toomuchofabastard

[toomuchofabastard]

[toomuchofabastard]

TW for mention of sexual violence.

Do you have any recs for rape recovery fics? I have read Repossesion by dreamsofspike, and it was good, so I am looking for something similar.

Mind the tags on ALL of these, folks! Here are some rape recovery fics...

Put It On A Shelf by mix_kid_ao3 (M)

Hands holding him, scratching him, hurting him. Pulling and pinching, taking things Crowley never wanted to give—still doesn’t want to give. And he supposes that was the point, wasn’t it? Everyone wants to give and take this particular something. Everyone except him. It‘s a natural part of being a demon, there’s a reason it’s one of the easiest forms of temptation. Crowley wakes kicking.

It goes like this, the catch, the grip by Anonymous (E)

Crowley goes to a party in Hell, and has a traumatic encounter with a powerful demon. Two-thousand years later, Aziraphale tries to understand.

In the Afters by OneofWebs (M)

Aziraphale has been enduring Sandalphon's abuse for centuries. He's become so used to it, he's almost gotten himself to believe that things are fine. When Sandalphon does the unthinkable, and Aziraphale finds himself pregnant--he finally decides that it's not fine. In a sudden rush of freedom, Aziraphale tells Crowley everything. In the aftermath of it, he finds that Crowley doesn't care about the past: only the future that they can share.

What I Am by Anonymous (E)

Aziraphale knows what he is, in Heaven. He’s dirty, and tainted, and easy. He’s good for working off stress. He’s a lower angel, a demoted Cherub banished to Earth and forbidden from saying no. He’s Gabriel’s favourite, though he doesn’t understand why. He knows all too well what he is. But it doesn’t matter. Because Heaven is good, and all that they do must be good in return. No matter how much it hurts, no matter how much he hates it. Heaven cannot possibly be wrong. Right?

I'd Do It Over Again (To Keep You With Me) by the_sinnamon_roll_writes (M)

Crowley has some bad (and repressed) memories of some of his time down under, and Aziraphale wants to help when he finds out. I struggled a bit with the rating here- there are no graphic descriptions of non-con (nothings even actually stated, really), but it is implied that it might've happened in the graphic descriptions of torture. I'm not sure that it warranted that tag, but I decided to play it safe and include it.

Stress Relief by Fanlan (M)

Gabriel likes to use Aziraphale to work out pent out frustration and anger, often leaving the Principality bloody, bruised and psychologically scarred.

And the one you mentioned...

Repossession by dreamsofspike (E)

Crowley and Aziraphale's clandestine love affair has spanned the past fourteen years, with Heaven and Hell none the wiser. Or so they thought. Angel and demon alike quickly learn that Heaven can be far crueler than Hell.

- Mod D

[toomuchofabastard]

We all know never* to play 'is there any way in which I would ever actually write that trope/ship/etc. that I don't really like' because you will come up with a way and then want to write it, but

*not really, it's fun. and good for you.

tw noncon / rape under the cut (aziraphale whump), no GOS2 spoilers

I figured out what my take on Aziraphale/Gabriel (solo) non con whump would be years ago and left it at 'yeah, that's the only way I could see that dynamic working**, but I've got other things I'm more interested in writing than adding my take to that particular already-well-covered pool of works' and left it in hypothetical land. That is, until yesterday morning, when I found myself running the scene on to what would happen next, and realised 'oh no, this convo between Crowley and Aziraphale is actually really interesting and covers a dynamic that none of my other planned Aziraphale non con whump works do' aaand now I want to write it.

**this being Gabriel knowing that other people sexually desire Aziraphale and not really getting why, coercing/non-explicitly forcing him into sex to sate his curiousity

I just think it would be very interesting and not something you see super often in noncon whump works if Aziraphale, partly out of shock/confusion and partly as a subconscious coping mechanism, is basically trying to convince himself that what happened with Gabriel wasn't really rape. Because he didn't physically try to fight him off, because he didn't actually say the word 'no', because Gabriel wasn't trying to hurt him, just ignoring his discomfort. Surely it must have been a misunderstanding. And he's uncertainly explaining all this to Crowley, who as ever in my fics*** isn't going to stand for Aziraphale trying to victim-blame himself, and therefore has to point out all of the reasons why all that^ is bullshit and that it was, in fact, rape.

***I am of course refering to a number of fics that I haven't written yet 😅

I picture Aziraphale taking quite a while to really be able to process and accept that as what happened to him, and some time later Crowley finds him hidden in the bookshelves, hunched over and silently breaking down with a hand over his mouth.

Just. Mmm. Yeah. Might be adding another fic to the WIP list lol.

[toomuchofabastard]

The habitual trauma response that I'd planned for Aziraphale in a future fic where he covers his mouth whenever he gets upset/triggered is,, kind of canon now? 😅

[toomuchofabastard]

We all know never* to play 'is there any way in which I would ever actually write that trope/ship/etc. that I don't really like' because you will come up with a way and then want to write it, but

*not really, it's fun. and good for you.

tw noncon / rape under the cut (aziraphale whump), no GOS2 spoilers

I figured out what my take on Aziraphale/Gabriel (solo) non con whump would be years ago and left it at 'yeah, that's the only way I could see that dynamic working**, but I've got other things I'm more interested in writing than adding my take to that particular already-well-covered pool of works' and left it in hypothetical land. That is, until yesterday morning, when I found myself running the scene on to what would happen next, and realised 'oh no, this convo between Crowley and Aziraphale is actually really interesting and covers a dynamic that none of my other planned Aziraphale non con whump works do' aaand now I want to write it.

**this being Gabriel knowing that other people sexually desire Aziraphale and not really getting why, coercing/non-explicitly forcing him into sex to sate his curiousity

I just think it would be very interesting and not something you see super often in noncon whump works if Aziraphale, partly out of shock/confusion and partly as a subconscious coping mechanism, is basically trying to convince himself that what happened with Gabriel wasn't really rape. Because he didn't physically try to fight him off, because he didn't actually say the word 'no', because Gabriel wasn't trying to hurt him, just ignoring his discomfort. Surely it must have been a misunderstanding. And he's uncertainly explaining all this to Crowley, who as ever in my fics*** isn't going to stand for Aziraphale trying to victim-blame himself, and therefore has to point out all of the reasons why all that^ is bullshit and that it was, in fact, rape.

***I am of course refering to a number of fics that I haven't written yet 😅

I picture Aziraphale taking quite a while to really be able to process and accept that as what happened to him, and some time later Crowley finds him hidden in the bookshelves, hunched over and silently breaking down with a hand over his mouth.

Just. Mmm. Yeah. Might be adding another fic to the WIP list lol.

[toomuchofabastard]

really crazy how much i’ve imagined this fic. like it’s soooooo imagined you wouldn’t even believe. not writing it though

[toomuchofabastard]

GOOD OMENS (2019-) "The Ball" (2.05) Requested by @maandarinee

[toomuchofabastard]

"I'm sick twisted and evil" you're literally 5 feet tall

[toomuchofabastard]

(x)

[toomuchofabastard]

Hello, Mr Giaman,

I was just wondering what Aziraphale thinks of people justifying their homophobia with Christianity? I personally, am gay and religious so I think they take out of context to be hateful. But is Heaven homophobic in the Good Omens universe? If it is I won’t be offended as it’s your story and it’s already made clear that Heaven gets a lot of things wrong in the Good Omens universe (as Does Hell).

Sincerely,

C

Well, Heaven definitely smote Sodom and Gomorrah. But people are still arguing over what the actual crimes of Sodom and Gomorrah were.

I'm not sure that anyone in Heaven except possibly Sandalphon, is clear enough on the mechanics of human reproduction or recreation actually to care or even to notice.

[toomuchofabastard]

Is it not enough to intensely daydream a fanfic in painful, emotional and visual detail constantly for over a week? Must I also convert it to doc/word format as well?

[toomuchofabastard]

[toomuchofabastard]

[toomuchofabastard]

i think more of you need to embrace the fact that a character can be a favorite BECAUSE they are a freakish loathsome hateful black-hearted despicable creature, NOT in spite of it

[toomuchofabastard]

My stories would be so goddamn written if only I could write them

[toomuchofabastard]

Thanks for giving me a chance ❤

[toomuchofabastard]

The greatest joy in life is rereading your writing and falling in love with it all over again.