theworldwidewebers-blog

[theworldwidewebers-blog]

“I barely even noticed a baby was there” was just one of the lovely lines we used to hear from people sitting around us when Nala was flying at the ripe age of 0-15 months old. Now she’s 2.5 and running through the aisles like we let her snort pixie sticks before boarding. Then you have the newest recruit who we figured would follow in his sisters well traveled footprints. And yet oh how wrong we were. Exhibit B clearly shows that we’ve been exiled to the back to the plane where his 7 month old teradactyle screeches and general fussiness about being held this many hours will break the least amount of ear drums possible. Not shown: us in the corner, eating our humble pie after realizing that after all this travel, our kids are not angelic humans who performed a 12hr travel day today without making a peep. Well ya win some ya lose some #theydowhattheywant #zerofucksgiven #couldvebeenworse #definitelycouldvebeenbetter #willparentforpie

[theworldwidewebers-blog]

Based on his hand position I’d say he’s dreaming of milking a lactating being. Whether that’s a cow or me is yet to be determined. And based on the size of his cheeks he’s clearly been successful #milkman #futurefarmer #or400lbman #tooearlytotell

[theworldwidewebers-blog]

And now I give you the 5 stages of a dance party. Illustrated masterfully by the twerking toddler #shakeyaass #watchyaself #bewareofpinochio (at London, United Kingdom)

[theworldwidewebers-blog]

👉NEW PRODUCT REVIEW👈 Is the @mima_kids Zigi the worlds most luxurious travel stroller? After testing it out on planes, trains, and automobiles we’ve got the good, bad, and cost for this beautiful buggy @theworldwidewebers blog (link in profile). Find out why choosing the right stroller is basically just parental tinder and how you can mate for life the first time around #swiperight #prettyprams #mimazigi #cheekyrascals #sponsored #butalwayshonest

[theworldwidewebers-blog]

We may have major FOMO this weekend as we stay in London instead of traveling over Easter break but at least our bellies and wallets will be fat and happy. Kids Eat Free this weekend at Giraffe World Kitchen @giraffesnaps all over London! So join us in our plan to literally stuff our faces and end up in a family sofa snooze. Because after traveling, passing out from over feeding is my second loved hobby #maybefirstlove #callitatie #familyfriendlylondon #girafferestaurants #ad (at Giraffe World Kitchen)

[theworldwidewebers-blog]

Why walk anywhere when you could be carried everywhere? The toddler may be crazy but she’s certainly not dumb! #cleopatracomplex #topofthetotempoletoddler #smarterthanshelooks #dirtierthanshesmells (at Brixton, South London)

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Colombia you’ve been grand but it’s time to go! Now to determine whether the brown stuff on the kids is poop, chocolate, or coffee. A game fondly referred to as the Colombian Conundrum #probablyamix #kingofwishfulthinking #someonesattractingflies #fml (at Quindio, Colombia)

[theworldwidewebers-blog]

How much Spanish do I need to learn to be able to call this Colombian hacienda mi casa? I know how to ask for a beer and a bathroom which in my book is pretty much fluent. My 6 months living in Spain and two rounds of Spanish 101 have clearly paid off don’t ya think? #dondeelbano #livinlavidaloca #hastalavistababay #fluentaf (at Hacienda Bambusa)

[theworldwidewebers-blog]

👉NEW BLOG👈 What does a family that’s travel obsessed do when they’re at home? We eat our feelings, obviously. Find out how we feed our global wanderlust while staying local in the U.K. We’ve partnered with Giraffe World Kitchen @giraffesnaps to show off their Kids Eat Free Over Easter deal. Because the only thing better than a meal your kids will actually eat is one you don’t have to pay for #winnerwinner #giraffedinner #giraffesnaps #sponsored #andwellfed (at Giraffe southbank)

[theworldwidewebers-blog]

Stinkin cute...key word stinkin. If there’s one unanimous opinion in our household lately, it’s that the toddler isn’t ready for potty training. Daily conversations include asking her if she wants to go, to which she politely responds “no”, to the nursery school who says she has zero interest. Sooo I guess we’ll just wait until she gives us the old baseball signals telling us she’s ready. If you need us we’ll be in the diaper aisle buying size 14 diapers. Tell me there’s hope and she won’t go to high school in a diaper please #got99problemsandthepottysone #diaperdutyforever #renandstinky (at Colombia)

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Him: wasn’t that funny Me: hilarious Disclaimer: I still have no idea what the joke was but I know better than to question a man holding a sleeping child on a very hot Colombian day. #marriagerules #alwayslaughatjokes #evenbadones #oknotreallybadones #theyhavetolearnsomehow (at Colombia)

[theworldwidewebers-blog]

Out of all the weird things about our household, the fact that we don’t drink coffee remains to be the number one voted weird fact about us. I’ve come to realize this makes us aliens amongst the parenting community and deemed forever suspicious by most. But trust me, if you met either me or my husband in person you wouldn’t give us caffeine either! #thirstythursday #wheninrome #drinkasthecolombiansdo #brighteyedandbushytailedbabyahead (at Colombia)

[theworldwidewebers-blog]

Happy anniversary-eve to this guy. In the 4 years we’ve been married we’ve added 4 mammals to feed and shacked up in 4 countries. So instead of flowers and fruit as the traditional 4th year gift, I think maybe we should just aim for birth control and dog walkers? You’re crazy, but you’re my crazy and you make hauling children around look sexy, so that’s a significant bonus. Here’s to marrying guys we meet while drunk at bars and then procreating under similar circumstances. *Important note: this is being posted one day before the actual anniversary, not because I’m so nuts about the blessed event, but more to win the game of wishing him a happy anniversary first. Because the game is called I win.* #sundayfundayforever #happyanniversary #iwin #flowersandchocolatestillwelcome (at Colombia)

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Happy U. K. Mother’s Day! Go on and celebrate with your bad self, and ideally only yourself. Because motherhood is made up of sweet moments that look like this, and many many more that don’t. Never feel down from seeing picture perfect social media moms that appear to have their hair, makeup and motherhood routines down to a science. Because in reality, those perfect pictures are usually taken from far away and just before it becomes clear that a sibling-hug is actually a strangle. #totalmonet #siblingstrangles #brothersgottahug #theybothcriedafterwards #happymothersday (at Colombia)

[theworldwidewebers-blog]

Healthy greenery and a clean white house. Two things we have to travel to see as they’re impossible to accomplish on our home turf. It is truly shocking that I can keep 2 kids, 2 dogs, and 1 husband alive yet even a succulent dies in 3 days or less in the house. One day I’ll graduate from humans to plants, in the meantime it’s probably best that my current mammals cry if I forget to feed them #becauseiforgetsometimes #dontjudgeme #survivaloftheloudest (at Colombia)

[theworldwidewebers-blog]

Happy International Women’s Day! This is for all the women who have already, are currently, and will do amazing things. From picking the perfect booger to picking the perfect cause to stand behind, it all counts as a step in the right direction. Now if only I could convince the toddler how much easier it would be to achieve things if she used her hands for something other than picking her nose, we might make faster progress #littlewomen #arejustnastytoddlers #whoturnintorebelgirls #whostillpicktheirnose #andruntheworld (at Colombia)

[theworldwidewebers-blog]

⭐️NEW BLOG⭐️ THE MAGIC OF THE BABY SLEEP TRAINER METHOD @theworldwidewebers Blog (link in profile). Warning: Reading this article may result in increased parental sanity. This picture was clearly taken before the baby was giving us some rest, when we were seeking revenge through some pretty pretty princess bows #becausesleepislife #sweetrevenge #nosleepforthewicked #babysleeptrainer #bstjourney