thehumanplauge

[thehumanplauge]

Deafen Me With Your Silence

There is a sound no one can hear

But if you hear, it'll be loud and clear

Expectations don't come for free

Disappointment sucks when you are me

I hear it everywhere I go

My ears prick up and then I know

Silence is it's own reward

But way too loud when I'm ignored

Rest assured I'm not deceased

There would have been a press release

My own funeral I'd attend

My own eulogy I'd have penned

Saying, “I'm not dead, just overlooked”

My social life is undercooked

I'll call you...you won't call me

Check my diary if you're free

I don't know why I'm on the nose

Anyone willing to disclose?

Silence is the loudest sound

Celibate rifles on the battleground

Should I pretend I don't care?

Act as if I'm unaware?

Pretending and acting aren't my thing

Confrontation in full swing

Bring it all to a head

I may smell bad...but I ain't dead

Whispers quietly deafen me

I'm no longer your cup of tea

Would be sad...got mad instead

I think about it and I see red

All of you can go and jump

I'm lovelorn, but not a chump

What could I gain...what is my hope

Of putting you under the microscope

That quiet shrug...an act so smug

Sweep me under your proverbial rug

There I'll gather like a lump

Slow down for the speed bump

Deal with me or walk away

Don't keep me near for a rainy day

It's sad to think I've become a chore

Looking back on how we were before

For my part I apologize

In bringing about our demise

I wish you all the very best

For the time we had, I feel blessed

I never meant to cause you pain

One more link in the daisy chain

[thehumanplauge]

Redemption’s Lost Cause

Without the warmth of a woman's love

A man's soul grows cold

He aches and ponders past times and regrets

When he held a heart of beauty unbound

And destroyed that which he did not know he had

Until winter's nights reminded him of her touch

And he ate alone in quiet reflection

Remembering when laughter filled the air

And her voice calling out his name

Replaced now by silence

Ghosts would come in the dead of night

Memories of good times past

They to have now forsaken him

The sentence given which bears justice will stand

And lessons hard-learned will remain

He screams into night's darkest void

“God have mercy on my wretched soul!!”

But his prays will go unanswered

And dreams of holding such beauty again

Carry him without promise

Redemption's lost soul searches for a smile

Hopes and dreams to be someone...

Who someone cares about

End with the light at the end of each day

And begins again when morning’s light shines

[thehumanplauge]

The Invisible Man (Introduction)

The early nineties in Brisbane, Australia, were not unlike many other cities around the world at that time. The dance scene was kicking off, and the drugs followed like a flood to a parched field.

We had suffered under a type of dictatorship, as the Premier of Queensland, Sir Joh Bjelke Petersen had drawn lines around our state, creating a gerrymander that saw him cling to power for seventeen years, despite the majority of people voting against him.

Bands like The Saints (with their track 'Stranded'), and later Razar (Task Force...Undercover Cop), were considered by Joh to be an affront to society, to be stamped out at any cost. And Joh's Task Force...his personal army, made up of the biggest and hardest cops, made sure anyone who attended such events would learn how jackboots and truncheon could descend upon the innocent.                                                                        

In the years that followed, the bands and punters became less fearful. Joh had other problems to deal with (charged with perjury over evidence he gave to the Fitzgerald inquiry).  

Sydney was no longer the place for up and comers to relocate, for a chance to make their art into a living. Clubs would open and then close down, as the youth who patronised these places saw new and more exciting venues on the flyers that adorned the street corner light poles and billboards around the city.                                             

As is the way with youth, change was on the horizon when, in the early nineties, I attended my first dance party. For me, dance and disco had always been my guilty pleasure. Songs like 'Dancing Queen' (ABBA) and 'I Feel Love' (Donna Summer), or anything that had a repetitive beat, were shunned by my rock and alternative friends.

So, with a backpack over my shoulder and a head full of speed, I approached the sound of my future...doof doof doof, and I was still hundreds of meters away. Louder and louder until I stood outside 'The Arena' in Brisbane's Fortitude Valley. There I felt an energy I never had at any of the rock concerts I had always known.

Hundreds were milling outside the entrance (the baggy pants, bright fluro and pastels...I must have stuck out like a sore thumb). I thought it would take me forever to get inside, but most were not waiting to get in, they were getting some air or cooling down, smoking cigarettes and waiting for friends or dealers to show up.  

I made my way to the entrance, paid the pretty girl who looked like a happy monster fairy the twenty-five dollar cover charge, and with no idea what awaited me behind those doors walked through...and was instantly transported to another universe.                                                                                                              

I had never heard music so loud, or seen more smiling faces. The clubs where the black T's and sad faces had been all I knew, were now a thing of my past, as I watched two mini-skirted young girls dancing on a tabletop, smiling at my open jaw.  

"Why were they not seeing right through me?", I thought, as had happened so often in my previous life. Looking behind me to see who they were smiling at, and then back...they would have guessed that I wasn't from around those parts. But their smiles were the warm welcome I had been waiting for my entire adult life.

There was no click in the room that night, just a couple of thousand ravers, off their heads on MDMA or other similar intoxicants. Dancing and smiling, leaving behind the problems of the world just outside...yet a universe away. And as I made my way to the dance floor, I had not an inkling of what the next ten years were to bring.

[thehumanplauge]

The Darkness Comes

Sadness envelopes me

It permeates into every corner of my being

Dark and sticky and binding

Molasses of the soul

I drown in the overwhelming reality

One by one they leave

Dying my own slow death

If I don't care...should you?

Once upon a time a fairy tale lived

Long ago in a far away land

Cursed be forever more

The end...I wish

Wish wish upon a star

Who's light shines bright in the night sky

Yet all who see it for what it is

It's death came a million years before

Time itself is a liar

Depending on where you stand

Muzzle flash of ending pain

But light years away from  a cure

[thehumanplauge]

The Nice Young Raver Gets Shafted

Once upon a time in a little place called Fortitude Valley, a nice young raver was going about his business in a haze of X and happiness, when he was accosted by two beautiful women.

They did not speak English well, but by their mini skirts and sparkles, he assumed that they were looking for a good time. He gestured for them to follow, as he was sure that the club he was headed for was the one that they were to have a dance to start the night off.

As they arrived, the doorman was kind and gentle and said that they could enter.

The nice young raver was feeling rather chipper at his entrance to the club. It was very unusual for him to be with such lovely young foreigners, who dressed like European hookers. As he was meeting his friends there to plan out their night of drug-taking and the like, his mood became even more chipper because his friends all came over to say hello, and he felt, at last, he was getting the respect that he deserved.

The DJ that night was cranking out some loopy hard house tunes, and the friends, with their new acquaintances, were having a really fat time.

”FULLY SICK!!!” was one comment that caused the crowd to lift and scream.

Soon, the nice young raver was starting to feel a little tired and needed to go to the bathroom to substance abuse his little brains out.

He was followed by the lovely young foreigners, as they too were suffering from lack of effect from the substances they had consumed earlier.

”Oh no, you can’t come in here…the kind and gentle doorman will see and evict us from this banging club.”

The lovely young foreigners looked downcast. The nice young raver felt glum that he could not share some of the substances that he had secreted upon his person…then he came up with an excellent plan.

As the lovely young foreigners could not speak the local lingo, he used his very best hand signals and mouthed in a foreign accent, that they could take his small bag of substances and use some for themselves. Huge smiles became the answer to his suggestion, and they quickly disappeared into the lady’s restroom.

Happy as can be to offer these lovely young foreigners some of his substances, he waited outside for their hasty return…but some time lapsed, and the nice young raver began to worry.

Then they appeared, looking as sprightly as ever, and the nice young raver was sure that at nights end, one of these lovely young foreigners was to accompany him home for a day of shenanigans at his humble abode.

All he had to do now was recover from the lovely young foreigners his substances, that were surely left over for his own tiredness to be rectified…but it seemed there was some sort of misunderstanding…the lovely young foreigners looked blankly at the nice young raver when he tried to convey to them that he too was feeling a little tired, and needed some of the substances that were surely left over for him.

But alas, it was not to be. The lovely young foreigners had misunderstood what the nice young raver had said, and used the entire bag of substances, leaving nothing for the nice young raver to use for himself.

Oh well, at least he was still to have his way with one of the lovely young foreigners in the day ahead. He turned to find the lovely young foreigners and was very surprised to see they had already left the banging club, disappearing into the smog of a lovely pre-dawn morn, in the beautiful Fortitude Valley.  

[thehumanplauge]

The Funny Guy

 I look back and see 

Roads traveled...choices made 

Hindsight is 20/20 

The game of life is never perfectly played 

Regrets there are a plenty 

In any a man's life 

Lessons were meant to teach me 

Preventing further strife 

Not being the fast learner 

Thinking It was smart to be the class fool 

Back when consequences were so easy 

And punishments were not so cruel 

Along with adulthood came responsibilities 

No longer the funny kid, the likable clown 

Then the kids stopped their laughing 

And the mood of life went down 

To find myself in this position 

Battling demons at such an age 

This is not my idea of fun 

Not the limelight's or the stage 

The demon that now rides me 

The monkey on my back 

Has no patience for my humor 

The color of his comedy is black 

If only I had seen it 

Through my belly laughing eyes 

Now nothing seems so funny 

And I see all of my lies 

The truth always comes a calling 

And we all must pay our dues 

Because hindsight doesn't care 

If I win...or if I lose 

It's not funny any more 

Now my life is in the balance 

I can see that comedy 

Was not one of my talents 

[thehumanplauge]

Ode to a Junkie

Every up has a down 

Every in has an out 

Every junkie has a sober 

He just can't live without 

Every man has a woman 

Every woman has a tear 

If the man she loves 

Just can't steer clear 

Every day he doesn't use 

One day closer to the goal 

Relapse is at the door 

To take away his soul 

The revolving door 

In and out...up and down 

“He's still breathing!!” 

In his chest a faint beat sounds 

The questions are so easy 

It's the answers no one knows 

What's causing so much pain 

These highs and these lows 

Every junkie has his day 

Be it death or sobriety 

A choice that must be made 

By both him and society 

Fringe dwellers are not evil 

Only misunderstood 

Judgement's cast by all 

Both bad and good 

Shed a tear for the woman 

Who's seen every in and out 

Every up and down 

She can easily live without

[thehumanplauge]

The Way I See It

We all see things differently 

Is the glass half empty or is it half full? 

A slight angle can change appearances decidedly 

Turning a flat surface into a ball 

I have always seen life from afar 

Like looking at ants...but they are not looking at me 

Too busy to stop and smell the roses 

So busy we just can’t see 

Even though we must all do our daily grind 

To allow the chores of life to define us 

Something that could be so regrettable 

Striking a balance is a must

What we see is often not what it appears 

A slight of hand or a magician's illusion 

Or to gauge the size of an object from afar 

Something to compare it to is the solution 

Opinions are not facts, that's a fact 

Yet so many see their own as being so 

Pushing agendas or converting unbelievers 

Making certain an ill wind will blow 

Our senses are five in total 

Losing one makes the others more acute 

Which one couldn't you do without? 

Sight’s the one, no dispute 

Look up into the night sky 

See the stars twinkling and milky way's glow 

Their light takes millions of years to get here 

Looking into the past through a starlit window 

Our reflections hurtle outwards at the speed of light 

Images of our lives cast out to eternity 

Distance becomes the shutter on the camera 

Capturing each moment of life’s diversity 

I see our planet Earth is in crisis 

Humans have changed the very nature of her being 

And really...what are we without her? 

It's drastic action, not complacency, we should be seeing

[thehumanplauge]

What Price Your Dignity

I watched on helplessly 

The decline was steep 

That brilliant mind 

His arms so strong 

The choice to go 

Not his to make 

So who is responsible? 

And where were they? 

Would they be brave enough? 

For a life to take 

We pray for mercy 

To die in our sleep 

But that isn't real 

For those who cannot speak 

With their voices lost 

And their right to choose 

Their terms taken away 

With only one thing left to lose 

What price your dignity? 

And not be remembered like that 

His memory reverting 

A childhood reclaimed 

As I spoke to him 

Just a boy to his dad 

But he knew not me 

As his suspicion grew 

He asked, “How do you know about my family?“ 

“I'm your son,” I said 

 Dementia takes away more 

Than just your memories 

If I had asked him before 

Before any of this 

What would he choose? 

Would you choose this? 

Because I know that I won't 

I want my daughters to see 

To go with pride 

And with dignity 

So they won't go through 

What I had to 

A man who was brilliant 

Condemned....yet committed no crime 

Against a society 

Who's compassion is misaligned

We give our pets more 

Than we do our own kin 

For that we should be ashamed 

Because I was ashamed for him 

He hated that place 

Escaping three times 

But only twice they brought him back 

Then he found the freedom he deserved 

I didn't know how to feel 

Was it wrong to feel relief? 

I wouldn't watch an animal suffer 

So why did I have to watch him? 

I pray you never have to see

[thehumanplauge]

Opposites Attract

I could be talking about a law of physics 

When I speak of how opposites attract 

It's also in us that this law applies 

Is this opinion, or is it in fact a fact? 

There are in general two types of people 

They are the givers and the takers 

Both these types see something in the other 

Good guy's and bad...movers and shakers 

Because I'm one of the good guy's 

It's the givers that are my team 

We always feel hard done by 

“Poor me!!” is our cheer squad’s scream 

But in the interests of fairness 

The takers should have their say 

“If it were not for us takers...” 

“Where would you givers give it away?” 

“The takers provide a service” 

“That the givers obviously need” 

“Or else they wouldn't give so much” 

“Without the takers you'd be a sorry lot indeed!!” 

Tired of being taken by those dirty rascal takers 

The givers stop their giving to show they are not fakers 

The takers are unmoved exclaiming, “We don't give a toss!!” 

“You givers do whatever you want, it will be at your own loss!!” 

Alone at last the givers look to give, but then they find 

A giver loves to give but taking is not on their mind 

“Without anyone to give to, we really are a sorry lot” 

Meanwhile at the takers, no one is giving away squat 

A solution is what is needed, so a delegation is convened 

There needs to be a compromise, and some attitudes subvened 

When the dust had settled and ideologies were sacked 

The laws of physics do apply when opposites attract

[thehumanplauge]

I Don’t Want to Burn in Hell

To who should I turn? 

Pray someone tell 

Does anyone know... 

How to avoid burning in hell? 

The Catholics say us 

But the Muslims disagree 

I'm so confused 

And I fail to see 

If the Christians are right 

Then the Hindus are wrong 

Man those Rasta's are cool 

Should I just hit the bong? 

One hundred forty four thousand 

Jehovah's going to heaven 

What about the rest of us? 

Will there be Armageddon? 

They can't all be correct 

So who should I choose? 

There's so much at stake 

With my soul to lose 

I would pray to God 

But which one is best? 

Is it Allah or Shiva? 

Is this some kind of test? 

Because I don't want to burn 

Although I won't be alone 

There will be so many others 

In hell will be thrown 

I'm beginning to think 

It could all be a hoax 

From whom can I learn? 

The truth could I coax 

If it is all a lie 

And my fear is unfounded 

Does that mean the end? 

I don't like how that sounded 

Because to burn in hell 

It used to sound bad 

But compared to nothingness 

There with Lucifer I'll be glad

[thehumanplauge]

Life

With age comes some measure of success 

And along with it a bitter irony of sorts 

Finding the failures of life are more important 

Learning more from the tumbles and the falls 

Becoming less aware of the reasons 

Swept under the carpet.... 

As daylight appears under the door 

A brighter day will surely come 

Hope rides the rays of sunshine through our lives forevermore 

As sunset draws the blinds of mortality 

The dreams we had all turn to dust 

In the end nothing matters anyway 

A generation's passing and all trace of us is lost 

I have seen what's at the end of the rainbow 

There is no pot of gold to be found 

Just a lifetime of memories and regrets 

Coming in and going out alone 

If only I were an artist 

Imagining the colours of life strong and bold 

Painting pictures of fields abundant 

Youth and all it's joyous tales to be told 

Then, as age overcomes our presence 

Where are the one's we brought to the fore 

Listening for their pitter patter footsteps 

Down the corridors of time, and all to soon are gone 

A life that is worthy of more 

Lessons to learn and respect to teach 

So busy chasing dreams so elusive 

Dreams we are sold that seem to be always just out of reach 

Success is the measure of a man 

And as he bows for his final curtain 

Failure stands alone and staring into the distance 

Of a dark and melancholy dawn

[thehumanplauge]

True Love

The only true love that exists

Is for the child...

Whose love for you cannot match

And only when they hold a child of their own...

Will they know true love

An endless cycle of awakening