tomatoesarefroots
Harry is my wife
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al // they/he // tpwk // larrie // my art
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tomatoesarefroots · 1 day ago
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tomatoesarefroots · 2 days ago
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Activism is not cold-calling.
Activism is not cold-calling, and this is critically important to understand.
I'm seeing a lot of posts on here about 'building bridges' and 'finding community,' and then (extremely valid) response posts saying "BUT HOW??" And I'm going to explain something that can be very counter-intuitive: there is strategy involved in community.
As a longtime volunteer labour organizer, I’ve taken and taught many trainings on the strategy of talking. Something that surprises a lot of people is the very first thing you do in a union campaign. You sit down with your organizing committee, take out pen and paper, and literally map it out. You draw a physical map of the workplace: where are the entrances, exits, break rooms, supervisor offices. Essentially, ‘where is it safe to have a union conversation.’ Then you draw another physical chart of your coworkers. You sort out who is union-friendly, openly hostile to unions, or somewhere in the middle, and then you plan out very deliberately and carefully who talks to whom and in what order.
Consider: If Vocally Leftist Jane walks up to Conservative David and says "hey what do you think about unions," David is going to shut down immediately. He's not inclined to listen to Jane. But if Jane talks to Moderate Jason and brings him into the fold, then Jason is a far more effective strategic choice to talk to David, and David may actually hear him out without an instant reaction.
IMPORTANT CAVEAT: If Conservative David turns out to be Alt-Right David, and could be dangerous to follow organizers, we write him off. We are not trying to reach Alt-Right David. We are trying to reach Conservative David, who may actually be persuaded to find solidarity with other employees as fellow workers. Jason is a safe scout to find out which one he is. It does no one any good if Leftist Jane (or even Moderate Jane who is a visible minority) talks to Alt-Right David and puts herself on his radar. Not only has she done nothing to convince Alt-Right David to join a union - she's probably actively turned him against the idea - but now she's also in danger and the entire campaign is at risk. NOBODY WANTS THIS. Jane was NOT a hero for doing this. The organizing committee was foolish and enacted a terrible strategy to everyone's detriment.
Where you can make a difference is with people who will listen to you. You having a conversation with your well-meaning but clueless Centrist Democrat Auntie, and maybe gently helping her understand some things the media has been glossing over, is way more strategically useful than you marching up to MAGA Neighbour You've Met Once and trying to "build community" or "understand" them. They don't care. They're impervious, dangerous, and cruel. But maybe your beloved auntie will think about what you said, and then talk to her friend Anna who IDs as "fiscally conservative" but didn't vote because she can't bring herself to get on board with Trump. Then perhaps Anna talks to her brother Nic who has MAGA leanings but isn't all the way there yet. Proto-MAGA Nic would not have listened to you, nor would he have listened to Centrist Democrat Auntie, but he might absorb some of what his sister is saying.
This is not a cop-out or an echo chamber. This is you spending your time and energy strategically and safely. You are not a useful activist to anyone if you’re dead. Anyone who is telling you to hurl yourself directly at MAGA assholes like cannon fodder has no understanding of the strategy behind community building, and you should feel comfortable writing them off.
Last point: If you are tired, emotionally devastated, and/or in danger: take a break. This post is for people who would feel better jumping into action, not for people who are too overwhelmed to even think about it right now. You are worth so much even if you’re not actively Doing Activism, and your rest is worth more than “a break period so you can recharge and Do More Activism.” We all deserve the individual dignity of being worthy of comfort, rest & safety just on the basis of being human, outside of whatever we're doing for others' benefit. To deny ourselves that dignity is to devalue ourselves, and that’s the absolute last thing any of us should be doing right now.
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tomatoesarefroots · 3 days ago
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Hot take, but cis people have gender identities. They aren't the gender they identify as because of their genitalia or what their birth certificate says. They're only cis because they identify with a gender and it happens to match their government documentation. Cis men aren't men because they're "obviously" men for having a penis. They're men because they identify as men. It's the self-identification that dictates this, not any other factor, even for cis folks. And we should be framing it this way. A cis man identifies as a man and a cis woman identifies as a woman. There is no automatic or inherent gender.
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tomatoesarefroots · 3 days ago
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The zoo in my hometown posted this picture of one of their cheetah cubs and I'm obsessed
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HIS NAME IS YAM ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDINF ME
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tomatoesarefroots · 3 days ago
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Chai tea bag + lil but of brown sugar + apple cider packet + 16 oz. mug of hot but not quite boiling water
it will not Fix You but like. maybe. maybe.
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tomatoesarefroots · 7 days ago
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advice from dad
So, my Dad is a 73-year-old Mexican man who has lived here since he was 16. He was in Watts during the riots in 1965; in 1992, when I was in LA, as soon as the Rodney King verdict was announced, he called me, told me what was coming, told me how to stay safe. He has survived horrible living conditions, being kidnapped, physical abuse, prejudice, discrimination. He learned English, got his green card, pays his taxes, works hard, and has three daughters. 
I thought he would be devastated today.
But he wasn’t.
He saw that I was sad and angry, and he asked me why, pretending he had no idea. I almost started crying. And then he said, “no se me chicopale.” 
It means, don’t lose heart. Don’t give in to despair.
I asked him why he wasn’t upset.
He said, basically, “The world has always been this way. There are always people who are afraid, who are racist, who are awful. This is not new. And it will never go away. He won. We can’t do anything about that. All we can do is what we can do. Fight for what matters to us. Take care of each other. And don’t lose heart. And here, I got these unsalted cashews for you and a bag of jamaica drink mix and can you show me how to use the new washing machine because it’s not working.”
And, for reasons I can’t articulate, I feel a little better. 
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tomatoesarefroots · 13 days ago
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impusively kissing! kissing when laughing! kissing cheeks to say thanks! kissing noses! kissing foreheads! kissing hands! kissing wrists! kissing temples! kissing fingertips! lazy kissing! goodbye kisses! see you later kisses! wait for me kisses! be right back kisses! that is so stupid but i love you kissing!
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tomatoesarefroots · 16 days ago
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zayn saved the band by leaving.
let's be honest. he took the hit when he left. he lost so many of his fans then. but you know what he did?
he showed the boys that there was life after one direction.
he showed them that the hell they were enduring was escapable. that they could make it out and still sing and write songs and be happy.
if they'd really been as happy as they seemed to us, they would've come back after the hiatus. they promised us 18 months. its been 9 years.
im sure they loved us with all their hearts. that they enjoyed their time together as a band, as brothers. however, they were exploited and taken advantage of every step of the way.
now, liam's passing is the fucking culmination of the hell they endured. you can't argue with me that the liam of 2011 was SO SO FULL OF LIFE. he had so much promise. you just knew this boy was gonna go places.
but somehow, along the way, his light dimmed. that wasn't the liam we knew. we all subconsiously could see it. that liam hurt so much that he hurt a lot of people. that liam could've done better. that liam should've been given the chance to make amends.
but the young boy that was so full of life, he didnt deserve any of this. he deserved to have been kept safe and away from the shit that could destroy him.
the boys should have been protected and maybe, just maybe, we wouldn't have to endure this devastating loss. maybe, just maybe, liam would still be alive.
i'd take an unending hiatus over this loss any day.
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tomatoesarefroots · 19 days ago
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Ripples from a passing boat on a calm day at Lake Michigan.
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tomatoesarefroots · 1 month ago
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Glimmerati, Claudia Keep
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tomatoesarefroots · 1 month ago
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tomatoesarefroots · 2 months ago
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Steven Universe - Art Nouveau Series by Alexa Rockman
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tomatoesarefroots · 2 months ago
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Thinking so hard about glass aoughh I’m obsessed can’t wait to be back in the studio. Here’s some of my favorite pics from last yr.
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tomatoesarefroots · 2 months ago
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buying stupid things that you would die to have as a kid really does heal something inside you
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tomatoesarefroots · 2 months ago
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this is for all the gay trans men: there are gay/bi/pan/queer men who will be attracted to you. there are probably queer men who are attracted to you right now. i know the gay community might feel hostile towards us, but there are those who will see you as a real man and find you attractive. trans AND cis. and those who are kind of in between. you are wonderful, you are beautiful, you are attractive and you're infinitely worthy of love. don't give up on yourself.
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tomatoesarefroots · 2 months ago
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Unmute !
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tomatoesarefroots · 3 months ago
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The duality of man is thinking “children cannot help themselves and we all need to be patient with them as they explore what it means to be human in public” and also “damn, I wish this crying baby was not on the plane rn :/“
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