thingsicannotspeak

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I know I don't use tumblr anymore, but I remembered this blog exists and had a look back through my posts, it was nice and found a couple things I feel I needed to see. Not only to see how far I've come with dealing with my mental health issues, but also now I've come out as trans, seeing posts I made that stick out as some big flags for me.

May not post on here again, but, this serves as the first thing to be seen when looking at this blog.

So here, have a selfie I took, and here's to finally existing.

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Some times I sit down, and talk about serious shit. Then also this.

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I have never felt so tired and aroused at the same time, and holy SHIT THIS IS ANNOYING.

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My one weakness. Rum and coke in pint glasses.

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I feel proud of myself right now. For a long while, after I quit uni, and fell out of playing drums; I felt lost. Something I enjoyed doing, and wanted to do for a living, for a number of reasons fell through (and that’s a whole over post).

There was a backup plan, which fell through because just using computers a lot, won’t really work in terms of finding a job. Even if it did work, it was a crappy backup plan, because it would probably be as an IT support person who in my experience, get treated pretty poorly. Ain’t nobody got time for that.

Then just under 3 years ago I (just barely because of my age), I got onto an apprenticeship at an opticians. Always worn glasses so thought “Hey, why not?” That went on for a year, and whilst doing that found out about the learning progression that I could do through the store. All aimed at expanding my knowledge, and being able to do my job better (plus eventually more money, which is sweet, more money and more knowledge?!)

Slide forward through all the learning (optics, and quite a few other lessons learned), and here we are today. My application for a Dispensing Optician course has been accepted, and I’ve got an unconditional offer! 

I’ve found something that I enjoy, am excited about, and show enthusiasm for, that is work. At times, sure, it isn’t the greatest (although mostly down to some of the people I work with), but that’ll happen in pretty much all walks of life, not everyone will get along. 

Only other downside as well, is having to explain to everyone that no, I can’t do a sight test. It has the word optician in the name, yes, but the dispensing bit before it is the important bit. 

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I don't think I can understand how someone would want to go back into an abusive relationship. This person had been physically, and emotionally, scarred. Yet glorifies it, and actively seeks it out again, even after describing how terrible it was.

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Today at work, a lady asked me if my girlfriend went along with my Victorian style, what with the moustache and all.

I laughed at her really awkwardly.

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♥ be excellent to each other ♥

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Photographer Kevin Sawford has recently captured the hilarious reactions of a rabbit after eating a prickly thistle. It looked content at first, but that expression changed to disgust very soon. Take a look.

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(Source: /u/mistafrieds)

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Starting the process of pulling myself back together, and putting my shit in a box. Not actual shit, but, you get what I'm saying.

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Fun fact: Captain James T Kirk sometimes forgot that Captain’s Log isn’t his personal diary and that made many people from the Starfleet Command very confused

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Sometimest just want to be a massive cunt and have people hate me.

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Holy shit.

I don’t understand people.

Ain’t got shit now.

Back to square one.