therealcaptainwoodward

[therealcaptainwoodward]

crimplushie srcibbled with boardpen on yo face

*still unconscious*

[therealcaptainwoodward]

Foolish Captain, I laced yo shit!

Wha- *falls over unconscious*

[therealcaptainwoodward]

how do you feel about captain matias torres

... band dog puts it best ironically enough, send him to solitary.

[therealcaptainwoodward]

Get it done then. Make sure the crew is stocked up on water bottles.

Hear what? Maybe that Crimson plushie is back.

@therealcaptainwoodward CAPTAIN THE REC ROOM FLOODED, A PIPE BURST!

Well, i guess the swimming pool is bigger now?

[therealcaptainwoodward]

*He rubbed his head with a groan* begin drainage of the flooding and replace the pool water along with a revamp of all our pipes.

Hear what? Maybe that Crimson plushie is back.

@therealcaptainwoodward CAPTAIN THE REC ROOM FLOODED, A PIPE BURST!

Well, i guess the swimming pool is bigger now?

[therealcaptainwoodward]

Dead name my ship again and I'll turn you into a fridge.

please let me die

Request Denied Note From Lead Programmer Nikolai : "Crimson One, how the fuck are you communicating with us? I heard you were killed over Presidia?"

[therealcaptainwoodward]

Have you tried a hammer?

please let me die

Request Denied Note From Lead Programmer Nikolai : "Crimson One, how the fuck are you communicating with us? I heard you were killed over Presidia?"

[therealcaptainwoodward]

Already got his radio call, we will get him you RTB, we'll also look out for that plushie.

After being thrown away, Crimplushie sneaked onto your beloved MG and stirred you up mid-mission.

"Prepare for what's coming!"

The Evil Plushie jumping around the cockpit

*The plushie ended up putting the MG-29 into a unrecoverable flat spin*

WHAT- WHAT THE FUCK HAVE YOU DONE? SHIT- CMON! CMON! *He was desperately trying to bring it out of the flat spin, warnings going off about stall speed, altitude, as well as engine failures from fuel starvation and "Don't sink!" as he approached the ocean below. Forced with no other options he reported on an open comms net*

MAYDAY MAYDAY, THIS IS HITMAN-2, CATASTROPHIC FAILURE WITH RAPID DECENT, EJECTING OVER THE BISMARCK SEA AND CALLING FOR RESCUE.

*He then pulled the ejection handle, the canopy broke off the aircraft allowing his seat to fire up into the sky and give ample time for his parachute to open, and watch his MG-29 tumble to the ocean and crash with a spectacular splash*

[therealcaptainwoodward]

Yo, Captain, what’s the highest caliber cannon on the ED and hie many of them do we have?

18 inch 4 barrels on each turret so 16 I think

(Ooc: These are educated guesses I'm not sure)

[therealcaptainwoodward]

<<Woodward, do you ever have to deal with your crew calling you old? Sicario has had… issues.>>

- @notarnoldfrenken

Buddy- I'm in my late 30'a I just accept it even though I'm not and it's rare that someone calls me old

[therealcaptainwoodward]

oh yeah i forgot your dingly ass shit i mean ship cant even carry aircraft 😂😂😂😂😂

We have AA guns and anti air missiles, we'll be fine.

[therealcaptainwoodward]

Captain, do you think we could get a runway for the ship?

As much as of a good idea that sounds I doubt we have the space or spare tonnage.

[therealcaptainwoodward]

"OVER GLORIFIED METAL TUBE"?????????? MOTHERFUCKER I WILL FIND YOU AND FRY YOU ALIVE ON A RAILGUN

@eminent-domain-first-mate @eminent-domain-crewblog y'all hear something?

[therealcaptainwoodward]

the alicorn would sink your stupid eminent domain like its a paper boat out in a storm btw

If the Federation Navy couldn't sink us I doubt that over glorified metal tube will

[therealcaptainwoodward]

Captain, suggestion. We could install a new fog horn on the Eminent Domain. A bit of psychological warfare before naval warfare to scare Fed sailors shitless. Here is a possible option we have.

https://youtu.be/4avvO-vJuN0?si=3DCBgpCV9bOGkjan

Excellent idea, we'll install 4 for surround sound.

[therealcaptainwoodward]

Cry?

[ can you mark the ED as a hostile? This thread they've got is too long. It's clogging my TUMBLR FEED!! ]

( @therealhitman1 )

No =)

[therealcaptainwoodward]

is it true that fish

What?