thirteen-anne-cameron-blog

[thirteen-anne-cameron-blog]

"I'm fine" A HouseCam oneshot

Greg House had noticed there was something wrong the second she had walked in that morning.

Her hair was tangled, her face was pale, she was jumpy and he couldn't confirm it but he thought he saw pain in her eyes.

Allison Cameron had had no sleep last night, one of the patients that they were treating had been diagnosed with Cancer, it was terminal, there was no cure. She sat awake all night crying not just because of the patient but also because of the pain in her thighs.

The blade dug into her thigh with a sharp pinch and glided against her skin smoothly leaving faint lines of blood in its tracks. Allison finished dragging the blade across her leg and cleaned it up with a wash cloth and bandaged it before lying in bed feeling numb.

House had noticed her change in demeanour the second she stepped through the door. The pain shot through her leg and stayed there. She flinched and sat down as House watched her in confusion. Surely his youngest and most caring duckling wasn't doing anything stupid. Or was she? He had no idea but he planned to work it out.

Allison went to the bathroom on the second floor of the hospital and closed the stall door, she slowly pulled down her trousers and examined the cut which seemed to have reopened. "Shit" she said as she cleaned the sore wound and put another bandaid on it. She had made the mistake of coming to work with no bandage on hoping it would be fine, clearly she was wrong.

House was worried about his duckling so he limped out of the room and towards the second floor toilets, he located the girls one and slowly eased open the door to hear faint crying. "Cameron?" There was no answer but the crying subsided. "Cam I know you're there I heard you sobbing" finally she answered and House let out a sigh of relief he didn't know he was holding in "I'm fine" was her reply and although House was glad she was talking, he was angry at her reply "Cameron come out" he demanded and she slowly came out of the door.

Allison slowly opened the door making sure her trousers were on properly and stepped out of the cubical. "Honestly I'm fine" she tried again. "No you're not! You don't sit in a cubical and cry if your fine" he said softer than what House normally spoke.

House was annoyed, how could she say she was fine when she clearly wasn't? "Come on" House told her and she followed him out of the room wearily. "What are you doing?" She asked as he started walking towards the elevator. "We, are going to Exam room 1 and you are going to show me" he replied as she reluctantly followed him to the elevator.

Allison Cameron was scared there was no denying that, she was terrified but again that was obvious, what shocked her most wasn't any of those, what shocked her was how happy she felt. On the inside she felt like slipping through a black hole and not returning and yet underneath that emotion she was happy that she was getting noticed, that she would be getting help, that terrified her, she dug deeper and realised she wasn't happy she was scared and broken and she was probably just a puzzle to House, but still she did what he said.

House led Cameron into exam room 2; exam room 1 was being used for a vaginal exam and he didn't feel like going in that one. "Sit on the metal table and show me" he said calmly. Cameron slowly went to the table, sat down and hesitantly pulled her trousers down to her knees.

House was shocked. There on the inside of the sweet innocent immunologists thigh was several cuts and two band aids. "Why" was the only thing House could say to her, he wanted to know what happened and why, he was going to start off calling her an idiot and explaining why he should fire her; but seeing the young and beautiful immunologist sitting on the metal table looking scared and lost he instantly felt bad. She wasn't an idiot, she was clearly as damaged as he was. The memories of that awful date came back to him and he felt awful about what he had said.

All Allison wanted was to know what he though about her, he gave her exactly that but he was cruel and he knew it "You live under the delusion that you can fix everything that isn't perfect. That's why you married a man who was dying of cancer. You don't love, you need. And now that your husband is dead, you're looking for your new charity case. That's why you're going out with me. I'm twice your age, I'm not great looking, I'm not charming, I'm not even nice. What I am is what you need... I'm damaged."

House flinched at what he had said that day, he had tried to turn her away. She had come into work that next week with red eyes and a temper... he was then brought back to the present by a knock on the door. He quickly limped over to it and locked it "who is it?" He yelled through the door making sure they couldn't get in "House, it's me why did you lock the door?" James Wilsons voice came through the door. "I'm doing an exam Jimmy come back later" he yelled glancing at Cameron out the corner of his eye. "Okay, I guess I'll see you later" James yelled back and walked off.

"House" Cameron whispered and House turned away from the door and came closer to her. "I'm fine" she whispered and House knew at that moment that she was damaged and scared. "I'm coming home with you" was all he said and she pulled her trousers back up. He followed her to her car that evening and got in the passenger seat. "You don't have to follow me you know" Cameron said and she started the car and drove to her apartment in silence.

Cameron pulled up to her apartment and silently got out, House followed her and didn't say a word as she opened her apartment door and walked in leaving it open for him. He went to her kitchen and made two mugs of coffee and brought them to the living area.

Cameron sat down nervously and smiled when House gave her a mug of coffee and sat on the other side of the couch. "Why?" He repeated and Cameron took a shaky breath. "I don't know" she replied and House sighed "there must be a reason" he said after a few minutes.

Cameron sat back with the still steaming coffee nestled in her hands. "You were right" she said and House raised an eyebrow confused. "When there was an epidemic on the baby ward...you were right" she repeated "I lost a baby."

At that moment House drew her closer and hugged her to him as she let out a shaky breath. "I'm sorry. Please stop doing this to yourself." was all he said.

Allison fell asleep on the couch shortly after, her legs were laying across the couch and her head was in House's lap.

House was playing with her hair and admiring her beauty, he lent down and kissed her forehead "I'm sorry...I do like you...I lied, everybody lies...I've always liked you but one day you'll find someone who cares about you more than I do and they will be able to give you a life...I love you Allison." House whispered and closes his eyes missing the smile that appeared on Cameron's face. "I love you too, I don't want anyone else...I will always want you. I don't need the life you think I want, I just want someone to love who loves me back, I love you so stay with me" she whispered back not realising House had heard it all.

They both fell asleep happy that night and they both knew it wouldn't be the last time they would fall asleep happy.