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[the-right-to-write]

distance

I hope with all my heart that I am more than just a phase

I hope I am your crescent, your other half, your full moon

Reflecting your light close enough that you can see yourself in me clearly

And so that you will see that your light travels a long way

You are a beautiful sight for all to see

I love you, to the moon and back

[the-right-to-write]

ruin

A library, past and present. A grandeur collection of knowledge and wisdom, a sanctuary for truth seekers. Torn by the fate of war, a victim of destruction. Countless shared. Countless lost. 

And as such, we are left to wonder: If all records of history and fiction are lost, can anyone fully tell their stories from memory? Which parts of novels, of stories, of tales, stick with us for all of eternity? Do anyone of them stay long enough in our heads to make a lasting impact?

"Every story is tied to time," The older man says, his arms neatly folded behind his back as he traverses the rubble and piles of shredded paper, "A story can be read or told at anytime."

His son, youthful, but worn, looks at him. "Even ones that are lost?"

"Stories that are lost create new stories. As a storyteller, it is your job to take what you can salvage from the rubble, and create a new library. Rebuild this place."

The son's eyes glow with determination. "I will, Papa. I can't guarantee that everything will be the same, though."

"Oh, my son. You see, that is the wonder of a library. No two are ever completely the same." The older man pats his shoulder and uses his other hand to help him cross a large piece of debris. They stand in the center of a place that used to be something grandeur and intricate. A spot that held prestige, and now holds nothing but powerless prominence.

He looks up, to the sun peeking from the gray clouds. "I'm sure someday...this place will be filled with truth seekers again, eager to delve into this place and learn everything they can. Just like before the war."

2017-09-05 // Edited 2017-12-06

[the-right-to-write]

Where are you now?

I wonder which path your heart took you, since we parted, long, long ago. I wonder if you’ve grown just as much as I, in a way that changed you, for better or for worse. I wonder if there is a part of you that wonders what would have happened if you had gone down a different path.

A part of me wonders what could have been. If things could have been different.

But this was determined. Our paths were not meant to stay the same forever. And like the push and pull of the tides, some things were pulled into the ocean, while others were left behind. Where are you now? In that vast sea? Or still on the shore, along with billions of grains of sand, like the stars in the galaxy? Where am I? Am I on your mind?

Perhaps I’m lost at sea. Drifting far, far away to a brand new isle…a place you cannot reach. Wherever you are now, you are freer, you are shifting, in a way that I’m not able to. Not yet. But someday.

(2017-12-03)

[the-right-to-write]

lack

Is it selfish to want more than what I have?

What I have is next to nothing

I want to raise the bar

Give me more of a life to live

Leave me close to the action, not far

From dawn to the setting sun

I want my mind preoccupied

Don’t leave my song unsung

(2017-12-02)

[the-right-to-write]

Thai Indeed Ethnography

Saturday, September 23, 2017

Thai Indeed is located in Scarborough, Ontario at 3081 Kingston Road. It is situated on a busy street, but it is slightly difficult to notice unless you are passing through there everyday. Some trees obscure it from view if you are driving East. There are few parking spaces, but the plaza is never too busy and people don’t stay long, so it’s not hard to get a spot. The quiet plaza has a seemingly abandoned appliance shop right next to Thai Indeed, a flower shop, a shop for home decor, two salons, a tattoo place, a wine store, a carpet store, a European bistro called Vi Pei, a Japanese restaurant called Sushi & Wok, and finally, a convenience store on the opposite corner.

We get out of the car at approximately 1:20 PM. A sign on the door informs us that Thai Indeed will be closed on Tuesdays and making slight adjustments to their hours, which we take note of. On our way in, a white, middle-aged man makes his way out, carrying a closed paper bag and a can of coke. I presumed that he had ordered for pick up, and my dad held the door for him as he left. The first thing I noticed upon entering was a chalkboard sign that had “We’re the Diamond Winner for Best Thai Restaurant” written on it, and while that’s something that creates a good impression, I must say that it’s quite difficult to search up what exactly the Diamond Winner or the Diamond Award is. And Thai Indeed is not the only one that has apparently won this award. Other Thai restaurants have won it as well.

We’re greeted by a Chinese woman, who allows us to choose a spot to sit. There are no customers, and every table is neat and tidy, although six more customers, all in parties of two, eventually filter in after us. The fact that it was a sweltering day may have been a factor for the low number of customers. The Chinese woman, who happens to be the lone waitress, hands us menus when we choose our seat, immediately grabs an extra set of cutlery/dishes (since there were only two sets in the spot we were sitting, and we needed three), then pours us each a glass of ice water. She’s courteous, but not overly friendly to us for the duration of our stay.

The ambience of the restaurant is relaxing and exotic. There’s mellow music playing softly in the background, but I can’t quite identify the language. It gets a little dark the farther you sit within the restaurant, but the large windows in the front of the restaurant, with brown bamboo blinds raised at the top, allow for lots of natural light to come in. At the back of the restaurant are a few stacked boxes and two high chairs and an elevated plastic seat for small children. The walls are white, and flat, mahogany brown chair rails line every one. The front desk matches the chair rails. Scattered across the walls are several minimalist paintings with vibrantly coloured lines, images of Thai food, and images of tropical place. There are also a few dark brown shadow boxes high on the walls that hold cans of various main Thai ingredients, such as coconut milk. The paintings vary from being black and silver to being a bright red and orange in colour. The ceiling is black, with several yellow pot lights embedded in the tiles. Like the ceiling, the floor is also black, made with 2 by 1 tiles with a white and grey linear design. Each table is made of fine, dark brown wood, and all the chairs are comfy black leather. The booths, located on the walls of the restaurant, have dark brown leather benches, and drop lights with vintage style elongated bulbs, giving off a more intimate lighting. The cutlery and dishware are all plain in design. Overall, the layout of Thai Indeed is very minimalistic and simple, but I feel that the dark tones and simplistic style complement the colourful and eye-catching dishes. I feel relaxed and ready to dig in.

Speaking of the dishes, we are quickly served Thai Iced Tea and a large bowl of Coconut Soup with chicken. The Thai Iced Tea is a bright salmon colour, and is sweet and extremely milk-heavy. It’s very good, though I wouldn’t advise anyone who is lactose intolerant to get it. I have a small aversion to milk, so I don’t end up finishing the drink. There are other juices, soft drinks, teas, and even bubble teas on the menu. The wide variety of choices when it comes to drinks pleases me and makes me want to try something else the next time I go here. The Coconut Soup is steaming hot and comforting. It includes coconut milk, pieces of chicken, some pieces of lemongrass, sliced mushrooms, and some kaffir leaves. It also has a slight spice to it, but definitely doesn’t make your tongue swell up or anything; it would be perfect to eat on a cold day or when you’re sick because it really clears the throat and has a very nice fragrance. As we’re eating the soup, several people come in for pick up. A majority of them are white, with maybe a Chinese man and two Hispanic ladies. It seems like ordering for pick up is more popular than dining in here. Nonetheless, the waitress is quick to get their orders. She seems to know what they’ve ordered immediately as they walk in, which makes you believe that they have a very organized system when it comes to dealing with pick ups. An uber driver even shows up to deliver, and the waitress immediately hands him the right bag. She thanks all of them, and wishes them a good day.

Next comes the Deep-Fried Calamari, which is a bit overpriced in my opinion, considering the batter tastes quite dry, especially compared to the later more delectable dishes. It’s possible that they are ordered frozen. However, the layout of the dish stays true to Thai standards. The calamari is neatly decorated with an orange slice on top of a piece of lettuce, a small cut of a stock of celery, and a few shredded carrots. It also comes with peanut sauce and a sour sauce most likely made with a bit of vinegar with cucumbers and chili in it. We finish it despite its dry, bland taste. The Thai Grilled Beef comes after it’s sweet and spicy, and, similar to the calamari, it has an orange slice, lettuce, celery stock and pickled carrots topped with black herbs. The meat is pleasantly easy to chew on and has a nice texture. I notice that the restaurant phone keeps ringing, and it automatically says the caller ID aloud, which is a little awkward and disrupts the atmosphere from time to time. Luckily, the waitress doesn’t keep it ringing for long.

Then comes Indeed Pad Thai with chicken and shrimp, in a large heap of noodles and ground peanut bits with a lime, an orange slice, and more peanuts on the side. It has a nice, smooth texture, and has no spice, instead having sourness as its main flavour. That’s when we all start to feel hot, most likely because we chose a seat by the window, and today was unusually hot for the season. There is no air conditioning or any fans, so my dad goes downstairs to the washroom to wash up a little.

Soon after comes my own order, the Garlic Sauce with Tilapia. It’s easily the most vibrant and busy dish, which I find impressive. The golden crispy fish is covered in green and red peppers, garlic slices, carrots, and, you guessed it: an orange slice on a piece of lettuce. I have to work a little bit to get to the fish since it’s hidden under everything, but the first bite has me feeling quite good about my decision - the crispiness of the fish blends exceptionally well with the creaminess of the sauce and is perfect with the dryness of the complementary rice (cutely served in the shape of a star on its own separate plate). Overall, while all the dishes looked pretty similar in aesthetics and decor, they did ultimately follow the “Thai aesthetic”, making everything neat, colorful and aromatic - the food is really eye-catching and elicits excitement. The flavours of each dish are differ from one another, creating the famous palate blending Thai food is known for.

As I reach my eating limit, I take a moment to observe the other patrons, two South Asian men, a white elderly couple, and two white women, all conversing casually and ordering beers and mostly small appetizers. For a moment, I feel like we’ve ordered too much, but I push that thought aside rather quickly. I also take notice of the kitchen, which can be partially seen from our table. From what I can see, there isn’t a door, it’s all made with stainless steel, and there are at least 2 chefs. You can still hear the food being made and the chefs conversing from time to time, but it’s not noisy enough for you to immediately notice it the second you walk into the restaurant. It balances out the tranquility of the front of the house. I notice that there aren’t too many choices for dessert, but I’m alright with that. We’re too full to order any desserts anyway, so we ask for two styrofoam boxes to take home our leftover fish and beef, making sure to eat the oranges and pack the lime. As we pay the bill, our waitress leaves us each a guava candy - it’s a Chinese brand, but it’s something that’s often handed out in Thai restaurants around Scarborough after meals. She thanks us for coming, says she hopes to see us again, and as soon as we leave the table, she immediately gets to work cleaning up after us. She is very hospitable and quick on her feet, which is something I’m sure everyone can appreciate in a waitress. We pull out of the humid, hot parking lot at approximately 2:30 PM. I’m surprised that we were only there for a little over an hour, but I think that was thanks to our waitress being so fast and on top of everything, as well as the small amount of customers.

(Posted 2017-09-29)

[the-right-to-write]

How to Be Happy (a short story)

What does it mean to be “happy”? I ask myself that all the time.

People will tell you lots of things. Being happy means to sleep in every Saturday morning. To kiss someone under a mistletoe. To give back to your community. To eat your favourite ice cream out of the tub while watching TV.

So obviously, happiness is subjective. Great. When people tell me to think of something that makes me happy, I draw a blank. It’s embarrassing, really. Being practically the only person in the world that can’t identify their happiness. But how can I, when my father left me to survive in this cold, cruel world, or when the love of my life spat in my face and skipped off into the sunset with someone else?

I don’t want to make this a sob story. That’s not the point. The point is, I’m trying to figure stuff out so I can be better. So...how to be happy. How to be happy…

I suppose one starts by doing things that aren’t painful or cause any discomfort. Comfort for me is lying under the stars. Because unlike on Earth, where every little thing seems to be scrutinized and blown out of proportion, space is vast - always changing, and way more forgiving than your mother when you don’t feel anything. Like me, space is so empty, yet so full. So many things happening all at once, yet to others, nothing is happening at all.

I will never reach space. I will never touch the stars, dive into the clusters of galaxies or see the Earth from far, far away. But maybe just being underneath the celestial sphere is enough. I can spend all night looking up, so why wouldn’t I be able to do that with my own life?

This is how to be happy...you find something that makes you feel less empty and you don’t let go of it. You make it your own. You utilize it to the best of your abilities. And someday...maybe you’ll find yourself being filled with ideas, and inspirations, and wonder. And maybe that’s when you’ll start living again.

And isn’t the gift of life just a joyful thing.

(Posted 2017-09-21)

[the-right-to-write]

As Years Go By

As years go by

I stop and think

And remember

Why birds fly

Flying is like love, you see:

Easy to do

Hard without practice

But makes you feel free

As years go by

I begin to realize

That we are both like birds

Flying together in a blue sky

The shine of our feathers

Matters nothing to me

What does is

What we do together

The nest is empty

Just us two again

With nothing but peace

And love aplenty

As years go by

I stop and I know

Who we are has always been each other

And together, we soar high

(Posted 2017-09-04)

[the-right-to-write]

No One {a musing/reflection}

Someone once asked me “Who hurt you?”

I said, “No one.”

No one is allowed to know me. And I suppose at this point in time, not even I am allowed the pleasure of “knowing thyself”.

My mind followed the first question, raising many more, until it drowned every thing else in my head.

Who helped you when you needed help? No one.

Who told you that you were wanted, needed even? No one.

Who was there for you through thick and thin? No one.

And so these “no ones” lingered in my head for quite some time, spending many years drowning all the energy and inspirations I had.

But then, when I had long become no one myself, I had an epiphany.

I looked at the demons and asked them: “Who will help me?”

There was no answer.

“No one,” I said, “No one but me.”

Using the rubble, I started building. Rebuilding.

And eventually, instead of a tower, I found myself with a much sturdier castle. Something meant to be strong, to be used as a shelter.

And when I am finally able to invite new people in - just as I had done with the tower ages ago - I welcome them with open arms, so that when others ask them “Who hurt you?”, they can say without a hint of sadness or fear or hesitation:

No one.

(Posted 2017-08-17)

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Poems Inspired by Fiction (2/?)

Extinguished (Posted 2017-08-11)

Burning away

There, you lay

In my arms

On this dark day

You, my brother

Born from another mother

My best friend

Is this his end?

I dare not say

For he promised

To never fade away

Yet here, his flame’s dimming

And he cries in my arms

Telling me he loves me

As I cling to his warmth

I never thought I’d have to go through this twice

(My other big brother sank into the sea)

I can’t stand the thought of losing him

I can’t go back to being just me

The loner, the loser

The big crybaby

The grandson of an abuser

And in the next moment, brother is gone

A pile of ashes

And to my knees I fall on

I scream and cry

But nothing will bring back

The man who’s just died

And took half of me with him.

[the-right-to-write]

At the End of the Rainbow - Character Bios

Chrysanthemum Platina-Stricklickensen

Nicknames: Chrys, Santhe, Crispy Lick

Age: 17

Birthplace: Aelogia

Bio: Chrys is a willful, curious boy who loves a good mystery almost as much as he loves his girlfriend. He is stubborn and often reckless, but also kindhearted and hopelessly cheesy. Chrys has been through several ups and downs over the years with his deteriorating family structure, bullying, and his personal issues regarding his sexual orientation and gender identity, all of which are intertwined in what he likes to call “a big, fat mess”. But none of those things stop him from reading and adventuring.

Delphine Dior

Nicknames: Del, Deedi

Age: 17

Birthplace: Aelogia

Bio: Delphine is a sweet, youthful girl who always dresses to impress. Though she cares much about her fashion, she is not vain or narcissistic like some of her family members. Delphine passionately loves and cares for her boyfriend Chrys, and often serves as his primary impulse control and voice of reason. She herself is quite calm and cautious, but she also has a chipper side that only her friends see.

Daffodil Argent

Nicknames: Dil, Dilly

Age: 16

Birthplace: Glon

Bio: Dil is a friendly and playful person that doesn’t quite fit on the standard spectrum of gender, and thus, appears to be quite androgynous. Though they are often seen playing tricks or cracking lame jokes, in reality they are very wise, and full of compassion forged through their triumph over years of abuse and neglect.

(Posted 2017-06-13)

[the-right-to-write]

Writer Biography - Eiichiro Oda

(Posted 2017-06-13)

[the-right-to-write]

Cereal Dialogue

Rosser: Mornin', Brad, my man.

Brad: Hey, Rosser.

Rosser: Whatchya eating?

Brad: Cereal.

Rosser: That's nice - wait. That's MY cereal.

Brad: No, it's not.

Rosser: Yes, it is.

Brad: No, it's not.

Rosser: Yes, it is!

Lertea: [yawning] What are you boys going on about this time?

Rosser: Brad's eatin' my cereal!

Lertea: Brad, stop eating his cereal.

Brad: It's not his! We share everything in this common kitchen, do we not? That's why it's called a COMMON kitchen!

Lertea: We share some things, but not every thing. You have to respect peoples' stuff, Brad.

Brad: Oh, come on!

Tillis: Will y'all stop screamin' and shoutin'? It's only 8, for goodness sake!

Brad: Till, girl, c'mon, you're on my side, aren't you?

Tillis: The hell I know about sides! I need my beauty sleep! So stop shouting!

Lertea: You're the one who's shouting, dear. Rosser, just find something else to eat.

Rosser: That isn't the point! The man's eating my food that I bought with my own money!

Brad: We're bros! Bros share!

Lertea: At least ask first.

Tillis: Lertea...I don't know how you can have so much patience with these nitwits.

Lertea: [takes an apple] I say what I have to say, and let them handle the rest. Then I leave.

Tillis: And if they're still goin' on when you come back?

Lertea: I give them more words. Words can be quite deadly, when used correctly.

Tillis: Amen, girl. Amen.

(Posted 2017-06-13)

[the-right-to-write]

The Food You Deserve!!!

Stop!

Stand up!

Don’t zone out

Follow your history

Seek repurpose and enjoy curiosity

Energy, technology and creativity prove something deep

Good, fresh food starts special.

(Posted 2017-06-13)

[the-right-to-write]

Autobiography on My Own Writing

Being a writer is tough. I knew that from when I was eight-years-old, working on my first fan fictions and first fan comics. But it’s not impossible. I have to admit that writing has taken a backseat in my life recently. I still feel bad about it up to now, but at least with this Writer’s Craft class, I’ve been able to produce some work that I can say that I’m proud of. I had completely forgotten the uplifting and amazing feeling of creating something with nothing but my mind and my bare hands. This has been a nice homecoming for me.  

As a writer, I know I have a lot of improvement to make. My main problem is being stuck in one place - using the same types of situations and dialogue each time and just switching in different characters with slightly different traits. I’d like to expand my writing to capture more experiences and genres and cultures. Right now, my writing feels more like it’s been used and recycled too many times.

And though I do tend to beat myself up over what I’ve been able to write up until now, I can give credit where credit is due. I try my best to make things interesting. My simplistic works sometimes hold more than enough emotional weight to support them, I can make people laugh with a sentence, and the sweet, fluffy romantic or platonic interactions between my characters can definitely rot your teeth in seconds. There’s nothing downright horrible about my work, but I know that I can do so much more.

I think that’s the key to becoming better, in any field or activity - knowing you can do more, and choosing to do something about it.

(Posted 2017-06-13)

[the-right-to-write]

The Life of You and I 

A Collection of 10 55 Flash Fictions that switches between the point of views of a man and a woman in love (with each other).

(Posted 2017-06-13)

[the-right-to-write]

1 piece of writing from your favourite author + a reflection

This excerpt from Wicked: The Life and Times of the Wicked Witch of the West by Gregory Maguire is very simple in structure, but powerful. When first read, it feels like you’ve been hit by a large truck because of the emotional weight it holds. Liir’s words in particular are so innocent, yet mature in their own way, which suits his character perfectly. Maguire knows his characters well, and it’s astounding to think about how much thought was put into incorporating angst and innocence into this short piece. I want the same for my own writing. I want each word, each sentence, to have weight and meaning. I want my audience to feel. Emoting is important to me as a writer, and Maguire expresses emotions perfectly through the situations he sets his characters up in, along with their dialogues.

(Posted 2017-06-13)

[the-right-to-write]

At the End of the Rainbow (6/?)

(Posted 2017-06-12)

“O-Oh, sorry!” A soft, playful voice titters from above. I can’t quite make out their face in the sunlight. They laugh a little. “I didn’t think I would scare you guys that badly.”

The tall grass just reaches the crook of my arm as I sit up and wince at the pain in my backside. In my peripheral vision, I can see Delphine pout at several grass stains on her white dress (probably from falling forward).

I crane my neck to take a good look at the newcomer. Contrary to my first assumption of them being one of the assholes from Creekworth High, the “sister school” to our Nestworth High, it’s someone I don’t recognize. They’re dressed in ripped jean overalls, with one strap hanging down, along with a simple black tee, worn out loafers, and a newsboy cap on top of their brown, almost-grey short hair.

“I’ve never seen you before.” I say, amazed. In our little town of Aelogia, everyone knows everyone and their mothers. It’s not often we see strangers, unless…

“You a merchant?”

“Yup. From Glon,” They say. Their voice and tone certainly doesn’t match their appearance, nor the town they say they’re from. Glonians usually slur a bit when they speak.

I stare as this newcomer helps Delphine to her feet, and retrieves her hat for her, apologizing again for the scare.

“Say…” I stroke my chin, “Are you, uh...how do I put this without sounding rude…”

“A boy or a girl?” They grin toothily at me, “That’s what you wanna know, right?”

I rub the back of my neck sheepishly. “Only if you’re comfortable enough to share.”

“Oh, trust me, I am. Everyone hates me for it.” They say casually. “I’m a person.”

Delphine catches on quickly. “So, neither.”

“Neither, somewhere in between, sometimes both. Depends.”

“Well, whatever,” I dismiss the topic quickly. I know what it’s like to linger on this gender identity topic for too long. It never ends peacefully unless I cut it off. I offer my hand. “Nice to meet you. I’m Chrys, this is Delphine, an amazing girl who just so happens to be my girlfriend.”

“Hi,” She shakes their other hand, “You can call me Del if you want to, though.”

They chuckle a bit. “My name’s Daffodil. It’s kinda silly, so everyone calls me Dil instead, and I like it.”

“Del and Dil,” I test on my tongue. For some reason, I feel much more chipper than usual just by saying their names. “That’s easy to remember.”

“So...what’re you guys up to here?” Dil asks, crossing their arms behind their head.

“We were chasing that.” I point up at the fading rainbow.

“Really! I was doing the same thing.”

“Then that plaque doesn’t belong to you?” Delphine inquires.

“Nope! I just said that to mess with you.”

She hums, and glances my way. She knows what I’m thinking.

“Who could’ve written and placed that here, then?” I wonder aloud, kneeling in front of it again. “Did they know it would be situated directly under this rainbow, or was that pure coincidence?”

“There you go again, asking questions that can’t be answered.”

Dil speaks up, “But doesn’t one find joy and amusement out of life by asking unanswerable questions? We live our lives trying to answer them, and if we figure stuff out, great! And if we don’t, then at least we had fun along the way by challenging our minds and pushing the boundaries.”

Delphine and I stare at them. They start to shy away at all the attention. “What?”

“...You know, Dil?” I smile warmly, “I think I like you already.”