totally-real-haikyuu-quotes

[totally-real-haikyuu-quotes]

[Yukigaoka Junior High School]

Kageyama: Please teach me how to be a better setter!

Oikawa: I’m not interested in you in that way.

Kageyama: In what way?

Oikawa: Pick one.

[totally-real-haikyuu-quotes]

Koganegawa: Hinata said there were no bad ideas!

Futakuchi: Well, he was wrong.

[totally-real-haikyuu-quotes]

Coach Ukai: I need all of you to be straight with me

Daichi: [looking at the others] That’s going to be extremely hard for everyone here

[totally-real-haikyuu-quotes]

Yachi: God having a crush on someone is EXHAUSTING it’s been like 4 days and I’m already OVER IT

[totally-real-haikyuu-quotes]

Akaashi: So, how did the day go?

Kuroo: Kenma wanted to eat ice cream for breakfast and when I told him, he couldn’t, he said I wasn’t his best friend anymore so we made a compromise

Akaashi: Which is?

Kuroo: He's at his second bowl of ice cream and I’m now his best friend in the whole universe

[totally-real-haikyuu-quotes]

Kenma: If you consider eating two bags of popcorn and toaster waffles for dinner at 10:30 a nutritious meal plan, then I am the epitome of health

[totally-real-haikyuu-quotes]

Lev: Oh, please, you wouldn’t hurt a fly!

Yaku: You’re right! Because a fly is an innocent creature that never knowlingy did anything to anybody. You, however, I would maim

[totally-real-haikyuu-quotes]

[late night conversations at training camp]

Nishinoya: I want to be a reverse Tooth Fairy where I rob people and then scatter human teeth on their bed!

Kageyama: A dentist?

Tanaka: I don’t know what your dentist is doing to you, but I think you need to go to the police

[totally-real-haikyuu-quotes]

Kenma: [crying] I can’t see you anymore. I won’t let you hurt me again.

Kuroo: Kenma. It was a sit-up. You did one sit-up.

[totally-real-haikyuu-quotes]

Tsukishima: [puts on headphones without turning on music]

Yamaguchi: What are you listening to?

Tsukishima: Not our classmates

[totally-real-haikyuu-quotes]

Spotify: [depressing emo song comes on]

Kuroo: a fucking BOP

[totally-real-haikyuu-quotes]

Aone: I'm sorry for psychologically scarring you.

Asahi: Which time?

[totally-real-haikyuu-quotes]

Tanaka: I wanna be a cool unshakable asshole, but instead I do one nice thing for an old lady and have to struggle not to cry when she thanks me.

[totally-real-haikyuu-quotes]

Yamaguchi: Hey Tsukki? 

Tsukishima: Yeah? 

Yamaguchi: what does Y-E-S spell? 

Tsukishima: Yes. 

Yamaguchi: Okay, what does E-Y-E-S spell? 

Tsukishima: E-yes 

Yamaguchi: *holding back laughter* No, Tsukki. What does E-Y-E-S spell? 

Tsukishima: I already told you E-yes! 

Yamaguchi: *actually laughing now* No! W-what does E-Y-E-S spell? Tsukishima: *getting frustrated* E-YES!

 Yamaguchi: *doubled over* T-Tsukki, E-Y-E-S spells EYES!

 Tsukishima: … 

Tsukishima:

[totally-real-haikyuu-quotes]

Hinata: I want to kiss you

Kageyama: Okay, anything else you want to do?

Hinata: Pass English

[totally-real-haikyuu-quotes]

Hinata: Hey Kageyama?

Kageyama: Mmm?

Hinata: there are 21 letters in the alphabet right? 

Kageyama: ….There are 26 letters in the alphabet how do you not know this-

Hinata: Oh right! I forgot! U R A Q T!

Kageyama: *still ranting* it doesn’t matter which letters you forgot oh my god 

Hinata how did you not know there are 26 letters in the alphabet you’re not THAT stupid!

-three hours later- Kageyama: *lying in bed* *bolts upright* oh my god wait U R A Q T = YOU ARE A CUTIE H I N A T A

[totally-real-haikyuu-quotes]

Hinata: Standing next to sunflowers always makes me feel weak like, "Look at this flower. This flower is taller than I am! This flower is winning and I am losing!"

Yamaguchi: You are not ready to hear about trees then...