threehandsoneheart

[threehandsoneheart]

Restoration

One woman and her last-minute attorney filed into a conference room. A large wooden table with a dozen chairs, bottles of water and ink pens in the center. Two suited men sitting very seriously in front of four-inch thick stacks of paper bound neatly with file clips waited sternly. Two rose to shake hands with my attorney and regard me awkwardly. One offered his hand, the other sat without…

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The Adventure Continues!

Never Less Than Everything is moving to a self hosted site on BlueHost.

If you are a follower you should not notice anything different, as BlueHost and WordPress are fully integrated. BlueHost will just allow us to offer more and also give us more creative control over the site and it’s content. There will still be several days of weeding through site content, repairing any broken links,…

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Author's note about coming changes and a thank you to all who have helped make them possible. And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.                                                                                                    

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The Overwhelming Ocean of Sound

When you can't discriminate background noise the world can be assaultive.

“Sound has a profound effect on the senses. It can be both heard and felt. It can even be seen with the mind’s eye. It can almost be tasted and smelled. Sound can evoke responses of the five senses. Sound can paint a picture, produce a mood, trigger the senses to remember another time and place. From infancy we hear sound with our entire bodies. Sound speaks to the sensorium; the entire system of…

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Update: The Battle for Special Education

It has been a while since since I have spoken about our on going battle to get Ben back to school. It has been nearly 8 weeks since he was in formal instruction. There were several weeks when things just locked down and nothing happened at all. It was a pervasive and deafening silence.

As I waited for news from the various boards and institutions about our shared fates, Ben has been coping with…

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Dark Passages and Secret Chambers

Communication and the prayer to connect and be complete as a person.

“Man has gone out to explore other worlds and other civilizations without having explored his own labyrinth of dark passages and secret chambers, and without finding what lies behind doorways that he himself has sealed.” ― Stanisław Lem

Recently, a friend and I spoke about writing as therapy. While I certainly have used writing as an outlet, I can’t say that I have ever allowed myself to do so in…

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The Struggle is Real

Hello. My Name is... Anxiety.

“You’re such a cute girl, you need to go out and meet new people. Just smile and the rest is easy. You will have fun once you are there. You will always be alone if you don’t put yourself out there. All that insecurity is just in your head. ” -Pretty Much Everyone 

Once I have put my foot in my mouth and agreed to engage in a social event, a few things instantly happen:

First, I begin to analyze…

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Sometimes There Is No Magic

When tried and true methods fail - a story of communication and cupcakes

When tried and true methods fail – a story of communication and cupcakes

We are home from holiday and content but tired. We will continue to have guests another day or two, which is lovely. My night was restless as my mind returned to local demands and troubles that waited unresolved for a fresh perspective. I wish I had found one. I march into a world of challenging communication. Communication…

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A World Away 

  “Why are we here,” Ben said, as I pulled the car up a twisted mountain road devoid of markers or pavement. 

“To be wild.” 

There are are no fluorescent lights here. No crowds. No buzzing of electric this’ and thats. There are no people saying ‘hold still,” “settle down,” “stopping jumping, spinning, chewing, flapping.” 

No one here cares if you look at your hands when you talk. Or around the…

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The Wedding - Almost

The Wedding – Almost

For Josh and Halyn – Your Wedding Toast and Why I didn’t make it today. Please know that I love you and I really, really tried! 

Today was the day.

Two very dear friends were finally going to say ‘I Do.’

I had spent the last week preparing a toast for the reception, making sure my yellow dress was pressed and preparing sandwiches for the reception. I knew that I would be working the night before…

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Not Feeling Accepted

9 year old Ben talks about his views of World Autism Day and what isn't right#ActuallyAutistic

Today, some kids have been treating me like garbage. I was having a normal morning playing rolblox and then (xxx) came to the door and wanted to know if I wanted to play with them. So I lollygagged around a bit because it’s Saturday but then I went out to play.

We have this wagon we are playing with but it was having some complications – like we were arguing about who got to sit in it and ride…

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Step Out of the Blue - and Into the Light

Love isn't determined by the person being loved - it's determined by the person giving it.

“Acceptance-Ultimately, you may feel a sense of acceptance. It’s helpful to distinguish between accepting that your child has been diagnosed with autism and accepting autism.”

-Autism Speaks

I wasn’t sure if I would write for World Autism Awareness Day. I suppose that sounds lazy or uncommitted, but with all the other battles raging in my world I just wasn’t sure that I would have the words.…

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What We Should Really Be Afraid Of

Vaccine refusal has real victims. They are just not the ones everyone is talking about.

Vaccine refusal has real victims. They are just not the ones everyone is talking about.  Little G. was a normal, sick child the day her mother walked her into the pediatrician’s office. She had been ill quite a bit recently, and this has her mother concerned. People keep telling her that frequent infections are common the first year a child is in school or daycare. Stuff goes around, exposure…

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The Necessity of Rebirth

Sharing a purposed moment of death and birth and new beginnings.

It’s hard to imagine how it became Easter so quickly. The first of the year and all of it’s well intentioned plans seem so far removed from the reality of today. Each day now seems almost a process of painting on the most anticipated face and hoping no one recognizes how awkward and out of place I feel.

I sweep up the extra Easter grass and hope that Ben forgives me for another Easter of not…

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Outraged and Exhausted - but Still Moving

Outraged and Exhausted – but Still Moving

This morning brought the news of another attack – my heart breaks for the people of Brussels. I am reminded of the recent attacks in Paris and the darkness that shrouds us all, as around the world tensions increase and fear becomes an extension of us all.

As I stand in my kitchen making eggs and jelly toast, Ben opens up about events at school – my child who takes rules literally asked another…

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Disordered Communication

Disordered Communication is still communication - It's harder but I am worth it

There are rare occasions when the words come easily. Rare. Certain conditions usually apply: familiar environment, familiar people, phone or other object of security close by, something available to occupy my hands and of course, my head has to be in the right place to begin with.

My more natural states of communication (to name a few) are :

Congested freeway – Every word is trying to get out at…

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The White Rose Society

The White Rose Society

Header image: Hans Scholl (2nd from left), Sophie Scholl, Willi Graf (mi) and Alexander Schmorell at Munich loading station 1942 .

In 1943, Nazi Propaganda Minster Joseph Goebbels called upon the German people to embrace “total war.” The tide had turned against the German forces and it’s Axis Allies.

At the same time several students raced through the halls of the University of Munich…