thexgrayxlady

[thexgrayxlady]

The funniest one star review of Wicked I've seen so far

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In which Joker and the crew have a movie night.

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pinball wizard the arcane arcade trickster who makes a living by cheating at arcade games and reselling minion plushies to children

comms open!

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Actually that no punctuation plot hole ooc wattpad fanfic written by that 12 year old will ALWAYS be better than character ai. And I love that 12 year old btw

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This is the funniest shit I’ve read all day

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First off, click here.

The wheel just assigned you one of the Worldwide Box Office Winners from the past 35 years. (No 2024 because we don't know that winner, yet.)

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In which Joker and the crew have a movie night.

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Joker literally all day: Mira Shepard is a bossy emotionless robot.

Joker the second someone else calls her a bossy emotionless robot: Commander Shepard is a hard working, intelligent person who is not even kind of paid enough for this shit. But she’s doing it anyway. Show some damn respect.

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In which Joker and the crew have a movie night.

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I'm crying, @massachusetts-official have you seen this??

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Chase Young in this fic: I will not let this damn hag ruin my victory! Also Chase in this fic: Evil witch hot.

[thexgrayxlady]

ok i’m a Jew but let me tell you something

this:

is vastly vastly inferior to this:

[thexgrayxlady]

It really bothers me when I see MRAs harping on family court favoring women after divorce. Mothers getting custody of their children is actually a rather new concept and for much of history children were seen as the property of their father and fathers were usually granted custody automatically. This precedent existed into the 1970s. And still the court is biased in favor of men, men win 93% of custody cases they participate in, women are twice as likely to lose custody if they report abuse perpetrated by the father. Courts are still biased towards fathers and it is detrimental, the reason you see more custodial mothers is because men willingly give up custody. If they fought, chances are they’d win, even if it was against the child’s best interest.

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dropping this here

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PROMPTS FOR CARRYING/BEING CARRIED *  assorted dialogue, adjust as necessary

all right! up you get!

i'm going to carry you, of course.

stop squirming! i'm losing my grip on you!

you're safe in my arms.

can you walk on it?

maybe i need to carry you there.

i don't want to be carried.

no! i can walk just fine by myself!

you're a lot lighter than i expected.

falling asleep in my arms, are we?

how long was i out?

have you been carrying me this whole time?

i don't remember being picked up.

this was your master plan all along, wasn't it.

have i been sleeping this whole time?

no! put me down!

can you at least be a bit more gentle when you lift me?

i could get used to this.

if you need a break, you can set me down.

you pretended to twist your ankle just so i would carry you.

i didn't ask you to carry me.

you're quite handsome at this angle.

if i'm not careful, you'll ask to be carried everywhere.

are you comfortable like this? i can switch arms.

could you put me down?

ow! that hurts when you move like that!

you can put me down right here.

just lay me down over there.

please don't tell anybody you did this.

if they find out i let someone carry me, i'm dead.

well, this is a bit awkward.

you're very warm, you know.

you smell nice.

you can go to sleep if you'd like. it's okay.

let me get you somewhere safe.

oh no. i'm not climbing on your back.

just stay quiet. i've got you.

you look rather beautiful all curled up in my arms.

i don't think i can walk that far.

we will never speak of this arrangement again.

just tell them i hurt my leg.

stop smiling down at me!

apparently my shoulder makes for a good pillow.

would you do me a favor and pick me up?

i'm not sure i can walk all the way.

i appreciate you helping me out in this way.

stop smirking at me. i see you.

no, i don't like this! i'm humiliated!

i won't let anything happen to you here.

do you do this often? twist your ankle just to make someone else carry you?

how about a piggyback ride?

[thexgrayxlady]

This year, I've mostly priced myself out of braiding over the winter, and I dont really feel bad about it.