thehomeforthehopelessromantics

[thehomeforthehopelessromantics]

Hello! I was just wondering if there was going to be an update on it's always been you and me? Thanks!!

I... I got one of these messages? This is new. How exciting😁 Hey Dollie! It’s always been you and me is completed. Parts 1 and 2 are both up. I linked it just so you can go to. Let me know if you get to it alright. Thanks for hitting me up! Have a good night! ✌🏾😇

https://thehomeforthehopelessromantics.tumblr.com/post/183758499027/its-always-been-me-and-you-part-2

[thehomeforthehopelessromantics]

After all this time Part IV:

Last part! Credits to @jermeeeeee for helping me figure out the title. Hope you enjoy!

(Y/N)’s POV

I could hear the headlines now. College girl confronted by love of her life; dies of a lack of oxygen before he can really say anything.

At least it’ll be an interesting story.

“Can I come in?” Blu asked, staring at me with those big hopeful eyes. I wanted to say something but all I could do was muster up a hum and step out of the way so he could enter. “This place hasn’t changed at all, huh?” He looked back at me with a smile that was almost friendly and I didn’t know how much more of this I could take. He slipped off his jacket and took off his shoes, putting them with the rest of them and I had to remind myself that this wasn’t normal anymore. That he hadn’t been in my apartment for over a year now. So why does he look like he still belongs here?

“Are you gonna come talk to me or just stare?” He joked with a teasing smile. Shaking my head in an attempt to clear it, I shut the door and went past him to sit on the chair in the living room. It was dreadfully uncomfortable and existed in our living room purely for aesthetics (which Neo claims is super important) but right now I don’t know if I could stomach sitting next to him on the couch so the chair it is.

He sat down on the couch before looking at me and laughing lightly, “I know that it’s been a while since we’ve been face to face like this but you can try not to look like you’ve seen a ghost.”

“It’s just...” I clenched my jaw, staring at him still. Trying to remember a time when he wasn’t existing in my apartment and failing miserably. “It’s weird. Having you here again. It feels like-“

“Like we never broke up?”

“Yeah,” I whispered, sinking into the chair, wishing it would swallow me whole. His friendly demeanor slipped away as he shifted to sit on the edge of the couch, arms hanging over his knees as he leaned toward me.

“(Y/N), why did we break up?”

Because I’m a coward. Because I was terrified. Because I’m not good for you.

“You know why we broke up,” I said lowly, noticing that my music had stopped playing. The playlist must have ended. A part of me wanted to go and play more music just so there won’t be the silence that surrounds us right now.

“No, actually,” he shook his head. “I don’t.”

I could tell he was waiting for my to say something but I couldn’t even move. My heart was pounding and my palms were sweaty. I felt like I was taking up too much space in the room and wanted nothing more but to shrink.

“I... I remember you saying that it wasn’t working anymore. That we weren’t working anymore. I’d never had something chill me to the core like hearing you say that. But as many times as I asked you never told me why we weren’t working anymore.”

Because we worked. We worked so well and I couldn’t lie well enough to give reasons.

“Because it wasn’t any of your concern,” I heard the icy words roll off my lips, surprised by the fact that my voice wasn’t shaking even though every other part of me was.

“Not any of my-“ he gaped, eyes widening. “You stood there and ripped my heart out of my chest and can sit there and say I didn’t deserve a reason why?” He almost yelled, getting increasing more frustrated the longer he spoke. “Besides, what does it matter if you tell me now? We’re not together anymore regardless.”

He huffed, pouting slightly while staring at his palms and all I wanted to do was get up and curl into him and never let him go again. I stayed quiet, trying to think of what to say next and all I could come up with was the truth. “I wasn’t good for you,” I whispered, silently hoping he didn’t hear me.

I saw a puzzled look cross his face as he looked up at me. “What?”

Clearing my throat, I shifted so my legs were under me in the chair. “I just wasn’t any good for you, Blu. We both know that.”

“Bullshit,” he spat, looking more offended than I anticipated. “If you’re gonna lie to me at least make it believable.” My jaw dropped. The first time I’m telling him the truth about what happened and now I’m being called a liar?!

“Whoa whoa whoa, I don’t know who you think you’re talking to but it sure as hell isn’t me,” I snapped, glaring at him. “Lose the attitude.”

“Stop lying to me and maybe I won’t have an attitude.”

“What makes you think I’m lying to you?”

“Because that’s bull. Everyone knows that you were one of the best things that ever happened to me.”

“That doesn’t mean I was ever good for you.” Our eyes met in a hard stare off and slowly I saw his face morph into one of shock.

“Oh my god you actually believe that, don’t you?”

“Would I have said it if I didn’t?” I crossed my arms over my chest and turned my head to stare at a far point on the wall. “I’m flighty and I change my mind too fast. You would’ve only ended up hurt.”

“I did get hurt,” he grumbled.

“More hurt,” I turned to look at him, emphasizing my point. “I’m not the kind of girl you need, Blu. You need consistency and dependability and I’m always gonna be scared that I’m gonna wake up and feel something different than when I went to sleep and I’m gonna hate myself for hurting you like that.”

“As if you didn’t already?” He exclaimed, and I clamped my jaw shut, forcing myself to stay quiet. “When we went to sleep that night you loved me and when we woke up suddenly we weren’t working.” I kept a blank face, praying that he wouldn’t see right through me. “That is what actually happened right?” His voice lowered, no longer yelling but genuinely inquiring. I must have been silent for too long cause the next thing out of his mouth was, “Dammit, (Y/N), say something.” 

“That’s not what happened,” I mumbled, moving my eyes down to the floor. “I didn’t just wake up and not want you anymore. I’m still stunned that you believed that I did.” 

“You broke my heart and the whole time you still wanted me?” he asked, getting angry all over again, voice rising. “Why would you do that to yourself? To me?”  “There was nothing else I could do!” I said exasperatedly, wishing that he would just understand and let it go.

“You could’ve told me the truth!” He stood to his feet, eyes blazing as he stared down at me

“And say what Blu?” I yelled back, moving so I was standing too with my hands on my hips, totally unaffected by the height difference between us. “How on earth was I supposed to tell you I want you, but I’m leaving?”  “Just like that!”  “You would never have let me walk out that door!” 

“I’m still mad at myself for letting you leave at all!” 

“Why?” I screamed in frustration, my hand tearing through my curls. “Why are you still so hung up on me?”  “Because I still want you!”

“After all this time?!”

“Yes!” He said before taking a deep breath. “I don’t know why you’re not getting this. For me it’s always gonna be you.” 

“Bullshit,” I rolled my eyes, turning and going into my room with him hot on my heels. 

“It’s not bullshit.” I felt his hand slip around my arm and tug me back to look at him. “Unlike you I’m not a liar.” I saw the regret on his face the second the words left his mouth, but you couldn’t have convinced me to care. Scowling, I ripped my arm from his grasp before muttering a quick, “Get the fuck out.” 

Tearing at my clothes, I looked for something to slip on. I needed to get out of here, fast. “I’m not going anywhere, (Y/N).” His hands came out on either side of me, stopping my frantic search for something to put on. “What are you doing?”  “Leaving.” I tore myself away from him, not liking the warmth that came along with him being that close to me. Screw the clothes. Where are my shoes?  I slipped on my sneakers and tried to grab my keys, but they were snatched from my grasp. If looks could kill he’d be 6 feet under by now. “What?”

“You’re not leaving.” He held the keys above his head as I tried to reach for them.  “Stop acting like I won’t climb you to get my keys back. Hand em over,” I commanded, feeling foolish for jumping for them at all. 

“If you want ‘em back you’re gonna have to climb me then,” he shrugged. “I’m not leaving.” 

“God, what do you want?” I stomped out of frustration, letting out a growl. Maybe I was being childish and throwing a tantrum, but he came into my apartment and started yelling. It’s fair game, now. 

“I just want you to talk to me,” he said pleadingly, free hand reaching out for me, but I moved out of the way. “(Y/N), please.” 

“Please what?” I crossed my arms, giving him a pissed off stare. 

“Talk to me,” he begged. “Just tell me what’s going on in your head when you think of me.” 

“Right now? All I can think is that I want you to shut up and get out of my apartment before I do something stupid like tell you I’m still in love with you.” I rolled my eyes before freezing. Oh. Shit. 

“What did you just-”  “No.” I said firmly, looking at his face that was riddled with shock and surprise and happiness. “No, you didn’t hear that. That didn’t happen.” 

“Baby-”  “Don’t fucking call me that,” I screamed pitifully, screwing my eyes shut. I heard him set the keys down and take soft steps closer to me. I wanted to protest, but I knew if I moved an inch I’d snap and everything would come pouring out of me and I’d kiss him and ruin this more than I already have. 

I felt a tentative hand place itself on my waist, pulling me closer. I just squeezed my eyes tighter. “Can you open your eyes please?” I shook my head stiffly, refusing to budge. I heard him let out a sigh before I felt his lips press themselves on my forehead. I sucked in a sharp breath. “Please?” I shook my head again, softer this time. His lips pressed a soft kiss to each of my cheeks, muttering a ‘please?’ in between. His face came to hover dangerously close to mine, foreheads pressed together. Out of curiosity and the need to find out if he still looked as breathtaking as I remember up close, I opened my eyes to see him staring at me adoringly. “You still love me?” He asked softly, a small smile on his face. 

“I shouldn’t,” I whispered, finally letting myself give in and relax under his touch. 

“But you do?”

“Yeah... yeah I do.” I brought my hands up to touch his chest, feeling his racing heartbeat under my palms. 

“(Y/N)...” he started with a shaky breath. “I know that this might be a lot for me to ask right now, but I have to try or I’m gonna scream.” He swallowed thickly, eyes searching for mine. “Can I kiss you?”

Before I could stop myself I was muttering a soft, “God, please.” 

Without a second thought his lips crashed on mine and he groaned instantly, bringing me closer. Dizzily I moved to wrap my arms around his neck, kissing him back hungrily, having forgotten how good he felt pressed against me. I felt his tongue swipe against my bottom lip, asking for entrance, but I denied just to mess with him. Feeling him grin against my lips, he moved a hand from my waist to wrapped around my neck. Unintentionally I gasped, giving him all the time he needed to invade my mouth. 

My hands found his hair and tangled themselves in it, wanting nothing more in the world than to be closer to him. Teasingly, I bit down on his bottom lip which lead him to wince, while his grip on me tightened. 

He mumbled a quick, ”Jump,” between kisses and I happily complied. He caught me and my legs wrapped themselves around him while his hands held me under my thighs, preventing me from dropping. Lips still attached to mine, he walked us to the bed and placed me down on it, climbing on top of me.

“You taste,” he mumbled, moving down to my neck, “exactly like,” he bit down, causing a moan to escape my lips, “I remembered.” He licked a stripe up my neck and my skin felt like it was burning and every part of me was buzzing.

“Oh yeah? And what do I taste like?” I tried to chuckle but it quickly turned into a heady moan as he found my sweet spot and my back arched into him.

Grinning against my skin, he laughed lightly before making his way back up to my face, a teasing smile on his lips. “Peaches,” was all he said before he was kissing me again. I tried to touch him, but my hands were quickly grabbed and pinned above my head. “Keep them here,” he ordered, positioning himself between my legs and grinding down slightly as I hit my lip to contain whatever unholy sound was trying to pass through my lips. “Got it?”

I shook my head and he grinned wickedly. “Good girl.” And just like that he was kissing me again. Licking into my mouth and sucking on my bottom lip like there was nothing else in the world he’d rather be doing. He moved my legs to wrap around his waist and gripped my hips so tightly, I was sure it was gonna leave bruises, but I couldn’t find it in me to mind. It was blissful sensory overload and the best (and worst part) was I couldn’t touch him. I was completely at the mercy of what he wanted and everything about that excited me. He ground into me again and we both groaned into the other’s mouth. Maybe this was too much, but how could I care when he felt this good?

His lips parted from mine, both of us heaving to try to fill our lungs with air. I looked up into his eyes and saw that his pupils were totally blown out and he was eyeing me with lust oozing off of him. He started to say something when the shrill of my phone pierced the air. Groaning for an entirely different reason this he dropped his head into my neck as I reached over for the phone (which was proving to be more difficult than I thought with him practically lying on top of me.) “Don’t answer it,” he pleaded, moving his head back up so I could see the pout on his face. “Tell whoever it is to go to hell and let’s just kiss some more.”

That sounded like an offer that was too good to refuse but one look at the caller and I knew I couldn’t. “It’s Neo, I have to answer it.”

Begrudgingly he climbed off of me, letting me lie back against the pillows to take the call. “Hello?” I answered as Blue leaned down, pressing kisses up and down my mostly exposed leg. It was distracting to say the least but I tried to focus on what Neo was saying instead of the boy whose lips were pressed against my skin.

“Hey girlie, what you up to?” He asked happily and I blushed.

“Just y’know, having some fun,” I said and Blu grinned up at me, before coming up to whisper in my ear,

“If I’m the fun you’re having, you can have me anytime.” He then procceeded to place a kiss underneath my ear.

“That’s cool, so would you mind if I didn’t come home tonight?”

“Didn’t come home?” I questioned, grabbing Blu by the back of his collar to stop his attack on my neck.

“Yeah, Dalton asked me to stay the night. You mind?”

This was one of the reasons I love Neo. No matter what we’re doing we always try to keep the other one posted.

“Go ahead, babe. Knock him dead,” I smiled. Happy as hell that my best friend sounded so happy.

“You’re the best, I love you.”

“Love you more. Details tomorrow?”

“Oh absolutely,” he gushed before saying goodbye and hanging up. Glancing over at Blu who had made home tangled up next to me on the bed, he was smiling.

“So Neo is staying the night at my place. Dalton just texted me.”

“Apparently he is. Their night must’ve gone very well,” I laughed, turning my body so I was facing him.

“Guess that means you’re stuck with me for the night.” He tugged me closer to his chest, the smile never leaving his face.

“I guess so, whatever are we gonna do all night?”

“Whatever,” he kissed my forehead, “you want to.” He kissed my lips, but just before it became a full on makeout I stopped and pulled back. “What’s wrong? Did I push it too far?” He asked with concern all over his face and my heart melted a little.

“God, no,” I reassured, diving a hand into his hair. “I just don’t wanna get too caught up tonight. Don’t wanna go too far and have this be something you regret in the morning-“

“I wouldn’t,” he said with absolute surety. “Not a single second spent with your is something I regret. But if you’d rather I just stay here and hold you close while we sleep,” He smiled softly, “I can do that.”

***

I woke up the next morning, breathing in an intoxicating scent that was definitely not my perfume. My eyes opened and the events from last night flooded my head. I was curled into his chest and he was still sound asleep: or he was until I tried to get up and he promptly held me tighter.

“Don’t go.”

“Blu, I have to pee.”

“Hold it,” he mumbled into my hair, his grip on me not loosening a bit.

“Blu,” I whined.

“You’re not leaving this bed until you have to.”

“But I have to pee.”

He pulled back to look at me, rubbing sleep from his eyes. “Promise you’ll come back to me?”

I couldn’t help but grin. “I promise.”

He finally let me get up and go to the bathroom before doing the same thing himself and then we just curled back in bed. His fingers lightly tracing the features of my face.

“I never thought I’d have you as the first thing I see in the morning again.”

“And yet here we are,” I mused.

“This isn’t a dream right? My feelings are gonna be so hurt if you’re just a dream,” he laughed but I could tell part of him was serious. Grabbing the hand that was currently tracing my jaw, I opened my eyes to look at him.

“This is real, I’m real.” I kissed the tips of his fingers. “And I promise I’m not going anywhere ever again.”

“ I love you.” Leaning in, his nose brushed mine lightly. “You still love me?”

“More than you know.”

[thehomeforthehopelessromantics]

After All This Time Part III:

Blu’s POV

Too far, bro. Way too far.

A irritated look crossed over my face as I watched the movie The Perfect Date on Netflix. The main guy was being a jerk and it was getting on my nerves. I knew it would get better, but still I couldn’t stop annoyance from running through me.

I grabbed another handful of popcorn and stuffed my mouth as Cole came out of his room, fully dressed.

“Where you going?” I asked as I swallowed the popcorn.

“I’m gonna get him another bag of gummy bears. He’s out and we both know he needs them,” Cole said, glancing at Dalton’s shut door in worry. Honestly, I was so used to being the one with a miserable love life that seeing Dalton like this was bothering me more than anything. He’s done nothing but go to class, come home, lock himself in his room and eat gummy bears, the only thing he claims makes him feel better when he’s sad. All I can think is that he won’t feel better when he has to go to the dentist for cavities. Still, I wanted him to grow up and talk to Neo, but I tried suggesting that and almost got my head ripped off so I learned the hard way to butt out of it.

Cole went to the door and opened it before letting out a shocked, “What are you doing here?”

I craned my neck to see who he was talking to, but the door was blocking my view. Who is that?

“Oh thank god, you guys still live here,” I heard a distinctly female voice say in relief while every bone in my body tensed up. “Can I come in? Please? This is really important.”

On autopilot I stood and started towards the door.

There’s no way.

“I don’t think that’s a good-“

“Please, Cole. You know I wouldn’t have shown up if it wasn’t important,” I heard the voice beg and I finally saw (Y/N) standing there in a baby blue sweater with a faded dog on it and a pair of jeans. Her pleading eyes looked over at me and it knocked the wind out of me.

“No way,” I whispered in awe. She was here. Standing outside my apartment. Asking to come in. “Wha-what are you doing here?”

“(Y/N), I really think that you should g-“ Cole started and abruptly stopped at the sharp look I cut him. “Actually, I-I’m just gonna go to the store. I’ll be back soon.” He buzzed past her, obvious not wanting to be apart of this conversation anymore.

My eyes went back to her, standing in front of me suddenly looking very nervous. We stood there in silence for a while, her staring at her feet and me staring at her.

“I umm..” she started, before swallowing thickly. “I didn’t... it didn’t occur to me that you’d be home. I really didn’t think this through.” Her hand dove into her curls and I had to stop myself from thinking of playing with her hair in the early morning or when we were watching a movie, or pulling on it during-

Jesus get it together, Blu.

“If you didn’t think I’d be home then why are you here?”

“I came to talk to Dalton.” Unintentionally my heart sank. So much for hoping she wanted to apologize and try again, huh? Stupid thing to wish for.

I tried not to let it shake me too much as I crossed my arms, leaning against the door frame. “Dalton? What do you wanna talk to him about?”

***

Y/N’s POV

“Dalton? What do you wanna talk to him about?” He asked, leaning against the door frame and crossing his arms, looking effortless gorgeous to a point where it was slightly irritating.

“About Neo,” I finally said, after I forced myself to stop gawking at him. “He’s miserable and I’ve tried everything else, and I don’t know what to do now. So I’m here.” I let out a deep sigh, eyes moving around to look at anything but him. I really, really hadn’t thought this through. If I did it’d have occurred to me that Blu would be here and that I might have to talk to him and that all this was a bad idea in the making.

“Neo is my best friend in the whole world, Blu. And he really likes Dalton and...” I raised my eyes to look at him and he stood there in the same position as before, face unreadable. “Neo shouldn’t be hurting because I can’t get my love life together. Dalton had every right to call me a bitch and-“

“He still shouldn’t have done it,” he said almost bitterly, clenching his jaw. “You’re not a bitch, Y/N.”

I need him to never say my name again. It sounded too soft and pretty leaving his lips and it makes me wanna kiss him and he needs to not say it again but I’d be lying if I said I didn’t want to hear it again.

“That isn’t the argument I came to get into, but for the record, any girl who does to you what I did will always be a bitch in the eyes of your best friends.” And to herself.

“Y/N, stop. He still shouldn’t have-“

“Can you please stop doing that?” I almost begged, screwing my eyes shut to contain myself.

“Stop doing what?”

“God,” I said exasperatedly, eyes still shut as I threw my head back slightly. “Please. Stop. Saying. My. Name.”

“Stop saying your name?” He asked and I open my eyes to see that he was no longer against the door frame, but was bracing himself on it on either side of him. “Why?”

“Just... Stop. Please,” I scowled at the rawness that had found home in my voice. A look that I wasn’t sure what it meant crossed his face and I decided I’d had enough. I took a deep breath to reset myself before setting my face into a hard look.  “Look, I came here to talk to Dalton. Not you. So are you gonna let me in so I can do what I came here for or not?” I snapped, putting a hand on my hip.

He paused for a second, looking me up and down before meeting my eyes with a smirk. “Not.”

Before I could comprehend what he was saying, he was trying to shut the door in my face. Without thinking I jammed my foot in between, grinding my teeth at the pain that shot through it as the door made contact with my foot.

“Shit,” I winced and the door was promptly opened again. I knelt down and held my foot in my hands as if that would help.

“Are you crazy? What the hell are you doing? I could’ve just broken your foot,” he scolded, looking at me like I was insane. Maybe I was, but I really couldn’t bring myself to care. 

“I’m well aware,” I seethed, through gritted teeth. “I hope now you understand just how far I’m willing to go to get in and talk to him.” I flexed my foot a bit, before standing to see if I could still stand on it, thanking the gods that I could. “I’m not messing around when I say that if you shut this door on me again I’m gonna break it. I’m not here for me, I’m here for Neo and that makes all the difference in the world.” 

“You’d really do anything to get in here and talk to him, huh?” he said in awe, with a look in his eye that should’ve made me more nervous than anything, but instead I was intrigued. 

“I think the foot that you almost broke is a testament to that,” I agreed, crossing my arms under my chest. I saw his eyes flash there for a moment before coming back to my eyes. “So? What’s it gonna take? You gonna let me in or not?”  

“I want 10 minutes,” he said with absolute surety and I scrunched my face in confusion. “I want 10 minutes. I want to talk to you about what happened between us.” 

“You’re bullshitting me,” I said almost immediately. There’s no way I could do that. I’d managed to stay away from him for over a year now. 10 minutes? It’d totally destroy everything I fought myself to do. 

“That’s my price for getting in here. You wanna talk to Dalton, I want 10 minutes. Deal?” He offered a hand for me to shake and I just eyed him skeptically. 

“No way.” I slapped his hand away and rolled my eyes at him. “You’re crazy. That was a year ago. What’s left to talk about?”

“A year and seven months, actually,” he corrected and I felt my jaw drop. Why does he remember that? He stepped outside of the door frame and closer to me, so close I knew I’d leave here smelling like his cologne. “And something tells me that you know as well as I do that there’s a lot left to talk about.” His voice dropped an octave as he spoke. He slowly reached out and tucked a stray curl behind my ear and my skin felt like it was on fire.

“Blu,” I whispered breathlessly. Seeing that I hadn’t shied away from his touch, he took it upon himself to place a gentle hand on my cheek.

“All I’m asking for,” he stepped even closer to where our bodies almost touched. I could have leaned up and kissed him if I wanted to, “is 10 minutes.”

I slapped his hand away again and stepped back, needing the dizziness of being that close to him again to go away. Taking a deep breath, I shook my head. Trying to rid myself of the haze. “Fine. You get 10 minutes.”

A grin wider than I’d ever seen spread on his face.

“But,” I continued, seeing the happiness in his eyes falter for moment. “You only get them if Neo and Dalton make up. If I leave here after talking to him and nothing changes then no dice. Deal?” I offered a hand, ready to get this over with and finally go talk to Dalton.

A satisfied smirk crossed his face as he grabbed my hand. “Deal.”

***

“Get out of here,” Dalton snarled at me as I tentatively entered his room.

“Dalton-“

“I said leave.” His face might’ve been buried in a pillow but I could hear every ounce of seriousness in his voice. A small part of me recoiled. I hadn’t had a proper conversation with Dalton since me and Blue stop speaking. I remember him being goofy and friendly, instantly making me feel welcome wherever we were. It made me miss the days when we were friends. Y’know before I went and broke his best friends heart.

“Just listen to m-“

“Get the fuck out!” He screamed, finally moving from being face down on his bed to face me.

“I’m not going anywhere,” I screamed back, straighten out my posture and staring at him firmly.

“How the hell did you get in here anyway?”

“Blu let me in,” I said, trying to keep my resolve under his hateful glare.

He let out a loud scoff and rolled his eyes that I noticed were slightly puffy. Had he been crying? “Of course he did. God,” he ran a hand through his already tousled hair, “I wish he’d get over you already.” He paused to look me square in the eye. “You’re not worth it.”

Clenching my jaw, I shut his door and leaned against it. “I agree,” I said calmly, shrugging my shoulders, moving to sit cross cross on the floor near the door.

“What?” He asked roughly, sounding thrown off.

“I said I agree.” I looked at him firmly. If I remembered anything about Dalton it was that he doesn’t take well to someone who cowers at him. If you want to talk to him you’re gonna have to put your foot down. “I don’t think I’m worth it either. We both agree that Blu would be much better off if he forgot about me entirely.”

“You... believe that?” He asked disbelievingly. I know he intended upon hurting my feelings (and definitely succeeded) but he couldn’t hurt me too bad when I agreed with him.

“Try not sound so shocked,” I mumbled. “Why else do you think I left him? You really think it’s cause I wanted to?” I said softly, a trace of regret and sadness lingering in my voice. The words left my lips before I could stop myself. Dalton was always easy to talk to and it appears that old habits die hard. I sunk my teeth into my bottom lip as Dalton stared at me with surprise written on his face.

“Don’t look at me like that,” I chastised. “Besides that’s not what I came here to talk to you about.”

“It’s not?” He asked, voice lowering from his previously raised tone.

“I have other people I can cry to about my poor love life choices, Dalton.” I deadpanned.

“Then why are you here? To see me hating the world? Alone and miserable,” he mumbled the last part to himself, probably thinking I wouldn’t hear it.

“I’m here to talk about Neo,” I said, staring at him to gauge his reaction to Neo’s name. To my delight, I saw a flicker of interest in his eyes.

Bingo.

“What about Neo? Is he okay?” He drew his eyebrows together, face contorting in concern.

“Not at all,” I sighed. “He’s been walking around for the last month moping. He’s stopped eating as much, he barely talks to me anymore when he comes home, he just goes in his room and blasts sad music for hours and I just can’t take it anymore.” I let my head bang against the door as I lifted my eyes to the ceiling. “All I want is him happy and right now he isn’t and I’d do anything to change that.”

“(Y/N) what are you trying to say?” He asked, voice barley above a whisper. Looking back at him, I saw he was now sitting on the edge of the best, gripping his comforter for dear life, breathing getting more and more shallow by the second.

“He misses you, Dalton,” I said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. Like c’mon, why else would I show up here if it wasn’t for Neo?

“Bullshit,” he hissed almost immediately. “If he misses me so much why hasn’t he called?”

“For the same reason you haven’t called him,” I fired back and he closed his mouth staring at me, looking conflicted.

After a few beats of silence and a mini stare off, he let his whole body sag. “He really misses me?” He asked, sounding sublimely insecure. A part of me wanted to go and give him a hug, but I knew that he’d have my head on a silver spike.

“Would I have come here if he didn’t?” A sarcastic laugh escaped my throat. “I wouldn’t have put myself through seeing Blu again if it wasn’t for a good reason, Dalton.”

He stared at me for a second before nodding his head. “I believe you.”

I felt a small smile grow on my face. Him believing me meant that my coming here wasn’t a waste of time. It meant that there was a chance that him and Neo would make up and I could stop feeling like the worlds worst best friend.

“I have a question,” he asked, sounding more hesitant than he had throughout this entire conversation. “And don’t lie to me. I’ll know if you’re lying.”

“Don’t say stuff like that. You’ll make me nervous,” I joked, trying to stop my head from racing with all the questions he could ask right now.

“I’m serious, (Y/N). This isn’t a joke to me.”

“You’re seriously making me nervous now. What is it?”

“Do you still love him?” He asked it as if it was the simplest question in the world meanwhile I couldn’t even breathe. I clamped my jaw shut and stared at him hard, silently begging him to take it back. To not ask me that. “You do, don’t you?” He asked again when he felt like I’d take too long to respond.

I shook my head wordlessly before letting my head drop. “Yeah,” I whispered, defeatedly. “I’ve tried not to, but don’t think I’m ever gonna be able to stop.”

“If you love him then why did you leave him?”

The question hung in the air and he might as well have put his hands around my neck and squeezed because breathing was the only thing I couldn’t do at the moment.

He let out a weary sigh and my eyes flicked to him. “When we came home that day he was just standing there, frozen. We finally got him to talk to us, he just collapsed and starting crying and saying ‘this can’t be happening’ over and over again. You really hurt him, y’know.”

“I know,” I whispered, seeing Blu’s devastated face from that night flash before my eyes. “Dalton, I know you probably hate me for what I did, but you should know that leaving him was the hardest thing I’ve ever done.”

We sat in silence for a few minutes. Both mulling over our friends and love lives. “Can you...” I started, pausing unsure if I should ask this of him. “Can you not tell him what I said? I really don’t want him to know any of this.”

“You don’t want the guy you’re in love with to know you’re in love with him?” He asked incredulously. “You’re joking, right?”

“I’m not joking. He really doesn’t have to know this.”

“He’s my best friend, you know I have to tell him.”

“You really don’t.”

“I’m not you, I can’t hide stuff from my best friend.”

“Don’t even go there,” I glared, thinking about if it’d be worth it to slap the smirk off his face . “You have no idea why I didn’t tell Neo.”

“Then enlighten me.”

“Since when do I answer to you?”

“And since when do I have to follow your requests?”

“Since I started begging,” I bargained. “Please, please don’t tell him. If he really has to know any of this can it at least come from me?”

“How do I know you’re not gonna just lie to him and say you don’t want him again?”

“Because lying to him a second time might kill me.” I ran a hand through my curls. “Just promise me you’ll let me tell him.”

He contemplated it for a moment before silently nodding his head. Letting out a breath I didn’t know I was holding, I got up off the floor and grabbed the doorknob, satisfied and prepared to leave.

“I’ll uh...” Dalton started and I turned to look at him, puzzled. “I’ll see you around... bug.”

A smile spread across my face at hearing the old affectionate nickname. “I never thought I’d miss hearing you call me that.”

“I never thought I’d call you that again,” he countered with a small smile. “Now get out of here, before I throw up with the sappy look that you’re giving me.”

“Shut up,” I laughed, shaking my head and opening the door. I almost expected to see Blu waiting in the living room for me but instead it was Cole.

“So did you get what you came for?” He asked with a knowing smile.

“You sly bastard, you were listening weren’t you?”

“Possibly,” he shrugged, leaning back on the couch, spreading his arms out over the back. “Don’t worry, Blu isn’t home. He left saying something about needing to distract himself.”

I gave him a relieved look. “Thank god... so I’ll see you around?”

“If all goes well,” he mused. The grin on his face made me smile without meaning to. “And don’t worry, I’ll keep your secret. But you better tell him.”

“I don’t think I have much of a choice anymore, huh?”

***

Blu’s POV

I’m gonna kill Dalton. It’s been two weeks since (Y/N) showed up here and he hasn’t called Neo. Two. Weeks. He starts talking about him everyday and talks about how much he misses him, but won’t freaking call him.

Today he came home from class giddy and I’d thought that maybe he’d grown up and called him finally, but nope.

He saw him.

Across the quad.

And didn’t say anything to him.

I’m. Gonna. Scream.

Maybe it’s selfish how much I want him to talk to Neo, but it’s not just for my good. It’s for his. The fact that I get to finally talk to (Y/N) when they do make up is just a plus to my best friend being happy.

I had every intention of talking to him and telling him to grow a set basically but when I went into his room he was staring at a something on his phone. Moving quickly before he could turn it off, I snatched it out of his hand.

“Hey,” he exclaimed reaching for the phone that I pulled out of glass. “Give that back!”

“Dalton,” I sighed, shutting my eyes in disbelief. “Are you really in here staring at Neo’s contact instead of just calling him.” I looked at him and he cowered slightly, letting his eyes drop. “This is pathetic, dude. Just call him.”

“I can’t just-“

“Yes you can.”

“No I-“

“Yes, you can,” I emphasized, sitting down on his bed next to him. “15 seconds of insane courage man. See what happens.”

“What if he doesn’t answer?” He debated, looking down at the phone in my hand. “I wouldn’t be able to handle it if he doesn’t answer. It’d be even worse if he did and didn’t want to talk to me.”

“Dude, (Y/N)’s his best friend. What would she tell you to do if she were here?”

“(Y/N) has her own battles to fight,” he said pointedly, suggesting that she should be more worried about me and not Dalton and Neo’s relationship. I silent wished that that’s how it was but it’s not and I glared at him for reminding me of that.

“Well she won’t fight that battle unless you and Neo make up.” I shoved the phone back in his hand. “So if you won’t do it for yourself, call him for me. I can’t get my girl back if you two don’t make up.”

For a second to thought he was gonna slap the taste out of my mouth for calling her my girl, but to my surprise he didn’t. He just sighed. “Fine. I’ll call him.”

“Yes!” I exclaimed, practically jumping off the bed, pumping my fist in the air. 

“But you’ve got to get out of here. This conversation isn’t gonna need witnesses,” he gulped and I know I shouldn’t be I just grinned at him, placing a hand on his shoulder. 

“Don’t worry. Everything’s gonna be fine,” I beamed and for the first time in a long time, I believed it. 

With a shaky breath, Dalton nodded and I gave his shoulder a squeeze before leaving the room to go sit in the living room. I wasn’t moving until I heard if they made up or not, so I turned on the TV and tried to watch something, but instead my mind kept wandering back to (Y/N) and holding her in my arms and being happy and in love and kissing her. 

God, I missed kissing her. 

She was so soft and sweet and tasted like peaches because of the lip balm she uses. I miss her desperate grip on my hair when things got heated and her soft moans when I kissed her neck and just the feeling of her on top of me-- or under me.

I really need my girl back. 

I don’t know how long I sat there losing myself in the thought of her, but Dalton finally came out of his room, fully dressed. I raised an eyebrow, silently asking him where he was headed. 

“I umm...” he blushed, scratching the back of his neck. “Neo asked me to come pick him up from the library. We’re gonna go to Delights and then catch a movie.” 

A wide smile came across my face. “So, you’re going on a date?” He nodded shyly, everything about him oozing excitement. He threw on a jacket and threw a simple, “see you later” over his shoulder and that’s when it hit me. 

Jumping up, I got dressed in the first thing I could find in my closet and darted out the door.

*** 

(Y/N)’s POV

5 new messages

OMG!  DALTON CALLED ME! GOING ON A DATE TONIGHT!  HAVE TO RAIN CHECK SPA NIGHT!  LOVE YOU!

I smiled at my phone as I went as I threw on an oversized t-shirt and shorts before going to my room and turning on some music. Around 15 minutes into my dancing around the apartment, the doorbell rang. I scrunched my face trying to think if I had ordered food or something. 

Opening it, I was met face to face with a hopeful looking Blu, who seemed to just be bursting at the seams. I couldn’t stop a shocked look from crossing my face as I stared at him. 

“W-What are you doing here?”  “I’m here to collect.”  “Collect?” I tilted my head in confusion and the smile on his face only grew if that was even possible. 

“Neo and Dalton made up,” he said confidently, shoving his hands in his jean pockets, “I’m here for my 10 minutes.” 

// @jermeeeeee

[thehomeforthehopelessromantics]

After All This Time Part II:

(I also have no idea how many parts this is gonna be)

(I just love writing angst sooooo)

A month later…

“Why do we always watch this movie? I cry every time,” Neo whined, wiping some of the tears off his face. Moe was here too but when the end scene came up she went and my room and refused to come out until Neo was done crying. Moe was as big a baby as he was so having both of them crying would be totally overwhelming for me.

“Because it’s my favorite movie and you love me.” I rubbed his back soothingly. The ending of Dead Poets Society is absurdly devastating, but I’ve watched it so many times I’m cried out.

“I need to love you less. This is ridiculous,” he mumbled into his palms, trying to still himself.

“You want to go get ice cream?” I offered, knowing that he was a big kid and ice cream always made him feel better.

“Yes, please,” he sniffled and I had to let out a laugh. Works every time.

“Let me go get Moe.” I went to my room to find Moe completely passed out, sprawled across my bed. I shook my head, letting out a sigh. 

Tossing on a random T-shirt and a pair of boyfriend jeans and my combats, I grabbed my keys, and a sleepy Moe who was coming along so I could drop her off at home since she had work in the morning and my big blubbering friend who was wearing a pastel pink hoodie and jeans. We got in the car and I dropped Moe off and then drove us to his favorite ice cream spot. A little shop called, Delights. We both ordered chocolate chip cookie dough and went to wait for our order.

“Y’know the guy I was telling you about?”

“The guy you’ve been completely sprung on? Nope never heard of him,” I said with a straight face as he shoved me back playfully.

“Anyway,” he drawled. “I was talking to him the other day. He tried the ice cream from this place and said he had a friend he had to take here. The guy is trying to get over some girl who apparently left him high and dry. Poor guy.”

I little bit of guilt shot through me as I thought of Blu, but I brushed it off when I heard the door open. Glancing up over I saw two guys at the door and I heard Neo gasp and chirp happily, “Dally!”

Before I knew it he was hugged up with a guy who’s face I recognized instantly. I swear my heart dropped to my toes as I looked behind him and saw the exact person I didn’t want to see.

***

Blu’s POV

“I don’t know why we’re here,” I grumbled. I just wanted to stay at home and be miserable and miss her and watch her favorite movie. Instead I was dragged out of our dorm and to this stupidly happy looking ice cream shop. Delights. What an abnoxiously happy place. Disgusting. “We’re here because someone recommended it, I love ice cream and you need a pick me up,” he said, looking at me pointedly. I just rolled my eyes. I knew his heart was in the right place, but this was the last thing I needed.

“Is this ‘someone’ the guy you’ve been seeing? How long has it been now? A month?” I taunted, taking some joy in watching him turn red at the mention of his guy. Every time he came home from a date, he’d have this dazed look in his eyes and when I ask him how it was he just said “Splendid.”

Dalton is one of the strangest people I’ve ever met, but honestly I don’t know what I’d do without him. How many friends are willing to try and help you get over someone you haven’t been with for a year and half now?

We walked in and I squinted as I took in the bright colors. The walls were a bright baby blue with pastel pink details and it overall kind of hurt to look at. “Dally!” I heard a very obviously male voice say happily before running over and hugging him. I laughed as I repeated the funny nickname to myself. Dally? What is this? The Outsiders?

I almost choked on that laugh when I looked over and saw her. Staring right at me. I know I’d seen her like a month ago but that was all the way across the room. Here she was just a few feet in front of me– a few steps and I could have her wrapped in my arms again. I swear it took everything in me not to just hold her and not let go ever again.

“Hey, babe,” Dalton grinned, hugging the boy who had latched onto him. My attention diverted to them for a second before going back to (Y/N) who was now staring at the floor, fidgeting uncomfortably. “What are you doing here?”

Pulling back, the guy rolled his eyes. “Me and my roommate watched Dead Poets Society and I got upset so she brought me here.�� Turning, the guy ushered (Y/N) over and I saw the look on Dalton’s face change.

“This is my roommate-” “(Y/N)?” Dalton asked incredously, looking over at me nervously. I knew he was worried about me, but right now being this close to her was the clearest my head’s been in months. “Hey, Dalton.” She mumbled, still refusing to look up from the ground, biting her lip.

“You’re Neo’s roommate?!”

“Roommate and best friend since forever.” She smiled ruefully. “I swear, I didn’t know it was you Neo had been seeing recently, I wouldn’t have-”

“Nice shirt,” I chimed with a smile.

I’d recognize the Michael Meyers flipping you off shirt anywhere. It was mine and still far too big for her and still looked better on her than it ever did on me. I’m shocked she still has it. 

Glancing at her shirt confused, she understood and huffed and shut her eyes. I knew it was almost unhealthy how hard I was watching her, but honestly, you couldn’t have paid me to care.

She opened her mouth to say something when the guy at the register called her name. Turning she went and grabbed her ice cream and I saw him slip her a piece of paper that when she turned around she rolled her eyes at and threw away.

When she got back to where we were standing the guy, whose name I’m assuming was Neo, looked at her like she was crazy. “Did that guy just give you his number?”

“Yeah, so?” She shrugged and I felt my jaw clench.

“Why’d you throw it away? The last date you’ve been on was high school! Go get that number out of the trash,” he demanded

Dalton and I made eye contact with each other, both clearly confused. Did he just say the last date she’s been on was high school?

“Shut up, Neo,” she mumbled lowly to him, giving him a pointed look.

“What? No,” he insisted. “You need to go get that guy’s number. He’s cute!” I almost laughed at how Dalton’s face shifted.

“He is?” Dalton asked amusedly.

Neo look flustered for a second before hitting Dalton’s chest. “Shut up.” Dalton in turn grabbed the hand that Neo now had against his chest and kept it there, smiling. “Now like I was saying, high school was way too long ago for you to not-“

“Does he not know?” I interrupted, looking at (Y/N). The fact that she didn’t answer me was answer enough. Her best friend had no idea that me and her were ever together. Talk about a slap in the face.

“Know what?” Neo asked innocently, looking at (Y/N) questioningly. “Wait, how do you all know each other?”

Taking a deep breath, she screwed her eyes shut seemingly dreading what she was about to say. “I know Dalton through Blu.”

“And what do I not know?” Neo turned, looking at her pryingly. When she didn’t respond immediately he put a hand on her shoulder comfortingly. “(Y/N/N)?”

“He’s an old... associate.”

“Associate?” I said incredulously and I saw her wince, eyes still closed. “Do all kiss all your ‘associates?’”

“He’s my ex… something.” She opened her eyes as Neo looked between the two of us in shock.

“Ex-boyfriend,” I clarified without even thinking. There was no way I could stand here and let her try to claim I was just some over attached hookup or an fucking associate.

“We weren’t official,” she snapped back, her voice firm but when she looked over at me something in her eyes wavered slightly.

“Not official?” I raised my eyebrows in shock. “You’re kidding me right?”

“Does it sound like I’m kidding?” she said, looking at me with annoyance, If I wasn’t so dumbstruck at the fact that she doesn’t think we were official, I’d’ve had to stop myself from kissing her cause she look so adorable… okay I have to stop myself from doing that anyway, but I’m less inclined right now.

“So you tell all your ‘not boyfriends’ that you love them?” Her eyes hardened as she stayed silent, the only indication that she’d even heard me was the fact that I saw her hand clench around one of the cups. “Or are you going to deny the fact that you’re the one who said it first like you want to deny that I was,” and still am, “yours?”

She clicked her tongue in annoyance and rolled her eyes, mumbling a quick, “I don’t have to deal with this.” Before handing one of the cups to Neo and then buzzing past me faster than I could comprehend. I almost turned to grab her and stop her from walking away again. I wanted to keep fighting with her. I don’t care if it turned into an all out screaming match, just hearing her voice put some energy back in my bones.

Dalton stopped me before I could get her and keep her in reach. I tried to shake him off but he wasn’t having it. Looking back, I saw her figure walking off into the darkness and into a car that I’m recognized was her blue bug and I felt my heart sink.

I almost had half a mind to slap Dalton for not letting me go after her. “Let go of me,” I scowled, mumbling angrily as he let go and my feet went on auto pilot towards the door when Dalton came and stood in front of me.

Alright, now he’s starting to get on my nerves.

“You’re not going out there, Blu.”

“Why the hell not?” I asked irritatedly. “She’s right there and I’ve been dying to talk to her forever.”

“Yeah and it’s gonna be another lifetime before I let you get this close to her again,” he said with finality in his tone.

I glared at him, hoping he would crack under my stare, but he looked totally unaffected. “I’m not asking for your permission to go have a conversation with my girl.”

“Ex- girl,” he stressed, looking me hard in the eye. “You seem to forget that the bitch broke your heart once upon a time. I’ll be damned if I let her do it again.”

I opened my mouth to tell him to not call her a bitch when I was cut off.

“Whoa whoa whoa,” I heard Neo who I forgot was hear say from behind me. Dalton’s face paled as his eyes shifted over to Neo. Turning, I swear I saw fire shoot through his eyes. “That ‘bitch’ is my best friend and has been forever and I’ll be damned if I let you talk about her like that.”

Dalton’s body language changed the longer Neo talked. I glanced outside, debating if I should just go and let them hash this out but something about the hostile tension in the air made me stay put, just in case. I already knew this conversation wasn’t gonna end well.

“Well Blu has been my best friend too and last time I checked he didn’t break (Y/N)’s heart like she did his.” He crossed his arms, giving Neo a glare.

“I don’t care what she did or didn’t do, don’t call her a bitch, Dalton.” If I thought he wasn’t mad before, the hostile nature of his tone cleared that right up and told me in a fight Neo might just be the one to watch out for. Something in his eyes said that he was capable of way more than he let on.

“Or what? You’ll stop seeing me?” Dalton snapped back, a sarcastic laugh leaving his throat. “For her? Any goddamn day of the week,” Neo sneered.

“Do it then. Make’s no difference to me.” I could’ve slapped Dalton again, but now it’d be for being such a damn liar and a hot head when he’s mad. He knew that he’d care if him and Neo stopped seeing each other. He’s been crazy about him for longer than they’ve been seeing each other.

“Consider it done, babe. Now if you’ll excuse me I’d like to leave the assholes convention and go back to my best friend.”

“Yeah you do that.” He rolled his eyes as Neo walked past him, intentionally shoulder bumping him in the process. Shooting me a glare he left the building and Dalton stood in that same spot, fists balled up at his sides.

“D?” I said hestiantly, unsure of how he was feeling. “Are you okay?”

He snapped around with a swift “I don’t wanna talk about it.” He let out a deep sigh, shutting his eyes to collect himself. “Let’s just go home.”

We left the ice cream shop and I could tell we were both hoping the same car would be in the lot.

***

(Y/N)’s POV

“So do you want to explain how exactly you managed to be in a whole relationship and I didn’t know?” Neo asked pryingly. If it was anyone else I would think that they were pissed off, but I knew him better. He was hurt that I didn’t tell him.

“I’m sorry, I just didn’t know how to tell you,” I tried to reason, forcing myself to keep my eyes on the road rather than looking at my best friend who I just wanted to hug right now.

“A simple ‘hey, by the way, I’m seeing someone’ would’ve done!” he huffed, head snapping in my direction. I winced slightly. I knew I should’ve told him about it right away but I just couldn’t. I don’t know why.

Maybe, because you knew that you actually could see yourself with this guy in the long haul and it scared the crap out of you.

“I just.. I didn’t know how to tell you. It started out innocent flirting and I thought nothing would come of it.” “How do you go from innocent flirting to I love you to strangers all while your best friend has no idea, (Y/N)?”

“Look, I will tell you the whole story when we get home I swear, just please let my heart stop racing. I wasn’t prepared to see him tonight,” I practically begged, my hands clenching the steering wheel. Neo stayed silent for a moment until he sighed and nodded, putting one of his hands on my leg and squeezing it reassuringly.

We made it back to our apartment and went inside and instead of kicking off our shoes and cuddling on the couch we took off our shoes and got changed into our pjs before I went and sat on his bed, preparing myself to say what I should’ve told him a long time ago.

He sat down across from where I sat on the foot of the bed cross legged. “So you ready to explain?”

I nodded my head and took a deep breath. “Okay so… I met him by accident. It was the beginning of the semester I was rushing to get to class and he was standing with Dalton and their other friend Cole and I wasn’t paying attention to where I was going and I ran into him. He helped me pick up my stuff and we talked for a second and then I went to class. When I opened my notebook I saw that he’d somehow written his number and the words ‘when you see this call me’ on it. And I mean come on, I’m not blind, he’s attractive, so I called him after class. I became friends with him and the guys and sure we would flirt, but it really was innocent at first.”

“What changed? When did it stop being innocent?” Neo asked, shifting to sit cross legged. My whole body heated up as I thought about it. I was suddenly glad that the lights were dim cause the look on my face would’ve been enough of an indicator as to what happened.

“Well we were all hanging out at Blu and Dalton’s and we were drunk off our rockers. Cole was on the phone in the Blu’s room talking to his girlfriend and being all pouty about how much he missed her and Dalton was passed out in his room and I was in the kitchen with Blu…”

“You and him? Drunk and alone? Sounds like a great time,” he taunted cheekily and I shoved his shoulder, laughing slightly.

“Shut up,” I rolled my eyes. “So I was sitting on the counter and he was leaning on it next to me and for some reason we couldn’t stop laughing. Literally nothing was funny and yet all I remember doing was laughing. And…”

I wiped the tears from my eyes, holding my sore sides with a ridiculously big smile on my face. “I think that we shouldn’t have had that last shot of whatever it was that Cole gave us,” I giggled, not even being capable of remembering what the name of the drink was.

“Probably not,” he mused, staring at me with bright eyes. I suddenly felt self conscious under his stare.

“Why are you staring at me? Do I have something on my face?” I proceeded to run both my hands over my face multiple times, trying to get rid of whatever was on my face.

I heard him let out a laugh as he grabbed my wrists and pulled my hands from my face, making me aware that he was now standing in front of me, between my legs.

“Why are you so damn cute?” He huffed with a smile.

“Genetics?” I offered, totally unsure of how to respond to that. Maybe if I was sober, I’d have half a mind to blush or say something witty but right now I didn’t even bat an eye.

He chuckled, slinging my arms around his neck before grabbing me by my hips as my breath caught in my chest. He let out a deep sigh. “I really wanna kiss you,” he mumbled, eyes dropping to my lips.

I almost choked on my own spit as my jaw went slightly slack. “But we’re friends. Friends can’t kiss friends. That’s a rule or something right?”

“Friends can kiss friends, there’s no rules in friendship,” he argued, tugging me closer. Some small part of me knew I should stop him, but I didn’t even care. I liked his hands on me and how it felt being this close to him.

“Yes, there are,” I insisted, grabbing a handful of his hair and pulling it to emphasize my point.

His eyes closed for a moment when he let out a short laugh before opening his eyes again. “If you don’t want me to kiss you then I don’t think you should do that again.”

“I never said I didn’t want you to kiss me,” I drawled, rolling my eyes, thinking that this was obvious. “I’ve wanted you to kiss me for a long time. I just said we can’t because we’re friends and friends don’t kiss friends.”

“So you do want me to kiss you?” he asked with a smirk.

“Duh, that was I just said. You’re really bad at keeping up with stuff, huh?” I rambled before I could stop myself and I saw something in his eyes shift. 

“I guess I am,” he mumbled, resting his forehead against mine. “I just... if I said we weren’t friends anymore could I kiss you?” 

“You don’t want to be friends anymore?” I pouted, my heart hurting at the thought of it. He shook his head slightly, eyes glazing over. 

“I don’t wanna be your friend. I want...” he whispered, moving to my neck where he placed soft kisses going up toward my jaw, “to kiss your neck.” 

His head came back up, face hovering dangerously close to mine. I felt myself lean in slightly and my eyes fluttered. He took the hint and pressed his lips to mine. We should’ve been moving slower considering it was our first kiss, but with both of us having too much alcohol coursing through our veins, being gentle and tender went straight out the window. 

Every kiss was heated and intense, like it was the last time this would happen. I pulled on his hair and he moaned into my mouth before letting one of his hand trail down my leg, lifting it to keep it secure around him. The other hand moved up to my neck, settling at the base of it and squeezing slightly. One of my hands clamped around the wrist of the hand that he had on my neck while his tongue invaded my mouth. God, everything about him was intoxicating.

I let one of my hands travel down his chest and up under his shirt and within seconds he was detached from me and the shirt was being thrown somewhere in the room. I grabbed him by the waistband of his sweats and brought him back to me. Maybe I looked a little desperate and needy, but I couldn’t bring myself to care. He didn’t lean in to kiss me this time, just bit down on his bottom lip and stared at me.

“Hey, don’t do that,” I chastised as I grabbed his face and leaned in to kiss him, separating his lips and biting down on his bottom one. “Biting you is my job,” I whispered seductively and he let out a low groan, his grip on me tightening. 

“God, I wish we were alone,” he admittedly breathlessly, eyes roaming all over me before settling on my eyes.

“We are alone,” I teased, feeling a little more sober.  “You know what I mean smart ass.” He rolled his eyes, fighting a smile. 

I hummed out of amusement. Seeing him this riled up was fun. “I’m sure I don’t.” I trailed my hands down his chest, stopping just shy of his waistband as my eyes followed before looking back up at him. If he didn’t look like he was tempted to say screw it and take me right here on the counter before, he sure as hell looked like it now. “We should probably make sure that Cole isn’t dead.”

“Cole’s fine,” he insisted, gripping my hips tighter, as if preparing to not let me move away from him.

“Put your shirt back on Blu,” I ordered, taking my hands off him and putting them on the counter next to me so I can lean back. 

“What if I don’t want to?” He leaned in for a kiss, but I turned my head so it landed on my cheek. He let out a chuckle. “You’re not gonna make this easy are you?” 

“Make what easy?”  “Wanting you,” he said as he made eye contact with me. “It was hard enough before I knew what you tasted like. Now I think I’m screwed.”

I reached up and ran my hand through his hair briefly. “You poor unfortunate soul.” 

Reaching up, he covered my hand that was on the back of his neck with his own hand. “Did you just quote The Little Mermaid at me?” 

“Put your shirt back on and maybe I’ll answer that question.” 

He let out a sigh, seeing that this was a fight he wasn’t going to win and reluctantly removed himself from me and went to put on his shirt. I jumped off the counter, stumbling slightly before starting to walk back towards Blu’s room, where we left Cole. I felt Blu follow me anxiously, the air around us more charged than usual. Even in my drunk haze, I knew that we’d just crossed a bridge that there was no coming back from. 

“Whoa, that’s... hot,” Neo gushed as I came back to reality. “Why didn’t you call me and tell me what happened?! You know I live for dirty details.” 

“I just didn’t, I couldn’t,” I tried to explain. “Every time I started to tell you, I chickened out and then I fell in love and was a complete goner and then I was breaking things off with him and it just never came up. You were finishing your senior year and I was already a freshman. I didn’t want you getting caught up in my drama.” 

He reached out and slapped the side of my head. “Ouch! What the hell was that for?” I asked irritatedly.

“I’m your best friend stupid, it’s my job to help you deal with your drama.” He shook his head at me. “So why did you break up with him?”

“I didn’t break up with him, we weren’t even-“

“Spare me the bull, (Y/N). You said it yourself you were in love with him. Y’all were official. So why the break up?”

“I... It just wasn’t gonna work.” I let my head drop, staring at the palms of my hands. “I wasn’t any good for him.” 

“Why not?”

“I just wasn’t. I knew what kind of girl he needed and I’m never gonna be that, so I left,” I mumbled with a heavy heart. 

“You knew what kind of girl he needed?” he asked, looking as if he was about to face palm. “Are we taking about the same guy who looked half ready to tackle that guy who gave you his number?”

“Stop that,” I laughed slightly, shoving his shoulder. “Don’t make fun of me, I know I’m not what Blu is looking for in the long haul. It was easier to break it off sooner rather than later.”

“What is it that you think he’s looking for?” He asked, giving me a flat look, laying down across the bed.

“I don’t know, someone more...” I searched my brain for the correct word to explain it. “Consistent?”

“Consistent?” He repeated, sruching his face up at me.

“Yeah. Consistent,” I repeated with more surety, shifting to lie on my stomach next to Neo. “I’m flightly and my feelings change fast. The whole time I was with him I was so scared I was gonna go to a party with Moe or something and I’d get too drunk and carried away and I’d mess everything up. Once early on I’d gotten caught up dancing with this guy and had to stop myself because I couldn’t stand the thought of doing something like that to him. I just...”

A deep sigh left my lips as I let my face fall onto the soft blanket underneath me. “You know me, Neo. I change feelings more than most people change their underwear.”

“You’re giving some people too much credit on how many time they change their underwear,” he joked and I reached out and hit his shoulder playfully. “Babe you’re overthinking this. You’re consistent enough to have dealt with me for the last entirety of your life thus far—and we both know I’m a handful.”

“Oh absolutely,” I laughed, “Poor Dalton has no idea what he’s walking into.”

I expected Neo to laugh with me but I was met with silence. Looking at him, I saw him staring down at his palms, not a trace of amusement on his face.

“Neo?”

“I’m not seeing Dalton anymore.”

“Wait, what?” I asked, propping myself up on my elbows. “Why?”

“He called my best friend a bitch. There’s no coming back from that,” he said, trying to come off like it wasn’t a big deal.

“He called me a bitch?”

Neo modded his head, humming in confirmation. “He was talking to Blu when he said it.”

“Dalton you can’t stop seeing him just cuz-“

“Yes, I can, (Y/N).” His eyes came to meet mine with a hard sure look in them. “You’re my best friend in the whole world. No one is allowed to bad mouth you and still be apart of my life. I’d pick you over anyone, just say the word.” “B-But you really like him,” I said and he looked away from me and sighed, clearly thinking of Dalton.

“That doesn’t matter.” He shook his head as if trying to shake away the memories.

“Yes it does,” I insisted, leaning over him to grab his phone off his nightstand. There was no way I was gonna let my best friend’s love life suffer because I’m a coward. “What are you doing?” He asked confusedly as I unlocked it. “Calling Dalton.” 

“What?” he almost screamed before lunging out at me trying to grab the phone. I kept it out of reach and went looking through his contacts. He jumped on top of me, practically straddling me and took it back. “You are not calling him.” 

“Why not? You like him, he likes you,” I stressed. “You and Dalton shouldn’t be fighting because me and Blu.”  “I don’t care, I don’t want to see him. He called you a bitch and had the nerve to get mad cause I got upset. I don’t want to see him and I don’t want to talk to him, (Y/N). I mean it,” he said demandingly and I sighed and nodded my head. I knew better than to argue with him on this, even thought I knew he didn’t mean half of it.

***

“You should come home,” Lorelei pleaded. “I’m going insane without you guys.”

“Lori, Junior Year is not that horrible,” I laughed, rolling my eyes as I laid down on my bed, with my feet where my head should be. “Yeah it sucks and you’re gonna wanna kill yourself but you’re a big girl, you’ll survive.”

Lori was Neo’s younger cousin who adored Neo more than anything. And there’s nothing Neo loves more than being adored. So (as soon as Neo stopped treating her like a little kid) she became our resident baby back home. That one freshman who was hanging out with a junior and a senior all the time in high school? That was Lori.

“But I cant do another year without you guys let alone two!” She exaggerated and I laughed, shaking my head.

Forever the drama queen.

“We miss you too, Lori. Honestly we could use the comic relief right about now,” I mumbled, not really meaning for her to hear it but not being able to stop myself from saying it.

“Everything okay out there?” She asked, conern lacing her voice.

“Yeah, we’re fine. Just got some boy drama, nothing super spectacular. Other than that we’re aces babe,” I joked, letting out a sarcastic chuckle.

“You two always have boy drama.” I could practically hear the eye roll in her voice. “I wish I had your luck with guys.” Her being the youngest and Neo being super protective she never got the chance to do much dating. She thinks it’s because she’s unlucky but honestly? She’s gorgeous, she’s got her mother’s red hair and her fathers brown eyes and she’s one of the sweetest people I know and an absolute hopeless romantic. The second that she wants it (especially now that Neo is living with me and can’t breath down her neck anymore) she’s gonna have guys kissing the ground she walks on.

“Oh trust me,” I drawled, “You don’t. I’ve actually made a little bit of a mess recently which is why we have boy drama.”

“Ooo... do I get details?” She askes excitedly, probably already invisioning the movie/teen romance novel storyline I’ve been living.

“Yknow sometimes I forget that you and Neo are related and you never failed to remind me that you are.” I chuckled.

“And, we’re dodging already,” she said knowingly. “Whose the guy?”

This girl is gonna do amazing in psychology.

I let out a heavy sigh. “Who he is...” I trailed off slightly, picturing all the soft early morning smiles and kisses we shared, seeing the broadness of his smile and the adorable in his eyes. “Who he is isn’t important,” I shook my head to rid myself of the thought. “It’s his friend, Dalton. They like each other but Dalton called me a bitch and Neo wasn’t having it and now they won’t even look at each other and I know Neo is upset by it.”

“Wait, why did he call you a b-word?” I smiled a little, hearing the fact that after all these years she still won’t curse.

“Ugh, I’m gonna have to explain aren’t I?” I sighed, running my hand through my hair.

“Yup,” she said happily, obviously pleased that she’s gonna hear the story.

“I hate you, have I ever told you that,” I teased, going to my bed and curling up, clutching my childhood teddy bear to my chest.

“Several times actually,” she said with mock serious and I let out a laugh. “Now spill.”

“Alright alright, so there’s this guy. We...” Fell in love. “Has a thing a year or so ago and Neo had been seeing this new guy and what are the odds of the new guy being my...” I paused, stopping myself from saying my guy. He’s not mine anymore. “The guy I used to mess with’s roommate and one of his best friends.”

“So they’re not speaking because this Dalton guy doesn’t like you cause you and his friend don’t speak anymore?”

“Pretty much.” I sighed, digging a hand into my curls in frustration. “I’ve tried to convince Neo to just talk to him, but he’s as stubborn as a mule.”

“It’s a family trait,” she beamed and I smiled, really wishing I could hug her right now. I haven’t seen her since Neo and I moved in together. “But in all seriousness. You know Neo’s not gonna talk to him, right?”

“Sadly I do know that, I just wish-“

“No wishing,” she cut me off abruptly.

“No wishing?” My face scrunched up as I tried to figure out where she was going with this.

“Nope.”

“Then what am I supposed to do? My best friend-“

“Needs a little push.” I could almost hear the grin on her face as it began to click.

“Lorelei... are you suggesting I bypass Neo entirely and go talk to Dalton for him?”

“I would never suggest such a think,” she gasped overdramatically. “But if you were to do it, I wouldn’t say it was a bad idea.”

“Have I told you that I love you lately?”

“You don’t tell me enough,” she mused.

“If this works, I promise I’ll fix that,” I laughed.

“I’m gonna hold you to that.”

“I’ll call you later and let you know how it goes.”

“You better or I’m gonna come up there and beat you with your favorite nude pumps,” she threatened.

Shaking my head, I said “Later Lori.”

“Later babes.”

I heard there phone click off and sat there for a second before putting on my shoes and jacket and grabbing my keys.

This better work.

@jermeeeeee hope you like it hun

[thehomeforthehopelessromantics]

After All This Time Part I:

(Y/N)- your name

Blu- your love interest

Neo- Your best friend

“Can you just stop?” he shouted, his hands tearing through his hair in frustration— seemingly on the verge of pulling it out completely. I clenched my jaw and forced back the part of me that was ready to give in to his pleading. God knows how easy it’d be. “Why are you doing this? Do you enjoy hurting me? Because you’re doing a great job at it.”

He brought his eyes up to reach mine and I was faced with those flood gates of his that were threatening to open. Taking a slow deep breath I made myself stay put even though I felt my resolve slipping fast.

God, I didn’t think this would be this difficult.

“Blu, please-” My voice caught and he stopped, furrowing his eyebrows at me after hearing it.

Pull it together, (Y/N).

“Look, I just... I just don’t think this is working for me anymore,” I stated simply, trying to make myself look as detached as I could. A blank stare passing over my face, that I silently prayed he believed.

“You’re lying,” he whispered breathlessly, a sharp look of realization crossing his face. That look was quickly replaced by one of confusion. “Wha- why are you lying to me?”

“I’m not lying.” I tore my gaze from his— looking him in the eye made this whole thing so much harder than it already was.

“Yes, you are,” he insisted, stepping forward.

Screwing my eyes shut, through clenched teeth I hissed, “No, I’m not.”

“If you’re not lying...” With sure strides he came and stood in front of me. His hand coming up to grip my chin, making me look at him.

If the situation wasn’t what it was I might’ve found it in me to be annoyed or maybe even turned on, but one look into his eyes and all those feelings evaporated. I’d never seen him look so... lost. 

“If you’re not lying then look me in the eyes and say it again.”

I didn’t say anything. I couldn’t. Nothing I could say would be the truth and something about the soft, pleading way he was looking at me made it almost impossible to keep lying.

“Baby...”

“Blu, please don-” I whispered breathlessly. 

“Say you don’t want me,” he said abruptly, his hand moving to my cheek. I opened my mouth to ask where he was going with this, but he continued, his hand moving under my ear, his thumb tracing my jaw, “Say you don’t want me and I’ll let you go. I’ll leave you alone. For good.” His eyes left mine and began to stare at the place where his skin touched mine. 

I pulled myself out of his grasp, needing the cloudiness his touch made me feel to go away, and looked at him incredulously. 

He couldn’t possibly expect me to say that.

“I said this isn’t working for me anymore. Isn’t that enough?” 

“Look me in the eye and tell me...” he took a deep painful breath, looking like he was choking back more tears. “Then tell me you don’t want me anymore. If this- if this really isn’t working for you then that shouldn’t be hard to say, right?” 

The next few moments were silent. The sounds of both of our heavy breathing  being the only noise filling the space. 

“God, please say something,” his voice broke off, tears streaming down his face, despite how hard it looked like he was trying to stop them. I could almost taste his anxiety. His eyes scanned over me hastily, like he was scared I’d disappear. “Say anything. Just please- don’t stand there staring at me. I can’t take it.”

I tilted my head to the side slightly and sighed, shoulders dropping. I knew what I had to do. 

I was no good for him and I knew it. He might be hurting now, but this is for the best. 

I just really, really don’t want to do this.

“Goodbye, Blu,” I whispered and in his eyes, for a brief second, there was despair. 

Turning, I grabbed my stuff as fast as I could and started towards the door. His hand shot out and pulled me back to him, spinning me around and wrapping his arms around my waist. 

Burying his face in my neck he cried quietly, “Please don’t leave me.”

“Blu…” I sighed, screwing my eyes shut to try and keep my real feelings at bay. I had a decent handle on them, but fuck. Listening to him cry like this was killing me.

“We can make this work. I’ll do what-- I’ll do whatever you want me to, just please don’t leave me.” Sobs wracked his body and his grip on me tightened. I clenched my fists in an attempt to keep myself from wrapping my arms around him and telling him that I was staying. 

Discarding my bag and jacket on the floor, I tried gently pushing him up by his shoulders, but within seconds his hands left my waist and were holding either side of my face, looking me directly in the eye. “Unless you’re going to tell me you still love me and you’re not leaving, please don’t say anything.” I forced myself to stay silent, indicating exactly what he feared and the tears streaming down his face intensified. Shutting his eyes, he took a deep, ragged breath. 

“You said you loved me, goddammit.”

“Everything was fine when we went to sleep last night. We-,” his voice choked up as he placed his forehead against mine. “We were fine last night. You were watching Crazy, Stupid, Love and I was watching you because you’re way more interesting to watch than some guy pine after his ex-wife who cheated with some jerk named David Linhogin which is such a stupid name and you were falling asleep in my arms and you said you loved me. That was last night, (Y/N). Last. Night. What the hell changed overnight?” He rambled in frustration. Opening his eyes to look at me, he paused to see if I would say anything. When I didn’t he let out a hiccup sob. “I love you,” he whispered. 

I love you, too.

I heard him mutter something else, but I could barely hear it over the pounding of my heart in my ears. 

Prying him off me, with some defeated protests on his end, I took a deep breath, grabbed my stuff and headed for the door. I paused for a second, contemplating if I should say anything or just leave. With a shaky breath, I closed my eyes for a second. 

Every bone in my body wanted to turn around and kiss him until he realized I was bluffing and I wanted him as much as he wanted me. 

Clenching my jaw, I turned the door handle and opened it. As I stepped out, I heard him mutter a final, gut wrenching “Please…” 

It took everything in me, but I shut the door behind me and left.

***

A Year and a Half later...

“Neo. Let go of my leg.” I swear you’d never know this kid was 19. He’s been begging me to go to this party for four stupid hours and he was now clinging to my leg like a toddler, begging me to go get dressed and come with him. 

“Pleaseeeee. It’s just one party,” he pleaded and I rolled my eyes. 

“I’ll go to the next one.”

“You said that to the last 3 parties.” 

“But this time I mean it.”  “No, you don’t.”  “I can’t have this conversation with you while you’re still on my leg.” I shot him a sharp look and he sighed before crawling off me and standing.  “So you’ll come?” he said with hopefulness in his eyes. 

Aww, he’s so cute. It’s a shame that I’m not going.

“Nope.” I grinned, popping the p and plopping down on our couch and grabbing the remote. 

The remote was quickly snatched from my hand making me look at Neo like he’d lost his mind. 

“Hey!” I cried. “I was using that.” 

“You’re coming with me or else I will cut the boobs out of every shirt you own, mean girls style,” he threatened, grabbing the scissors that had been lying haphazardly on the coffee table for like a week. 

I snickered and took the remote back, starting to flip through channels-- completely unphased. “Be sure to make the holes even. My bras are really cute, it’s about time someone saw them.”

“I’ll cut your lucky hoodie.”

Now that I paused at. 

Slowly turning my head to look at him, I narrowed my eyes. “You wouldn’t dare.” I’ve had that hoodie since I was a freshman in high school. My older cousin gave it to me when I turned 14. It was mustard yellow with the words “abcdefuckoff” written in black. My grandparents were appalled, but were they gonna take it from me? Over my dead body. This was my favoriate cousin. They knew that trying to take anything he gave me from me would end badly. 

Needless to say, my heart dropped when Neo started running toward my room. I was on my feet faster than he could blink and on his heels. He reached my door when I sprung up and jumped on his back, almost making him fall in the process. 

“Alright, alright! I’ll go! Just don’t touch my hoodie!” I screamed as he balanced himself. 

“Yay!” he squealed, before setting me down on the floor. “Now go get ready.” 

*** “Damn, if I was straight you’d be my type,” Neo gushed, laying on this stomach on my bed waiting for me to be done getting ready. After showering, I’d put on my black t-shirt dress with a v-neck cut out, fishnets and my thigh high light gray boots. 

I chuckled as I slathered my lips in lip gloss. The only makeup I was willing to put on tonight was the gloss, mascara and some highlight. It just wasn’t a ‘spend all night worrying about a full beat face’ kinda night.

Turning to him, I grabbed my leather jacket and my phone off the bed and said “C’mon, let’s get this night over with.” 

He crawled off the bed, eyeing my leather disapprovingly. 

“What Neo?” I rolled my eyes. I already knew what was coming. 

“Do you have to wear that jacket?” he questioned, putting a hand on his hip. “It makes you look unapproachable.” 

“Well I’m not going out to make friends tonight,” I mumbled. Glancing over at him, I was faced with his infamous puppy dog eyes. 

Bastard. 

He knew I didn’t know how to say no to his puppy dog eyes. 

With a huff and a roll of my eyes, I placed my jacket back on the bed causing a smile to break on his face. 

Linking his arm in mine, he beamed, “Now, let’s get this show on the road.” Before practically yanking me out the door and to the car. 

The things I do for this kid. 

***

Maybe coming to this party wasn’t the worst idea in the world. Upon walking in I saw a few kids from some of my classes and Neo saw some from some of his so we agreed to meet back at the front in like two hours for a check in. An hour in and I was tipsy and dancing my life away. A guy I’d recognized from my anthropology class last semester was dancing behind me whispering sweet nothings in my ear, hands attached to my hips, making me giggle. I had no idea what song was playing, but it didn’t even matter anymore. 

Leaning my head to the side slightly, giving the guy access to my neck, a ghost of a smile appeared on my face. I felt his lips graze over my skin sensously as his hand came down to graze the skin just below my dress and above my boots. When bringing his hand back up he let the dress come up slightly too. 

Opening my eyes, I glanced around the room-- my tipsy self probably looking for Neo or an exit or deciding how far I wanted to take this. My eyes landed on someone whose eyes were trained directly on me-- well me and the guy who had his hands all over me. 

Blu. 

His eyes were blazing as he promptly downed and crushed the red solo cup in his hand. He’s usually a funny, goofy drunk until he sees something that ticks him off. Then all he sees is red. Something told me that he wasn’t staring at the hands that were still on my hips and the lips pressed to my neck because he thought it was funny.

“Why’d you stop dancing?” I heard the guy mumble into my ear, his voice hazy and seductive. 

If he’d talked like that a minute ago, I’d have already left this party with him, but now? With the way Blu was watching me? All I wanted was this guys hands off of me. 

With my eyes locked on Blu’s, I gently removed the guy’s hands from me. “I’m suddenly feeling kinda nauseous. I’m gonna...” Blu tapped someone next to him and then was walking in my direction. 

Uh oh. Time to go. 

Turning swiftly, I darted towards the stairs, not bothering to finish my sentence. Praying to find somewhere to just lie low until I could get out of here. I thought I was in the clear until a hand clamped around my wrist as I reached the top of the steps. 

“What? Is it midnight already?” I heard a familiar voice say behind me and I let out a breath. 

“Oh thank god, it’s just you,” I breathed, letting my eyes close while forcing my heart rate to slow. Turning I saw Moe, the tall leggy brunette that I’d met when I was a freshman-- also my ex fwb. I love her to death and she’s amazing in bed, but if I kept being her fwb I was gonna start to hate her and she was gonna catch feelings. I just wasn’t into her like that and I could see that she was starting to want me as more than just a friend. I remember our blow out fight when I called it off and she swore I didn’t care about her at all and shut me out for a about a week before realizing I’d just done both of us a favor. Now, she’s my right hand aside from Neo and judging by the way she was slumped against the wall she was very much drunk. 

“Glad to see me?” she teased, words slurring slightly, pushing her hair behind her ear. “God, I feel like I’m gonna tip over like a cow.” 

Laughing slightly, I went over and slung her arm over me, shaking my head. “You always were bad at holding your alcohol. C’mon kick off your shoes for me, babygirl.” 

Grinning like a toddler, she beamed. “I like it when you call me that.”

“I’m sure you do,” I rolled my eyes amusedly. God, she’s out of it. If only she could hear herself right now. “C’mon, babe. Shoes off.”

“Why?” she whined, pouting slightly. “I like these shoes.” 

“I know, but you stumble too much in heels when your drunk,” I explained calmly and was met with her stubborn eyes. Changing my attitude to one that was more assertive, I looked at her and demanded she take them off now. Knowing she didn’t have the fight in her to try and resist she took them off and I took her with me to go find Neo, keeping her from going off to flirt with the cute girls that were at this party. If she went off with one of them she’d be mad at herself in the morning and mad at me for not stopping her.

I found Neo standing in a corner talking to a girl I didn’t recognize. 

Seeing me out of the corner of his eye, he raised an eyebrow at me. “Is it find your ex fling night and no one told me?”

“Ha ha, very funny. She’s drunk and totally incapable of taking care of herself right.”

“You’re the worlds best ex fling,” he said sarcastically. He loved Moe like I did, but making fun of our past was just too much fun for him to pass up.

“Shut up” I rolled my eyes before pausing noticing that his hair was tousled. Reaching up to touch it I quirked an eyebrow at him. “Been having some fun huh?” 

With a toothy grin he leaned in and whispered “You have no idea.” I shook my head. Good to know he’s never gonna be bored. 

“Should I bother to wait for you or find someone else to take us home?” Neo might be an avid party lover, but drinking? It was never really his thing. And driving under the influence is just irresponsible of me, so that was out. 

“Wait for me, my guy had to dash out of here. Something happened with a friend of his getting super pissed off or something and they had to leave asap.” 

For a brief second I considered the possibility of the friend being... nah. The odds of that are too slim. I’m just still shaken up from seeing him in person after so long. 

“Actually we could get out of here now. Get her into bed,” he offered, nodding at Moe who was falling asleep with her head on top of mine. She’s too cute I swear. It’s a shame I’m not into her like that. “Grab some food and binge rom-coms in your room.” “Your boy toy left and now you’re over this party,” I teased, secretly being relieved that he offered to leave now. I didn’t want to risk seeing Blu anymore tonight.

“I got what I came for,” he shrugged. “You wanna grab Spanish food or Italian— wait stupid question. You always want Spanish food.” He rolled his eyes and I grinned and stood up on my tippy toes to press a quick kiss to his cheek, while keeping Moe in grasp.

“You know me so well.”

“Yeah yeah, I’m still picking the rom-com.” He daw right through my act, knowing that I wanted to pick the movie.

“But- but there’s this new one that I found that I’ve been dying to watch with y-“

“Nope, it’s my turn to pick the movie. You’re not talking me out of this.” He took the shoes out of my hand as he continued, “Come on, doll, let’s blow this popsicle stand.”

Rolling my eyes slightly, we dodged people and managed to make it to the exit in one piece. The whole time I was looking out for one specific face and even though I should’ve been relieved that I didn’t see him, I was a bit... disappointed?

***

Blu’s POV

Going to jail would be worth just this once.

I knew that I’d had a few drinks. I knew that in the morning I’d tell myself that that thought was stupid, but would I take it back once I sober? Not a chance in hell.

Maybe it wouldn’t be so torturous to watch if she didn’t look so good or look like she was enjoying herself that much. Jesus, how much has she had to drink to look like she’s enjoying this prick touching her?

She had a distracted smile on her face and I couldn’t even lie and say I wasn’t jealous cause fuck. Seeing her smile for this nameless lanky half wit was more than I could take.

I wish I could get a good look at the guys face, but I can’t cause they’re too busy kissing my girl’s neck.

I’m gonna lose it.

Her eyes opened and landed on me and I swear it was like she’d seen a ghost. She stopped dancing, meanwhile the guy was still practically groping her. I saw him whisper something in her ear and that was it. I couldnt take it anymore.

Chugging what was left in my cup and then crushing it out of anger, I turned to my friend Cole and tapped him, muttering a quick ‘I’ll be right back.’ Making my way toward her, I saw her eyes widen as she made a beeline for the staircase.

Fine by me.

As long I don’t have to watch this creep touch her anymore.

The guy looked lost until he noticed me coming up to him, steam practically coming out of my ears. He raised his eyebrows at me, “Can I help you?”

“Yeah. You can tell me who the hell you are and why they hell you were practically molesting (Y/N) a minute ago.” I fully intended to have a normal conversation with this guy, but the alcohol mixed with the jealousy in my system simply wasn’t going to allow that.

“The name is Jenson and we were dancing if you couldn’t see,” he said snarkily. “And you are? Her brother?”

“I’m the guy that’ll make your life hell if you lay a hand on her again.” All I was imagining was this guy’s smug look wiped off his face.

“She seemed to like having my hands on her. Maybe I should go find her. Ask her if she wants to head home with me,” Jenson taunted, glancing around the room as if looking for her.

Strike one.

My fist clenched.

Take a deep breath, Blu. Don’t knock him out.

“Have you been with her before?”

Strike two.

“Is she any good?”

Strike fucking three.

My fist shot out and socked him clear in the nose. I heard a satisfying crunch when someone came and grabbed my arm as I geared up to hit him again.

“Are you stupid?” Dalton’s voice hissed at me turning to look at him. I scowled, but I let him pull me away from the guy and over to a wall, knowing it was probably the best thing to do.

“I repeat. Are you stupid?” He chastised as he slapped the back of my head.

“Maybe I am, but the prick deserved it.”

“Oh yeah and what’d he do? Try to hook up with (Y/N)?” He said disbelievingly. Cole and Dalton both knew that even after all this time I was still completely sprung on her and she’s one of the few things that could make me lash out like this. I hadn’t ran into her in months so I was doing good. Almost thought for a second I was over it— and then I saw her here. Definitely not over it.

I stayed silent, clenching my jaw at the idea of her hooking up with that half baked carrot.

My silence must’ve been answer enough cause Dalton’s face contorted to one of shock. “Oh crap, she’s here? Why didn’t you say anything? We’d have left a long time ago.”

“Because you were busy talking to that guy and Cole was having a great time and I didn’t want to-“

“Bull. We both know that Cole wouldn’t have cared and neither would I. Cole’s the one who came and got me to stop you in the first place.”

“It’s the truth!” I insisted before pausing, rubbing the back of my neck nervously. “I also... I don’t know, I wanted to see her. Maybe finally work up the nerve to talk to her again.”

“Why would you talk to her again?” He placed a hand on my shoulder, trying to emphasis his point. “Blu, she left. No gun to her head, walked out and left you in tears.”

“I know that,” I hissed, jerking my shoulder so his hand fell. “I just...”

I just miss her like crazy.

“You just nothing,” he said sternly and I let out a deep sigh, shutting my eyes.

No, Dalton. That’s the problem. I just everything.

“Never mind. You’re right. Staying was a bad idea, let’s get out of here.” I opened my eyes and saw Cole coming up next to us. I love Cole, but when I’m pissed off there’s nothing he can do except get Dalton. He’s the only one who can get me to calm down... well. Not the only one.

“We headed out?” Cole asked, looking at me. Still trying to gauge if I was seeing red or not.

Cracking a smile, I clapped him on his back making him relax. “Yeah, we are. I need to ice my knuckles-“

“And this airhead needs to tell us all about the guy he was playing tonsil hockey with,” Cole taunted, looking at Dalton who’d promptly turned scarlet.

“Whoa whoa whoa, you were playing tonsil hockey and you stopped cuz Cole told you I was flipping out?” I asked incredulously before placing a hand over my heart mockingly. “You must really love me.”

“Shut up,” he laughed as he shoved me. “Let’s just get out of here before you start anymore fights.”

[thehomeforthehopelessromantics]

So, I’m a very inconsistent writer and it’s my senior year and I’ve been stressed within an inch of my life, but I have part 1 of something new I’ve been working on scheduled to be posted tomorrow. It’s really really long so I had to split it into parts (I think I’m gonna be notorious for this.) Excited to see what you think!!

-J

[thehomeforthehopelessromantics]

It’s Always Been Me and You: Part 2

Monday...

(C/N) POV

He saw you in the halls at school. You were at your locker, grabbing your stuff for your lit class. You had your hair up in a ponytail and were wearing a red, white and black striped sweater with a pair of overalls on top.

Cautiously, he approached you. He had no idea how you would respond to him and the anxiety of it was enough to shake him to the core.

“H-Hey.”

You continued grabbing and putting stuff away like you hadn’t even heard him.

“Love?”

You slammed your locker shut, grabbed your bag and left without saying a word or even sparing him a glance. He watched your figure as you got further and further from him, coming to a terrible realization.

You were giving him the silent treatment.

***

Thursday...

(C/N) POV

“You have reached the voicemail of...” Groaning, he ended the call and slammed the phone down on his bed next to him. This was his 10th time calling you today and every time you sent him to voicemail.

Refusing to give up, he opened up messages and shot you a text.

‘Love, I know you’re still mad at me, but it’s almost Friday. Are we still gonna be together this weekend?’

‘Please answer me..’

‘I’m sorry.’

‘I miss you.’

***

Saturday...

(C/N) POV

(C/N) lied in bed all day, staring at a picture of the two of you on his phone. It was a picture of the two of you on his 18th birthday a few months ago. You had smeared frosting onto his cheek and were licking it off of him. It was by far the funniest picture the two of you had together, but right now it was just making him sad since he didn’t know if he would have that with you again. Tears welled up in his eyes the longer he stared and before long he found himself full on sobbing.

His mother came into his room, sensing that something was very wrong. She knew that you didn’t come over last weekend and that he was still at home this weekend.

Upon entering she found her beloved baby boy, face down in a pile of pillows, clutching them desperately as the sobs overtook his body.

Without a second thought, she came and brought him to her chest, rocking him slightly, while his hands cling to the fabric of her dress. Hot tears stained the front of her dress, but she couldn’t‘ve even cared less at that moment. Her son was hurting and needed her.

“I... I screwed up so... so bad, mom.” He mumbled between sobs. He wanted to stop crying, he wanted to pull himself together but he just couldn’t. His best friend in the whole world wouldn’t speak to him and it was beginning to feel like he was dying without you.

***

Sunday...

He tried calling you 20 times. He never got a response.

***

Monday...

You wouldn’t even let him get close to you at school.

***

Saturday...

(C/N) POV

You two had fought before. Yelled nasty thing at each other for hours. You’d both been vicious and cruel and yet still managed to work it out. This time it seemed like working it out was out of the picture. For two straight weeks, (C/N) had tried to talk to you. Call, text, at school-- nothing. You wouldn’t even look at him anymore.

Today, he decided that enough was enough and that you were gonna talk to him whether you liked it or not. He couldn’t keep going like this. You were his best friend and right now it was feeling like he lost you and it was killing him. He tried being around Lilith a bit more, hoping that it would help, but ultimately it made him feel worse. 

And it wasn’t because Lilith wasn’t fun or interesting-- she was. She was that and so much more. She was a gymnast and student body president at her school. She volunteered at an animal shelter and was kind and sure of herself.

She was all that (C/N) could’ve asked for in a girl and yet the only thing (C/N) could think was that she wasn’t you. 

He needed to fix things with you as soon as humanly possible. 

Working up the nerve, he finally got out of his car that he’d been sitting in for 15 minutes now. He walked up to your door and knocked. 

As the door opened the apology started falling off his lips, “(Y/N), I’m so sorry for-” He quickly realized it wasn’t you at the door, but your older brother, Ace. 

“Hey, don’t stop on my account. I’m sure (Y/N) can hear you from wherever she is right about now.” 

“Ace?”

“Surprised?” he said, breaking out into a boyish grin. “Her birthday is coming up and I have a break from classes so I figured I’d come to surprise her. She has no clue I’m here yet. Did you really think I was gonna miss it?” 

“N-No, I just wasn’t expecting you to open the door.” (C/N)’s cheeks turned red with embarrassment. “Where is she?”  “She went somewhere with our parents. They made sure she was out of the house so I could come.” Ace said calmly as he crossed his arms over his chest. “Now why exactly are you showing up at the front door, apologizing profusely? You and the little monster get into a fight?” 

(C/N) nodded his head slowly, looking down at his feet. “I messed up really bad, Ace. I have no idea how I’m gonna fix it.” 

Ace paused for a moment before gesturing for (C/N) to come in. “I’ll tell mom and dad to keep her out longer.”

They sat down in the dining room and (C/N) began to explain exactly what had happened between them. By the time he was done explaining, Ace had clenched his jaw.

“She has every right to be pissed at you,” Ace scowled. “That was a real a-hole thing to say.”  “I know it was. I just..” (C/N) sighed and ran his hand over his face. “It was in the heat of the moment, I didn’t mean it. Now, I can’t even get her to be around me long enough to tell her I’m sorry.”  

“Do you know why you still want to be friends with her?” Ace asked, knowing that he should be flipping the table and kicking (C/N) out because he hurt your feelings in a way that no one else could. But he didn’t, mainly because you weren’t the only one he watched grow up. It was you and (C/N), and Ace saw how happy being (C/N)’s friend made you. He also knew that the boy sitting next to him was deliriously in love with his best friend and that she was just as crazy about him. 

“Of course I do,” he said exasperatedly, letting his fingers absentmindedly fiddle with the friendship ring you’d given him two years ago. “She’s honest and loyal and one of the funniest people I’ve ever met. She doesn’t ever judge me and she always has my back.” A small smile appeared on his face as he spoke. “She’s the only person I can stay up all night talking to and still miss her the second we stop. I’ve never met someone that I just clicked with like that. I can’t remember what my life was like before her and I don’t wanna know what it’d be like without her by my side anymore. She’s my person.” 

5 years worth of memories flooded through (C/N)’s head, but he kept coming back to one specific night about a year ago.

The two of you were at his house and it was around 2 in the morning. You were cuddled on his bed-- him lying on the headboard and you on his chest, watching Shrek 2 with two empty tubs of ice cream next to you. Your eyes were trained on the movie, which made sense seeing as it was one of your favorites. His eyes on the other hand just wouldn’t leave you. His hands kept trailing up and down your arm, drawing light patterns on your skin with his fingertips. He could’ve stayed right there in that moment forever and he was sure he would’ve if you hadn’t jumped up and started singing along with the fairy godmother’s rendition of “I Need A Hero.” He watched you dance around his room in one of his shirts and he felt totally at peace. He loved when you wore his clothes. They were always far too big on you, but you didn’t care-- claiming you like the fact that it smelled like him— it made you feel safe and at home. You plopped down on the bed next to him when the song finished. With a huge, breathless smile on your face, you brought yourself up between his knees, your arms draped around his neck.   

In the most adorable voice he’s ever heard in his life you whispered, “Be my hero?” 

That was by far his favorite memory of you. It was also the first time he’d wished that he had the guts to kiss you. 

“What do I do, Ace?” 

“I honestly don’t know this time, kiddo,” Ace admitted. He usually knew what to do to help mend things between you two, but not this time. This wasn’t a ‘he ate my ice cream’ or a ‘she keeps stealing my clothes’ situation. This was about what he said, about this girl he’s been seeing and the unspoken feelings between you two. 

“Do you think she’ll forgive me?”

“I think she needs you almost as much as you need her.”

***

On (Y/N)’s birthday... 

(Y/N) POV

Your fingers hovered over the send button for a least five minutes before you just closed your phone entirely. You’d retyped the message a thousand times now.

‘Can we talk?’

‘Do you wanna come over?’

‘I miss you.’

‘I wish you were here.’

This was infuriating. You were still mad at him but today was your birthday and every other important person in your life was downstairs while (C/N) wasn’t.

You hadn’t heard from him all day and you honestly were missing him terribly over these past few weeks. You wanted him to at least be here, even if the two of you didn’t speak.

Deciding that you’d spent enough time pondering about if he was gonna show up tonight or if you should just call him, you stood and looked yourself over in the mirror.

You had on a quarter sleeve cold shoulder black mesh top, that was opaque over the breast but sheer everywhere else. Paired with a skater skirt and a pair of knee-high boots, you looked stunning and ready to take on the world. Turning on your heel, you opened your door and waltzed downstairs to see your family waiting for you.

You were gonna be okay regardless of whether or not (C/N) showed up.... Right?

***

You were sitting on the couch, under Ace’s arm, listening to your Aunt Delilah tell a story about the time she accidentally performed at a concert she wasn’t supposed to be at in the first place. You were okay. Sitting with your family, talking, laughing and eating. It was fun, but you couldn’t shake that feeling that had been gnawing at you all night.

(C/N) should be here. He’s family too.

As Aunt Delilah finished her story, her husband, Ricky, piped up. “Hey, sport, where’s your other half? Usually, we can’t get you two to stop talking long enough for Delilah to get through a story.” Everyone laughed as you tried to give a smile that probably looked more like a grimace.

“Umm, I think he’s-” you started but were quickly cut off by the sound of the doorbell. Furrowing your eyebrows you looked around. “Are any of you expecting anyone else?”

Murmurs of no went through your family as you stood up, going to answer the door. You left the living room and went through the dining hall and the kitchen in order to get to the door. Upon opening it your jaw just about hit the floor.

Standing in front of you was (C/N) in a black hoodie and jeans holding a huge bouquet of carnations— your favorite flowers.

“Happy Birthday, Love,” he said nervously. “I-I know you’re still mad at me and I shouldn’t have shown up here today, but I couldn’t help myself. I had to see you.” He handed you the flowers. You looked up at him and quirked an eyebrow. “You still won’t speak to me, huh? Jesus, I made a real mess out of things, didn’t I?”

He dropped his head to stare at his feet as he blinked back an oncoming wave of tears and shoved his hands in his pockets, shuffling anxiously, mentally preparing himself for you to tell him to go away or to throw the flowers back at him or to slam the door. His chest hurt just thinking about the endless ways you could get rid of him.

“Thank you,” you said and his head snapped up to you. “I didn’t think you were gonna show up.”

“And miss your birthday?” He asked incredulously. “I wouldn’t be able to live with myself.” He bit down on his lips as he looked at you. He could’ve cried he was so happy. You were speaking to him again.

Shifting your weight from one foot to the other you asked, “How are things with Lilith?” You kept a calm face but internally you were praying he said awful. You didn’t know if you could handle it if things were going well with her.

His eyebrows raised in surprise. Of all the things he thought you would say, he didn’t predict that one. A nervous chuckle left his lips. “Nonexistent as of recently.”

“Really? What happened?” You asked curiously, a small part of your foolishly hoping that it had something to do with you.

“She just... she wasn’t what I really wanted.” His eyes met yours as he spoke and a shiver went down your spine. You nodded your head slowly. “Can I... can we talk? Please? I really need to fix this.”

You shook your head and stepped back gesturing for him to come in. The two of you walked silently into the kitchen where you took a seat on a countertop and he leaned against the wall across from you, gnawing on his bottom lip. He’d prepared his apology at least a hundred times on the way here and now, with you in front of him, he couldn’t say one word.

“So, are we gonna talk or do you want a picture?” You said with an icy edge to your voice, breaking the silence. The tension in the room was driving you mad. The corners of his lips turned up ruefully.

“(Y/N).. I am so sorry for what I said. I didn’t mean a word of it-”

“Why did you say it then?” You had intended to let him finish what he was saying but the question had been plaguing you for weeks now and if you didn’t get an answer you were gonna scream.

“I...” his voice trailed off. “I don’t know. I know that’s not a good enough answer but it’s the truth. I don’t know why I said that or where that came from. You’re my best friend and I love you. These past few weeks without you have been the worst weeks of my life.” He pushed off the wall and came and stood a bit closer.

Not close enough.

“So, what? You say sorry and I’m supposed to pretend that you didn’t basically tell me that you don’t want to be friends with me anymore?” You furrowed your brows in frustration. You wanted to forgive him, you missed him like crazy, but he still hurt your feelings really badly and you didn’t want it to feel like what he said to you was okay.

“I don’t expect that at all,” he said honestly. “I honestly was expecting for you to raise hell when I showed up here in the first place. It’s totally fine if you’re still mad at me-- I’m still mad at me, just don’t shut me out anymore, please. I can’t take it. The silent treatment is killing me and I miss my best friend.” He stuck his bottom lip out in an adorable pout that he only brought out when he wanted something from you. It was totally unfair and he knew it but he was desperate. 

You let your shoulders drop as you let out a long sigh. You were trying to stay mad, but when he did the pouting thing and sounded so miserable, you felt your resolve slipping fast. 

“Do you really think I’m clingy?” You asked in a small voice as you looked down in your lap. 

“No.” He came and stood in front of you. He wanted to pull you to him and kiss you until both your lips were sore, but he settled for just being close to you. In those few weeks without you, he almost forgot how much self-restraint he had to practice around you— and how intoxicating your presence was. “You are in no way, shape or form clingy. If anything I’m the clingy one. If you aren’t there I don’t even know what to do with myself,” he laughed lightly and you let out a snicker as you rolled your eyes shoving him lightly.

He quickly caught your hand in his own and held it against his chest as he moved to stand between your knees. Leaning forward he placed his forehead on yours and your breath caught in your chest.

He was so close.

You were grateful that you were already sitting or else you were sure your knees would’ve given in already. His scent engulfed you, making you feel safe and at home like it always did.

“I’m lost without you, love,” he whispered as he bumped his nose against yours. “I’m not prepared to lose you, (Y/N.) I can’t. I won’t survive it.”

You knew you should say something back. You should tell him that you forgave him or to back away or question him again, but you couldn’t even breath properly with him this close to you, let alone speak.

Jesus.

You thought that your heart was gonna leap out of your chest if he got any closer.

He knew he should back up, that he was going just a bit too far— getting a bit too close.

He knew that he was doing things that friends shouldn’t do with other friends. But you were sitting in front of him for the first time in forever and you were looking at him with those eyes that had always been a weakness for him. He’d do just about anything you wanted and all you had to do was look at him.

As he stood there he noticed how shallow your breaths were becoming.

Could it be possible you wanted him too?

Swallowing hard he opened his mouth and began to whisper, “(Y/N), I’m about to ask you something and I want you to know it’s perfectly fine if you say no, alright?” His gaze flickered between your eyes and your lips that were coated in chap-stick since you didn’t feel like putting on lipstick. They looked so soft and inviting— all he wanted was to find out what they felt like when pressed against his.

You nodded your head slightly and he took a deep breath. “Can I k-”

“Who was at the- oh,” Ace said as he entered the kitchen, mouth falling open at the sight of his baby sister on the counter with her best friend hovering too close to be considered friendly. (C/N) pulled away from you like you were on fire— a small part of him was scared your brother was gonna beat him for being that close to you. Your cheeks turned scarlet as you stared down at the floor, baffled.

Was he about to ask if he could kiss you?

“I was wondering when you were gonna show up,” Ace smiled at (C/N) and threw an arm over him. “So you two made up?”

(C/N)’s eyes immediately went to you, silently begging you to tell him that things were okay between you. You nodded, maintaining eye contact with (C/N) who broke into the widest grin you’d ever seen on him.

“Great!” Ace exclaimed. “That means I don’t have to actually be her big brother and kick you out. Being her brother is exhausting, y’know.”

“It couldn’t be half as much work as being your little sister,” you joked, sticking your tongue out at Ace.

“On the contrary, little monster, you continually prove yourself to be quite the handful. Especially around loverboy here.” Ace squeezed (C/N) shoulder in a playful manner, but (C/N)’s stomach lurched as he looked at you, almost scared of your response.

You saw exactly what your brother was doing. He knew you had feelings for (C/N) and he was trying to call you out. Refusing to give him the satisfaction, you simply said “If anyone’s the handful, it’s you. The number of times I’ve had to lie for you. God. I should get an academy award for my performances.”

A strange sense of relief and disappointment spread in the pit of (C/N)’s stomach. You hadn’t said anything basically outright telling him that you didn’t want him, but that was because you didn’t address that part of the sentence at all. A second ago, he was pretty sure you were gonna let him kiss you because you wanted him too, but now he had no idea.

“Yeah, yeah.” Ace rolled his eyes. “Be sure to give me a shout out when you win your first award since I was the one who gave you your first gig. Let’s go, Uncle Ricky is waiting.”

“Why?”

“You know him, he’s as nosy as it gets. He wants to know,” a sneaky grin spread across your brothers face as he looked between you and (C/N), “what was taking you so long.”

Your heart immediately dropped to your feet as you realized the compromising position your brother had caught you two in. “You wouldn’t dare.”

“Try me, little monster.” Ace smirked at you before blowing you a kiss and starting to run away. You were quick on your feet and chasing him almost immediately.

Heels be damned.

“Ace! Get back here!”

Ace ran all the way to where your family was sitting in the living room, opening his big mouth he said breathlessly with a huge grin on his face, “Hey Uncle Ricky, you won’t believe what I-” You didn’t even want to know how he was gonna finish his sentence and you weren’t gonna find out. You literally jumped on him, causing you both to topple to the floor as a chorus of laughter erupted throughout the room.

Popping up, onto your feet and adjusting your skirt so you weren’t flashing anyone (by anyone you meant (C/N)) you gave everyone a bright smile and said: “Guess who finally showed up.”

Everyone followed your line of sight to see (C/N) standing in the doorway, staring back at you adoringly. You were the only person he knew that could tackle your older brother to the floor and get up like nothing happened.

“C/N! Hey, come on in, have a seat,” your mom said and (C/N) happily obliged.

You watched for a minute, loving how well he fit in with your family before he turned to you and patted the empty seat next to him, mouthing a quick “I miss you,” that made your heart flutter before going to sit next to him. Automatically, he had you under his arm, pulling you to his chest and you had to fight the smile that was trying to make its way onto your face.

***

“Are you gonna stay the night?” You asked while absentmindedly tracing shapes on (C/N)’s abdomen. Your family had left a little while ago, your parents going upstairs as well as Ace, the rest of your family going back home. It was around 11 now and you and (C/N) were still sitting on the couch cuddled together.

You had your head in his lap and his fingers gently traced the frame of your face, moving into your hair to play with it.

“I didn’t pack an overnight bag,” he said with a small pout, almost upset with himself. “I didn’t think that this night would go as well as it did. Thought you would’ve slammed the door in my face.”

“You thought I was that mad?”

He scoffed as he tugged at your hair slightly to make you look at him, “You gave me the silent treatment for two straight weeks. You wouldn’t talk to me, look at me or even be around me. Yeah, I thought you were that mad.” Rolling his eyes, he let out a sarcastic laugh.

“Well if it makes you feel better, I was hoping all day that you would show up. I didn’t care if we didn’t speak at all, I just wanted you here. Felt wrong having every other important person in my life here and not having you here.”

“Really?” He asked, looking down at you with uncertainty. “I thought you didn’t care. Was scared that you were done with me entirely.”

“Don’t be ridiculous.” You hit his stomach lightly. “I don’t care how mad I get, at the end of the day you’re family. I can’t imagine what my life would be like without you.”

He smiled down at you softly, your words making him practically melt. After two long weeks, you were here, lying in his lap, staring up at him with those gorgeous eyes and he couldn’t have been happier.

“Alright, alright,” you waved a hand dismissively through the air. “Enough sentimental stuff, you know I love you already. I wanna know what happened with Lilith.”

Knowing that they didn’t work made you happy in a way you shouldn’t be but you were also curious as to why.

“Oh uh..” using his free hand he scratched the back of his neck nervously. “Nothing really. We started spending some time together and she’s amazing, but she’s just not what I need, y’know?”

His heart was pounding in his chest. This felt too much like him telling you that he wanted you and it was scaring the life out of him.

“What is it that you need?” You asked, staring up at him with innocent questioning eyes.

You. You. You.

“Just... something else. Someone else,” he muttered under his breath, almost hoping that you didn’t hear him. He wanted to tell you exactly how he was feeling. He thought about how easy it would be for him to just blurt it out, but he didn’t know if you felt the same. He would rather keep you in his life as a friend than lose you trying to push for more.

And yet, as much as he tried to sit there and convince himself that this was enough— that just being your best friend was enough, everything in him was telling him it wasn’t. It never would be.

He wanted to be your best friend, your boyfriend, your lover, your confidant, your other half. He wanted to be able to kiss you and call you his. He wanted you— all of you.

“(Y/N)?”

“Hmm?”

“If I asked to kiss you what would say?”

You could’ve choked on your own spit as your eyes snapped to his before you got a hold of yourself and gave him a playful smirk, thinking this was just another one of your normal teasing moments. “Awww, honey. If you wanted me all you had to do was say so,” you said singsongily as you sat up so you could look at him directly.

“So that’s it? All I have to do is say so and you’re mine?” He wrapped an arm around your waist and pulled you closer to him.

“Just say the word and I’m yours,” you mumbled in agreement, beginning to feel like this was more than your normal teasing. His eyes were trained on your lips, staring at them like you would stare at a piece of art. “(C/N).” you said lowly.

“Yes?” He whispered, still staring at you as his eyes glazed over. One of his hand reached up to push a strand of hair behind your ear.

Hesitantly, you leaned in until you were a breath away from him. One small move and his lips would be against yours. “Tell me what you want.”

Titling his head he leaned in and let his lips brush over yours. “You.”

Your heart was beating so fast you couldn’t even hear it anymore. “What are you waiting for?” you mumbled against his lips and that was all he needed to hear.

He smashed his lips to yours fervently and his hand cupped the back of your neck keeping you pressed against him, while his other hand tighten around your waist. You kissed back just as desperately, grabbing him by the front of his hoodie to draw him closer, not liking the space between the two of you, no matter how small.

You pulled back for a second to say something, but completely forgot whatever it was you were gonna say a second later as he reattached his lips to yours. Without even thinking, he grabbed your leg and placed it on the other side of him so you were straddling him. He knew he should probably slow down but he didn’t know how. Not when you tasted this good and felt so right pressed against him like this.

His hands didn’t seem to know how to stay still, moving from your face to your neck to your waist and hips to your bare thighs as your skirt continued to ride up. Absentmindedly you grinded down into him, eliciting a surprised groan of pleasure from him. His lips left yours for a moment to pull his hoodie off, the fabric was keeping him from feeling you the way he wanted and it was driving him mad.

Gripping your hips and pulling you close, he pressed open mouth kisses to your neck. He stopped for a moment to bite down, causing a moan to come from the back of your throat and you felt him smile and laugh a little against you.

“What’s so funny?” You asked while trying to catch your breath. He pulled back to look at you, pressing a firm kiss against your lips.

“That’s the first time I’ve ever heard you moan,” he said with pride laced in his voice. He loved the sound and had every intention of pulling it out of you as many times as he could. You rolled your eyes at him and shook your head.

Before you realized it, he had your chin gripped tightly in his hand, forcing you to look him in the eye. “Keep doing that and I’m gonna have to give you a reason to roll your eyes.”

The threat sent a shiver down your spine as he leaned in and bit down hard on your bottom lip, making you wince.

After licking it to ease the pain, he looked at you again, a sharp challenging look in his eyes. “Understood?”

Not trusting your voice, you nodded your head. If you weren’t turned on before you definitely were now.

Smirking at you, he mumbled, “Good.” And then you were lost in his kiss again, his tongue forcing its way into your mouth, making you let out a broken moan.

You don’t know how long you sat there locking lips, but things were getting heated quickly between you grinding into him, his hands moving further and further up your thighs, gripping them so tight that you were sure you were gonna have bruises in the morning and the moans you both were letting out. The sexual tension alone was enough to drive you to keep going, but eventually, you needed to breathe, much to both of your dismay.

Pulling back, you both tried to catch your breath. His grip on you didn’t loosen at all, he was scared you’d move away if it did. Simultaneously you realized that this wasn’t just some guy who you kissed and were now on top of— this was (C/N.) Your best friend.

A part of you was scared that it was just a heat of the moment thing rather than anything more. God, you prayed it was more.

“Well, that was...” you started dazedly.

“Yeah,” he finished for you, still out of breath, a small smile making it way onto his face.

“So um,” you cleared your throat, sitting up a little straighter while taking a deep breath, pushing a few stray hairs behind your ears. “What was that?”

“I think that was called a kiss, love. I’m sure you’ve done it before,” he teased, tugging you closer by your hips. You weren’t sure how much closer the two of you could get, but this didn’t stop him from trying.

“Yes, I’ve done it before,” you rolled your eyes, “I-”

“What did I say about rolling your eyes?” He asked sternly as he squeezed your hips to get your attention as if he didn’t already have it. You lost your train of thought as the idea of rolling your eyes again just to see what he would do crossed your mind.

“Uh, as I was saying,” you made a conscious effort not to roll your eyes like you wanted to. “Friends don’t kiss friends and we’re supposed to be,” you voice wavered off as he started tracing small circles on your sides, “just friends.”

Moving closer, he pressed light kisses on your neck. “We.” Kiss. “Aren’t.” Kiss. “Just.” Kiss. “Friends.” He bit you and you let out a small groan. His head moved up so he was looking you directly in the eye.

“(C/N), what are you trying to sa-”

“I’m saying that I love you,” he said with surety in his tone. He didn’t know if you felt the same way he did before, but after a kiss like that, he was sure. There was no way you could kiss him like that and not feel anything. 

You couldn’t believe your ears and you look at him with disbelief. “Babe, this isn’t a good time for you to be joking around.” The pet name slipped off your lips before you could stop it and he smiled. 

“And who says I’m joking around, love?” 

You bit down on your bottom lip, still not sure if you should believe him. It sounded too good to be true.

“Do you remember that night that we sat up in my room watching Shrek 2 and you started singing I Need a Hero?” he asked randomly and your scrunched up your face. 

“Of course, but what does that have to do with anything?”  “That was the night I realized just how hopelessly in love with you I am.” Taking your hands in his, praying silently that you believed him. “For as long as I can remember, you’ve always been there. I don’t remember what my life was like before you came into it. Every girl I’ve ever tried to be with always turned me down because they all said that they thought that I was in love with you. At first, I thought they were crazy,” he let out a quick laugh as he looked down at your hands. “Until I realized that I was comparing every girl to you. None of them even came close to you, baby.” 

“(C/N)-” “Wait, just... let me finish this. I might chicken out if I don’t get all this out right now,” he said, cracking a smile. You nodded understandingly and he continued.  “The reason that I didn’t want you there when Lilith came over was that I knew if you were there, I wouldn’t be able to focus on anything else.” He let out a shaky breath, the first visibly nervous action you’ve seen out of him since he kissed you. “I tried getting over you. I tried to put all those feelings into Lilith, but the more time I spent with her these past few weeks, the more I thought of you. I even kissed her, and it was a good kiss,” you raised an eyebrow at him, silently asking why he was telling you about his kiss with another girl. Laughing a little, he kissed your knuckles. 

“But no matter how good a kiss it was, I still pictured myself kissing you. No matter how much I tried, she was never gonna be you.”  Placing your hands on his chest, he wrapped his arms around your waist. 

“I can’t keep kissing strangers and pretending it’s you,” he whispered like a confession. “I don’t want anyone else and I don’t want to pretend I do.”  You scrambled mentally for something to say and after a few beats you said with a loving smile on your lips, “You win.”  “I win?” You could’ve laughed at the puzzled look on his face. “I tell you I love you and you tell me I won?” He let out a nervous laugh. “Am I missing something?”

“You don’t remember our deal? You take a risk that I deem worthy and I’ll do any one thing for you. You told me you loved me-- huge risk. So you win. All you have to do now is claim your reward,” you said suggestively. He stared at you blankly for a moment before realizing what you were saying. 

You slung your arms over his neck as he grinned mischievously. “So I get to have anything? Anything I want? Including you?” 

“I said anything, didn’t I?” you said sweetly as you gave him a quick kiss on the mouth. He tried to kiss you again, but you stopped him. Before he could protest and plant another kiss on your lips you said, “I love you too.” 

That effectively froze him in place. This whole day had to be a dream. Not only did he get his best friend back, but she loved him back too? If he died now he would die a happy man.  “I’ve known it for a while now, I just didn’t think that you feeling the same way was possible.” You rested your forehead against his and whispered, “You can have me anytime you get ready, all you have to do is ask.”

“Be mine?” He whispered back, his lips ghosting over yours.

“I’ve been yours for a long time, babe. It’s always been me and you.”

This time you leaned in to connect your lips together, knowing that there was nothing else either of you could’ve said to each other.

***

One year later...

“Where’s the birthday girl?” (C/N) shouted as he came bathing into your dorm room with a bouquet of flowers and balloons and a gift bag.

Excitedly, you hopped off your bed and ran directly into his arms.

“There you are,” he mused as he hugged you back tightly. It’d been a while since you’d seen him face to face since you’d been holed up in your room studying for your Lit exam that was coming up. “Happy birthday, my love.”

Pulling back slightly, you pushed up on your tippy toes and pressed a firm kiss to his lips before mumbling against them, “Happy anniversary.”

Tag list:

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[thehomeforthehopelessromantics]

It’s Always Been Me and You: Part 1

You were at your best friend, (c/n)’s house having your weekly sleep over like you two had been doing since you were 13. After soon to be 5 years it had become ritual and it was hard to picture life without him. A few months ago you’d had a slight crush on him, but you seemed to have gotten those feelings under wraps since then.

“… (y/n)? Hello? Earth to (y/n)? Were you even listening?”

“Uhh, yeah. O-of course I was,” you stumble, lying right through your teeth.

“So that’s a no,” he huffed. “Am I that boring that even my own best friend won’t listen to me?”

“You’re not boring you just don’t have the most interesting stories to tell. Literally no one wants to hear a story about some cute girl you saw at the cafe that you didn’t even talk to. That’s like reading a novel where all the main character does is go to school, get good grades and goes home to a perfect family with little to no other human contact.”

“Well, what was I supposed to do?” he shrugged, looking at you confused.

“Talk to her. Tell her you thought she was cute, something.”

“And risk embarrassing myself?”

“Yes,” you breathed out exasperatedly. This guy is completely hopeless. “You know what your problem is? You go about life playing everything so safe. Take a risk every once in a while.“

"And do what?”

“I don’t know. Talk to someone you like or go skinny dipping, but as your best friend I’m requiring you to do something,” you said only half joking. Seriously, if he doesn’t do something with himself soon you think he might die of boredom. You can’t have that, he still owes you for all the times you lied and pretended to be his girlfriend. He can’t die before you cash in.

“Aww, (Y/N) if you wanted me to strip all you have to do is say so, you know that.” he teased, quirking up an eyebrow suggestively causing you to roll your eyes.

“Very funny. If I saw something I hadn’t seen before I’ll throw a dollar at it. You seem to forget we’ve been friends since we were 13. There couldn’t possibly be anything I haven’t seen, especially since the amount of times you walked into my stark naked claiming that’s ‘just what you usually did.’ I still have the nightmares by the way.”

“And you seem to forget exactly how much I changed in the past few years. For starters I don’t do that anymore, sadly for you.” He pouted at you mockingly, his hand coming up to graze the side of your face, resting on the spot where your neck and jaw meet.

"Yes because seeing a guy she’s been friends with forever stark naked is on every girls bucket list. How silly of me to forget,” you aid sarcastically, a small laugh escaping your lips as you flicked his hand away.

“Oh shut up,” he laughs. “You want me, love. It’s okay to admit it,” he teases having nothing else to say.

“Only in your dreams, babe.” You let out a loud laugh and he gives you a soft gaze and a smile.

“Alright. Let’s say I do risk it, what happens then?”

“Well you might just get the girls number.”

“Or get horribly burned. Girls can be cruel when rejecting guys, I’ve seen you do it before,” he countered, recalling your rejecting of other guys in his head. He imagined you saying those things to him and surprisingly it hurt more than he’d thought it would.

“Let’s make a deal. If you can take a risk that I deem worthy within the next month then I’ll do any one thing you want,” You offered, shifting to sit Indian-style. The strap on the tank-top you were wearing falling down. His eyes glanced at it, staying there a beat too long before returning his focus to you.

You had a sneaking suspicion you might end up regretting this deal the second it left your mouth and that mischievous glint in his eye came. Whenever you saw it you know one thing for sure— he was gonna cause some trouble.

“Anything? Anything at all?”

“Anything,” You assured. “So, do we have a deal?” You offered your hand to him and he took it with a smirk.

“Fabulous, so when I make you be my personal maid for 2 months don’t say anything. I might even throw in one of those cute little maid outfits, you’ve got the legs for it,” (c/n) teased. You reached out and shoved him.

“Shut up, you actually have to do it first, so don’t go picking out sizes just yet.”

***

The next weekend…

“Can you stop being so difficult?” You groaned, letting your head fall in your hands.

(C/n) was proving to be the most difficult person in your life. All you were asking was for him to go with you to this business party your parents were making you go to. He was already staying over your house for the rest of the weekend, so you didn’t see what the big deal was.

“Do you not remember the last time I went with you to one of these things?!” he hollered, throwing his hands in the air. “Let me jog your memory. A guy, hitting on you— me trying to be your protector. Me ending up in the fountain.”

“We were 14, for Christ’s sake! How long are you gonna hold on to that one?” Your eyes widened as you stared at him in awe.

Being this difficult must be painful.

“As long as I live,” he said, flopping down on your bed dramatically. Shaking your head you rolled your eyes for what felt like the 100th time today.

“Fine,” you said while positioning yourself so you were lying next to him, you staring at the ceiling while he looked at you from the corner of his eye. “Leave me there. Alone. With no one to talk to. I guess I’ll have to just have to talk to one of my parents semi interesting good looking 20 year old coworker’s son. I won’t really be paying attention though, I’ll be too busy imagining what he’d be like in bed.”

“You’re still a minor, in case you forgot,” he snapped at you, clenching his jaw as you spoke.

“Only for a little while longer,” you shrugged. “I wonder if he could make me cu-”

“Alright!” He cut you off abruptly. “I’ll go, just no more talk of you sleeping with a 20 year old. I’m still shocked you slept with Blake.” He rolled his eyes hard as he said my ex’s name. Blake was your first real boyfriend, you were together for a year and a half and he was with Monica for a year of that. Needless to say, you weren’t down with being just one of his girlfriends. (C/N) got so mad when you told him about it— you don’t know what he did to Blake, all you know is he never bothered you again and still cowers at the sight of (C/N.)

“Aye, that was a mistake. I didn’t know he had a whole other girlfriend at the time,” you defended, knowing you really didn’t have to. (C/N) understood what happened as well as you did.

“I told you from the jump something was off about that guy,” he started as his voice trailed off and a faint scowl appeared on his face. “He was always too perfect for you.”

“Ouch,” you winced, shifting onto your side to look at him. “Do I not deserve perfect?”

“Hey,” he drawled, turning to match my position so we were now facing each other, only a few inches apart. “I didn’t mean it like that. You deserve every good and beautiful thing in the world. Blake wanted to prove that he was capable of being the guy who deserved you. He never realized that you don’t need someone deserve someone who’s always perfect. You’d be bored out of your mind. You deserve to be loved by someone who’s genuine and means it. You deserve to be happy with someone who’s just as happy, if not more happy with you.” Reaching out, he dragged a finger lazily behind you ear and down your jaw where he caressed the skin.

“You deserve to be desired and wanted and loved.”

Your lips parted slightly as he finished his mini speech. What on earth were you supposed to say to that? Maybe you could’ve come up with a proper response if he wasn’t look at you like that. You didn’t know how to describe it, but what you did know is that it made your whole body heat up. The air around the two of you got hotter as the seconds went by.

Not sure what else to do, you laugh nervously, grabbing his hand from your face and holding it in your own. “Someone’s been doing their lit homework.” You swallowed hard. “We should uh… we should go let my folks know that you’re coming with us.”

He nodded his head, still not taking his eyes off you— clearly lost in whatever tension was in the air between you two.

You sat up on the bed, pulling him up with you, letting go of his hand that felt uncharacteristically warmer than usual.

***

Next day…

“Can you hurry up please? Your parents are waiting for us in the car,” (C/N) called out to you through the bathroom door. You were applying lipstick as he spoke and you rolled your eyes. “Jesus, (Y/N), wha-“

He had every intention of asking you what you were doing that was taking so long, but when you opened the door, the words died on his tongue and his jaw dropped as he took you in.

The dress was all black and sleeveless. The collar coming all the way to the base of your neck. It hugged you in all the right places, accentuating your small waist. His eyes trailed down your stunning legs to see you had on a pair of simple black pumps. Looking up at your face he saw that your hair was pinned up beautifully with a few pieces of hair falling in front of your face. You had on a minimal makeup since you didn’t feel like having to worry about maintaining a full face. Just a light coverage foundation, liner, falsies and highlighter. You also had on a striking red lipstick that caught his eye almost immediately.

“Wow, um..” His hand shot up to rub the back of his neck as he looked you up and down again, still reeling over the sight of you. “You- you look amazing.”

“You don’t clean up too bad either,” you joked, reaching out to fix the collar of his shirt. He had on a crisp white button down and black slacks, looking very polished and put together. You had to admit, it was a very sexy look for him, although something was slightly off. Eyeing him closely your thought you might know something to help. You undid his top button and his hand came up to cover yours.

“Wha-what are you doing?” He stuttered, looking at you with a bit of panic in his eyes.

“The top button makes you look stuffy. Unbuttoned you look more… relaxed,” you explained. “More…” you searched your brain for the right word. “Sexy.” Your fingertips lightly grazed the now exposed skin unconsciously. It took a moment for him to comprehend what you were saying— your light touch distracting him but, the second it did sink in a smirk appeared on his face.

“You think I look sexy?” He teased, taking the hand he was covering and using it to pull you up against him. His free arm wrapped itself around your waist. You shook your head and laughed lightly, trying to calm your heartbeat. This was the type of stuff that made you start to like him before. The boy was such a goddamn tease— the worst part was that you loved it.

“Ha ha,” you drawled. “You’re really funny y’know that?” You patted his chest and pushed him back, needing the cloudiness you were starting to feel to go away. “C’mon, hot stuff. We’ve got a party to go to.”

You moved around him, reaching into your closet to pull out your floor length beige trench coat before putting it on and tying the belt on it snug. From the corner of your eye you saw him put on his black overcoat and gray scarf.

Turning to you he offered his arm to you. “Shall we m’lady?”

Slinging your arm into his you smiled at him. “We shall.”

***

“Y/N! Oh my gosh, hey!” An all too familiar voice shrieked. You tensed as you internally groaned, turning at the sound of her heels clicking on the floor coming towards you rapidly.

You were dragged into a suffocating hug with the girl and it took everything in you not to roll your eyes.

“Hello, Jacqueline,” you said, plastering on a fake smile as you pulled back. Jacqueline was the daughter of your parents boss, meaning that no matter how irritating you found her you still had to play nice. It wasn’t anything personal, she was just extremely spoiled and whenever you were around her it felt like she was bossing you around. “How are you?”

“Absolutely splendid!” She gushed. “Mother just bought me these…”

Her words started to sound fuzzy as you quickly tuned her out. You’d become a master at hold a conversation where you didn’t know or care about what was going on. That girl can talk for hours. She doesn’t really need a response. She just loves to hear herself talk.

You found yourself wondering where (C/N) was. He said he was going to the bathroom a few minutes ago, but now he was no where to be seen.

You let your eyes wander briefly before finding him talking to a girl, you think her name is Lilith. You didn’t know her too well just yet since she was new to coming to these events, but she was 17 like you and absolutely gorgeous. She was wearing a simple white dress that flared out at the waist. She had a body that any man— or woman for that matter would kill to get their hands on. More importantly she was smiling at (C/N) hard. She laughed at something he said and let her hand “casually” fall on his arm.

(C/N) looked just as amused and entertained by her as she did by him. Something about watching the two of them together made you picture them as a proper couple and you felt your heart sink.

You must’ve been frowning because Jacqueline snapped her fingers in front of your face, drawing your attention to her.

“(Y/N)? Have you been listening to me? Do you want to go get something to drink?”

“Oh uh,” you shook your head, as if clearing away your thoughts, “sure.”

She promptly wrapped her hand around your wrist and dragged you to the bar where (C/N) and Lilith were standing. The bartender asked you what you wanted and Jacqueline ordered a glass of champagne while you stuck with a Shirley Temple. You’re a light weight when it comes to alcohol, so unless you wanted your parents to see their daughter cut loose while intoxicated, you were gonna steer clear of the alcohol tonight.

“How ‘bout you handsome?” Jacqueline flirted, placing a hand delicately on (C/N)’s shoulder. Finally turning around he saw Jacqueline and removed her hand before he saw you and smiled.

“There you are, love, I was wondering where you were.” He watched as the bartender placed a glass of champagne in front of Jacqueline who took it and left, clearly not liking the response she’d gotten from (C/N). The bartender placed your drink in front of you and (C/N) quirked an eyebrow. “You’re drinking tonight? With your parents here?”

“Of course not, it’s a Shirley Temple. Do I look like I belong in a crazy house?” You asked absurdly.

“Too bad, I was looking forward to seeing you get on the bar and start dancing.” He grinned down at you.

“Sorry to disappoint.” You rolled your eyes as he bumped his hip with yours.

“Oh by the way,” he started, putting his hand at the small of your back to push you forward. You came face to face with Lilith, who was watching you and (C/N) curiously. “This is Lilith. She said the two of you hadn’t really met so, I figured I should help change that.”

“It’s a pleasure to meet you,” she said pleasantly, offering a hand to you. God, even her voice was gorgeous.

“Likewise,” you said politely, giving her a slight smile and shaking her hand, although you doubt she noticed. She was too busy watching (C/N) talk to the bartender about who knows what. You felt a spark of anger in your stomach as you quickly dropped her hand. “Well I didn’t mean to intrude on your evening-“

“Oh you didn’t!” She exclaimed. “I was just talking to (C/N) most of the night. Sorry if I seem a bit distracted. Are the two of you close?”

“Who? Me and Jacqueline?” You scrunched up your nose at the thought.

Laughing, she shook her head at you. “No, I mean you and (C/N), you two seem awfully comfortable with each other.”

“Oh, well we’ve been friends for about 5 years now. He’s my best friend, I don’t know what I’d do without him,” you said honestly. A small smile appearing on your face as you spoke.

“That so sweet,” she beamed as you took a sip of your drink. “This might seem a bit forward, but does he have a girlfriend?”

You choked on your drink as the words left her mouth. “I’m sorry- what?”

“Oh c’mon,” she begged. “You’re his best friend, you have to know if he’s seeing anyone.”

“If you want to know if he’s single so badly then ask him,” you snipped at her like it was obvious. Clenching your jaw, your body tensed up as you tried desperately to keep anything rude or snarky from leaving your lips.

“Please,” she grabbed your hand and took it in both of her. “I’d be mortified if I asked him that and he said he had one. I know he’s your friend and all, but please. Help me out here?”

You looked at her and she was giving you puppy dog eyes. For a brief second you weren’t upset that she wanted (C/N), you were upset that she didn’t want you. She’s gorgeous and clearly willing to put in effort.

You got rid of that thought as quickly as it came before you sighed. “He’s very single at the moment.”

She let out a squeal before mouthing the words thank you and giving you a big hug. She then promptly left to go talk to (C/N) again. You watched for a moment and saw that he was putting his number in her phone and vice versa. That’s when you decided you’d had quite enough of tonight and wanted to go home. You ended up sitting with Jacqueline for the rest of the night listening to her talk about some guy who accidentally spilled his drink and it almost got on her new designer shoes and handbag. You watched Lilith and (C/N) talk and laugh and felt a deep sense of sadness in the pit of your stomach.

***

Wednesday…

You’d been a bit off for the past few days and it didn’t go unnoticed by (C/N), who tried to figure out what was wrong, but ultimately decided that you would come to him when you were ready.

“How long are you gonna be mad at this poor guy? He’s been walking around like a lost puppy for the past few days,” your friend Angel asked you, laughing as she took a sip of her water bottle. The two of you were sitting in the library during your lunch period. You were supposed to be studying but that quickly turned into talking about anything but academics.

“I’m not mad at him,” you argued. You honestly weren’t. You just couldn’t shake the feeling you’d had since the party. Being around him was weird at the moment since you didn’t know what it was nor how to get rid of it.

“Then can you tell that to him? He’s super out of wack.” You laughed lightly and shook your head. “Y’know I actually think that he likes you.”

“As if.” You ignored the little spur of hope that gathered in your chest.

“I’m serious!” Angel said, holding her hands up in innocence as you shot her a look tell her to stop. “Believe what you want, girlie. I think the boy has it bad for you.”

“If he has it bad for me then why did he get a girl’s number at my parents business party on Saturday,” you snapped back at her. She looked taken aback for a second before a look of realization dawned on her.

“You like him,” she whispered excitedly. “That’s why you’re avoiding him, because you’re jealous.”

“I am not jealous and I don’t like him,” you hissed at her, trying your best to defend yourself. But honestly hearing her say exactly what you were thinking was a tough pill to swallow.

“Whatever you say, Doll.” She winked at you and returned her attention to her book. Letting out a frustrated sigh, you did the same, knowing there was no talking her out of this. Also knowing that she was entirely right.

So much for getting control of that little crush.

***

Friday…

“What do you mean I can’t come over?” You asked (C/N) through the phone. You’d texted him letting him know that you had packed you bag for the weekend and we’re gonna shower and be over in half an hour. You were prepared to get over yourself and your feelings for the sake of your friendship with him.

He was way too important to you for you to lose him over a silly crush.

“I’m sorry, love. But Lilith wants to come over and see me and I don’t think it’s a good look if she sees that you stay the night at my house every other weekend. Besides, I…” his voice trailed off and got quiet. “I don’t know, I just don’t think it’s a good idea.”

“So I can’t come over because you wanna boo love with your new girlfriend?” You said sarcastically through the phone.

“Hey, that’s not fair. You know it’s not like that. What are you so mad about anyways? Can’t you just do something else this weekend?” He offered and it only infuriated you further.

“I didn’t want to do anything else this weekend. Weekends are our thing. They have been for 5 years. I’ve never made plans on a weekend that didn’t involve you. Hell, not even when I had a boyfriend!”

“I don’t know what you expect me to do here, (Y/N)! Lilith wants to come over and you can’t be here when she does. Weren’t you the one telling me to live a little? What? Now that I’m trying to, you’re mad at me?” He seethed at you and before you could even open your mouth to respond he was speaking again. “God, you’re so clingy.”

You were gonna back down. You were gonna apologize. You were gonna cool off. Then this bastard went and called you clingy.

“I’m clingy?!” You hollered, now on your feet, pacing the length of your room.

“Yes! Always hanging around me—attached to my leg like a toddler. Can you just grow up and get a life of your own already? God, I don’t even know why I’m friends with you, anymore.” He huffed angrily.

You held your breath, mouth hung open. “You don’t know why you’re friends with me anymore?” Your voice was calm and level compared to the yelling you were just doing. You didn’t sound angry or upset. You sounded calm, cool and collected. The drastic change of tone made his blood go cold, realizing just how badly he messed up.

The line was silent for a minute. He didn’t dare to even breathe out of fear of making this worse.

“Have fun with Lilith, (C/N).”

You ended the call.

[thehomeforthehopelessromantics]

Please

Y/B/GF- your best guy friend

C/N- crush name

Y/N- your name

C/N sat in an almost empty bar moving an untouched glass of whiskey between his palms, sitting across from your best guy friend (Y/B/GF). All C/N could think of was your face when you tried whiskey for the first time, you looked like a baby trying a lemon for the first time.

“Dang, you look almost as bent and out of shape as Y/N.” Y/B/GF piped up, after watching C/N stare into the glass for a few minutes.

“How is she?” C/N asked, finally looking up from his glass.

“Honestly, a wreck. She acts like she’s fine, but I know that she’s losing it inside. She’s cried herself to sleep every night since..” Y/B/GF’s voice trailed off, not knowing if he should say it.

“Since I screwed up and slept with someone else,” C/N finished the sentence bitterly.

After a few moments of silence Y/B/GF said, “Why’d you do it? I mean I thought you guys were the perfect match, so when she came to me crying her heart out, I was surprised to say the least.”

“I honestly don’t know. God I love her, I love Y/N,” C/N’s voice broke at saying your name, like it hurt to say it. “I was drunk and off my rocker and we were in a fight and I know that’s no excuse for what I did, but it doesn’t stop me from wishing I could change that night.”

“Look, I’m not condoning the fact that you hurt my best friend after I’d told you not to a million times, honestly I should punch you right now. But I think you should talk to her.”

“Do you think she would even want to talk to me?” C/N asked, looking as if the thought of you not wanting to talk to him hurt more than never speaking to you again.

“I don’t think that matters. She’s so out of it that I think she has to talk to you in order to even try and get herself back together. Have you tried to talk to her already?” Y/B/GF questioned. He didn’t like C/N currently, but he knew you needed to talk to him. He didn’t know if you two would get back together, but he knew if the two of you didn’t talk, you’d both be like this forever.

“I’ve seen her around campus, once I saw her laughing with some girls when she came out of her writing class,” C/N smiled at the memory. His heart clenched when he realized that he might never hear that laugh again for himself. “She saw me and stopped laughing and walked away.” C/N’s bittersweet smiled dropped completely.

“Alright, I’m gonna help you get a chace to talk to her, just don’t make me regret this, please. She’s hurting enough.” Y/B/GF said to C/N, who now hung on to every word Y/B/GF said eagerly. This was C/N’s one and only chance to get the love of his life back, he couldn’t mess this up.

***

You came into the little apartment that you shared with Y/B/GF, stumbling slightly. You practically ripped the heels from your feet, instantly feeling better. With a deep breath you called out, “I’m back,” your voice echoing through the small apartment, “Remind me to stop wearing heels to everything, I’m gonna break my ankles one of these days,” You joked as you hobbled with sore feet towards your bedroom. When you opened the door you were met with a face that made your heart drop to your stomach. Any trace of a smile disappearing from your face. You saw Y/B/GF standing on the other side of the room.

“What the heck is this?” You snapped angrily, clenching your jaw. “Why is he here?”

“Y/N just hear me out, please?” C/N stood after staring at you for so long and tried to speak to you.

“Why is he here, Y/B/GF?” You questioned again, refusing to speak to C/N.

“You need to talk to him, Y/N.” Y/B/GF tried to say sternly, but fell short after meeting your gaze.

“No I don’t.” You tried to walk out of the room when a hand caught yours making you stop breathing entirely. With what little fight you could muster, you tried to pull your hand from his, tears filling your eyes. You tried to blink them back.

C/N wrapped his arms around you and held you tight by your waist while you still struggled against him. His mouth dropped to your ear and you froze. “Please? Just listen to me. That’s all I’m asking. Please, Y/N?” His voice caught on your name and you closed your eyes. The sound of a door shutting was heard. With and deep breath and your heeart pounding in your chest you nodded.

Hesitantly he moved his arms from around you as you turned taking only a small step back. Even when heartbroken you still wanted to be near him. “Y/N, I am so, so sorry.” His eyes fought to meet yours, but you refused.

“Sure you are. How’s your new girl these days?” You hissed venomously. You fought back a bile that crept up your throat.

“There is no new girl. You’re the only one I want.”

“Really? That’s not what it looked like when you were inside her. Didn’t see anyone holding you at gunpoint last time I checked.”

“I made a mistake, okay? I'm telling you I’m sorry,” he pleaded, eyes begging you to understand him.

“And that’s supposed to make a difference?” You fought back.

“I️ don’t know I️ just wish that it didn’t happen.”

“Why’d you do it then?”

“I don’t know,” he cried. “We were in a fight and I was drunk and..” his voice trailed off, eyes holding back tears. Your heart clenched at the sight. “I made a huge mistake and it cost me… everything and I know that. But I want to try and make this right.”

“Well you can’t.”

“Why not?”

“Because I don’t trust you anymore.” You bit back and he looked at you as if he’d been shot. You forced yourself to look away from him and cleared your throat. “I think we’re done here.”

You turned to open the door when a pair of arms snaked themselves around your waist, making your breath hitch. He buried his face in your neck and you could feel the hot tears hit your skin.

“I can’t- I can’t do this without you. I can’t sleep, I can’t eat, I can’t live without you, Y/N. Please, please take me back, babygirl?” He begged, voice shaking. He tightened his arms around you and he breathed out the words, “I️ need you.”

Shutting your eyes to keep yourself from breaking into tears you whispered, “How am I supposed to know that it won’t happen again?”

You turned to look at him and he held your face in his hands, his cheeks dampened with tears. “I can wait. I can earn your trust again. I can prove myself to you, just please let me.” His hands tightened around your face. “Please don’t give up on me,” he whispered, resting his forehead against yours.

With a deep sigh you closed your eyes and nodded your head. Upon opening your eyes you saw the biggest smile you’d only seen when you agreed to go out with him in the first place, on his face. He pulled you into his arms and this time you didn’t fight him.

“You won’t regret this, I promise,” he whispered into your hair. "I love you."