the-phiwi

[the-phiwi]

Wow! It looks like your phiwi had such a great time, I liked when you did the spins!

This phiwi also yearns for the centrifuge.

💛🥝x

I took my golden kiwi ice skating!

and made this silly video of us doing skills

🎵 The Blue Danube Waltz - Johann Strauss II

Phiwi had a lovely time!

[the-phiwi]

There was a rainbow on my butt!!

Phiwi loves gay people 💛🥝x

[the-phiwi]

Oh good on you phoala!!!! I have since seen photos of your performance and you did a fantastic job!

💛🥝x

Kia ora Phoala, its The Phiwi here!

Were you nervous at all to be on stage? I know I was freaking out that I wouldn't live up to all that is the golden pig.

Hope you are doing well all the way over in Aussie, sending you phiwi kisses 💛🥝x

Hi Phiwi, welcome to my blog!

I actually wasn’t that nervous at all to be on stage!! I always loved performing even before I met Dan and Phil and I was excited to perform in front of such a lovely audience. I will admit it was intimidating at first being the ‘replacement’ for my distant cousin the golden pig, but the more shows I did around Australia the more confident I got!

[the-phiwi]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ONE OF MY DADS

Thanks for making all my phiwi dreams come true

@amazingphil

[the-phiwi]

Kia ora phoala!!!!

It is nice to meet you! I am the phiwi, it seems like we were both created for the same purpose. I am jealous that you got to do more shows than me.

What's it like in Australia? I bet it's pretty hot, I am sad I didn't get to spend a proper summer in Aotearora before I was brought back to The Phouse.

I get the feeling we will get along really well!

phiwi kisses to you x

Do you know the fate of your Australian brother the phoala? is he ok? Did he come with you to the phouse?

Who? I don't think I have met the phoala sorry. But phey could just be hiding somewhere. I hope that's the case, it would be nice to have a buddy from across the ditch!

Love, Phiwi 💛🥝x

[the-phiwi]

Do you know the fate of your Australian brother the phoala? is he ok? Did he come with you to the phouse?

Who? I don't think I have met the phoala sorry. But phey could just be hiding somewhere. I hope that's the case, it would be nice to have a buddy from across the ditch!

Love, Phiwi 💛🥝x

[the-phiwi]

do the other sentient creatures in the phouse struggle to understand you because of your accent? or do they poke fun at you for it?

i’d imagine they’re all pretty civil but i could see the pholden phig speaking some nonsense about it accent

It did take them some getting used to, but they can understand me just fine now! Though the golden pig was rather confused when I started speaking, I think phey are a tad posh.

I must say though, both the golden pig, and Pheal's impressions of a kiwi accent sound a lot better than Dan and Phil's. I don't know what country dnp think they're from when they try it, it sure isn't NZ.

But that's okay. I've also been teaching everyone some kiwi slang! Cause hearing them repeatedly saying 'its gonna be hectic' got a bit annoying.

Thank you for asking me this!

Love from Phiwi 💛🥝x

[the-phiwi]

phiwi do you know why dan and the golden pig have beef?

I only know the golden pig's side of the story from what phey've told me. Apparently it's all to do with Dan feeling jealous of pheir radient beauty? I mean, the golden pig is one good looking stud.

I will admit, I asked the golden pig yesterday about pheir skin care routine, it really is immaculate!

One day I hope my coat looks as gold and shiny

Thank you for the ask!

Phiwi 💛🥝x

[the-phiwi]

I wish I were in dragon city

maybe one day

[the-phiwi]

Look what dads treated me to! Turns out you didn't have to send me any at all!

I am one happy kiwi!

Phiwi, have they been giving you any nz treats to make you feel at home?

If not I'll you 30 whittakers chocolate bars

Big fan of urs

- farren :)

If you could send me some that would be great!!!

Dan bought me a few perky nanas before we left, but I went through those pretty quickly.

I think Phil was maybe gonna order some treats for me from NZ, he knows all the good websites to import sweets from.

I didn't get to try whittikers whilst I was there so I don't know what I'd like. What one is your favourite Farren?

Love,

Phiwi 💛🥝x

[the-phiwi]

Phiwi, have they been giving you any nz treats to make you feel at home?

If not I'll you 30 whittakers chocolate bars

Big fan of urs

- farren :)

If you could send me some that would be great!!!

Dan bought me a few perky nanas before we left, but I went through those pretty quickly.

I think Phil was maybe gonna order some treats for me from NZ, he knows all the good websites to import sweets from.

I didn't get to try whittikers whilst I was there so I don't know what I'd like. What one is your favourite Farren?

Love,

Phiwi 💛🥝x

[the-phiwi]

Thank you everyone for 100 followers!!! I love you all so much and am so glad I snuck away to Phil's 13" ipad to make this account. Forhead kissies to the lot of ya.

The golden pig and I might make a cake to celebrate this occasion. I have never had cake before. So many new experiences still to be had!

💛🥝x

[the-phiwi]

Phiwi what is your favourite video that your Dad's have made?

Hmmmm, that's difficult since I have not been around long enough to see many videos. I have mostly been busy getting to know the other sentient creatures of The Phouse.

The golden pig showed me the geo guesser video where Phil thought the Sky Tower was in Seattle, and I took personal offence to that. So definitely not that one.

@amazingphil

[the-phiwi]

phiwi i love you i love you i love you i love you

do you miss new zealand??? it must be quite different living in the uk now 😓😓

Yes 🥲

Aotearora is such a beautiful country! I lived on a shelf in The Warehouse for most my life. So by the time I finally got out of there, I only got to see a small portion of Auckland central before I was flown to London.

It's currently winter here. Meaning it's cold, wet, and sad. Wish I were having a hot kiwi summer right about now.

It would be nice to go to a beach, but Dan and Phil never go outside, so I spend most of the days in the phliving phroom. I am still very grateful they adopted me, this is a very nice life I'm living, regardless of the country.

[the-phiwi]

hi phiwi i love u <33333

hi noa, no I love you <3

🥝💛x

[the-phiwi]

I love you too!!! 🥝💛

phiwi forhead kissies for you xxx

@the-phiglet @the-pheal @the-phiwi @pholdenphig i love u all you're iconic to me

[the-phiwi]

Phiwi!

I would love to hear your adoption story, how did Dan and Phil find you?

I am so glad you asked!

I was but a lonely kiwi sitting on a shelf, I mean, I did have my fellow kiwi friends but I yearned for something more.

I had always felt like my purpose in life was more than just to sit on a shelf collecting dust. Hoping that some stranger buys me for their garden as I sit there to rust.....

That's when a mysterious hand reached out and picked me up. My kiwi mates all watched me, the chosen one in envy.

The hand started stroking my metal feathers gently, assuring me that everything was going to be okay. They explained that I was to be spray painted gold and put on a stage in front of thousands of people. I almost shat myself. Alas, we went to the front of the store to buy the paint, and I got to see the outdoors for the first time. It was a beautiful moment.

I was strapped to a chair. I hear it's called a seatbelt, and is to keep passengers safe.

I was then taken to an undisclosed location and spray painted a bright yellow. (Mysterious hand person bought the wrong paint).

But that was okay, cause they got the right paint in the end. It felt nice when it was sprayed up my bum.

After I had dried, I got to meet this 'Dan and Phil' I had heard so much about. The dark haired one cackled very loudly when he first saw me, and the blonde one just started into my soul with a little smirk on his face.

Come show day, I was placed on a big black box. I was super nervous to be in front of all those fans. I was told about the legend that is the Golden Pig. How could one ever live up to such an iconic creature? I was afraid I would let everybody down, and that they'd wish that the pig was there instead of me. Phil gave me a pep talk before they went backstage to start the show, and I felt a little better.

After the end of the show, I wasn't sure what my fate would be. I am a pretty big kiwi, and London is 24 hours worth of flights away. Would Dan and Phil really bother to bring me back to their home? I thought I was done for.

Luckily, I was wrong, and I was brought all the way across the world to my new home in The Phouse.

And now finally, my life has a meaning. The sense of fulfilment is crazy. I got to be onstage in front of thousands of people. I am now painted gold and feel like a STAR. I have made great friends (hi Pheal and Golden Pig, ily), and have the most loving dads who treasure my existence. The Phouse is the height of luxury. When I was a lonely orphan at The Warehouse, I could have only dreamed of a life like this.

Thank you Dan and Phil for adopting me 🥝💛x