themonochromesystem

[themonochromesystem]

In-system relationships can be so intimate.

Waking up together, opening the same eyes, and stretching the same limbs. Yawning in time and saying a good morning that only you who are involved can understand what it's for.

Sharing a meal, not only from the same plate, but with the same hands and the same senses. Deciding what to eat together, something that fits all of your tastes.

Curled in the same bed, in the same blankets, in the same body, drowzily mumbling about nothing and everything to each other. Joking around and feeling their sleepy laugh as if it were your own.

Living life, and inviting them to share yours and your time in it--performing your daily tasks in the unison of cofront. Seeing and hearing and feeling everything together.

Feeling them blush when you flirt or compliment them. Feeling their joy when you get them a gift, or how safe you make them feel simply when you're around them.

Enveloped in the same love, from the same brain, with the same feeling of care for each other palpable between you. Feeling the emotions you feel yourself, coming from the other person. Feeling their love for you, in the rawest, most direct possible way.

[themonochromesystem]

Back in childhood I was wishing I was home “Home” like my favorite cartoon “Home” like my headspace “Home” like a wish to wake up the next morning ok Not this ugly trauma Not this awful abuse But that was memories Now I have a home A home that doesn’t hold a candle to the beginning A home that makes the next morning come Like how much I wanted back in early childhood And I trust, I understand, I experience so much I will be silly and genuine because it’s not bad Is it glamorizing my DID To be genuinely content? I don’t think so

[themonochromesystem]

i am left on the side of the road like road kill. waiting for the vultures to eat at my rotten flesh.

[themonochromesystem]

“Don’t let your disorder define you”

Okay but do you support the people whose disorders do define them?

Do you support people with the chronic illnesses who have had to develop whole lives around their conditions? Do you support the intellectually disabled people whose whole way of thinking is defined by their disorder? Do you support the people with personality disorders who literally have a disorder as a personality? Do you support the autism/ADHD people whose disorder you can’t separate from who they are? Do you support the DIDOSDD people who have multiple definitions of themselves because of their disorder?

Or are you just saying that because a disorder defining someone means you can’t ignore it.

[themonochromesystem]

Just to be clear, if your idea of an ideal future at any point involves killing disabled people or allowing disabled people to die- you're not a punk, you're a fascist. Hope that helps

[themonochromesystem]

the world wants me dead so I live. the world wants me miserable so I find joy where I can.

[themonochromesystem]

addicts are included in neurodivergent and disabled pride. our experiences matter. we matter. our voices deserve to be heard, and our lives deserve to be celebrated. that is the crux of pride - it's not about encouraging harmful behavior, it's about encouraging disenfranchised, marginalized people to love themselves no matter their story. and that has to include addicts.

[themonochromesystem]

The narrative that “you should care about disabled people because one day that’ll be you” is ableist in and of itself.

You should care about disabled people’s rights because you should care about the disenfranchisement of a marginalized community.

Becoming disabled is not a punishment. Becoming disabled is not a threat. Becoming disabled is not cosmic retaliation for being ableist. Becoming disabled is morally neutral.

[themonochromesystem]

I’m allowed to be lazy. Disabled or not. Laziness isn’t an inherently bad thing y’all just too caught up in hyper capitalist hustle culture to care. I don’t owe you productivity. I’m allowed to rest.

My rest is radical.

[themonochromesystem]

Disability justice includes those who are disabled due to their own actions. You are not here to be blamed for what happened or why it did, you are here to receive love and support on your own journey.

[themonochromesystem]

Aside from my seething and raging I will say that I fucking love narcissists. You do not deserve the way the world treats you. You do not deserve being looked down on and shat on and dehumanized and threatened merely for having a traumatic condition beyond your control. You are good and there are people who love you. And I know it hurts sometimes, but that is okay. It’s not your fault. You are not a monster. You are not an abuser. You are not evil or cruel nor are you some unstable unhinged child or whatever other ugly things others or your own brain wants to tell you. I love you, you deserve safety, and there’s always gonna be people in your corner fighting for and fighting alongside you.

[themonochromesystem]

Fun fact: People with high amounts of empathy can abuse people with low/no empathy! Having empathy (even very high amounts of it) does not make it so someone can't be abusive. Having low/no empathy does not make it so you can't be abused.

[themonochromesystem]

[themonochromesystem]

computers, spirals, general tech.

☆ ☆ ☆ / ☆ ☆ ☆ / ☆ ☆ ☆

[themonochromesystem]

it’s okay to do things that make your symptoms worse (as long as you’ll stay safe)

every once in a while you need to eat something yummy. or go on a walk. or a trip to the zoo. take a hot shower. cry your eyes out. dance. listen to music. draw for way to long. write. laugh. sit in a cafe with a friend. paint your nails. dye your hair. go on a run. pet a cat

sometimes you need to do things that are cathartic or make yourself feel alive. sometimes you need the reminder of why you’re fighting so hard to stay alive

this is your reminder that just because it makes your symptoms worse, it isn’t always the wrong thing to do. there can be value in these actions

[themonochromesystem]

nanami kento is one of the hottest anime men of all time for SURE but it does make me laugh when people are like “whew love an older man omg daddy” because he’s 27 in JJK 0, 28 in the rest of the story. he had his quarter life crisis and went back to jujutsu after his prefrontal cortex finally snapped into place. he looks a little older and tired bc him and ijichi are supposed to be a commentary on how being a salaryman ages you but like. he’s a 28 year old man. he’s not daddy he’s just a Guy (a very nice and hot one) but like. a Guy.

same thing with Gojo. he’s 28 in JJK 0 and 29 in the rest of the story. he’s not even 30 please that’s not “daddy” that’s my twunk best friend who spends too much time at the gym and hasn’t unpacked his childhood trauma. “dad gojo” my brother in christ when he was taking care of megumi and tsumiki as kids he was a depressed gay guy in his late teens-early 20s who had just recently been politically radicalized. have you met a 20 year old guy in college. he is megumi’s annoying gay brother who doesn’t know what the fuck he’s doing.

[themonochromesystem]

Percy Jackson was a great character because he was just So Angry. Literally the only time an author has accurately portrayed the bloodlust of being a twelve year old with adhd.