thelasthumanalive

[thelasthumanalive]

I havent weighed myself in over a week because i was too scared since i've been eating more lately. But i will do it today, i just hope its not that bad.

[thelasthumanalive]

Ana will be the only one, that will stick around until the very end. Only she can truly love me. Only she knows and accepts the real me.

[thelasthumanalive]

Yeah, having a crush is fun and all until the jelousy kicks in

[thelasthumanalive]

"Yeah, im good!" - i live in constant fear of abandonment, every important person eventually leaves me, no one will ever love me because i cant even love myself, i hate being around people but i am so lonely, i just need attention and someone to be there for me. Every night i think of how many things im missing out on and how happy i could be if only i were different. If only i would be enough. Every day i try to prove to myself that i am enough and when i fail i hate myself even more.. but its okay, im used to it by now.

[thelasthumanalive]

During my "recovery" last year i gained the most weight around and after holidays. Hoping this year will be different.

*NOT my photo*

~☆♡~Manifesting their dream bodies for everyone ~☆♡~

[thelasthumanalive]

my inability to talk to people is ruining my life

[thelasthumanalive]

I hate these types of ppl sm

[thelasthumanalive]

[thelasthumanalive]

[thelasthumanalive]

I am so sick of seeing my classmates/friends doing the exact same shit i used to do. Like skipping lunch at school on purpose, replacing food with zero cal drinks, gum. I know i did (and still do) the same a year ago, but at least i hide it and dont talk about it like its an accomplishment. It is not an aesthetic. Its not cute.

I just cant stand it.

[thelasthumanalive]

Sh bingo

[thelasthumanalive]

[thelasthumanalive]

Getting your period is the most invalidating thing. I would rather bleed from other places.

[thelasthumanalive]

All of my friends annoy me.

No matter how long we've been friends or how serious our friendship was, at some point, every single person annoys me so god damn much. To the point i cant stand being in the same room as them. I know its my problem, but i cant do anything about it. Thats why i dont have lasting, deep connections with people. That really scares me sometimes..

[thelasthumanalive]

TW:SH

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So basically...i got a new box cutter and wanted to try it out (on my skin).

I have been mainly using box cutters for sh-ing for a pretty long time now so im used to their sharpness. But my god was this one so sharp (compared to the ones i normally use). I wanted a shallow styro, like i usually do, but instead acidentally made one of the deepest styros i have ever seen.

Plus i was 1 month clean..

[thelasthumanalive]

hey (with the intention to kiss you in between grocery aisles)

[thelasthumanalive]

SEPTEMBER UPDATE♡:

Fasting/restricting is so much easier with school + art school. Im trying to start off pretty slow and then move to lower restriction. Havent binged yet.

(I dont know if i should put my cw, gw in these :/ )