very unnecessary nerves, then so be it.

You stare at yourself in the mirror, unfamiliar with the person looking back. It’s a little jarring, the sight of you in someone else’s clothes. A man’s clothes, no less.

It’s been a long time since you’ve had anything close to this sort of…intimacy. Hookups are normal for you, sure. But the mornings after are usually never more than a hurried goodbye as you gather your things and haul ass out the door. Most of the time you don’t even stay, sobered up enough after your post-coital state to slip out into the night and call an uber.

Your memory had come back in full as you were slipping Changbin’s clothes on once he left the room. The sex was great—amazing even. But afterwards, when he turned over and slipped an arm around your waist and hooked his chin on your shoulder was what really scared you.

Okay, maybe scared is an exaggeration. You aren’t scared, it’s just been a while. So what if you don’t crave male validation? Sex is the fun part anyways. Dating doesn’t necessarily go well for you, and feelings are definitely off the table when it comes to hookups. Because that’s all it is: a hookup. Changbin is no different.

You give yourself a total of thirty more seconds before braving a step out into the hallway, sheepishly peeking around the corner.

The apartment is unsurprisingly huge as well: a high ceiling, intricate marble flooring, a chandelier hung in the center of the living room that reflects the sunlight coming in from the floor-to-wall windows on the opposite side.

“Woah,” you say to no one in particular, walking into the dining room area, “This place is intense.”

Changbin looks up from his phone. His hat is off now, a mop of curls sit messily on his head, thick-rimmed glasses are situated at the tip of his nose, his arms—straining against the fabric of his black t-shirt—rest heavily on the table. You watch as he lets his eyes travel the length of you, painfully slow, something unreadable behind them.

“Food’s ready,” is all he says with a smile.

You sit down across from him, eyes wide. It’s like he bought out the entirety of an IHOP while you were asleep. There’s pancakes and waffles, hash browns and toast, an assortment of fruit, two different omelets, two cups of coffee, and at least five different types of syrup options.

“Are we…” you trail off, meeting his expectant gaze, “…expecting other people?”

Changbin nervously scratches his chin. “No, uh, I just—I didn’t know what you liked. And you were sleeping, so…yeah. I tried to cover all the bases.”

When you don’t respond, your eyes transfixed on him, he clears his throat. “Please eat,” he says, extending a hand to gesture at the food, “Let me know if there’s anything else you want.”

“Thank you,” you say, grabbing a fork. Changbin waits until he’s certain you don’t immediately hate it and then starts to eat, too.

It’s quiet, comfortable, sounds of cutlery clinking against plates are the only thing filling the silence as the two of you try to soothe your hangovers with full stomachs. You steal glances at him throughout, watch the way his lips pout when he chews, and then shyly look back down at your plate when he catches you staring. It’s kind of sweet, the idea that he did all this despite only having met you twelve hours ago.

It should be more awkward, too. You’re going to have to talk at some point. There’s an elephant in the room that’s shaped a lot like post-nut clarity mixed with morning-after regret and neither of you are making a move to address it.

“So um, about last night…” Changbin starts a few minutes later. He looks nervous, like he doesn’t know how to vocalize what he plans on saying next.

You nod, putting your fork down. This was to be expected. “I’ll be out as soon as I’m done eating, don’t worry.” Changbin’s head snaps in your direction. “It was really nice of you to get food and stuff, so thank you. I can put my dress back on too so that way I don’t have to take—”

“What?” Changbin furrows his eyebrows, “No. Wait. I’m not kicking you out, Jesus.”

You blink. “You’re not?”

“Of course not.” He stills. “Is that how these things usually go for you?”

Well that isn’t exactly a question you planned on answering. What are you supposed to say? Yeah haha I actually just kind of leave before they have a chance to come back from the bathroom?

“I mean, is that not how it goes for you?”

The blush that spreads across Changbin’s cheeks is hard to ignore. “I don’t—uh…I don’t do this.”

“You don’t buy girls breakfast after you sleep with them?”

“No I don’t—I don’t bring girls home.” He admits.

Oh.

“So I’m…?” The first, you want to ask.

“Yeah.”

Oh.

You’ve never been in this situation before. Apparently that’s Changbin’s specialty: helping you experience things that you normally wouldn’t.

“Listen,” he starts again, licking his lips. His leg is bouncing nervously, visible through the glass table. “I didn’t intend to sleep with you last night. Not because I didn’t want to! Fuck, I—I wanted to. And it was…God, it was amazing. But I feel kind of bad, because everything is out of order and I don’t want it to seem like I’m only trying to ask you now just because I want to get in your pants again or something but like—”

“Changbin,” you cut him off, “Breathe. You don’t—whatever it is you want to say, you can say it.”

He visibly relaxes as soon as his name comes out of your mouth.

“Can I take you on a date?”

There’s a long silence that follows, one that makes you question whether or not he actually said what you think he did. It feels a little surreal, not just the situation but Changbin himself. You went into this blind, completely void of any expectations, but somehow came out of it with—

“A…date?” you ask hesitantly.

“A date.” He repeats, more confident this time. “A real one. Not just a hookup. I mean, I thought you were beautiful—still do! That’s why I approached you at first. I wasn’t expecting to come back here but we were both drinking and then one thing lead to another and your face was so close and I—”

“Okay.” You say, stabbing at a piece of pancake with your fork.

“Okay?” Changbin asks, blinking at you like he didn’t hear correctly.

“I mean,” you swallow your food, “Typically I’d say you’re just trying to sleep with me, because what guy does all of this for a girl he knows literally nothing about?” Changbin nods in understanding. “But we’re kind of past that, aren’t we? So clearly you don’t have any other motives.”

He shakes his head vehemently. “No. Nope. Definitely don’t.” You quirk an eyebrow at him, to which he visibly pales. “Wait, not like that. I just mean that I’m motivated by the fact that you’re beautiful and I want to get to know you not…anything else.”

When you laugh it’s soft, no more than a few heavy exhales out of your nose. Changbin wishes he could hear it more, could get you to open up to him. “I’m not too sure there’s much you’d want to know.” You admit.

“Well that’s for me to decide, isn’t it?”

His tone is different now, much more confident. Maybe it’s the fact that he’s more at ease with the conversation, or maybe it’s because he wants to prove you wrong. Either way, it makes anticipation stir deep in your gut. Changbin is different, a good different.

“Yeah. Yeah, I guess it is.”

“So it’s a date?” He picks up a piece of watermelon with his fork, holds it out to you in some sort of a toast.

“Depends,” you poke another piece of your pancakes and let it hover in front of your face, “Are you gonna buy more of these?”

“I could make that happen.” He smiles, and for the first time you let yourself get lost in it.

“Then yeah,” you push your hand forward, clinking the sides of your forks together, “It’s a date.”

🎳

changbin [8:30am]

for you 🥞

you [8:31am]

are you going to do this every day?

changbin [8:31am]

absolutely

what kind of a man would that make me if i didn’t deliver your pancakes in the morning?

you [8:34am]

a normal one

changbin [8:34am]

sounds boring

do you want syrup with those?

🎳

“I can’t believe you’re doing this.” Felix says, leaning against the doorframe. He watches as you adjust your hair in the mirror, a wary look on his face from where you can see his reflection over your shoulder.

It’s been two weeks since you and Changbin hooked up. You’ve texted nonstop since then, most of it just casual conversation. It’s kind of nice; you get to hear about his day, what songs he’s currently listening to, and find out that he’s one hundred percent committed to the pancake bit. You let him know more about yourself too: your job, your annoying coworkers, which one of your comfort shows you’re rewatching for the fourth time. Changbin makes it a point to text you every morning and every night. You open your eyes to a pancake delivery and then close them after answering the question of: What type of pancakes do you want tomorrow?

Today, it was blueberry. Because today is the day you’re finally going on your date—and because Changbin’s sheets (that you haven’t stopped thinking about for some reason) are blue.

“What’s there to not believe, Lix?” you ask, turning to face him.

“I’m just worried.” He says, walking forward to place both hands on your shoulders. His face is serious, eyebrows pulled together slightly in that concerned look you know too well. Felix has seen firsthand what your last relationship did to you, spent nights with you tucked under his arm as you cried it out and he shoveled ice cream into your mouth. So yeah, he has the room to be worried.

“What if you mess up and I lose my chance to be his friend so he can give me a Balenciaga hoodie?”

Record scratch. Freeze frame. Whatever the hell happens in the tv shows. You shove his arms away with a scoff, rolling your eyes when he stumbles to the side as he laughs.

“You are so annoying.”

“And you better not ruin my chances of getting with one of his producer friends!” Felix calls out as you walk towards the living room. “I saw a cute one on his instagram. Don’t know his name—there was no tag, but oh my God, I love his nose.”

“You went through his socials?” you ask in disbelief, staring at him as he bends down to rummage through the fridge.

“Uh, yeah? Had to make sure he wasn’t some sort of weirdo that could possibly turn out to be a serial killer. Please, I’m not that bad of a best friend.”

“Sure. Whatever you say.” You smile, laughing at the pout he shoots your way.

Changbin’s got his hands in his pockets when you swing the door open. His hair is even fluffier than you remember, a white t-shirt hugging his chest perfectly beneath his jacket and—the glasses. The damn glasses. Your stomach starts churning at the sight, the smallest of cracks in your reserve starting to form.

“You’re early,” you say, giving him a questioning look.

Changbin shrugs. “I was excited.”

“Sweet talking to me isn't gonna work, you know?”

“I don’t have a reason to sweet talk, I’m just being honest.” Changbin’s teeth are white when he flashes them, bright and sincere. He makes talking so easy, like he’s practiced it a thousand times. You like that.

“Well,” you clear your throat, “Where are we going?”

“You’ll see.” Changbin grins, grabbing your hand and leading you down towards his car.

🎳

Changbin, as you come to find out, is full of surprises.

First, he’s ridiculously good at driving. One hand on the wheel, the other mindlessly playing with yours where his hand rests on top of your thigh. The way he maneuvers the car is, well, it’s hot. It’s also really hard to focus your attention anywhere but his hands, especially when you know what they can do.

Second, he’s really, really silly. Most of the usual small talk made on a first date was done over text since it took so long to find a day that both of you were free, but that just made it so falling into step beside one another was that much easier.

Changbin isn’t afraid to sing along with whatever song is on the radio. In fact, he’s actually really good at singing. Well, when he’s not forcing the dramatics and belting at the top of his lungs while he pretends to romantically serenade you in the passenger’s seat. You can’t help but giggle, swatting his hand away when he makes exaggerated gestures in your direction during certain high notes.

Third, he makes your heart flutter. And not just the usual Oh you’re cute kind. No. Changbin makes your heart feel like it’s going to melt into the floor, all of your senses hyper aware of every part of him, wanting and craving more even when he’s right next to you.

He makes you laugh at unexpected times, encourages you to keep speaking if you ramble on for too long about something completely random, and his smile—oh man. Maybe Felix was right to be worried. Not about you messing up, but about you being absolutely head over heels for this guy.

By the time Changbin pulls into an empty parking spot, the two of you have settled into a natural back and forth that has your head reeling with how much fun it is.

“A bowling alley?” you ask, turning to him. Changbin turns the car off, stares at you in expectation. “You spent, like, five minutes telling me that you were taking me to the one place you feel most at home and it’s a bowling alley?”

“Woah, hold on. Are you mocking me?” Changbin smiles again, and suddenly nothing else matters.

“No I’m just—I feel bad.”

His eyebrows furrow. “Bad? Why?”

“I’m gonna, like, kick your ass at this. You know that right?” You say, chuckling.

Changbin stares at you for a moment, and then he’s laughing. A high pitched, steady trill of laughter that sends you into your own fit of giggles just from the residual joy that’s oozing out of him.

Once he’s composed himself enough, he points a finger in your direction, “Oh you are so on.”

The alley is pretty empty, the only other bowlers being at a far lane at the end of the building. Changbin takes the liberty of paying and grabbing both of your shoes, and you silently follow behind him as he leads you to your assigned lane.

“Weight?” he asks, tying his laces.

You glance up from your own shoes, watching as he shucks off his jacket. His arms flex nicely under the material of his shirt, straining against the fabric as he ties a knot.

“Huh?” you ask, not entirely present.

Changbin stands, smirks slightly. “What ball weight do you use?”

“Oh, uh, an eight please.”

He nods and disappears off towards the racks of balls, leaving you alone to scold yourself.

“Christ. Get a grip.” You mumble, smacking your forehead lightly with the palm of your hand.

It’s been a while since you bowled. When you were younger, your dad used to take you every once in a while and marvel at how good you were. That was a long time ago, when you had the time to enjoy things rather than work nonstop to keep yourself afloat. It’s kind of bittersweet being back in an alley, different circumstances but still the same familiarity.

Changbin comes back with two balls in his hands and places them on the ball rack. He glances over to where you’re keying in the names, smiling softly when he notices that you put him down as BIN.

“Ready to have all of your hopes and dreams crushed?” you ask, knocking your shoulder with his.

Changbin fakes a stumble, rubs his arm like you full on punched him. “Oh God, I don’t think I can play now.”

“Nice try sweetheart,” you scoff, picking up your ball just as the screen signals for the game to start, “Watch and learn.”

You move up to the beginning of the lane, trying to ignore the way Changbin whistles playfully when you do. The ball fits perfectly in your hand, round and smooth. One deep breath, you pull your arm back, slowly walk forward, and bend at just the right moment to send it off with a thud as it hits the lane. You watch with your breath held, hope that you’re able to prove you’re not all talk, and smile proudly when the ball goes crashing through the center pin, knocking them all out.

Changbin’s jaw is on the floor when you turn around. “Your turn, hot shot.” You say sweetly, patting his shoulder as you plop down in the seat next to him.

He clears his throat. “Alright.” He grunts, stretching his arms for dramatic effect. He lets out a loud yell, one of those Hoo! noises that people make before they’re about to do something crazy.

As he lines up to go, he turns, kisses his hand and blows it in your direction. “This one’s for you!” He shouts, winking when you hide your face in your hands out of embarrassment.

You watch as he rolls it forward, leans his body to the left when it curves way too far to the right, and then your hand is flying to your mouth to stifle your laughter when the neon pink ball goes straight into the gutter.

“Ah!” He screams, throwing his hands up and behind his head. He whirls around, points an accusatory finger in your direction, “You did this!”

“Me? What’d I do?”

“You distracted me!”

“I did not!

“How am I supposed to focus when the most beautiful girl in the world is watching me?”

“I—” you scoff, fighting the blush on your cheeks as Changbin walks toward you with a shit-eating grin, “Shut up. Stop that.”

“Stop what?” He crouches in front of you, trying to catch your eyes when you avert his gaze.

“Stop sweet talking. That’s a violation of the game rules. Cheating. You’re trying to distract me.”

“Trying to distract you or trying to get you to fall head over heels for me?”

You blink, “You don’t have to try and do that.”

Changbin searches your eyes for a long while, like he’s trying to decipher whether or not you’re being sincere. It looks on his face is one of disbelief, like it’s hard for him to be convinced that you reciprocate any of what he feels.

“Now who’s sweet talking?” He laughs.

“I’m not sweet talking, I’m just being honest.”

“That’s my line!”

“Well,” you say, standing to take your turn, “I wasn’t gonna steal your bad bowling skills was I?”

The game continues on after that. Changbin somehow manages to score three more gutterballs until you decide to take pity on him.

“Here, like this,” you say, walking up behind him. Changbin freezes when you press yourself up against his back, your hand steady on his forearm as you adjust his positioning.

“This is a little—”

“What? Don’t like it?” You giggle.

He clears his throat, “Quite the opposite, actually.”

When he sends the ball straight into the middle of the pins, earning his first strike of the night, he can barely contain his excitement as he yells, picking you up and spinning you around while you laugh and throw your arms around his neck.

It feels like floating, being with Changbin. He’s goofy and sweet and he knows exactly how to push your buttons all while making you feel as though you’re the only girl in the world. His smile is as bright as the sun and the way his eyes lock on to yours at any given point in time have you wishing you could lose yourself in them forever.

🎳

In the end, you win. It’s not a surprise to either of you, but Changbin couldn’t be bothered to care less. It doesn’t matter to him, not when he feels like he’s won the lottery every time you smile in his direction. And if that wasn’t enough, when you silently slip your hand into his as the two of you walk back to the car, he swears that he’s the richest man alive.

The feeling is mutual for you, too. Changbin has a way of making you feel like nothing else exists, not when he’s grinning at you from ear to ear and making you laugh so hard your stomach hurts. He’s unprecedented, a stroke of good luck, someone who came into your life when you least expected it.

Changbin, to you, is uncharted territory. He laughs loud and smiles unabashedly. If there’s a lull in conversation he’s not afraid to fill it with one of his many noises or silly dances. He says what he thinks and doesn’t care if it’s too cheesy or makes your cheeks turn just a shade darker with embarrassment.

Changbin is consistent; the first guy that hasn’t thrown you for a loop when it comes to figuring out who he is and what he likes. Changbin is someone you could see yourself falling in love with, one terrible pick up line at a time.

“So…” he says as soon as he walks you to your front door, “I had fun.”

You laugh, glancing down at where he has your pinkies linked on both hands. He’s so cute, everything about him. Changbin, Changbin, Changbin.

“Mmhm, it was really fun teaching you how to bowl.”

Changbin groans, leans his head against your front door. “I was under pressure.”

“That’s okay, I thought it was cute.”

“Hm. Does that mean I didn’t ruin my chances at a second date?”

“Depends,” you say, moving your hands up to clasp behind his neck. Changbin’s immediately fall to your waist, almost like second nature. Right, right, right. Everything feels right. “You could come inside and show me if it’s worth it or not.”

“Jesus,” he mumbles, “Don’t do that. You’re gonna drive me crazy.”

Changbin’s words are slow, each one more breathless than the last. It’s almost intoxicating.

“Maybe I want that.”

“Good,” he whispers, leaning down to brush his nose against yours in silent question, “Because I’ve been crazy about you since the moment I first saw you.”

When his lips finally connect with yours, you’re thankful for the grip he has on your waist that prevents you from stumbling. Sweet like the syrup he bought for you that first morning, kissing Changbin is like nothing you’ve ever felt before. It’s not hurried or messy; it’s not done with the intent of something more to be given. It’s slow, purposeful, Changbin takes his time like he’s worried if he doesn’t you might break right beneath his fingertips.

He hums softly when you tangle your fingers in his hair, pulls you closer until you’re flush against him. Chest to chest, heart to heart—Changbin holds you like he never wants to let go.

When you finally pull away, his eyes are glossy, shining with adoration. You could get used to that.

“So you don’t want to come inside?” You ask again, smiling when he bites his lip.

“Not tonight babe, it’s only the first date. I don’t put out like that.”

You scoff. “Yeah? Well you definitely put something somewhere when I was—”

Changbin cuts you off with a palm over your mouth. “What kind of pancakes do you want tomorrow?” He laughs.

“Mmrrnnf.” You say, muffled his hand. When he removes it, you push your lip out into a pout. “I don’t want pancakes—just want you.”

Changbin closes his eyes, takes a deep breath, and then lets his forehead fall against yours. “You’re making it really, really hard to hold myself back right now.”

You giggle, jutting your lips forward to give him a quick kiss. “Good, it’s working.”

He sighs. “Second date, and then maybe we can talk about…other things. But right now, I just want you to enjoy this. Let yourself settle with the fact that I really, really like you. This wasn’t just a one night stand for me, nor did I ever want it to be.” He plants a kiss on your nose, “I’m kind of, like, crazy about you.”

“Me too,” you say quietly, “About all of it. I want to keep seeing you, Bin. I want to see where this goes.”

Changbin beams. “Good.” He leans down to kiss you one last time, nothing more than a press of his lips to yours, but it’s more full of emotion than the last.

When he pulls away and starts walking backwards to head back down to his car, he feels like he’s on top of the world.

“I’ll text you in the morning?”

You nod. “I’ll be looking forward to it.”

“Good,” he says with a wink, “The pancakes are on me.”

There’s a tug in your chest at his words. It’s crazy how something so small, something so simple can make you feel so strongly for someone. But you guess that Changbin is just like that.

And when you open the door, Felix’s entire body falling over the threshold from where he was leaning against it, you can’t even be bothered to get mad.

[tags: @palindrome969 @summergirlsmj @n1staytiny @strwbrrychannie @drhsthl @shays-library @giuliadesu @jisunglyricist @itsgghowitsgg @snowyquokka @caitxx1 @skzstarnet] **colored tags indicate my inability to link your account. this could be due to an error when you filled out the google form or you do not have tags on.

#🔖 for later

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txaritsa · 23 days ago

Text

𝔩𝔦𝔎𝔢 𝔩𝔬𝔳𝔢𝔯𝔰 𝔡𝔬

⭒˚‧♱ pairing: ceo!seochangbin x fem!reader ⁺‧₊˚ ♡ summary: Your new boss is quite interesting, so the night lends itself to a few drinks and the discovery of never-before-explored bodies in such an inappropriate but magnetic act. ₊ ⊹⋆ 𝒈𝒆𝒏𝒓𝒆 — 𝒘𝒂𝒓𝒏𝒊𝒏𝒈𝒔: MDNI, smut, dom!changbin, sub!reader, dilf!changbin, oral sex, praise, deepthroat, fingering, sir kink, pet names (some dreg), overstimulation, multiple orgasms, choking, spanking, tit slapping, unprotected sex, creampie, cheating, adultery, implied age gap. word count: 7.5k

♬⋆.˚ like lovers do by hey violet

(𝗸𝗶𝗻𝗸𝘁𝗼𝗯𝗲𝗿 '𝟮𝟰) - 𝔴𝔢𝔫𝔱𝔬𝔟𝔢𝔯 ₊˚🕯️♱‧₊˚. 03: lover

movie inspo: the housemaid (2010)

You didn’t have to feel ashamed, even though a part of you did, you were young and the job was temporary while you tried to establish yourself and get a better one, besides, you would live there for a while and you would stop bothering your parents in the meantime since you still lived with them, your siblings would stop bothering you telling you that you were already an adult and you should look for your own life and stop depending on your parents, stop bothering you while they rubbed on your face their orderly and balanced life.

It was not a desperate action, it was a decent job with excellent pay, only that the thin stigma of it all made you somewhat nervous, you were naive, young and had a lot to lose if you did not start working now so your best option for the moment was to accept the offer of practically a stranger in whom you trusted, Kang Gahyeon, a housekeeper who had been working practically all her life for a particularly rich family, the Seo.

Gahyeon was an acquaintance of the housekeeper of your former female professor at your university in your senior year. You met your teacher casually one night and, among certain confessions you told her that life was being hard on you and she somewhat embarrassed suddenly blurted out that a wealthy young family she knew needed a nanny to stay at home to take care of their little 6-year-old daughter as the wife was very pregnant of 35 weeks; that if you were interested she could pass on the contact to you as she knew you had experience babysitting children as you used to do it as a little extra job while you continued with your studies.

You thought about it for a while and then agreed without further ado, then you met Gahyeon, who gave you the general details of the family and the kind of work involved; you really thought you would be a simple babysitter, but in your teacher’s vague words, she forgot to mention that the whole job was as a housemaid.

You overthought it again, maybe because just thinking about it seemed slightly humiliating, serving rich people while wearing a uniform, something too old-fashioned to be real, you hadn’t even taken the time to think that there are still such jobs, that people still dress and are disciplined before with much more wealth and social status people. But you felt trapped and the pay was so tempting, even though part of you thought it was logical that it was since you didn’t know what kind of people those with so much power really were.

You accepted naively, with a six-month contract, at least the time needed while the mother-to-be focused on taking care of the babies and you helped them with the little one. You accepted, even when your mother told you that you could wait and look for a better job offer that did not resort to the old systems, which were still very much in place today, of social oppression. You called her an exaggerator, telling her that Mrs. Kang claims that the Seo are nice, somewhat cold, but they are decent. You took the job believing it would be a bit of your beginning of independence and adulthood.

And there you were, in the huge, beautiful mansion in the hills that would be your sort of home for the next few months, or at least a spacious room next to little Dahae’s room.

You stood still in your place, watching Mrs. Seo with surprise, Seo Haeun, doing yoga and pelvic floor exercises with the help of a young instructor. You fixed your gaze on her big and notorious uncovered pregnant bump, it looked like she was going to explode and it was true in a way, Haeun was expecting twins. She ended up tired and panting as the yoga instructor helped her to stand up and then she sat on the couch catching her breath as Mrs. Kang stood beside her to pass her water to drink.

You watched her, with your hands clasped together in front of your body, Haeun was beautiful, she was one of those women whose huge belly and big breasts made her look even prettier, her hair was straight, dark, silky mid-length, her eyebrows straight, small and youthful heart-shaped face, big eyes, button nose and round plumpy lips, she was like a little doll, the kind of beauty you want to keep just to yourself. Haeun was a model, but overseas. She sipped from the water as she stared at you, standing in front of her from a distance.

You introduced yourself to her, saying it was a pleasure.

“Welcome” she said to you, handing the glass of water to Gahyeon, “Well Mrs. Kang recommended you, you must be good. She will tell you what to do and show you around. Dahae should be here at 1:30 for you to meet her, take care of her, and help her with her homework. You can go to see your room and change your clothes.”

She was direct, her tone and expression were monotone, and you saw the slight sheen of sweat on her forehead and breasts one last time before following Gahyeon to your new room. She handed you your uniform clothes, all black and white, skirts and dresses; you bit your lip still unsure if wanting to serve a rich family was the kind of job you were looking for... but you were already there.

“Do I have to wear heels?” was what you said with a smirk as you saw three pairs of black silhouette heels, and then you saw the exact same shoes on Mrs. Kang.

“The clacking of the heels is what keeps them alert to know every place you’re at and that you’re not loitering where you shouldn’t.”

Minutes later you were ready, looking at yourself in the mirror with a blank mind, thinking that at least the uniform was tailored for you, the skirt fit your silhouette and was just mid-thigh length. This would be your new life, a distraction, and a new beginning.

You helped Mrs. Kang cook and at exactly 1:25 p.m. you went outside the house to wait for the little Seo girl who arrived seven minutes later in a black car accompanied by serious men dressed in suits that looked like bodyguards.

You smiled at the sight of the little girl who was looking down at the ground and had no expression. Her eyes were just as big as her mother’s but the rest of her face looked different, maybe she looked like her father. Dahae almost overlooked you but raised her gaze as she walked near you.

“Hi, I’m Y/n, I’ll be your new babysitter” you told her cheerfully, gently touching her shoulder so she could give you her backpack.

“Nice to meet you, Y/n. I’m Seo Dahae” the little girl replied, in a monotone tone, and continued her walk home as if nothing.

You followed her somewhat hurriedly and confused, the girl had a warm and kind look but her attitude was completely cold and distant.

“You can change and get ready to go downstairs to eat with your mother, okay?” you said, following her to her room.

“Okay, thank you, Y/n. I can change by myself.”

You smiled at her, feeling like you were looking at and talking to a small adult, her appearance was innocent because she was small and she was a child... but there was something about her that made you insecure, she was serious, quiet and so far you’ve only seen her blink as if she was disconnected to her childhood. You left her backpack in her room.

“I’ll be outside if you need anything and for us to go downstairs together.”

You didn’t think she would be a difficult child, after all, she was just a child, plus you thought growing up with money was a somewhat different experience than what you knew in your childhood, evidently.

The day was normal, after lunch, you cleaned up, and you helped Dahae with her homework, took little orders from Haeun, and watched from afar her little routine like a pregnant wife who spent all day at home. At dinner once again it was just Haeun and his daughter at the table while Gahyeon blurted out a little comment on the air saying that Changbin will be late tonight.

You knew little about them, it really didn’t cost you anything to google their faces or occupations but you were so immersed in your mild embarrassment that you decided not to and played the little game of seeing their faces for the first time in person. You knew that Gahyeon had been working for the Seo’s for a while now, she first worked for the parents of your new boss, Seo Changbin, she practically raised Changbin and was his nanny and as soon as he got married, she followed him to his new home, now working for his family, having a long history with the Seo.

You had dinner in the quiet company of the slightly old housekeeper woman, cleaned everything up, and were ready to end your day when the sound of the doorway alerted Mrs. Kang’s senses.

“He’s here.”

Was all she said and walked out of the kitchen. You blinked in confusion, hesitating whether to follow her but the ideal was to do so, so you hurried your pace behind her but Gahyeon was already standing well to the side of the entrance of the house.

“You don’t always have to greet me, Mrs. Kang, it’s late, you can go to rest” you heard a man’s voice and saw him pass by as soon as you stood next to your co-worker.

The man did not notice your presence and continued on his way, Mrs. Kang went after him and you followed her again.

You fleetingly saw the man’s back, wide arms, gray suit, and short black hair, quickly deducing with obviousness that it was your boss, Mr. Seo Changbin.

You followed her into the living room, where you finally appreciated your boss fully. He sat on the couch, sighing slightly wearily as he unbuttoned his suit jacket.

“Daddy!” happily exclaimed Dahae who was watching some TV before going to bed, rushing over to hug her father.

You were surprised for a second as it was the first time in the day you saw Dahae smile, sound, act, and look like a real six-year-old. You knew immediately that her relationship with her mother was slightly cold and distant. Changbin smiled broadly reciprocating his daughter’s hug and giving her a resounding kiss on the cheek.

“Hey, there, what are you doing up this late? You have school tomorrow,” he said tenderly.

“Daddy, have you met Ms. Y/n? She’s my new nanny, I like her, she’s nice.”

Dahae settled her little body next to her father as a confused expression formed on his face. You blushed at the little girl’s confession, you were happy to be able to like her.

“Y/n?” Changbin looked around in confusion.

And there you were, standing at Mrs. Kang’s side. He caught your gaze and before you could say anything your co-worker stepped forward to speak.

“This is Y/n, sir. Your new employee.”

Changbin grimaced a little as he heard Gahyeon speak formally to him and refer to him as sir, when he thought their relationship was already closer for all the years she worked for him.

“Nice to meet you. I am Dahae’s father, Seo Changbin. I hope you feel comfortable in the house.”

“Nice to meet you, sir” you replied shyly almost in a whisper.

Submissiveness and excessive modesty made you blush a little, usually you were a submissive person, you pleased others and tried to always be as nice as possible and at least now you would earn money for that.

Changbin gave you a small smile and you saw the details of his face, alluring sleepy eyes, straight nose, and featherly lips. He also watched you thinking that he had never had another maid this young before, most of them had been ladies with children in their thirties. He sighed, interrupted his thoughts, and went on to say:

“Now that Dahae has a babysitter, I’d like you to accompany her to school and pick her up.”

You nodded, biting your lip slightly nervously.

“Okay, sir.”

“Alright, little one, let Y/n take you to bed. I’ll go upstairs with your mom” he said again tenderly looking at his daughter and then turned to you again, “Mrs. Kang you can rest now, good night. Same to you, Y/n, as soon as Dahae falls asleep.”

You nodded frantically and approached the little girl, also approaching Changbin and breathing in his strong manly scent of exquisite perfume. You held out your hand and Dahae took it.

“Good night, daddy.”

“Sweet dreams, my girl.”

Changbin pulled his cell phone out of his pocket, acting disinterested but as soon as he had you close he took the opportunity to see you in full view, from the exposure of your legs to your slightly tousled hair bun. You felt his gaze and got nervous, thinking maybe the skirts were a little short.

You finally finished your first day, took a shower, and fell into your bed, tired of wearing heels all the time. You checked your phone before you fell completely asleep, messages from your mom asking if work was treating you well and from your best friend telling you if Seo Changbin was more handsome in person.

─ ⋅ ⋅ ⋅ ──── ♡ ─── ⋅ ⋅ ⋅ ──

The next morning you took Changbin’s breakfast to his office where he was comfortably reading the newspaper and then playing the piano for a while. Once again you felt a heavy gaze on you, but you thought you were paranoid.

He only said a soft “Thank you, Y/n.” And he would follow you with his gaze until you walked out of there.

You liked Changbin a little bit… you felt that attraction of which you thought only you felt it. You couldn’t help the fact that it crossed your mind that he was handsome… and if you didn’t know how to control it, and if he didn’t have respect for his wife, something fatal but avoidable could happen, but it was just a silly and passing thought, affairs between a boss and his maid were so typical, but you weren’t like that. You were there to respect them and for the job.

After Haeun and Dahae had breakfast, Haeun kissed her husband goodbye with a kiss and a simple “Have a good time at school” to her little daughter, and you walked her to the car to drop her off at school.

“I’m glad you could drop Dahae off, usually boys did that but… they were boys, nothing like the warmth of another girl for her” Changbin commented as he checked his phone.

You didn’t have much to say and that Changbin could tell, you were of few words.

Dahae was in between the two of you, still it was inevitable for Changbin not to observe your serene face looking out the window, your neck adorned with a thin golden necklace and your chest slightly uncovered by the illusion of cleavage given by your open buttons of your white blouse, he couldn’t help but lower his gaze down to your chest and watch the calmness of your breathing until he lost his sight on your thighs and how your skirt was lifted up. He didn’t want to accept what was happening to him but he was beginning to feel and think it more and more.

They dropped the little girl off first as Changbin changed the direction of travel, usually they would drop him off first but now it was the perfect excuse to have some time alone with you. You got out of the car to walk Dahae to the school entrance where a teacher was receiving them, but then you felt Changbin’s presence beside you, squatting down and waving goodbye to her.

You both got back into the SUV, you tried to fix the length of your skirt and he did nothing but stare at you again; questions flooded his mind, you looked so young, so pretty… why would you work being a simple maid.

He cleared his throat and said:

“I hope you liked your first day.”

You turned to look at him and smiled, it hadn’t been bad, but you had no choice either. You weren’t crazy, but you felt a certain tension in the air, his muscular presence made you nervous, the way his suit fit him drove you slightly crazy, fitted to his strong proportions.

“It was nice.”

“So… how old are you? You look young…” he spoke, staring at you. You answered, not sounding nervous and suddenly he blurted out something that somehow made you tingle.

“And do you have a boyfriend?”

“No” you answered unsure, there was really no one in your life, other than another friend with benefits that… now that you thought about it you missed him.

Mr. Seo left you breathless and slightly aroused, but now you lived under his roof and had no privacy… you wondered if Han Jisung would like to have a fuck again, you needed distraction as you felt out of yourself, plus the good feeling of an orgasm.

He smiled happy to know you didn’t have someone waiting for your caresses, he believed you, your look was so docile and sincere it drove him crazy.

“I was asking out of curiosity, you are very young and now you are practically living in my house maybe you like to go out, I don’t know” he excused himself, “I also hope you are doing well with Haeun’s friends today, anything let me know.”

You had completely forgotten. Mrs. Seo’s birthday celebration with her close group of friends. Tomorrow you would accompany them to their home in the mountains to take care of Dahae and work for them, on Seo Changbin’s wife’s real birthday. Mrs. Kang had told you in whispers that as much as Haeun takes care of herself since her dream was a natural childbirth and as much as she loves to conceive Changbin’s children, millionaires from her womb, she felt slightly insecure about her appearance so she didn’t go out much and ideally would just bring her friends home.

─ ⋅ ⋅ ⋅ ──── ♡ ─── ⋅ ⋅ ⋅ ──

It was certainly a long day, her friends were not equally as decent as Haeun, you felt their slight dismissive glances and the comment behind your back of, “She looks so young, are you sure she's doing a good job?” “I could never have a maid that young hanging around with Chan in the house.”

Haeun answered them with, “She’s nice and gets along well Dahae, plus Changbin is never home, he just comes in to sleep.”

Then they proceeded to judge her because her husband was never home.

You found it amusing how you were suddenly a threat, yes you found your boss attractive, but he was still your boss and you literally just washed his wife’s clothes.

But the real day came which changed everything. Seo Haeun’s birthday, she asked to be in privacy and intimacy in the house near the mountains with her small and dear family; honestly, you were not contemplated on the trip, you started to work on Thursday morning, and weekends were your days off but you barely had two days working so your official break started next week and Haeun took the opportunity for you to go with them and help them a little bit watching Dahae.

Once again, a driver took them there as Haeun claimed that Changbin was too exhausted to drive. You didn’t talk much to Dahae’s parents, you did more with Dahae herself. You took orders of them, took care of the little girl, prepared food for them and felt the tension, sensing the double intentions of Changbin’s closeness as he asked you what you cooked and if you needed help, gently pressing his body to yours, you had liked it, but you had to stop him right away. It wasn’t appropriate or right.

You continued as if nothing, trying to forget what was going on while you started reading a book acting indifferent, while they enjoyed their activities as a family, singing happy birthday to Haeun, eating cake and then opened a lot of gifts that were already in the house, it felt like Christmas, or at least seeing them from afar smiling under the warm light, as a family while she opened gift after gift.

But night came, you put Dahae to bed, read her a story and watched over her sleep for a while until you could go to the guest room, where you again had time for your tormenting thoughts, you got rid of your uniform and made yourself comfortable in your panties, no bra and a small white top loose to your body and breasts. You washed your face with cold water, thinking it was what you deserved after biting your lip and lightly fantasizing about your boss, a handsome millionaire, married and family man. You remembered again his closeness, the light touch of his body as he gently put his hands on your elbows while you chopped vegetables and he gently rubbed behind you, Changbin was crazy and you thought you didn’t know what the fuck was happening to you.

On the other hand, having their little privacy gave Haeun a hormonal burst with an uncontrollable urge to have sex, she was so horny that her husband got ready, drank some of his favorite wine, and lay down next to his wife who was wearing a sexy silk nightgown. Haeun was already feeling insecure, it was awkward to kiss her husband, for her it felt that way, with a huge bump in between, still she found a way to stroke her husband’s cock to get him hard, she was already so aroused and wet, ready to take him so once she felt Changbin’s throbbing penis in her hand, in one swift movement, Haeun slid his cock inside her making her cry out softly, Changbin moaned at the surprise where he felt his member being embraced by his wife’s walls and she began to ride him, turning her back to him.

“Babe, turn around, I want to see your pretty face” Changbin moaned, stroking his wife's back under her clothes.

Changbin couldn’t help but think for a moment of his maid’s young body. Haeun moaned in excitement, feeling her husband’s cock fill her completely but slowly her gasps of excitement were turning to pain, she was starting to feel uncomfortable in addition to the slight embarrassment she had about her physical appearance, ceasing to enjoy sex and creating a huge insecurity that Changbin didn’t want to fuck her like that, but that wasn’t it, both their minds were getting busy.

Changbin noticed Haeun’s behavior, she was suddenly moaning in pain and her movements were small, soft and inconsistent, ceasing to stimulate him sexually, it wasn’t working for either of them, so Haeun, worried and frustrated pulled out of her husband, lying down beside him grievingly.

“I’m sorry” she said, almost on the verge of tears.

Haeun adored Changbin, and loved pleasing him but felt sexually useless once her belly started to grow and grow. She also adored the idea of starting a big family and the desire to carry on the whole Seo dynasty, but her initial plan was only another child at a time, not two which she was unexpectedly burdened with.

“It’s okay, honey, it’s okay” Changbin comforted her, admiring her beautiful and slightly swollen face, but now he was sexually frustrated, his penis was flaccid but the sensations were at the surface, “You can use your mouth...” he whispered to her.

But Haeun refused, she already felt uncomfortable with her body so she was indisposed to more sex. She slept, but Changbin couldn’t, he stared up at the ceiling, naked... hesitating whether he should give himself and seek pleasure tonight or go to sleep.

He stood up, washing himself a bit, evading the thoughts and went back to the room, sitting on the couch while watching Haeun sleep, then started drinking more and more wine getting slightly drunk, but very conscious of his actions.

Changbin sighed and acted slowly on pure impulse, he put on his expensive silky robe, took another clean glass, and walked to your room, psyching himself up that it would only be a one-night stand... that you would extract some of his frustration out of him if you accepted... or he just wanted to have a conversation with someone different, all the time it was all about his work and business, then he would come home and exchange at most 100 words with his wife and then go to sleep, he wanted some fresh air for a second.

It was a cold night in mid-October, the wind was blowing and branches from a dry tree were banging and scraping against your window. After your little crisis, you decided better to enjoy the small comforts of being a guest in the Seo house, your own relaxing bathroom with a bathtub in it, so you immersed yourself in the warm water, relaxing your body and enjoying your solitude, but what you didn’t know was that you were not alone at all.

Changbin entered your room stealthily, making a minimal noise which you suddenly became aware of and immediately thought of Dahae, since the rooms were in the same hallway and maybe she couldn’t sleep.

“Dahae, is that you? I’m in the bathtub” you raised your voice.

Seconds later there was no answer and you sighed, you were with your back backward to the half-open bathroom door, and you thought maybe it was nothing more than a simple sound. But what you didn’t know was that it was your boss, secretly peeking through the half-open door, seeing a bit of your naked body enjoying the bathtub.

Changbin’s body and every one of his senses began to react, he caught a glimpse of your round breasts and soft nipples in the water. He sighed and placed the wine and glasses on a small table in the room.

You were startled again by a noise, which could be heard nearby, and suddenly you felt the fear of a presence in the room. You got out of the bathtub and dried your body, quickly put on your bathrobe and somewhat frightened you went out of the bathroom to the bedroom, 99% sure that it was just your imagination and you were just checking out of curiosity, but you gave a little jump of impression when you found Changbin standing in front of the window drinking a glass of wine, watching you with a dark look and wearing only his underwear with a loose, silky and open purple robe.

You looked at him confused and almost swallowed nervously at the sight of his exposed semi-naked body, the smoothness of his muscular, worked abdomen and his lower body only covered by black boxers.

You were speechless and clung to your bathrobe as underneath you were naked.

“I can’t sleep… let’s have a drink.”

He came dangerously close to you with the empty glass and the bottle of wine in his hands, his eyes on the target, almost seducing you slowly.

You watched him, not wanting to tell him he had to leave. Changbin poured the wine into the glass, swirling it gently and passed it to you. He watched you expectantly, waiting for you to drink it and you did.

“You’re a good girl, I can tell,” he said, happy, handing you more of the wine.

There was no need for so many words in such a heavy atmosphere and tangible tension, you wanted to touch him, to get closer to him… and it was obvious he was dying to do it too.

“And you don’t talk much… why, darling?”

You became agitated at his comment alone and said, “I don’t have much to say…”

“Well I want to know everything” Changbin smiled at you tenderly as the bathrobe looked big for your shoulders, “Everything about you…” he whispered, returning to his game of seduction, but it was you who had him seduced and captivated, “Oh can we not talk too much…”

Changbin was so hard and aroused, the silence overwhelmed him and your submissive posture had him trapped. He took the glass from your hands and you caught his gaze, seeing him with bright eyes that you were about to throw it all away and say yes to everything, at least tonight.

“Let me see…”

Changbin murmured, completely lost in desire, tugging at the knot of your bathrobe to remove it slowly and gently, enjoying the sensuality of your body being exposed, the bareness of your shoulders and then the garment opening completely revealing your silhouette, until dropping the garment to the floor.

You bit your lip so fucking aroused, enjoying the strong gaze of your boss on your naked body. He began to caress you, finely tracing a path with his fingertips: from between your breasts, down your abdomen, your mons pubis, your thighs and your inner thighs, tickling the skin of the outer lips of your pussy, almost making you gasp.

“You are so beautiful.”

He babbled, letting himself go as he never had before, almost gasping for breath, appreciating your body and the expressions on your face at the same time. His hand came up, massaging your breasts. Changbin licked his lips, finding your breasts supremely soft and squeezable, your nipples so pinchable, hard and appetizing, responding to every stimulation he gave to them.

A moan escaped your lips as you enjoyed his hand all over your breasts, treating them gently, squeezing them hard, touching them as he pleased.

“Fuck” he gasped, excited, his cock throbbing after hearing your first soft moan, “You like that, sweetheart?”

You felt an infuriating tingling in your pussy that burned inside you. Your face was red, and your breasts and nipples were sensitive to his constant stimulation.

“Y-yes” you answered with difficulty.

He smirked smugly and in one swift movement put the glass and bottle of wine back on the small table to return again to you, your still in place and stunning naked body.

“Would you kiss me, sweetie?” he hissed sizzlingly close to your face.

You nodded without breaking eye contact and rushed at him until you joined your lips in the most passionate and forbidden kiss.

Changbin grabbed your ass and pulled you close to him, feeling the softness of his marked pecs press against your breasts and the stiffness of his cock against your body. You put your arms around his shoulders and hugged him, deepening the act. Both of you were slowly losing your sanity more and more. Changbin kept massaging your ass until he suddenly started to spank it hard, making you moan between his lips and the sound of your skin being slapped hard became present, you were starting to become more intensely aroused.

He tugged gently on your hair, pulling you away from him and leering at you.

“Are you going to be a good girl? Answer me.”

Changbin gave you another spank, exciting you further and you moaned in an audible squeal.

“Shh, sh-sh. We have to be quiet” he spoke again.

You nodded feeling your bottom burn with pain, “Yes…” you replied and the word hung in the air because you didn’t know how to refer to him, whether with honorifics, whether to call him by name, he noticed.

“It drives me fucking crazy when you follow my orders and call me sir” he blurted out suddenly with a half smile.

Your ears turned red, there was some humiliation but it made you so excited.

“Yes sir” you crooned softly, causing Changbin’s cock to throb in desperation.

“Get on your knees” he ordered you quietly in a thick voice, “And use your mouth.”

You looked him in the eyes for a few short seconds and obeyed his command, your folds slick and your nipples hard, you replied once more, “Yes, sir” only to see his satisfied face.

You sighed half-heartedly, eagerly pulling down his boxers, releasing his hard, slightly thick cock with its red tip. You were about to take it in your hands, but Changbin came up with something better:

“Ah, ah, just use your mouth, princess,” he said again, “Don’t use your hands. Put them on your thighs.”

You raised your eyes to look at him with big pleading eyes, your mouth salivated and you positioned your face so you could lick his length with just your mouth, feeling his throbbing cock on your tongue. Changbin moaned in pleasure, seeing your submissive position, your hands almost digging into your thighs, only using your mouth to grab and stimulate his erection. He grabbed you by the hair.

“Look at you…you’re a good girl gone bad.”

You looked at him again, it was harder that way, just using your mouth, you tasted him, you wanted to play with his soft glans and seeing you so helpless, made Changbin take the base of his cock and guided it into your mouth, he moaned, self-pleasuring himself in your cavity, resenting the softness of your cheeks and pushing himself deeper and deeper until he reached your throat. You whimpered with his cock in your throat, about to move your hands, but remaining submissive and obeying what he said was igniting every part of your body. Your tears began to flow, you clenched your thighs in desperation as your pussy still throbbed for action.

“Ah, fuck, you take my cock like a fucking slut” he moaned, grabbing your hair and starting to gently thrust into your mouth, “Touch yourself, your little whore, fuck.”

You looked up at him again in supplication and your trembling hand began to caress your dripping pussy. Changbin continued to fuck your mouth, thrusting in and out of your throat, pounding your tract, leaving you sore and drooling as with your fingers in your vagina you tried to recreate the rhythm of his ramming. He continued to cum in you, shooting his cum into your mouth and abruptly pulling his member out of you, holding it in his hand as he gasped and let out a small shot at the corner of your lips, but you managed to get yourself overstimulated.

“Come here, stand up and sit on the bed” he ordered you.

You obeyed him, taking small embarrassed and excited steps to the bed, you were a mess, eager to have an orgasm.

“Yes, sir” you provoked him, sitting down and lightly caressing your breasts, looking innocently at him, inviting him to come closer.

Your boss undressed completely, dropping his robe to the floor and approached you with his eager erect cock. Changbin wiped your face and kissed you sweetly again, exploring your cavity, tasting a bit of himself and as you parted for lack of air with swollen lips, he practically pushed your body so that you fell back on the bed, in contrast to his warm and nice kiss.

Changbin positioned himself on the bed, spreading your legs and appreciating your shiny, swollen, used pussy, quickening his pulse.

“Look at this fucking pussy, fuck, ahh” he moaned, engrossed at the sight of your cunt, slapping your vulva in moderate force, making you stir from the excitement and the impact on your sensitive area.

With his left hand, with his soft, manly thumb he attended to your clit, while his right hand brought it to your entrance, inserting three fingers into you slowly, you bit your lip holding back a moan and Changbin waited for you to adjust to the sensation to start playing with your entrance roughly, his hand taking in intense vibrating motions and abusing your cunt, making you squeal and wallow in pleasure. He smiled, seeing how much you were struggling to keep from making so much noise and what could be heard were your soft sighs and the splashing of his fingers in you. You couldn’t take it anymore, you cum once… twice… making a mess and Mr. Seo still kept stimulating you, until he stopped before bringing you to a third orgasm, he appreciated your anatomy again and rubbed his cock in your folds ready to truly feel you.

“You’re so wet, baby fuck, this pretty pussy is ready to be fucked, mmh.”

He pushed into you, stretching your entrance, making you arch your back and enjoying every inch inside you. He began to fuck you hard, manipulating your body to his pleasure, bringing one of his hands to your neck and the other roughly covering your mouth so that only airy choked moans came out of you. You were beginning to see stars, you had never felt this used, dirty and well fucked as your boss was doing it to you… who began to short your breath with a strong hand on your neck. Changbin had never felt this powerful, not even with all the fortune in the world… possessing your body was a completely different experience, which brought him to his most intense orgasm. Turning you into a pair of lovers.

─ ⋅ ⋅ ⋅ ──── ♡ ─── ⋅ ⋅ ⋅ ── By Sunday afternoon you were back at the mansion, there kept being complicit glances between you and Changbin, you were in shock… unable to believe that you had completely given in, it was so wrong, but the connection with Changbin had felt so good.

Returning to your normal life as a maid you rarely saw Changbin again; you gently asked Mrs. Kang if she might know where he was to which she replied maybe in his office. You managed to slip away from Mrs. Kang’s side for a moment and seeing no one around, you took off your heels and walked quietly to his office, you didn’t know what you might say… but something in you wanted to see Changbin again, alone.

His door was half open and you peeked your head in to catch a glimpse of him on a hectic phone call, you admired him, finding him so attractive when he raised his voice and realized he was always working.

You went back to hiding in the wall, stopping yourself and wondering what you were doing… you looked like an immature, deluded little girl. But you weren’t so silly, you knew exactly why you were sneaking back out and looking for him again, you needed him again.

You stopped hearing his voice and out of curiosity you wanted to peek out again, you almost bumped into him as he was about to leave his office. You looked up to see him.

“You were looking for me?” he said in a smug tone and a half smile.

You shook your head frantically, scared looking at him with your docile eyes wide open, making him chuckle at the sight of you with that expression, being caught, your heels in your hands.

“Come here” he said again, holding you tightly by your forearm, pulling you inside.

You almost whimpered at his rough grip but he released you at once, closing the door.

“What is it you were looking for?” he spoke, defiantly, “You must be here and coming back because you want something… what do you want?”

Changbin moved dangerously close to you, almost pushing you into the door.

“What are you playing at…?” he muttered through his teeth.

He was already pinning you against the door, it was driving him crazy the way you were acting like a frightened little creature about to be devoured. His nose brushed yours and his right hand began to caress your thigh, slowly moving up to under your skirt. Your breathing began to hitch, you were so anxious and excited for your boss.

“Use your words. Now. Tell me what you want me to do to you.”

Your whole body flipped. You wanted him to come back to make you exhausted and sore, to make you whimper and make a mess. His left hand went around your neck, and his thumb played with your lips, gently dabbing it on your lipstick. You were about to speak, but a loud push from the door interrupted you.

You both separated, stepping away from the door and from each other. Mrs. Kang appeared without knocking and struggled with the door.

“Mr. Seo. Dinner is ready.”

She observed your full body with a cold gaze and noticed that you were not wearing your shoes, the uneasiness of your body, and Changbin’s amused expression. Kang Gahyeon had been working for rich people for decades. It was impossible not to know their every secret and move. She was the real eyes of the house. She was already getting suspicious of the tension between you and Changbin, and she didn’t like it at all.

─ ⋅ ⋅ ⋅ ──── ♡ ─── ⋅ ⋅ ⋅ ──

You were impatient. You’d be lying if you claimed you weren’t waiting for Mr. Seo, but you were already naked on your bed hoping to see him come through your door. You got all ready for him, or at least you fixed your hair, putting it in a nice cute bow and subtly did your make-up, thinking if you should wait for him with a baby doll or completely naked.

Time passed and he didn’t show up, so without realizing it you fell into a sleep, but fifteen minutes later, he finally appeared, wearing his pajamas, white sleeveless t-shirt tight to his body, and blue soft silk pajama pants. Changbin saw you asleep, with your face towards the ceiling, he smiled tenderly and gently pulled off the sheet you were covering your body with, revealing your naked body. He licked his lips and the urge to touch you came over him again, caressing your body finely with the back of his fingers, tickling you and causing you to open your eyes slowly, meeting Changbin’s strong silhouette.

You smiled at him. Thinking he had come to see you… but once again doing so with his whole family around was so risky, but you wanted to convince yourself that the walls of the mansion were thick and you couldn’t be heard.

“You were sleeping, princess” he whispered to you.

You grabbed his hand that was still caressing your abdomen and sat up in your bed, denying.

“I’m awake now” you replied cheerfully.

“Were you waiting for me, little angel?”

The nickname made you shy and Changbin bent his body to be at the level of your face, delicately taking your lips to kiss them, gradually raising the temperature of the situation, taking advantage by grabbing your breasts, squeezing them, and slapping them from time to time leaving you sensitive, sore but aroused, you whimpered a little as his left hand circled around your neck and the other went down to your moisten vaginal lips, stimulating you and inserting two fingers into you, then he pulled your face away from him as he pulled your neck, leaving you missing his lips and looked at you with a perverse smile as he controlled the pleasure of your core.

You whimpered in delight at the pace of his fingers inside you and his thumb caressing the rest of your pussy. On the other hand, Changbin almost cum in his underwear at the sweet sound of your moans and your soft sensitive core receiving his fingers, ecstasy came over you and you took it, collapsing in your first orgasm on his fingers, but he kept stimulating you. Changbin released your neck and began kissing you, moving his mouth down your body, sucking your already sensitive breasts, filling you with a pleasurable wave of pain, he kissed and gently licked your abdomen, still penetrating your insides and exciting you again, until his face leveled with your exposed, swollen pussy, to begin playing with it with his mouth.

“You taste so fuking delicious, fuck” he babbled, licking all over your vulva and sucking your clit.

You moaned, biting your lip to keep from doing it so loud. Changbin savored your first orgasm and more of your fluid coming out of you, you were on the edge, unable to feel anything but pleasure, unable to think of the guilt you should be feeling, to think and stop him, both of you couldn’t stop playing with each other, exploring each other’s bodies secretly.

When Changbin sensed your frustration and overstimulation, he turned your body quickly, to fuck your pussy as he delighted in ramming into your ass, he covered your mouth to hold back the loud grunt that was about to come out of your mouth as you felt him inside you and he lost himself completely in you, satisfied by the sensation of your dripping center consuming his cock. You both sighed and he began to pound into you hard and steady, letting that room hold every gasp and steamy sigh, playing with each other like lovers do.

It was a bad idea to think that no one could hear you, because in the darkness lurked the one woman in the house who knew absolutely everything. The floor of Dahae’s room was above her room, as soon as she heard footsteps she did not hesitate for a second to go and see, so that in the end she confirmed and witnessed the grotesque act that was taking place in your room. An act of infidelity, passion, and lust, coming out of your room the sounds of the moans of both of you and your skins colliding that upset her gradually. The lady who raised Changbin felt disgusted for him, rejection, and contempt for you… she knew that the infidelities of a rich man towards his wife was something almost inevitable, but she never got to think it of Changbin. But she wasn’t going to allow that to go on in that house or outside of it. She had to get rid of you now or expose your little secrets.

𐙚TAGLIST: @rylea08 @hann1bee @iovecb97 @armystay89 @lolareadsimagines @lailac13 @ayyonoona @do-you-remember-summer-127 @wildtokay @korthbum @oddracha @hyune-sssne @velvetmoonlght @shadowhunterathene @compersian @binniesbabe @strayywayy @mallielovssyou @isabel-018 @paborachaslvt @tirena1

#🔖 for later

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txaritsa · 23 days ago

Note

Hey, I saw your requests are open. Would you write something for 3Racha where something sad happens and the reader turns non-verbal to try and cope with it?

It's just a problem that I always have and I would like to know how you think the boys would react :)

3Racha when you’re nonverbal

3Racha Written

Prompt: Being friends with the main producers of a music group had its perks. But when you’re asked to accompany them a certain gathering, you hesitate when you figure out who will be there.

Genre: Angst/Comfort

Gender Neutral Reader

Warnings: Implications of trauma, alcohol and dr*g mention, I don’t think there’s any swearing, reader goes nonverbal.

A/N: I wanted to first start off by saying I apologize it took me a bit to get out. I’ve been in my own slump and I’ve found it super hard to find motivation for anything, especially writing and posting.

I wasn’t sure if you wanted a specific incident to happen where the reader goes non verbal, so I hope this is okay. I also wasn’t sure if you wanted it romantic or not, so I just kind of wrote what felt right in the moment. I tried to leave the situation vague so it could match with anyone’s experiences. I personally don’t like it too much (I honestly hate my writing so it could just be that LOL) so I can make a separate post with a text version, of course it would be a little bit different than this. Please let me know your thoughts 🙏

Requests - OPEN

Masterlist

Please read disclaimer in masterlist

Parties were the absolute worst. If you were forced to choose a least favorite thing on the planet, parties would be it. They’re loud and crowded; Worst of all, he’s always there.

3Racha had been nominated for an award. They had been invited to a big award show, a one where afterparties usually follow. You were incredibly proud of them, knowing just how hard they worked. They meant the absolute world to you, and to see them put their best foot forward and exceed tipped you over the moon. Previously, you’d turn them down when they’d ask you to attend with them, and you had a very good reason. Firstly, parties just weren’t your thing. You never fit in with everyone else growing up. Secondly, you knew that he was going to be there. You didn’t know what to call him. Putting a label on things had never felt right to you before. If someone were to ask him, he’d tell them you were together. But if someone were to ask you, you’d say it was complicated and you were content with how things were. You did that with everyone that seemed to be more than friends with you, commitment was a scary thing. But you did know that he was someone you never wanted to be around ever again.

You remember the way he’d always ask you to accompany him to one. He was the partier in the “relationship.” However, you’d always preferred to stay in. Nice and cozy in your blankets. One night, you decided to try and get out of your comfort zone. You wore something different, and put effort into your appearance. The moment he let his hand “accidentally” linger over your ass was the first sign of a mistake. The night only went downhill from there. Next thing you knew you were drugged and taken advantage of. It took you months to recover, months to find the will to get out of bed. Only Chan out of the three knew of this incident, but only very very vaguely. He only found out because he was the one nursing you back to your normal self again. You avoided giving him details, he doesn’t know the person, time, nor the place. You wanted to stick to using being tired as an excuse to politely turn them down. There was no way you could let them find out that you were just too weak to attend said gathering, especially because they don’t know what happened.

You listened to the boys explain how excited they were for this one. How this was such a big award, and how it was going to be so much different. The excitement that laced their voices made it hard for you to deny the question you knew was coming. “Do you think you could go with us this time?” They knew the answer every time they asked this question. A hesitant no, almost as if you were thinking about it. In reality, your mind was fighting off bad memories. It was hard not to think of it when even the topic was brought up, there’s no way you could bring yourself to revisit the place it happened. He was always going to be there, just like he was at every one while you knew him. Again, parties were his thing. So you were confident no matter which one you attended, he would be there. You were scared, to say the least. Scared of seeing him, scared of being pushed back into that dark room, scared of reliving what had made you feel so lifeless.

However, Han’s unintentional puppy eyes drew you closer and closer to the edge. How you wanted to see them happy. You weren’t sure if it was only platonic or if there was some hint of romantic feelings for them there, but you knew you loved them so much. Although the three knew the usual answer, they still proceeded to ask. They felt as they should always invite you, even if they know what your answer would be. However, this time you surprised them. With a quick purse of your lips, the words fell from your mouth. “Fine, but only this once.” The way their faces lit up when you agreed to go to with them brought a smile to your face. Though it quickly dissipated as your brain grabbed back at those awful memories. The guys were too lost in excitement to notice, but you’d prefer it that way. Everyone else had their own problems, so you hated adding your own on top of them.

The last few nights leading up to the award ceremony were filled with anxiety. Sleepovers with Chan were a mutually agreed way to get both of your minds off of stress. However your anxiety still managed to claw its way through what was supposed to be a comforting barrier with him. Chan was next to you, fast asleep which was something that was rare for him. Meanwhile, you silently cried next to him. Hours passed and you were still unable to fall asleep, too busy fighting off the horrible memories. Horrible memories of a time in your life that left you numb. You couldn’t shake it, knowing that he was going to be there. He was a popular artist, and you’d already checked the lineup for the event. His name was there, and now you were petrified. You couldn’t bring yourself to tell them you changed your mind. They were so excited, so you dealt with it.

The night of the party arrived. You’d isolated yourself for the day, hoping to prepare yourself enough for what was about to come. Hours passed and next thing you knew you were sat between Chan and Changbin on a fancy couch. Despite it being a fancy event, Han sat on the back of the couch with his feet on either side of you, his hands slowly running through your hair. It was a common thing for you to do with the three, often being very touchy with each other. It was to the point where you questioned if you were more than friends. While you didn’t kiss, or do anything beyond that, you were very hands on. Cuddling, hugging, playing with each others hair or outfits, you name it. However, you couldn’t decipher whether it was platonic or if there was a hint of romance in there.

Suddenly, an all too familiar voice snapped you out of the peaceful thoughts that managed to distract you for.. at least a little while. Soon enough, your worst fear of the night happened. He placed himself on the couch right across from you guys. The first 20 minutes or so, he had the subtlety evil smirk on his face.

However, you knew it would dissipate sooner or later. Based on your experience with him, he was an extremely jealous person. And given, how important skin-ship was to you and the three boys, it was only a matter of time. It happened when Han noticed you were quieter all of the sudden. His fingers came to a slow stop in your hair to travel down to your shoulder. His head leaning down to your ear to whisper something.

“Are you alright, jagiya?”

It was quiet, quiet enough where only those within a 3 inch radius could hear. So you wonder why you saw that man who you feared, drop his smirk to a frown. Maybe he read Han’s lips and noticed the word ‘jagiya’ ? Either way, you ignored it, and with a nod and a small smile which was noticeably forced, you brushed off Han’s worries insisting you were just tired. Changbin took notice of his member’s concern, and leaned in close to reassure you that the event would be over soon. You gave him the same smile and quietly thanked him.

Thats when he suddenly started staring daggers at you from across the room, his hand clenching onto the almost empty soju bottle. He was drunk, for sure. That had to have been the scariest part. It only added more fuel to the fire, you were silenced. Except nothing was physically stopping you from speaking. Your head dropped down, staring at your nails that now started to dig into the palms of your and in an attempt to quiet the voices in your mind. It was a bad habit you picked up when you got anxious. Recently, it’d been worse so you currently had crescent shaped markings left behind on the center of your hand. Han noticed the tension in your body, and leaned down to express his concern once again.

“Are you sure you’re alright? You’re very tense.”

No response. As much as you wanted to reassure him that everything was okay, you couldn’t. It felt as if your throat was closing up, you couldn’t speak or move. You were anxious, overstimulated and all you wanted to do was jump out of the window. Anything to escape.

Your eyes were now staring daggers into the floor, and your body was completely still. Did you even hear him? He wondered at your lack of response, however it didn’t take long for him to pick up on it. But before he could say anything else, Chan’s hand gently but swiftly grabbed yours. Holding your hands in such a way that your nails couldn’t fight their way through your skin again. Chan was a very observant person, so it didn’t take him very long to notice the marks on your hands. That’s when Han recognized what was going on, Changbin following in their suit not but a few moments later. Once again, Han leaned down to say something. He was well aware that you were nonverbal right now, but he said it anyways hoping you could at least muster the energy to tell him you wanted to leave. You suddenly felt a hand on either shoulder, which were now rubbing soothingly into your tense muscles. “Do you want to leave? Chan still has to say his goodbyes to everyone, but I can take you outside.” This sentence was whispered into your ear, and the word ‘leave’ sparked your attention. You nodded almost too eagerly.

With that, Han motioned for you to stand up, saying something to you excuse yourselves. Chan let your hands slip out of his, looking over at his band mate and Changbin to silently communicate everyone would be leaving soon. You were unsure of what he said, now focused on not making eye contact with a certain someone right across from you. The closer to you that Han got, the more anger you could feel emitting off of the man in front. That only left you more anxious. Suddenly, Han put his arm around your waist gently to guide you out. The anxiety started to die down as you stepped out of the building, but the tears you were fighting didn’t. “You okay?” Han softly questioned as your eyes looked up to meet his. It took him not but a brief moment to notice your glossy eyes. He immediately pulled you in for a hug, which caused you to break down. Still unable to speak, you only mumbled out incoherent words that the male tried so hard to pick up on. Fortunately for him, he was able to make out a few words which told him everything he needed to know.

You felt unsafe is what it was. Although he wasn’t sure why, it was a step. Han would be lying to himself if he said he didn’t sense anger and tension in the room. The reason was what he couldn’t figure out. His head rested on yours, gently rocking you back and forth hoping to calm you down. Suddenly the door opened, but you remained still. As Chan and Changbin walked over, your breathing began to slow down. “Sorry n/n, I did my best to get us out as soon as possible. They don’t know when to shut up.” Chan apologized and rubbed his hand up and down your back. “Come on, we’ll talk later. Let’s get her out of here.”

Once you all arrived home, everyone went to their dorms. Except you stayed back at Chan and Jeongin’s. Although the younger was in the middle of a brand deal, which left you and the latter alone in the dorm. The trio agreed it would be better if you stayed with one of them for the night, so they decided on the leader’s as it would be the calmest. Your body lay next to him on his comfortable mattress, the lights set to a soft and comforting purple color with the tv playing a movie on the lowest volume. The male laying next to you, with his hand running up and down your back. Your eyes followed the movements of the character on the screen, but your brain wasn’t absorbing any of the plot. It was obvious this was a difficult night for you, but Chan just had to know.

“Feel free to not answer, I know you’re still not in a talking mood..” He led on, and your head raised to make eye contact with him. “Was that the guy… from you know.”

You did know, you knew exactly what he was talking about. Your facial features remained still, looking back and forth between both of his eyes as you mustered up the energy to get some form of response out. With that, you only nodded before turning back to the movie. Chan could swear he felt his heart break and everything suddenly clicked in his mind. If he had known it would only cause you anxiety, then he wouldn’t have pestered you to go for so long. “I am sooo sorry y/n.” His other arm found its way around you as he rested his head on yours. “We wouldn’t have pressed so hard if we knew what was going on.”

Although you didn’t respond, your hand found its way to his and gave him a light squeeze to reassure him that it was okay. “I know I don’t know the whole story but you can always talk to me about how you’re feeling, alright?” A small smile formed on your lips and your head nodded against his, nuzzling further. He let out a light and squeaky giggle as he ran his fingers over your knuckle gently. It was in this moment that you realized it was all going to be okay.

#🔖 for later

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