things-ive-learned-from-wtnv

[things-ive-learned-from-wtnv]

bananas are hardly that slippery - preintro quip, ep 15

to which i say BET, i was at a group event where we did "real life mario kart" where people ran around dragging other people on those lil carts that elementary schoolers use in gym class (maybe thats just me,,,), and there were balloons and people chucked things iNCLUDING BANANA PEELS and damn if those were slippery

(a seperate anecdote is that my younger sibling and i were doing something to help clean up the mario kart, and they accidentally punched my face and my lip started bleeding, and they couldnt look at my face for literal HOURS without getting nauseous from the guilt or smth)

[things-ive-learned-from-wtnv]

angels have to use telephones

(ep 14)

[things-ive-learned-from-wtnv]

nothing should ever leave parks, be they dog parks or grove park

[things-ive-learned-from-wtnv]

l i t e r a l l y

listening to wtnv in 2024 makes me understand immediately why tumblr over a decade ago thought this shit was the coolest thing ever. it casually but flawlessly parodies the us surveillance state, ultra-militarized police forces, inane human resource bureaucracies and the blasé of the suburban middle class all within the span of three episodes with a very tongue in cheek slice of life format that doesn’t sound possible on paper but is executed absolutely absurdly well

[things-ive-learned-from-wtnv]

people are more likely to buy stuff if its available and for sale.

research said so.

[things-ive-learned-from-wtnv]

wanna be a good writer?? well, remember occams razor?

NEVER follow occams razor.

follow anything BUT occams razor.

[things-ive-learned-from-wtnv]

plastic bags are capable of vandalism and assault, if theyre from a dog park.

[things-ive-learned-from-wtnv]

pyramids are hard to arrest

[things-ive-learned-from-wtnv]

NEVER intern at local community radio stations. all you'll get is a shoutout.

[things-ive-learned-from-wtnv]

for ye old 18+ americans:

vote correctly :))) or never see ur loved ones again :)))

[things-ive-learned-from-wtnv]

okay i'm hella late to the game considering i literally got tumblr yesterday but it took me roughly,, 5? seconds to find out cecil gershwin palmer won the tumblr sexyman contest, and i can't get over all the "who is cecil" like bitch nice try i don't know who reigen or whatever is.

if there is a tumblr sexyman poll 2024 i know who i'm voting for.

(please give me back my family from the abandoned mineshaft, can this be enough?? please???)

[things-ive-learned-from-wtnv]

sticking your head??? in random space time rifts??? can have pretty bad consequences.

who knew.

[things-ive-learned-from-wtnv]

are we safe from dinosaurs? no. (ep 4)

[things-ive-learned-from-wtnv]

no one makes a slice like big rico.

no one

[things-ive-learned-from-wtnv]

i am a peach. literally. (postcredits, ep 5)

[things-ive-learned-from-wtnv]

there are 3 genders. ladies. gentlemen. listeners.

(ep 5)